Dream boy

stop saying old man yaoi about 30 year olds. old man yaoi requires at least one viagra in the mix

my main goal in life is genuinely just to have a good day

five year plan? have a good day. plans this weekend? have a good day. why i’m doing what i’m doing? bc i wanna have a good day. it is all about having a good day. nothing’s as precious as the present moment. neither the past nor the future. therefore i will make sure to spend it having a good day

Yeah, a lot of what bothers me about fantasy settings (especially D&D) is that people try to run wizards like they're academics, but their only exposure to academics is authoritative professors telling them The Truth, so they don't realize that all academics are always 5 seconds away from trying to strangle each other over questions like 'does time really pass or does it just seem to pass'

*touching his extremely defined six pack* who did this to you.....

*gently lifting a cup of water to his lips* it's going to be okay. *choking back tears* just a few more sips and then we'll get you a sandwich...

extremely unsexy of adhd to make me both very annoying and very sensitive to the concept of being perceived as annoying

(trying to win the masses over) imagine how easy a booty call would be in a walkable city

everybody loves stabbing as a sign of homoerotic longing. but when I, Brutus,

i just remembered a story my first plug told me. she's butch and gets mistaken for a man a lot. one time she was walking home when a guy pulled a knife on her and asked for everything in her pockets. panicking, she said "ok" and the guy hearing her voice was like "oh shit, are you a girl?" and she was like "yeah" and he put the knife away and said something like "sorry. i can't do this to a woman" and left. feminist ally.

it's a tragedy i couldn't find this post in time for international women's day. happy belated women's day to this guy.

i would make an excellent goon. i’d be like ”on it boss” and then i’d fuck it up instantly.