Snuffles World

Layering my Short Skirt, Long Jacket (CAKE) over my White Tee (CORPSE) and Blue Jeans (Lana Del Ray) Knee Socks (Arctic Monkeys) and Blue Suede Shoes (Elvis) and then putting on my Raspberry Beret (Prince) before I head out to the Bard Olympics where I am disqualified for performance-enhancing power buffs. On my way home I am cast as a sassy but cute side character in an early 2010's Disney Channel original series. I look fresh as hell

I guess that makes you a Sharp Dressed Man (ZZ Top)

*finger guns*

can I get a job as an editor but the only thing I do is correct when someone uses the word "prone" when they mean "supine"

youd think a band named violent femmes would be made up of violent femmes. but it isnt. its dudes

youse may bloody reckon a band name of violent femmes'd be a buncha sheilas after a couple bundy cokes. but it aint. packa blokes.

i have been informed by literally every french speaker on earth that “une pipe” is slang for blowjob

i love explaining the etymology of the word "rickroll" because the story starts with "ok, so at one point 4chan applied a filter to everyone's posts that changed the word egg to duck"

No I think it's really great when a friend group of approximately twenty seven individuals spread out in the sidewalk as they walk so nobody has to walk behind the group. There's nothing better than when I'm trying to get home and I see the tableau of Jesus at the Last Supper gliding towards me like Jamiroquai in the Virtual Insanity music video and I have to decide who has the narrowest frame that I can shoulder-check my way past