H

probably the worst attitude tumblr unintentionally cultivates is "the world out there is completely dangerous for you and no one can possibly understand you, so you should isolate yourself from it and avoid interacting with it as much as possible"

quirky fourth wall breaking character but theyre just fucking. wrong about the medium theyre in. they keep making references to cinematic techniques and directorial styles and the other fourth wall breaking character is like "dumbass we're in a fucking comic book" and they are in a video game.

[gourdworld accent] turn the zucchini on. they just squashed the gourd trade center. it doesnt matter what channel. they hit the fucking pentagourd

my troublesome vassals have stopped squabbling amongst themselves ever since i introduced my 80% tax. this is great

"incurious" still GOAT insult. You could be better but you're not. You could learn but you won't, and for no good reason, just a base dispositional apathy. Get fucked

ancient roman women whose husband keeps looking at the neighbour's boy quintus and he never looks at her that way and she can't even chainsmoke in the kitchen because they don't have marlboro blues in ancient times. and she can't even go to the club because they haven't discovered drum and bass music yet. her friend clodia's having visions of a woman named doechii but neither of them knows what that means

They absolutely had the club it was just smaller cult worship that were basically ragers

🥚❤

world where the first person to masturbate was a girl named jake: i'm gonna go jake it

world where dogs are called cats and cats are called something else: i gotta get going. nice hanging out with y'all, but i gotta feed my something else

world where arthritis was first identified in canines and also where things are named after the noise that the animal they were first identified in makes: arfthritis

world where US political offices are named after sausages: i am running for ໄສ້ອັ່ວ

world where instead of greek letters, mathematical symbols were named after various aquatic plants: and then we just multiply by the water lily

is this your weed thoughts

world where thoughts are divided into various plant categories:

world where the english gerund is "snirt": i'm gosnirt to the shop cuz my car needs repairsnirt

world where time and cause & effect goes backwards: yeah i went to a concert to cover for how i called into work yesterday

world where oranges are yellow: fuck i could really use a yellow rn

world where transubstantiation is in vogue: yeah i need to go to the store to get more jesus

world where various political ideologies are named after rodents: i just can't get down with fox squirrels, they just don't represent an actual systemic change to house mouse thought

world where all art and artists are named after insects: the beetles

world where positions of morality are named after molluscs: death grips - giving snail people slug ideas