It's Ineffable, Darling...

God Save the USA

If tomorrow all the things I’d earned,

From working hard and long,

Were given to me all in full,

I’d wonder what was wrong.

Because working hard is not enough,

To get by in the country today,

250 years of corruption,

And they won’t let us have a break.

I’m no longer proud to be an American,

For I am no longer free,

And I pity and cry for those who died

In senseless wars overseas.

And I’ll gladly stand up next to you

When the scammers are put away,

Cause there ain’t no doubt, this land needs help,

God, please save the USA!

From ICE kidnappings in Minnesota,

To police violence in LA,

Across the nation we have a problem,

When there are things we cannot say.

No more free speech or autonomy,

The only sacred rights are to guns,

Pedophiles are protected to a fault,

At the expense of our daughters and sons.

I’m not proud to be an American,

Where my brothers and sisters aren’t free,

And I won’t forget the billionaires,

Who took my rights from me.

And I’ll gladly stand up next to you

When we burn all of their money,

Cause there ain’t no doubt, this land needs help,

God, save the USA!

I’m not proud to be an American, 

Where we ignore Lady Liberty,

And we shame and kill the huddled masses,

Just longing to breathe free.

And I’ll gladly stand up next to you

When we win it back someday.

We must fight and scream and never give in,

And we’ll save the USA!

America the Beautiful?

O beautiful for smoggy skies

For dried up lakes and plains

For open fields with no more men

To tend and raise the grain

America! America!

God, shed on Her mercy!

And serve the bad with all your wrath 

From sea to trash-filled sea!

O beautiful for immigrants

Whose strength is far unmatched

For trans kids and gay kids and innocents

Persecuted, killed and snatched

America! America!

God, smite this evil flame!

Who burns the poor and helpless boor

And does it in our name!

O beautiful for reflecting pools

And data centers galore!

That kill off all the wildlife

That most of us adore

America! America!

God, preserve this innocent life!

And forgive our sins and the hate within

That left it all in strife!

O beautiful for billionaires

And pedophile kings

For private jets and homeless vets

And insider stock trading

America! America!

God, punish us for our greed!

And provide us hope and the means to cope

With all these evil deeds!

O beautiful for hungry kids

Who dodge bullets at school

For teachers who are underpaid

And somehow keep their cool

America! America!

God, guide their caring hands!

Protect their souls in these perilous roles

On which the country stands!

O beautiful for different sides

Of the same political coin

Where one goes forward and one goes back

And we’re all forced to join

America! America!

God, save us from ourselves!

Mend our hearts and grant us smarts

To get out of this Hell!

O beautiful for hospitals

And insurance premiums

For women dying in childbirth

And waiting room tedium

America! America!

God, heal us with your love!

As we cannot afford to live

Without help from you, above!

O beautiful for Civil Rights

For reparations not received

For native blood that stained the mud

For millions made to grieve

America! America!

God, enlighten all our minds!

Make us see our equality

Before we’re out of time!

O beautiful for melting pots

For the fusion of ideals

For different creeds and different faiths

And none need be concealed

America! America!

God, help us to see reason!

That you’re the same no matter the name

You’re called by each congregation!

O beautiful for dropping bombs

On helpless civilians

For masses displaced from the human race

By simple love of kin

America! America!

God, avenge these wicked deeds!

And prove to all in shock and awe

We’ve still got some integrity!

O beautiful for freedom fights

For when we stand as one

For protesters and influencers

We the people refusing to run

America! America!

God, shed your grace on us!

And crown the good with brotherhood

And the courage to make a fuss!

O beautiful for future days

When we have won our peace

For stable temps and leaders with sense

And regulated technologies

America! America!

God, that’ll be the day!

We’ll really be a nation that’s free

Once we fight our way through the fray!

My Home Sweet Home

While the storm clouds gather right above our heads

Let us raise our voices, let them hear our dread

Let us all be open about the way we detest

The bread and circuses they want us to accept

God save America

Land that I love

Hear our pleading, stop the bleeding

Wounds that ache as they break all our hearts

From the racists to the predators

To the politicians corrupt with gold

God save America

My home sweet home

The Star-Spangled Clown

O say can you see

By the blinding white lights

What so sadly we hailed

At the plastic gold gleaming

Whose fake tan and toupe

Causing endless new blights

On the Fox News we watched

All our throats sore from screaming

And the four AM posts

That blame, insult and boast

Gave proof to the people

That our democracy is toast

O say does that shit stain with one foot in the grave

The biggest problem with dating Steve Harrington was that he was a relentless flirt. And while that was a plus at the beginning of the relationship because Billy was too scared to make the first move, now that they’re officially together, he knows that continuing to flirt with others was going to get to him. Billy knew that, rationally, Steve was his and his alone. When they were alone together, Steve was the sweetest guy on the planet, and he showed it with unmatched affection time and time again. But he also knew that whenever they were around other people, especially other guys, Steve liked to push his buttons and get him riled up, and there was no better way to do that than to make him jealous by flirting with whoever was around. And since they only had a limited friend group now that high school was over, that meant he mainly flirted with the only other two guys around: Jonathan and Eddie.

