Bearing It All @starlightstruckdown - Tumblr Blog

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mournfulroses

Trista Mateer, from a poem featured in her collection titled The Dogs I Have Kissed

starlightstruckdown

And inevitably Tuesday’s gone as quickly as the wind blows

Yet, the imprint of a moment in its purity will so beautifully remain

It’s these moments that so unexpectedly weave the story of our lives

Life is what happens in between the moments we plan for

It’s these moments that you couldn’t ever possibly plan let alone imagine

These alone make all the rest worth every second

wetheurban

What a privilege to outgrow the version of you that settled for less than you deserved.

What YOU Are To Me

Your the moon to my evening sky

Infinite starlight shining close by

The North Star leading me home

When the storm found me all alone

Where my soul finds refuge, putting my mind at ease

Gentle like the caress of a midnight breeze

Nights full of snuggles

Pillow talk and cuddles

I choose to stay in your arms, held tight

Leaving no room for unwelcomed fright

Nowhere else on earth this free

Not a single place I’d rather be

My heart always knew what I didn’t see

Your touch sparks the light within me

Creating synchronous nedergy unbound

A place endless pure love was found

A place I thought I once knew

Until I uncovered the magic that is you

So Should you ever falter or drift

I will find you by the light you emit

Emanating without your control

Resonating deep penetrating my soul

It shines through every part of you

So bright it draws me right to you

@devinetheory-2

#Writterscreed #Poetryinmotion #spilledink #write-on-world #smittenbypoetry

Battered Yet So Perfectly Blended

Your presence steadily mended

All of the past scars

I hid behind the invisible bars

I kept. Around my heart

Strong as steel from the start

The cold nights no longer bothered me

Nights filled by your warm body wrapped around me

Our roots grew fast and strong soon turned to vines

Our mind body and soul effortlessly became intertwined

Safety for the first time

Vanished all doubts in my mind

The first time I felt pain

Shock can best explain

Usually I’m on guard for

Wasn’t even on my radar

Time has moved this behind us

Still fighting for my heart to catch up

It’s a tug of war each day

Endless perfection of love dancing with

Creeping uncertainty I hide

And it Has remained, buried deep inside

I try to go back to what we were

Solid in every way but with thorns I watch for

The beauty of a rose remains

The sweet smell entertains

The color so intense, it keeps my attention

your petals softly whispers in silence we don’t mention

I hear everything unspoken, pretending my stem isn’t broken

And somehow your touch still melts me theough and through

Always Craving the caress I’ve become addicted to

I can’t help myself, your touch is healing

My eyes still holding back unsafe feelings

It mever seemed to matter what we went through

Together So strong, your my best friend

And from the beginning grew into a diamond bond

Yet even the most brilliant diamond carries specs of darkness

Praying your light extinguishes them out

Trying to evict them is harder done than said

Betrayal of any kind had a way of lingering behind

Did I allow the bars to fall away too soon

All I want is to feel that purity, safety and certainty again

Afraid it was lust followed by moments of pretend

I’m struggling with my ability to shake this off

My warm safe blanket was tossed

And once I became cold again

The fears crept right in

Like I invited them

My only defenses weren’t on guard that afternoon

Suddenly showing up was voluntary security for my soul

They must be terrified of me losing control

When unwavering love comes along

And suddenly doesn’t show up one day ,

It’s like the ground under my feet sank

quick sand that was faster then I ever thought

All I want is to feel that purity, safety and certainty again

Afraid it was lust followed by moments of pretend

I’m struggling with my ability to shake this off

My warm safe blanket was tossed

And once I became cold again

The fears crept right in

Like I invited them

#Writerscreed #Spilledpoetry #spilledink #Smittenbypoetry #Write-on-world #Free write

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Unheard Screams

My unheard screams

Held me frozen except in my dreams

Needing an escape each night I’d pray

Fallen victim, battered and bruised I’d lay

Confined, no way out, or so it seemed

When you appeared with a soul that gleamed

A stranger one day, my saving grace the next

When I trusted no one, your presence felt safe and blessed

One day I made the decision to confide in you

Unsure how or what you’d say or do

Instinctively I trusted you

A kindred soul, safe and true

Why and how did u believe in this stranger over your friend?

