Catch Me Dead On The Forrest Floor @skelextor - Tumblr Blog

*wakes from coma* Fuck *walks to the nearest tree and starts punching it*

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everythingbutlarry-deactivated2

AU: President Obama falls for part white house intern part rockstar Harry Styles. Obama surprises Harry in the audience of one of his shows and the affair blossoms from there.

tsarcasm-deactivated20180922

Please get this off my dashboard right now immediately

airframeextender

this is the best post on this website

#this makes me think of echo because she loves harry styles #👀

valtsv

maybe you’d feel better if u stanned paddington

pics-that-make-you-go-hmm

#this is literally me #👀

fortuneaday

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whatbrodysaidtoday-deactivated2

Visit Original Link

Pale Blue Eyes - Hole

Hole’s cover of The Velvet Underground song.

mutant-radio

mpregcraig

Thank you for agreeing to take the Pre-Employment Assessment Test. Please answer all questions as truthfully as you can.

QUESTION 1: Your wife, the mother of your children, is drowning. You have a life preserver. However, a customer requires your assistance. What do you do?

QUESTION 2: A man has been caught stealing from the company and he is currently awaiting execution. You are the executioner. Do you pull the trigger?

QUESTION 3: Which sentence best describes yourself?

- I have clinical depression.

- I’m ready to be productive!

QUESTION 4: Which sentence best describes yourself?

- I try to do things to the best of ability.

- I am willing to bleed for you.

QUESTION 5: Are you afraid to die?

#this is like interviews at the library #except they also use medevil torture decives like the thumb biter and everything is situational #and even if i do exceptionally well they hire some idiot over me who i then grt to #work with who doesnt even know what an inter library loan is #but its fine! she might be stellar at customer service!#except she isnt and shes timid as a field mouse #i could beat lisa up in her sleep #be careful

jimhenson-themuppetmaster

Bert and Ernie with a Kitten, taken from a Magazine Article.

keanureevesimagines

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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thearenaat-deactivated20141104

rodnt

sigh…i came all the way to sephora but i don’t know which brands are asexual friendly….i have to hurry jugheads birthday is today…wish someone would help me out

chuckecheeses

Hi Sister Archie! James Charles here, might I suggest Too Faced Better Than Sex Mascara?

disaster-punk-deactivated202112

Me, being led to the guillotine: so, no head?

dopevader

post punk

#me as a mailman

valtsv

woman in a victorian novel: *develops a fever from worrying too much*

me, shivering and sweating with stress-induced anxiety: wtf that’s so unrealistic lol

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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pettydavis

straight ppl dont get to call us pillow biters and rug munchers and ass bandits and sodomites and faggot and d*** and every other disgusting name you can think of for a lesbian or gay person—for literal decades—and then try to call themselves tops and bottoms just cuz they like pegging like. im not doing it. im not allowing it

#sex mention #but also fucking true #im so tired of all these straight peoole saying theyre tops #like. please get a hobby

southernsideofme

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