It was getting to the point that they couldn’t do anything with them without Steve coming onto them in some way or another. If they went to the movies, he always put his arm around whoever was sitting next to him. If they were at home just hanging out, he’d throw out pet names and cuddle up to them on the couch, just to watch Billy squirm. If they went out to eat, he would always share his food and tell stupid jokes and throw out dumb pickup lines just to watch everyone else at the table go red in the face. And finally, Billy was getting fed up with it, so he decided it was time to do something about it. He waited for a day when he knew Steve had to work, and called the other two up to try and figure out what to do. They met at Eddie’s place, figuring it was the best since there would be no one else there to interrupt. 

“So, I’m gonna be straight with you guys,” Billy said as they all got comfortable in the living room, “I think we should try and limit how much we hang out together, at least when Steve is around. I love him and I know he loves me, but whenever we hang out with you guys, too, he keeps flirting with you and it’s starting to get to me.”

“Why should it be getting to you?” Eddie asked as he picked at a scab on his wrist. “I mean, you said yourself, you love each other, you’ve told us before he only does it to get your goat, and he’s always been a massive flirt, it’s just in his nature. Nothing to get worked up over.”

“No, no, I think I’m with Billy on this. You’re right, Steve always has been a flirt, but I’ve never seen him go this hard when he’s in a serious relationship. I don’t think he’d ever cheat on anybody, but I also think it’s very possible for him to have a wandering eye,” Jonathan chimed in, then added, “Although, why he’d go for either of us when he’s already got someone way more attractive is beyond me. No offense, Ed.”

“None taken,” Eddie shrugged. 

“So, I guess this means we’re in agreement about hanging out less?” Billy asked, looking back and forth between the other two.

“I guess,” Jonathan nodded.

“Or,” Eddie said, a mischievous little smile coming to his face, “We could try a different approach.”

“Like what?” Billy asked.

“Like giving him a taste of his own medicine,” he said, that smile only growing wider. “Think about it, the only way for him to see how what he’s been doing is affecting us is to affect him the same way. Let’s teach him a lesson the hard way so he knows exactly how we feel about all this.”

“And just how would we do that?” Jonathan asked, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, don’t you worry, Jonny,” Eddie grinned, “I’ve already got an idea.”

By the end of the afternoon, they had their plan fully worked out, and all they needed to do was pick the right time to execute it. They decided on a Sunday two weeks later, since they would all have off work and it would give them enough time to gather the things they needed. They decided that, since Steve had learned how to push all their buttons, they’d learn to do the same to him. It wasn’t hard, really. Billy already knew a lot about what Steve liked, and a lot about what made him feel insecure, so they built off of that. And by the time the two weeks passed and Sunday rolled around, they were more than ready.

That morning, Billy woke up next to Steve in his bed, and he couldn’t help the giddy, anxious feeling rising up in his chest as he thought about what was going to happen in a couple of hours. He laid there and thought about it until Steve woke up, and when he did, he wiped the smile off his face and pretended it was just another day.

“Good morning, baby,” he said, rolling onto his side and kissing him on his nose.

“Morning,” Steve mumbled back, smiling lightly and yawning before returning the kiss. Billy let himself enjoy it before he made himself focus. It was up to him to get the ball rolling, and he wasn’t about to waste any time.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” he started, grazing his fingers lightly over his boyfriend’s chest. “Since we have nothing to do today, I thought that maybe this afternoon, we could… try something new?”

“Like what?” 

“Oh, I don’t know, like… like letting me, maybe, tie you up? I know you like to take care of me when I’m vulnerable, so I want to try and do the same for you, but since I know you like to be in control most of the time, I figured this might be the best way to get you to relax and just let me do my thing,” Billy explained, knowing Steve would go for it if he framed it like that. And of course, he took the bait.

“I think that could be arranged,” Steve grinned, kissing Billy again as they sat up. “But first, breakfast.”

“Good, I’m starving,” Billy smiled, “I’ll meet you downstairs, I gotta piss.”

As soon as Steve was out of the room and Billy could hear him heading down the stairs, he grabbed the phone off of Steve’s nightstand, dialing Eddie’s number and waiting. As soon as he picked up, Billy told him their plan was set in motion, and Eddie said he and Jonathan would be there for the next part in an hour or so. Billy told him he’d leave the front door unlocked for them and they both hung up the phone, excitement bubbling up inside them as they both went on with their next steps. For Billy, that meant getting out what he needed and getting his emotions under control before he went downstairs and joined Steve for breakfast, stopping by the front door to unlock it before heading to the kitchen. 

It didn’t take them long to eat, and the next thing they knew, they were heading back up the stairs and into Steve’s bedroom. Once inside, Billy whirled Steve around and pinned him against the door, kissing him hard and letting his hands wander, knowing that this was the quickest way to get him ready to go. Normally, he’d take his time with foreplay, but today, he didn’t have time for that. 