Unexplainable yet I felt you, I couldn’t pretend

Daydreams of my escape all led to you

Not sure how I’d get there, instinctively I just knew

You were always meant to be the one

I saw my angel fly to me as high as the sun

You did what no one else could or would do

You saw through the bullshit until I landed with you

Love doesn’t express what’s felt in the depths of my soul

The last year threatened to break me as it took control

I didn’t even know if you’d take me seriously

Until the day you called the welfare check for me

Feeling immediately touched, moved, in shock, full of emotion

I now believed you were true, worthy of my devotion

Giving me courage I knew I had but couldn’t see

You led me back to where I was supposed to be

Now your my rock, my safe place my manifestation come true

Your the forever and always my soul recognized and intuitively knew

Stay by my side, my protector, my lover, my friend

My loyalty will never end

I also see you, I can’t pretend

My unexpected love

My angel sent from above

@devinetheory-2

#writerscreed #smittenbypoetry #writerscommunity #write-on-world #Spilledpoetry #spilledink #trauma survivor

Around Your Heart - Will Lowry

Let me disarm you, I'm not trying to own you I just want to know what it feels like to have your body so close Let me absolve you of the past that controls you I just want to know what you look like Without a weight on your soul [Witt Lowry:] Yeah, said you'll find what you're looking for when you stop looking All of your exes were lessons and You talk about them again, you keep on settling Wonder if love is the pain or the medicine You never let it in, well I guess it's your right But fake has been never my type And I didn’t build up this wall over night See, I wanted more than just lust for the night Then you came in my life You're you, you're different than them I'm used to them playing pretend I'm used to "You're only a friend" Fell deeper each letter you send I'm questioning love and again I'm questioning when it will end Then till I break and my heart don't break even I want this for longer than only a season And you didn't break me, you You came to pick up the pieces No you never hear it, but you is who I believe in No one ever perfect, but you are perfect to me and Lately I'm believing in love, you are the reason I'm talking to my angels above, wish you could meet 'em Wish I could see 'em one more day Just to hear his voice tell me everything is okay Just to show him that his son is here invoking a change To hear him laugh when I tell him about the stories he made Pretending like I'm okay I'm broken and you know it Building up a wall, I'll never show it Grabbing on my face, told me focus You're not the only one that's been broken I'm hoping you open up, I thought what? Thinking that I'm always open, but I realize I was swollen shut There's more to us, there's more to love than surface lust The surface front and tonight I might spill my guts She said [Kaskade:] Let me disarm you There's an army I'm fighting around your heart Let me disarm you Cause baby I just want to love who you really are So let me disarm you There's an army I'm fighting around your heart Let me disarm you Cause baby I just want to love who you really are [Witt Lowry:] And I love it when you take it all off for me You laugh and I sense that you're insecure Can't tell what he did before To make you feel like you less, you're more Your clothes are floored Guess I gotta glass full of feelings that I over poured And I can't handle my liquor We get love drunk and we keep getting sicker I tell you you're worth it, then something gets triggered You start crying, like "Mark why you lying?" Your beautiful body, you mine You're rolling your eyes, I get that you're trying See, lately my heart is surrounded by lines But if you have time, I would love for you to bear with me Look up at the stars and just stare with me Travel around the world through the air with me I just wanna be with someone that'll care with me Bear with me when it all comes crumbling down You pick up all the parts of me you see on the ground I gave him all of me and he was fucking around Look longer than now, see how I post a pic and they pounce, damn I know you're feeling distant Saying men are all the same, I can tell you different No I don't deserve a chance, but you're down to listen A broke rapper with a dream and a grand vision I'm damn driven and you know that I'm believing in you You focus on the things you said you never could do You focus on the drama, all you need is the truth And you to see what I see in you, if only I could too I don't want to be a memory Want to wake up and see you next to me Want to dream big, embed legacy I know I'm more than open sesame But if you want to break the door, you get the best of me That's when you said to me Yeah, that's when you said to me [Kaskade x2:] Let me disarm you There's an army I'm fighting around your heart Let me disarm you Cause baby I just want to love who you really are Let me disarm you Cause baby I just want to love who you really are Who you really are

#Music you can feel

When Our Minds Meet

A mystical mind meets cunning

Together they Never stop running

Just Take a pill

Making me still

Until the intuition kicks back on

Forever seeing what’s about to be gone

Patterns seem to be unavoidable

With all the love next to me

One moment I feel every vibe

Wondering do I simply fill that need

The same one I’m eager to feed

Please Catch me when I fall

Especially when it’s my thoughts that run wild

A love like this so rare

Brings with it a complicated scare

Hold me tight the only way I know how to feel safejus

Let mefeel your body against mine that I so crave

Sometimes Reckless inhibitions drive me

That when I need you to be free, with me

Join my chaos while grounding me

The way you once found me

#Write-on-world #Smittenwithpoetry #Writerscreed #Just hold me #spilledink

nush-writes

Is love perhaps just a dream, a delusional belief? Or is it for real? Do dreams come true? If so, then let us dream. Let us run away, away from this world and create our own, a place where it's just you and me, a place to call home. Am I being delusional, is it too much to ask for?

