apathy's a tragedy

my fatal flaw is that if i don't want to do something i just won't do it like mama raised a quitter for sure.. i'll be doing something and suddenly be like damn what if i just didn't 🤔. very freeing but also i suffer so many consequences

I hate when I get two problems in a row. They’re all gonna think I’m making it up.

It doesn’t matter if you’re gay, weird or stupid. You matter.

what happens if im all 3?

All three??

Really?

What if water didn't have surface tension and whenever you spilled some, the whole floor of your entire apartment was covered in a 2 micrometer deep puddle

you've taught me to count blessings I didn't know were mine

if you shot me with a gun id pribably be pretty mad but due to my laconic and forgetful nature i bet we could still be friends

breakfast of 2.5 coffees and a loose handful of very sour candy my body is going to invent a fifth humor

i think draiwng images is impossible and everyone is playing some kind of tricks

To have the highest incarceration per capita rate in the world, Vatican City would need to imprison 13 people.

if you ask me, the guy who put the sword INTO the stone should be king, not the chucklefuck who got it out.

I assume the guy who put the "sword that makes you the king" into the stone, doesn't really want the position

i think the stone should be king since it held the sword the longest