“Baby?” He asked once he knew he had him worked up just enough, “Since I get to be in control today, will you let me dress you up a little?”

“If that’s what you want, babe,” Steve sighed, and Billy was surprised he gave in so easily. Steve normally wasn’t one to do that, but every so often he’d put on a special outfit or costume to make Billy happy. He was just glad he didn’t put up as much of a fight as he usually did.

“Good,” Billy grinned, “I already had it picked out for you.” 

Steve nodded and smiled back as Billy led him over to the bed, where a lacy white lingerie set with little blue bows was all laid out and ready for him. Billy had to hide his rueful grin as he saw Steve’s face flush, glad to know he was getting to him already. Even when Steve did dress up for him, he never wore anything like this, anything girly, and if he hadn’t just said Billy could dress him up before he knew what he’d be wearing, he probably never would’ve. But it was too late to back out now, so he did his best to push aside his pride and let him start dressing him. 

It didn’t take long to get him all done up, and Billy beamed with pride as he saw Steve sit in front of him, decked out in lace panties, a bralette, sheer stockings and a garter to keep them up. Steve had even let him put mascara on his eyelashes. He was so ready to throw him down and defile the cutesy little display before him, but he held off, instead getting the silk ropes he’d bought last week and instructing Steve to hold his hands behind his back so he could start binding him. He followed the little pamphlet of instructions that came with the ropes to tie his hands, then moved on to his legs, helping him into a kneeling position and tying the ropes so that his thighs and calves were together, leaving him no way to move his legs. He had just finished tying the final knots when he heard the door open and close downstairs, and he grinned again as he went to get the final touch that would turn this picture into a masterpiece. It was a little blue satin hair bow, the same color as the bows on the lingerie, and Billy’s smile only grew as he stuck it in Steve’s hair.

“You look so sweet, baby,” he cooed, loving the way he blushed, “Just like a little doll.”

“What was that?” Steve asked, having heard the door, too. 

“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” he smiled, standing up and leaving him bound and helpless on the bed. “I invited some friends over to play with us.”

Upon saying it, the bedroom door opened, and Eddie and Jonathan walked in, smug smiles on both of their faces as they saw the scene before them. Although they’d known for weeks what to expect when they first walked in, neither of them had been fully prepared for the real thing. Their imaginations had been running wild for days, but they never could’ve dreamed up the shocked and slightly frightened expression on Steve’s face. It made him look even more like a little doll, and the idea that they were going to get to ruin him like this was more exciting than they could’ve imagined.

“Damn, Bill, had I known this was what we were missing, I’d have suggested this a long time ago,” Eddie said, sauntering over to the bed and flicking Steve’s nose. He wrinkled it up in response and scoffed, rolling his eyes like a little brat.

“What do you mean you suggested this? Billy, what the hell is going on?” Steve asked, glaring at Eddie until he realized Billy wasn’t answering him. He turned his head and audibly gasped, his jaw hanging open as he saw his boyfriend with his tongue down another man’s throat. He and Jonathan were making out like their lives depended on it, their hands all over each other, removing their shirts and touching everywhere, as if the others weren’t even in the room. Steve tried to look away, but Eddie grabbed his face and made him watch, chuckling darkly as he saw how it affected him. He had already been hard from earlier, but now it was noticeable, and his entire body looked flushed from a mix of embarrassment, jealousy and arousal. It was so cute to see him so helpless, and Eddie had to physically hold himself back from doing anything more than just holding him in place. This was a punishment, after all, he couldn’t let his own desires ruin things before Steve learned his lesson.

Pretty soon, though, Jonathan let Billy go, and he switched places with Eddie, settling himself behind Steve on the bed. He used one hand to hold his face in place like Eddie had, and started running the other over his chest, toying with him as they watched the other two make out.

“So, Stevie, how does it feel to know that I’ve taken another one of your partners right out from under you?” Jonathan whispered in his ear, leaning down to press his bare chest against his back. “It’s pretty hot, isn’t it?” Steve didn’t answer, only squirmed against him, and while it was titillating to know he was getting to him, it wasn’t the answer he wanted. “Isn’t it?” He repeated, his tone sharper this time, and he accentuated it by pinching his nipple through the bralette, making him jerk and huff before finally answering.

“Fuck! Fine, yes, it’s hot!” He grumbled, his skin feeling even hotter as he watched Billy and Eddie laugh at his pain. They were coming over to the bed now, losing their pants on the way, and sat in front of Steve, Jonathan moving to join them. Once he was there, they picked up right where they left off, putting on a sordid show of working each other up. Steve was still having trouble forming words as he watched them, jealousy and arousal still battling for dominance in his mind as they massaged each other’s dicks and marked each other with hickeys.

“Fuck, Eddie baby, that feels so good,” Billy groaned as Eddie spat in his hand and started to stroke him, Jonathan working overtime to bite and suck a hickey into his neck. 