mypoeticsoul-ny

Fall

Words on paper, blank and white

Cannot see them, yet they bite

Eyes that speak unending novels

Without voicing any vowels

Hands that hold unending wealth

Cannot manifest good health

In our psyche lives a being

Who’s all knowing and all seeing

Let it be, unleash control

Don’t be scared if you shall fall

After every silent tear

One less thing you’ll start to fear

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starlightstruckdown

Fallen Angel

From my angel to a friend fallen into a love I never thought I’d feel

Trusting the process, believing we both wanted something fucking real

Knowing each other from flesh to our pasts, understanding trust is a big deal

The love followed the connection effortlessly like magic

I wasn’t prepared for the joker to pull a hat trick

My tears fall to the paper as you bail

Now alone, frozen, colder than icy hail

Pain lies deeper than the ocean floor

I thought you’d protect my heart, now ruthlessly tore

Lies coming from the same soft lips that kiss me goodnight

As you look in my eyes while pulling me into you so tight

A deep love uncomfortably resides within me

I can’t escape the pain that I was beginning to set free

Why was the truth so damn hard for you to fight

My protector, I thought we’d have it all, me your sun and you baby my light

Shot in the chest, seems my heart can’t get any rest

Scared and alone, I turn to see it was my fallen angel holding the gun

Paralyzed by shock and pain, unable to run

Blindsided, like blowing through a stop sign

Tonight my prescription begins with a bottle of wine

You kill mv soul slowly as I now see months of lies

You’ve lied with me watching my intense cries

Promising truth while staring into my eyes

How could you look me in the eyes

And simultaneously keep on the lies?

No remorse as you feel my cries

We’ve come so far just to break the most impossible part

Our foundation once so strong falling apart

Cautiously I had let love in as he dissolved the hard parts

The walls around my heart crumbled and came apart

Me, so cautious thinking Im prepared for anything as I’m so damn smart

How did I allow him to penetrate my heart

Soul shattering, my heart just like the glass on the floor

Lying in pieces, he walks right over me to the door

My soul’s only company is from the hotel lamp nights before

I truly believed I was the only one he adored

Or so I thought…blinded by my love for him, I never saw the impending storm

My mind body and soul now caught in the downpour

Lying in pieces like the lamp on the floor

We’ve come so far to knowingly keep on with the lies

Trust and love all a disguise

Realizing the lies after his continuous denies

he tries so hard to turn every around on me

So easy to have told me the truth from the start

Instead telling her you love her while lying in bed with me from the start

Reading every word I saw the lies

I soon realized parts of my poem were inspired by his muse

The pictures put me over the top

Flesh exposed, the denials wouldn’t stop

Why was it so hard to love and respect me

Confused by this pain you aren’t here to see

I’m undone, broken once again

I crawl back under the covers for protection

Too weak to pick up the pieces today

Here in bed I think I’ll stay

All I wanted was you and only you

Unsure of anything anymore that I thought was true

It’s never been about past relations

Its the lies to my specific questions

How could you say you’re truthful as you pretend?

I thought you were my best friend!

#Writerscreed #Write-on-world #relationship growing pains #poetryinmotion #Smittenbypoetry #spilledink

starlightstruckdown

Unheard Screams

My unheard screams

Held me frozen except in my dreams

Needing an escape each night I’d pray

Fallen victim, battered and bruised I’d lay

Confined, no way out, or so it seemed

When you appeared with a soul that gleamed

A stranger one day, my saving grace the next

When I trusted no one, your presence felt safe and blessed

One day I made the decision to confide in you

Unsure how or what you’d say or do

Instinctively I trusted you

A kindred soul, safe and true

Why and how did u believe in this stranger over your friend?

Unexplainable yet I felt you, I couldn’t pretend

Daydreams of my escape all led to you

Not sure how I’d get there, instinctively I just knew

You were always meant to be the one

I saw my angel fly to me as high as the sun

You did what no one else could or would do

You saw through the bullshit until I landed with you

Love doesn’t express what’s felt in the depths of my soul

The last year threatened to break me as it took control

I didn’t even know if you’d take me seriously

Until the day you called the welfare check for me

Feeling immediately touched, moved, in shock, full of emotion

I now believed you were true, worthy of my devotion

Giving me courage I knew I had but couldn’t see

You led me back to where I was supposed to be

Now your my rock, my safe place my manifestation come true

Your the forever and always my soul recognized and intuitively knew

Stay by my side, my protector, my lover, my friend

My loyalty will never end

I also see you, I can’t pretend

My unexpected love

My angel sent from above

@devinetheory-2

#smittenbypoetry #writerscreed #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #write-on-world #Escaping domestic violence #spilledink

starlightstruckdown

Wreakage or Ravage

Mesmerized by your smile and eyes, you captured my heart

Didn’t know you were an expert at breaking me apart

Thirsty for more but unable to convey

I always thought by my side you would stay

Restless and moody, I see through your veil

You say you want it all, but again you sail

Why do I stay, you continuously ask

Because my heart sees past the mask

I couldn’t ever turn my back on a once in a lifetime love

Even when my emotions bury me deep, I will rise above

My love, my soul is real, don’t leave me to fall down

I see your dichotomy, sometimes you wear the crown

Unexpectedly, my magical king becomes my despair

Leaving me to wonder is it ever really fair?

