DREAM: "I need help I'm failing all my classes"

[ID: a digital painting of karl jacobs walking out of a lime green glowing portal. in the portal you can see a faint outline of some mountains and cactuses. He's wearing a knee length cloak that's half green and half purple with tassles on the bottom. karl is looking up off into the distance/ end id]

time travel man!!

Those who feel like imposters, who think "I should want this, I need to want this, I need to do this, or else maybe I don't actually want to be an artist like I thought." Even without imposter syndrome, it's soul-crushing to be unable to start, sustain, or enjoy the hobbies that once fulfilled you.

(or without ADHD, if they help regardless)

Physical print:

cover the page with a piece of paper and reveal lines/paragraphs as you read them

use a highlighter to emphasize important/interesting parts

take notes as you go to be physically engaged with the material

Digital media:

copy and paste the text into a doc/word processor

change the font size/style/colour to something more legible

make your own paragraphs and spacing

copy and paste one paragraph at a time to isolate them from the distraction of the rest of the text

install a browser extension like BeeLine Reader or Mercury Reader

zoom in on the page and scroll slowly so you’re revealing lines as you read them

physically cover the screen and reveal lines as you read them

if you do better with physical media, print it out or find a physical copy

Both:

read out loud

pace, move around, or use a fidget while reading

set a timer for 5 minutes and read in small chunks with breaks in between

divide the material into sections and read one section at a time with breaks in between

I have a friend I know from when we were both 6. She is the only person living nearby and so she saw me go from walking through limping to wheelchair on a daily basis. I keep her updated on my health even tho we rarely hang out anymore. She was gonna come over yesterday and I had to cancel. She asked if I can’t hang out later that day. When I said i won’t feel better later, that if I feel that bad in the morning later will only get worse she got annoyed and “joked” that I’m just finding excuses. And I was surprised, she knows all about me being disabled after all? So, a bit taken aback, I told her it’s a normal thing for me.

“But you got the diagnosis now, aren’t you better?? I thought you’ll get better now”

Mum: “So yeah, I was thinking that when I come down we could do visit an art gallery or a museum or something.”

Me: “I’ll have to see if I’m up for it, I’ve been going through a rough patch. I might not have the energy.”

Mum: “But you love art galleries.”

do everything right and still be sick. 

“don’t let your disability define you! Fight! INspirEd! Taking back my life from Cancer!” This narrative is everywhere in Able culture. If you JUST tried harder you’d get better. THAT is what they live and believe.