“You sound so sexy when you moan my name,” Eddie grinned, continuing to pump his fist as Jonathan joined in. 

Billy smiled as they worked, continuing to moan and putting on a big show. He was never very vocal during sex, not after years of having to be silent just to jerk off without alerting anyone else in his house, but all that was going out the window now as he played it up, letting himself enjoy the sensations coursing through his body and not thinking twice. And it wasn’t hard to enjoy it. Jon and Eddie were actually really good at this, and it wasn’t long before he finally came, just as Steve finally managed to find his tongue.

“Um, hello? Is anyone gonna tell me what the hell is happening? Why are you two all over my boyfriend? And why are you just letting them touch you like that?!” He asked, clearly trying to move his hands around, but he couldn’t. 

“Because you’re a bratty little bitch that needs to be put in his place,”Jonathan said, surprising all the others at how boldly he was speaking. “You need to learn what the consequences are if you’re gonna act like a whore all the fuckin’ time.”

“Uh, yeah, what he said,” Billy chimed in after a moment, still surprised at how the usually quiet and shy boy had completely flipped his attitude.

“What? You guys aren’t making any sense,” Steve pouted.

“Let me put it to you this way,” Eddie said, smirking and grabbing a corner of the blanket to clean off his hand, “You’ve been laying it on us thick to try and get under Billy’s skin and he was tired of it, and I suggested we give you a taste of your own medicine, so we cooked up this little scheme. Clever, huh?”

“And you just went along with this?!” Steve asked, turning his attention to Billy. “I seriously can’t believe you. This is practically cheating!”

“Oh, and what you were doing wasn’t?” Billy threw back, “You never passed up an opportunity to flirt with Eddie and Jon, especially after you knew it bothered me! At least all this is fake, it was all planned out just to bug you. When you would flirt with them, you clearly meant it!”

“Well...okay, fair point, but still! At least it was never physical!” 

“You would literally make up excuses to cuddle up to us,” Jon said, rolling his eyes. “Besides, you’re being such a baby about this. It was just a handjob.”

“Jonny’s right, it really isn’t that big a deal. Especially since humiliating you and pissing you off was only the first part of the plan,” Eddie said, biting his lip. He looked Steve over slowly, taking him in fully before starting to crawl towards him, the other two following suit until he was surrounded. They all loomed over him, their eyes full of lust and wicked smiles stretched over their faces, ready to pounce. Steve’s eyes widened at first, like he was afraid for a moment, until Billy ran his hand through his hair, and he realized he wasn’t in any danger, just a bit of trouble. 

After that, it was a free for all. Jonathan, Eddie and Billy were all over Steve, just like they’d been with each other. Any bit of him they could get at, they were there, touching, kissing, teasing, whatever they could do to elicit a response from him. Steve felt like the breath was knocked out of him when they attacked, and he was still struggling to get it back as they moved him however they wanted him. He closed his eyes as he began to feel overwhelmed, but it felt strangely freeing, and it was definitely turning him on. He was loving all the attention, and just as he was starting to show it, suddenly, they stopped altogether. He groaned in frustration as his eyes shot open and he glared at them, breathing heavily as he tried to ask them why they stopped, but his voice once again eluded him.

“What, did you think your punishment was over just because we started touching you?” Billy teased, tweaking his nose, which he knew he hated. “Oh, no, sweetheart, that was just to get you hard again. That’s what’s so fun about this. It’s not about what we can do for you, it’s about what we can do for ourselves by using you, and maybe we’ll give you some relief once we’re done.”

“So, are you gonna be a good little slut for us?” Jonathan asked, grabbing Steve’s face again, hard, and waiting. Steve didn’t know what to say, though, and he got impatient. He rolled his eyes again and spit into his still open mouth, then held it closed and asked again, “I said, are you going to be a good slut?”

This time, Steve nodded eagerly, seeming to come out of a trance as he swallowed hard and opened his mouth again. He wasn’t used to acting like this, usually he was the one in control, but it was like a switch had been flipped, and now, all he could think about was being treated like nothing more than an object, like he had no purpose but to make sure he satisfied everyone else in the room. 

“Good boy,” Jonathan smiled, finally letting go of his face and looking at the other two. They nodded, and helped him move Steve so that he was kneeling on the floor, looking up at them with curiosity in his eyes. He waited patiently as they moved around him, Jonathan kneeling behind him, Billy in front, and Eddie standing to the side, all looking at him like he was a piece of meat and they were hungry wolves. 

Finally, once they were settled around him, they pounced, Jon and Billy tearing at the panties he was wearing until they ripped them off, and Eddie grabbing his head and holding it to his crotch, making it clear what he wanted from him. Steve yelped at the sudden movement, but quickly composed himself and got to work, taking Eddie’s dick in his mouth and starting to suck. He loved the feeling of a big, heavy cock in his mouth, and he let that show clearly on his face as he worked his lips and tongue, barely even registering the sound of someone spitting into their hand. He didn’t even think about it until he felt Jonathan’s spit-slick member prodding at his ass, and he froze for a moment, much to Eddie’s annoyance. It’s not like he’d never had anything in his ass, but it had been a while, and with no prep beforehand, he knew it was gonna hurt a little bit until he got used to it. But he had no time to think about it, as an entirely different kind of pain exploded across his face when Eddie slapped him, hard. 