Can you ever see my feelings before yours

How long can you stand in the rain as it pours?

We can choose to have nothing left to give

Or create our own heaven and begin to live

I am confused by you

Misunderstood by your view

Compelled to stay by your side

As my soul simultaneously cries

Caught up in your lack of transparency

You’re good at turning it around on me

When will your unselfish love return to me

I had believed that the unconditional found me

It slowly escapes my grasp

As you see me only through my past

It’s all from MY trauma you claim

Do you even know my name?

I’m much stronger than you can see

Proving you don’t really know me

Only half of my pain have I shared

Knowing you’re not ready to see it all bared

My pillow stays stained as my tears continue to fall

When you turn away from me as I desperately call

If only you knew what I was made of

Youd understand why I fly above

Above the bullshit, I am unapologetically me

I will not change myself because you can’t see

I’ve made it this far relying on my own sense

I don’t understand why you continue to second guess

You were not there, you can’t possibly see through my lens

I’ve come this far without compromising my mind, body and soul

I will always be authentically me until the day it takes its toll

And even then, I can’t be anything other than free

If only you understood the essence that made me

Transition is here, decisions are rushing toward us

Praying we will have the strength to trust

In need of renewed faith, let’s drop our gate

Before we destroy what is divinely designed fate

#smittenbypoetry #writers on tumblr #writerscreed #love #free write #Write-on-world #Spilledink

Waiting for the End

It stays all inside my head

Made from sleeping alone in bed

Wondering and waiting why?

Not even dating so don’t try

Feelings of scare, bringing in 2 more unfair

Too much pain to care

3 of you now, how you dare?!

All alone or so it feels

I take what they deal

So much I’ve already faced

But all I can taste

Bittersweet tears of salt

Pressures of wondering is it my fault!

Lessons never learnedjj

Yet how much I continue to burn

A secret kept deep inside

Buried while I hide

Make it go away

But you all just want to play

I say over and over again

The strength to beat if I can

Time floats by so slow

If I scream will you go?!

Scared and unsure why it’s you?

The picture that my mind plays through

Nothing mattered at the time

Cigarettes and cheap wine

Who do I turn to now

Bent over in a bow

Battered and bruised

Feeling so used

Waiting for someone to emerge

Praying for the strength to surge

I’ve been here before

I tell myself once more

The blood stains will fade

But the emotional pain is forever made

And I’m still here

To tell of the fear

It’ll be okay

Wait just one more day

Photo credit- banksy art

#Sexual assault #Pain that stays #waiting #writerscreed #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #my writing #Smittenbypoetry #Write-on-world #Spilledink

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Passion and Pain

A heart once so open and free

Chained up, and only you have the key

We are Magical, beyond my dreams

my forever , far beyond what it seemed

Every part of you resonates with me

Finally close enough to Break me free

This connection is irreplaceable as the stars

Infinite times over, wouldn’t touch ours

I Met my match, I felt you to my core

Angels couldn’t of dreamt up more

Souls intertwined destined to be one

Two Hearts wildly in sync just as the sun

While minds played quiet, at first stayed back

Our Brains looking through a trauma filter attack

Self awareness intelligence all goes out the window when you love like you never thought.

You don’t know what you don’t know until experience taught.

That old glimpse of the ptsd pattern recognition in full effect.

When you love someone this much I never realized the intense effect.

Suddenly I feel things I haven’t in years.

Lost all control of my emotions in a crash of my fears

Relentlessly Playing on my basic emotions over and over again.

The smallest of a perceived betrayal is no consolation for the deep heartache within.

How could I ever imagine my life without you

I never thought I’d find you

Now that I did, life would seem meaningless without you

Such a place to be in, feeling so Intensely for the first time in my life

No one ever told me emotions like this were dressed in lace but cut sharp as a knife.

I must not have felt love like this before

Never felt beat down by the rising of the shore

Battling the shackles that guard my heart

Chaining it up again while simultaneously tearing them apart

What was once our demons we were forced to fight alone

We now battle together as we rediscover the inner strengths we have grown.

It’s like an avalanche I never saw coming, finding my way through the icy snow, the wind knocout of me, I eventually come up for air, the cold numbs every inchAnd unburying myself took time. Why is it always easier to get hurt than to recover? The heart is fragile, if Isoi have only learned that before it was love I did discover.

#Raw writing #Unedited #smittenbypoetry #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #pickledmafia #write-on-world #free write #love #relationship poetry #devinetheory2 #Writerscreed #Spilledink

remanence-of-love

jul-27

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