SincerelyOliver

the second time was yesterday. i was telling my friend (+ one person who i’m mostly friends with) that i’m in the guys group this year for theater camp and one goes “oh, are you trans?” and before i even had time to THINK, i just said “uh…yeah, i think so, actually.” she asked my pronouns and i told her, no hesitation. she asked if i had a new name and i chickened out because i’m not attached enough to one yet.

then this morning my friend sat down next to me and five minutes later i just said “by the way, i think i’m trans and i use he/they pronouns.” she just said “cool”.

In my experience the main way I’ve seen change is when people acknowledge it without me coming out (if that makes sense). For example, I was in a show a couple years back, while measuring me for something the director cassualy asked my pronouns (guess she got a vibe lol, shoutout that lady she was awesome) I froze up and just stuttered. She moved on. Even thinking about it would make my breathing shake for months.

A couple weeks ago my friend mentioned they accidently used my chosen name in front of their parents. And it scared me, it did. It does. But I’m not nearly as paralysed in it as I was back then. I’ve begun to fathom the concept of safety and that feels strange, foreign and dangerous. But it’s good. Even if it terrifies me, it’s good.

Happy Pride! 💗🏳️‍🌈