“I never said you could stop,” he growled, grabbing Steve by the hair and forcing him to keep going. Steve was still trying to get caught up on everything that was happening, but he let Eddie move him however he wanted, tears springing to his eyes as he shoved all the way down his throat and held him there until he choked. 

He was so overwhelmed, especially as Billy finally joined in, too, spitting in his hand and starting to spread it over Steve’s dick, but he couldn’t say he wasn’t enjoying this. It was rough, it hurt, he’d probably be feeling it for the next week at least, but it felt so good. He loved the way his brain was starting to shut off, the only things functioning being his nerves so that he could focus solely on the way his body felt. He felt like a live wire, ready to crackle and explode at any second, especially when Jonathan finally thrust inside of him without warning and Billy turned around and started fucking himself in his lap.

“Fuck, you’re a tight little tramp, aren’t you?” Jon groaned, grabbing onto Steve’s hips to help keep him still as he fucked into him. He couldn’t answer with Eddie still using his throat, but he whined as his eyes rolled back, and that seemed to be enough. Jon smacked his ass and got another whine out of him, and he must’ve loved that noise, because he kept doing it until his entire asscheek was covered in big red handprints. 

“If you want tight, you should feel his throat,” Eddie sighed, holding Steve’s head down again. He had mascara running all over his face and spit dribbling down his chin, his hair was messed up and his skin was reddened wherever he’d been hit. He looked like a slutty renaissance painting, and felt like a dream.

“Yeah, he’s always been like that, always thought it made him less of a man if I was the one who fucked him,” Billy panted, continuing to bounce on his dick. “At least his fragile little ego is kinda paying off right now.”

“Fuck, yeah, it really is,” Eddie said, “I’m about to come right down his little fucking whore throat.”

“Same,” Jonathan grunted, smacking Steve’s ass again, “I’m gonna blow my load so deep in you, you’re gonna be able to taste it.”

“God, you really are not beating the ‘freak’ allegations, are you?” Billy chuckled, loving the way he blushed when he turned his head to look at him. “Heh. Never change, Jonny.”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” he mumbled as his blush grew brighter, but so did his smile, and finally, after a few more thrusts, he was gone. He cried out as he came inside Steve, fucking him through it until he felt like he’d faint if he didn’t pull out. He fell back against the bed and watched as Eddie came soon after, holding Steve’s head down to his hips until he’d emptied his balls, making him choke yet again as he filled his mouth with jizz. It was so much that, even though Steve swallowed most of it down, some still came out from between his lips and ran down his face, falling onto his chest and making his chest hair a sticky, matted mess. 

Steve’s body was still reeling from the loss of sensation when Billy got off of him, too, leaving him empty and still on the verge of orgasm. He hadn’t been able to say anything about it, but he’d been close, too, and now that none of them were currently touching him, it was like being yanked back from a ledge. Suddenly, he could feel everything going on in his body he hadn’t noticed before, his sticky, tear-crusted face, his aching, half-numb legs, his tired, heavy arms, and his desperate, weeping cock. It was like being plunged into an ice bath, a shock to the system, and as soon as his throat was clear, he was going to beg them to let him come, too. 

Before he could even get two words out, though, Billy was standing in front of him, pumping his cock fast and hard, just like he liked, until he was spilling all over his boyfriend’s face and hair. He knew he’d catch hell for that as soon as Steve could talk again, but right now, he didn’t care. It felt so good to ruin him, to put him in his place, and that made it all worth it.

As soon as he’d stepped back to sit down and admire their hard work, Billy saw a flash go off, and turned to see Jonathan standing in front of Steve again, this time with his camera in hand. He chuckled again and said, “Yeah, absolutely never gonna be beating those allegations.”

“What, you’re telling me you don’t want to be able to see him like this anytime you want?” Jon retorted, and Billy just shrugged. He had a point.

“As long as we all get a copy,” Eddie said, coming back into the room with a wet washcloth from the bathroom. Nobody had even noticed him leaving, but they were glad he had as they cleaned themselves up, just as Steve finally managed to speak up from his spot on the floor.

“I know you wanted to punish me or whatever,” he said, his voice absolutely wrecked, “But you’re not seriously gonna leave me hanging, are you?” 

“Depends,” Billy said, grinning like a shark, “Did you learn your lesson?”

“Depends,” he smiled back, “If I say no, are you going to try again?”

“You really are a little whore,” Billy said, but his smile never faltered. “Fine, I guess if it didn’t work this time, we can always try and get through to you on another day. For now, boys, help me get him on the bed.”

