Bizarre & Unmarketable @smittyjaws - Tumblr Blog

So I'm gonna try and start uploading stuff to ko-fi :3

It's been a hot minute but I'm gonna put more of my stuff on here and my other socials

Support Bee Nyx

#SUPPORT THEIR ART #it’s good shit man #signal boost

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monarchetype

My aunt and her roommate on their way back from evening Jazzercise at the local YMCA

#huge goddamn mood #the who

mag-madness

When I was scared of the dark as a child, my dad comforted me by saying, "There's nothing in the dark, that doesn't already exist when the are lights on."

He explained that I wasn't scared when the lights were on so I didn't have any reason to be scared when they turned off. My bed was still my bed, my cupboard was the same cupboard, etc.

Now as an adult, that line chills me to my bones because I've watched and read too many horror stories. "There's nothing in the dark that wasn't already there in the light," now makes me think of the false sense of security we have just because a light is on, like a child hiding under a blanket.

#huge goddamn mood

slimetony

hey guys im making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap wake me up in 5 minutes so i can flip them over

guddram-deactivated20180109

Randy its been five minutes flip your sticks

slimetony

snnnnzzzzz

guddram-deactivated20180109

#RANDY YOUR STICKS!!!!!!!!!!

effinbirds

#huge goddamn mood #effinbirds

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theelusiveemily-deactivated2024

are you hoes on lol mode yet ?

#shitpost

silverslipstream

worst part about the Internet is knowing that there are finally people who both match and complement your freak. the nearest one is 2,318.4 miles away and your time zones are awkward

wyrmcat

sentientsky

HEAD IN MY HANDS

smittyjaws

@thecreechur

#huge goddamn mood #😔💅

lowpolyanimals

Mr Gold from Brother Hai's Pho Restaurant

#SHAPED

badkidsjokes

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BALD MAN WITH A BUTT HEADED FACE? The answer is butt man

#HILARIOUS #shitpost

depsidase

#shitpost

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no-more-dead-dogs

hey girl, are you (be cool and edgy) a gun (but not too edgy!) because you're pretty (great job, you've fucked this up already no going back) and i want you in my mouth? (say something british now, that never fails) tally-ho!

no-more-dead-dogs

"ohhh this post is so harry du bois" "this post reminds me of jake english" this post is a direct quote that i said to a handsome man at the local gas station a few months ago. i said this. me.

#shitpost

burr-ell

YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN HANDLE CRITIQUE. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN EMBRACE BEING TOLD YOU WERE WRONG. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH UNPLEASANT TASKS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN DELIVER DISAPPOINTING NEWS. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU KNOW HOW TO BE DISAGREED WITH. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE CORRECTED. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU CAN BE TOLD YOU MESSED UP. YOU ARE A REGULAR GUY. YOU ARE ABLE TO DO HARD THINGS.

#huge goddamn mood #reminder to self

akashicrecord

Liberals act like a man putting his beebo in another man's stinky is attractive or even legal. Traditional alphas know the only place a man should be sticking his beebo is his wife's candy/lala. Maybe SOMETIMES her stinky. if she's never farted or poopied. #Facts

teethunderteeth

Me forcing his beebo into my lala...for...squibby times 😈 #squibby

#shitpost

radiofreederry

allgremlinyaps

#EVERYONE WANTS WHAT 1966 BATMAN HAD #SURFING JOKER IS WHAT WE DESERVE #batman 1966

amazoogle

i set my name to Paul Enis in the app because then the stickers they put on my grocery deliveries would say P. ENIS. it was like this for months, but now all the sudden they say PAUL E. instead

i can't have that. i won't let that happen. what they could have never predicted is that a beautiful woman named Peni Sausage is about to log on

#shitpost

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Anya is LIVE right now

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