you feel like a prize

with no finish line in sight

because you’re all mine

the kind of victory

that never has to end

where every sunrise

is a trophy we win again

i don’t have to run

i don’t have to prove a thing

i just get to stay here

a surrender to truths i’ve been trying to hide

that i cannot be whole if i’m staying behind

all you do is pull

i want you more than anything

but my peace requires more

i’ve spent my spirit trying to bridge the gap

waiting for the day you’d meet me halfway

but love shouldn't feel like a constant debt

the world is a roar, a frantic hum

a thousand signals, a rhythmic drum

that beats too fast against my skin

and you haven’t noticed the stone

you think the silence is a truce

when it’s really just me, alone

you’re waiting for the fire to return

but you’re the one who killed the spark

and i’m too tired to teach you

where seeing the color, make and model

of your car

doesn’t make my heart skip a beat

when i think of you

i feel defeat

constrained

love i wish

i could give and recieve

every moment

a knot that i cannot yet mend

a wound too raw that refuses to end

but moments are fleeting

grief is just clay

i will shape it and smooth it away

simply a lesson of what matters the most

to stay away

i sank deeper

in love

while you were afloat

with no helping hand

watching me drown

the ending began

i became the anchor

a weight you let fall

a promise forgotten

ignored all of my calls

but when i resurfaced

i found myself free

no longer adrift

i’ll hold the moments we shared close to my heart

now it’s time to pick up the pieces

before i fall completely apart

the world keeps turning, indifferent to the pain

so clean and composed

as if the future you broke wasn't owed

i’m standing here, heavy and frail

you chose the low road

where decency fails

my strength is my shield

but it's wearing thin

a fortress of despair

locked me out

to face the storm alone

pouring rain on the windshield of my car

silence hangs within the air

a love neglected

turned hard as stone

i turn the key and listen to the engine hum

a tiny solace in this world so vast

hoping the morning light will surely come

it will only be my ghost you see

a shell of myself

for you to touch, but not feel

i polished the empty space where i stood

i broke every mirror that held your light.

the soft, warm creature you misunderstood

was extinguished, irrevocably, overnight

you will talk to the echoes where my heart resided

you will search for a fire that i let expire

the person you wounded, i wisely discarded,

and now i am glass, reflecting you

a gray rock, stone cold

numb when you lay beside me

the quiet victory of nothing left to lose

a silence that no touch can undo

feelings scattered like ash in the wind

i found freedom in letting the fire die

but you search for a warmth that has already been

in the hollow space where i learned how to lie alone

i only wished you’d notice the change

that the vessel you loved was completely empty

boundaries of my despair rearrange

but you pulling away excites me

beauty in being unwanted

the peace of being self-sufficient

there is a freedom in standing alone

a sturdy structure without support

where no fragile affection is to be shown

and the desperate wishing is brought to naught.

i am relieved of the burden of your gaze

the pressure to hold a shimmering line

i find my own worth in these empty days

the only thing that keeps me going is hope

hope that one day i will get it right

i keep going

step by step

and day by day

with consistency

the darkness slowly starts to recede

this patient planting

this slow, vital care

will grow a future from a tiny seed

and i will breathe the free and open air

a quiet triumph from this desperate need

until i could no longer

i fell for the delusion of your love

and the truth of my loneliness

i gave you my sun and my moon

and you gave me shadows to live in

i gave you a garden of my heart

you trampled the flowers, leaving only weeds in their wake

i fell for the delusion that you would see me and accept me

truly see me, and not just the version of me you needed to get by

i fell for the delusion that my love was enough to mend the cracks in your soul

in doing so, i shattered my own

now the delusion is gone

all that remains is the quiet hum of a new day

the gentle promise of a sunrise that is wholly mine