Eddie and Jonathan did as they were told and helped Billy pick Steve up and get him on the bed. Billy untied him so he could stretch his legs and arms and then they were on him again, Jon and Eddie each holding one of his legs up and Billy sitting in front of him, teasing him just a little bit more with his fingers around his rim before shoving them inside. He started with two, then three, and fucked him with his hand until Steve was a writhing, moaning mess beneath them, crying out as more tears ran down his face and he came all over himself. He was still breathing heavily as they let his legs down and helped him sit up, letting him get ahold of himself before they helped him to the shower and let him clean up. 

“So, do you think he’ll actually learn from this or what?” Jon asked as they got back to the bedroom and started getting dressed.

“Knowing him, probably not, but that just means we get to do this again,” Eddie said, “Right, Bill?”

The sun was just beginning to set over Hawkins, Indiana when Billy Hargrove left his house in a huff, heading for his car. He fought the urge to groan as he heard the front door locking behind him, knowing that it’d be a few hours before his dad even considered letting him back inside, so he figured he might as well go for a drive and maybe get a burger at the diner or something. It was only after he got to his car door that he realized he’d left his keys inside on his desk, and thus was not going to get far. He finally allowed himself to let the groan out, shifting his energy to fighting the urge to kick his tires. It wouldn’t do him any good, so what was the point? At least it was pretty warm out, despite it only being the first of March, and he still had his wallet on him, so he could just walk to the diner if he cut through the woods behind his house. The walk would do him good, anyway, and it’d give him a chance to calm down a little, too. So with one last annoyed sigh, he left his car and headed for the small patch of trees just beyond the backyard. 

He didn’t know exactly how far the diner was from here, at least while he was walking, but the roads out of his neighborhood took him in this direction, so he figured it couldn’t be too far. Besides, he’d been able to explore most of this town already, but he hadn’t done much exploring around his own house, so he didn’t know what was behind the trees back here. Maybe there would be something interesting, or at least another good spot to hide out if this ever happened again and he’d need a place to hide out from his dad but didn’t have his keys. Either way, he could kill time finding out. 

It only took about five minutes of walking before he reached the edge of the treeline, the sun lighting up more of the path he was walking and a big, empty field coming into view. Most of the grass was still dead from the cold, wet winter that was just coming to an end, and there really wasn’t much to it, only a few small buildings on the far side of the field, hidden from the view of the road by more trees and houses. It was almost like its own little bubble of the world, almost completely hidden unless you knew what you were looking for or happened to stumble upon it. Billy had certainly never known it existed until now, and he wondered if many of the people in the town did, or if some of them would go their whole lives never knowing it was here. 

He continued on through the field, heading towards the buildings on the far side, and after coming over a short hill, he saw the break in the trees and the tiny gravel parking lot just beyond the buildings, and the small patch of dirt between two of the buildings with a bit of fencing between them. It was a tiny baseball field, more a simple sandlot than an actual field, but nevertheless. Clearly it had been left dormant for the winter, and they’d probably start cleaning it up and doing maintenance on it next month to get it ready for the new season in May, if anybody still played here anymore. He knew the high school team didn’t, they had their own fields out behind the school, and even the elementary school had their own field, and he couldn’t imagine either team ever giving those up to play here. 

As he got closer, he saw the third building just off to the right of the field must’ve been a concessions stand, the metal door and window cover both locked up for now, and a few pieces of old playground equipment just behind it. The paint on the equipment was chipping, allowing the rust to show through, and the paint on the dugouts wasn’t fairing much better. It was chipped and faded, and he could only barely read what it said on each structure, ‘home’ and ‘visiting’. The little field didn’t even have proper bleachers, only a few steps carved out of the earth with wood planks and some cement anchoring them in place. It was a pretty sad sight, and Billy was ready to walk right past it, but then he saw something even sadder; someone sitting alone inside the ‘home’ dugout, just staring out at the field with a blank expression. And not just any someone. It was Steve Harrington.

Billy knew he could’ve just kept on walking, but he didn’t. He stopped when he saw the other boy and just watched for a second, debating whether he should go over and say something or just leave the other boy alone. He didn’t look like he wanted any company right then, and Billy knew what that was like, but he also had an intense interest in him, he wanted to know what made him tick. So finally, he headed towards the dugout, stepped through the doorway, and took a seat next to him on the old wooden bench.

“What are you doing here, Harrington?” He asked, noting how he didn’t even acknowledge it when he sat right next to him. 

“I could ask you the same thing,” Steve mumbled, his voice sounding a little rough, like he was sick or something.

“I was just out for a walk, had to get out of the house,” Billy shrugged. Steve nodded, but didn’t say anything else, just sighed as he continued to stare out at the field. He looked so upset, almost defeated, and Billy wanted so badly to ask why, but he never got the chance.

“I used to play tee ball here,” Steve said after a few minutes, sighing as he crossed his arms and leaned forward. “My team was called the Fireballs. I was number three. We kinda sucked.”

