I'm sorry every song's about you

when i was a kid i decided that killing people was bad therefore war was bad therefore the military was evil. and adults would tell me it's more nuanced than that and i would understand when i grew up. well i'm a grown up now and idk i still think that killing people is bad and war is bad and the military is evil

honestly given my parents whole [gestures vaguely] i am actually incredibly well adjusted

Crucially Norman Osborn didn’t need to do like any of what he did for basically any reason. Nobody needs to get on a hoverboard and throw pumpkins around, And least of all a middle aged father

probably feels good af to latch your jaws onto someone and not let go

they're putting me down tomorrow 😔

that fictional woman would NOT get pregnant.

Thank you divorce for all you've done for music

asked a student what their favorite animal was today and they said “a cheetah AND a sloth” and I said “wow smart, you’ve got both ends of the speed spectrum covered!” and they looked at me like I was the only sensible adult they’d ever spoken to