pull the plug

I had to dress up so my son's dad and I could eat lunch with our son. It's one of the last things we did together. I've started occasionally going to orthodontist appointments, but I don't want to seem like a burden to anyone. Hmmm...

I wish I didn't keep writing about you. I feel so alone. I wish I could make you see through my eyes. Would you still hate me if you knew the guilt I carry? How much I hate myself? Do you think you'll ever care? Why?? Why won't you just level with me? I want to know if you love me. I'm going to know that. You're going to let me know. And I want you to be happy, no matter fucking what. Bcause I do love you. And, seeing you happy has become such a good thing to see. I worry about you so much. You know that though. For some reason, I think You know I worry about you. I hope one day you read this, no, I hope you never do. Let's spend another 5 years dancing around and being miserable. And I will. Won't I?

Uggh... I still want him. I hate it so bad. Make it stop.

Years ago, there used to be journaling sites like Xanga and LiveJournal. I hadn't ever thought about using this site in the same manner. I mean, no one I know gets on here, I could at least feel like I'm getting some of this crap out of my head. So... Even if no one is reading, I think I'm going to be posting more often, and more personally. Guess you will either like it or not.

The Last Lost Continent by La Dispute

why do boys say they love you when they clearly don't?

Edit your hometown. Get away.

Bathroom selfies that I Snapchat to no one.