Steve paused, scrubbing his hands over his face and sighing again as he tried to figure out what else to say. He and Billy weren’t exactly friends, they were barely civil, but still, it might be nice to have someone else to rant to, especially after what had happened earlier. He was getting nowhere when he was trying to figure it out himself. Maybe an outside perspective was exactly what he needed. 

“Yeah, we sucked. We were so bad. I hated it, but… I kinda wish I could go back,” he said, his gaze finally shifting from the field to his shoes. He still didn’t look at Billy, but it was something. 

“Why would you want to go back if you hated it?” Billy asked, remembering his own time on the diamond, how his father had insisted he play for years, and only let him give it up after he'd failed to make a single hit in an entire season. He wouldn’t go back to that for a million dollars.

“It was just easier then,” Steve said, shaking his head. “I didn’t have to worry about anything. My biggest worry was if I would be stuck out in the outfield again and if I had remembered to bring a nickel with me to get a piece of bubblegum between innings. Now everything is so complicated and I just wish I could go back to when it wasn’t.”

“What’s so complicated about your life now? I mean, you got money, a nice big house, a fancy car, some good friends, and that’s a hell of a lot more than a lot of other people have,” Billy said, regretting it a little bit when Steve finally looked at him with a harsh glare. “I just mean it can’t be all that hard for you to get ahead in the world with all those things going for you.”

“Yeah, well, those things don’t mean jack shit when they aren’t really yours,” he said.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean I don’t have money, my parents do. Same with the house. The car is technically mine, but I have to pay them back for it, they didn’t just give it to me. And in case you hadn’t noticed, all my so-called ‘friends’ kicked me to the curb as soon as you came along, and only still talk to me because of who I used to be. And none of these things is permanent. As soon as I turn eighteen and graduate, I have three options: go to college, which I’m too stupid for anyway, join the military, or move out and get a ‘real’ job. My parents are already pressuring me to make a decision and I still have a whole half a school year left before I have to, but every other conversation is them reminding me to fill out applications or that there’s an opening at my dad’s firm and ‘it could be such a wonderful opportunity for you, Stephen!’. And when they’re not trying to be nice about it, they just keep reminding me of my sister and how they treated her when she didn’t want to live the life they tried to push on her and implying they’ll do the same to me.”

“I didn’t know you had a sister. What happened to her?” Billy asked, shivering as a breeze started to blow across the field. The sun was about halfway gone by now, and as it dropped, so did the temperature. It was still okay for now, but he just hoped the wind wouldn’t get any stronger before he was allowed back inside his house.

“I have two, actually. Simona is the oldest, and she went along with everything mom and dad wanted her to. She was always the perfect, obedient little sweetheart that could do no wrong, and that’s what our parents expected out of all of us. And don’t get me wrong, I love my sister, but sometimes I wish she would’ve been a little bit more rebellious when she was my age, because then maybe Angelina and I wouldn’t be held to such high standards.” 

Steve explained, shifting so that he was sitting back again, but instead of staring at the field now, he turned to look at Billy, “See, Simona didn’t just listen to my parents, she learned how to do what they wanted without them even having to ask. She graduated top of her class and went to college straight away and is trying to become a lawyer, following in the old man’s footsteps. She got married last summer and immediately got pregnant because mom was saying how much she wanted grandkids. Mona had told me and Angie she was going to wait until she was out of school to have kids, but that mom reminded her how much more difficult it could be if she waited until she was older, so she changed her mind. She’s only twenty three, she had plenty of time, but she knew my mom wanted grandkids, so she gave her a grandkid. And because she’s like that, Angie and I have been hearing our whole lives, ‘why can’t you be more like your sister?’.”

“Wait, I don’t get it. I thought they didn’t want you to be like your sister,” Billy said.

“They don’t. When they say that, they’re talking about Angie. She was the complete opposite of Mona, never just doing what she was told, always needing to know why she was doing anything, and questioning everything, including our parent’s authority. She pushed boundaries and if she didn’t agree with something, she just simply didn’t do it, or found a way around it. She didn’t agonize over grades or making my parents happy, she only worried about making herself happy. In her mind, it didn’t matter if she got a C, as long as she passed the test, what was the difference between that and an A? Or, if her room was a mess, why should she clean it if she was the only one who was going to be in there? And if you wanted to come in that badly, you could deal with the mess. And she was always artsy, and if she ever did have a career that she went for, it would most likely be something like painting or design, not something like business or law. My parents hated that. They tried everything to, in their words, ‘fix her’, but Angie was too strong willed, and she told them that their efforts were futile, she wasn’t going to fit in their mold, ever,” Steve sighed, starting to bite at his lips.

“So what happened?” Billy asked, shivering again as another gust of wind blew by.

“As soon as she turned eighteen and graduated, they threw her out. They told her never to come back unless she’d straightened herself out, and they meant it. It’s been three years, and I’ve only seen her a handful of times, and only because we missed each other and set something up, not because my parents would let her come home for Christmas or something. It was so bad that Mona almost didn’t invite her to her wedding because of what happened, but I finally convinced her to. It was the one and only time that she didn’t do what my parents wanted because she wanted the opposite. And I mean, Angie’s doing okay for herself. She’s living in Chicago and found a job at a tattoo parlor. She still paints and she sells her work at flea markets and street fairs, and does commission work on the side. She says she’s happier than she ever was at home, and that’s great, I’m happy for her, but I don’t know how she managed to do it, how she even knew where to start picking herself back up. I probably couldn’t do it, I wouldn’t know what to do. I didn’t even know what to do today after I stormed out, that’s how I ended up here.”

Steve rubbed his hands over his face again as he finished explaining, leaning forward again and shaking his head. He was tired, he just wanted to go home, but he knew he couldn’t. It would be like admitting defeat, and he wasn’t about to do that just yet. At least the weight on his shoulders was starting to feel a little lighter now that he’d been able to talk to someone about it all. There was still more to be said, but he wasn’t about to unload all of it at once.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better,” Billy said after a few moments, “At least you had the balls to stand up to your parents, even if it was just during an argument. I can’t even do that, I just wait until my dad leaves me alone and then I leave, so you’re doing better than I am.”

“It was the first time I ever really did that,” Steve admitted, biting at his lips again. “Usually I just take it and nod along until they realize I’m not really listening and then they drop it, but tonight I just… I just snapped. I screamed at them and stormed out and now I don’t know what to do.”

“Do what I do. Wait until they cool down and then go home once you know they’re asleep or about to be. They won’t bring the fight back up if they’re already in bed, so you don’t have to worry about it at least until the morning,” Billy shrugged, trying his best to make him feel better. He knew how scary it could be after storming out for the first time. He’d had years of experience, might as well put it to good use.

“I can’t go home tonight. This fight was worse than all the others. They went on their normal tirades about my future and all that, but then they took it a step further and started in on me about my social life and shit and that’s what made me blow up. They were making all kinds of judgements and assumptions about me and they were way off base, but if I went home tonight, it’d be like telling them they were right, and I’m not gonna do that because they aren’t.”

“My dad does that shit, too,” Billy sighed, looking at the sun that was almost completely gone now before asking, “What were they saying?” 

“They started by saying how I was so antisocial now, basically their way of calling me a loser, and asking what happened to all my friends? And I just ignored that, but then they went on and asked what ever happened to ‘that nice Wheeler girl’ and how I should’ve tried harder to make that work because she was such a sweet thing and how could I have let her go? And I told them that she broke up with me and then slept with another guy like not even a full week later, but they still blamed me for it anyway,” Steve said, getting a little fired up as he spoke. “That’s when I stormed out. I didn’t want to hear the rest, about how a good woman could totally change my life and how a big family is the biggest fulfillment and the best accomplishment I could ever hope for and blah, blah, blah. And listen, I do still love Nancy, but only as a friend, and even if I could get her back, I wouldn’t want to. She’s nice, but if I were being honest, the only reason I really went after her in the first place is because that’s what people expected of me. I earned a reputation as a ladies' man in middle school just because I was friends with a lot of girls and the rumors started that I was only friends with them because I wanted something from them and that couldn’t have been further from the truth. But that’s what people believed, so that became the truth. The real truth is, I have a very specific type, and most girls just do not fit into it. But I can’t tell most people that, and especially not my parents, or they wouldn’t even wait until I graduated, they’d throw me out on my ass then and there.”

“I think I get what you’re saying,” Billy said, pulling his jacket tighter around him.

“No you don’t. You couldn’t. I don’t think anybody in this town could.”

“Maybe not, but don’t forget, I’m not from here. Believe me, I know exactly what you’re going through. I’ve got a ‘specific type’, too.”

“You? Really?” Steve couldn’t help but chuckle. “I never would’ve guessed.”

“Yeah, but that’s the point. If anyone could, not only would my dad throw me out, he’d probably kill me,” Billy shrugged again. Steve nodded, and they both went quiet again, staring back out at the field as the last light from the sun stretched above the horizon, the indigo sky fighting to push it down and bathe everything in darkness. When it finally won out, Billy sighed again and stood up, stretching and putting his hands in his pockets as he turned back to Steve.

“So, listen,” he started, picking at a seam inside his pocket, “I was on my way to the diner before I found you here and since it’s not far and I’m still kinda starving, do you want to come with me? We can grab a bite and then maybe figure out a place for you to go tonight instead of having to go home.”

It seemed to take a moment for the words to register in Steve’s head, because for a moment, he just looked at Billy, assessing him as if trying to figure out how a magic trick was done. But finally, after a second, he nodded.

“That sounds nice, thanks,” he said, his voice a bit quieter than before, but he smiled a little bit and stood up, following Billy out of the dugout and across the field towards the parking lot. 

“Oh, and here,” Billy said, pulling a small tube of cherry chapstick from his pocket and offering it to Steve, hoping the darkness would hide the way his face began to burn. “You kept biting your lips up in there. This should help.”