I'm sorry.???
@acarefreewind
Okey
h
we're not kids anymore.

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@side-frog
I'm sorry.???
@acarefreewind
Okey

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being trans is awesome ill be like "hey someone was transphobic to me on reddit" and someone else will be like "then get off reddit" and im like "well theyre also transphobic to me on tumblr" and they're like "well thats because youre on tumblr" and ill say "well people are transphobic on instagram and twitter" and people are like "yeah twitter and instagram are cesspits" and its like. i think you guys are missing the point that trans people should not be forced out of any space due to violent rhetoric and threats about who we are and yet its happening all the time. and yall seem to think thats just how it is and it shouldnt be
one of the reblogged tags has inspired me. yes, this is also about places that aren't accepting to trans people, im thinking of the south specifically. i left the south and moved out west, and we love it here, but we miss the south all the time. i lived my whole life in tennessee and i miss it all the time. i think about it all the time. and people will be like "but evan tennessee is a bad place to be trans" and it is. it is a bad place to be trans. but its my HOME. i grew up there, i lived my whole life until last year there, i have so many memories there. and im happy out here and its def more my speed out here but i would love the option to go back if i ever wanted to. and loads of trans people never leave tennessee or the south in general because its their home. trans people shouldnt be constantly forced and encouraged to move hundreds and thousands of miles away from the places they grew up and love because its unsafe to be trans there, it should simply be safe to be trans there
pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say
Some of you may not want to hear this, but sometimes autism accommodation means giving that socially awkward person who said something that came off as passive aggressive or uncomfortable the benefit of the doubt. Not everyone is capable of reading social rules and cues effectively, I thought this was autism 101.
you can always ask for clarification or (NICELY) explain how it came off to you, remember!
I have an autistic coworker who used to say really uncomfortable things to museum guests while making small talk. like bringing up active, controversial revolutions in their countries if they were international, and such. finally, after a group of Hawaiian guys got visibly angry when he asked if they were "in the military or just rich" to be able to live there- meant to be a cost of living joke -I said, "hey, personally, I try not to talk politics with guests. sometimes it may upset them and we don't get paid enough to deal with that"
he looked thoughtful and said, "oh, I never considered it that way." turns out he was just a geopolitics nerd and didn't realize people might react emotionally to what he saw as a purely intellectual discussion
he hasn't done it since
It IS important to tell people how they come off when it's actively causing problems in their personal and professional life. On multiple occasions, I've seen people online who are doing and saying very off-putting things surrounded by people cheering them on, because said audience sees them as a bold iconoclast. But it was also very obvious the person in question was severely stressed, frustrated, and did not understand why they kept getting negative reactions from most people (in some cases, reactions with serious consequences, affecting personal and professional relationships). Their ostensible supporters and friends had zero interest in helping them navigate this, because they saw them as a hero or martyr rather than a real person who needed help, regardless of whether they were technically correct or at least making good points. If you actually care about someone, you do need to take them aside when you see this happening. They're not obligated to follow your advice, of course, but at least they'll know why they get those reactions.

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one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.
The Kansas Industrialist, Manhattan, October 18, 1916
I have found the best ally
Straight and cis people will say that they are allies, but you will NEVER measure up to my dentist.
Me: "Hey, is it ok if I can change my name on my info from [DEADNAME] to Sai?"
Random woman that I wasn't even talking to in the chair next to me: "Honey, if that's the name you had at birth, [DEADNAME] is your only name."
My dentist, very slowly turning her rolley chair towards the woman: "Shush."
Random woman: "Excuse me?"
Destist: *closes privacy curtain while staring bullets at the lady*
Me: *pissing myself laughing*
My dentist while changing my name in my info (reminder that English is not her first language, she immigrated from Russia): "There, Sai, you have pretty boy teeth. Smile and make all girls swoon."
Me not having the heart to tell her I'm not transmasc but I'm Agender, and still pissing myself laughing: "Thank you [DENTIST NAME]."
Rb to have pretty chosen gender teeth. Smile and make all girls swoon.
transcendental hygienist
ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs
after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?
i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out
age gap relationships where the older one outlives the younger one >>>>>>>>>
the crushing weight of the guilt when you already feel like you're stealing someone's life away, dragging them down like a dead weight chained to their ankles; selfishly draining their youth to fill your own twilight years, vampiric. and then the unthinkable happens. they're gone, and you remain. the grave you were digging for yourself becomes theirs instead. they were supposed to still have time, to leave you behind to grow and live, to make new memories in your absence. you were meant to be a chapter in their grand narrative of their life, and nothing more. they could have been something greater than you ever were. but the curtain call you were waiting for came for them instead. and now all that's left of them is you.

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i think one of the worst things the left wing internet ever did was push the idea that oppression is basically a virtue, and being oppressed is a sign of your morality. it has made it like…impossible for some of you to hold the idea that most people are privileged in some ways and oppressed in others. AND a lot of you seem to have it in your mind that terrible people cannot be oppressed, and that oppressed people cannot do terrible things, which is a dangerous rhetoric to hold imo.
may be a hot take but i think the fact minors can access 18+ content by just clicking a button that says 'yes im totally over 18 trust me' is like. totally fine tbh. its a non-issue. i dont care if curious teenagers are looking at porn. they've been doing that for as long as porn has existed. id rather teens explore their sexuality through images on the internet than rush into real life experiences when they're not ready for it yknow. the UK is trying to put stricter age verification in place (which in turn is becoming an online privacy nightmare) and like. for what. who is it helping. why is this a problem.
People panic about "But what if kids pick up bad ideas from it???"
When I was a kid, Power Rangers got banned at school because we all thought it was incredibly cool and kept trying to kick each other in the head. No-one bothered explaining "Those are trained actors and it's all practiced, they don't *actually* hurt each other, and you're not good at that yet", they just banned it.
So we went to the park after school and read Kim's smuggled copy of the Power Rangers magazine and kicked each other in the head there instead.
(This is a metaphor, but it's also literally true. So much kicking in the head.)
God forbid parents actually talk to their teenagers.
explosion at health potion factory 0 dead 0 injured
I would actually go as far as to say that MOST abuse is unintentional. I think most people will go through their lives without ever experiencing intentional abuse. People are abusive because they're selfish, because they're stressed, because they care more about what society thinks they should do than the impacts of their actions on their children and partners, because they think what they're doing is correct, because they've made it make sense in their own heads, because they think they can fix their victims, they think they can fix their relationships, they think they can stop you from leaving, they think they can make you a better partner to them, they think that means you need to do what they want. We've sort of constructed mental illness in a way that doing this shit to other people counts as a form of mental illness because it is anti social behavior in the literal sense— it is behavior that causes social harm.
I don't say any of this to excuse it. I think everyone needs to be more aware of this because if you think abuse has to be intentional you will never realize you are capable of abusive behavior. You will never realize you are being shitty to the people you love, because YOU know what you mean, YOU know you don't mean any harm. But you're doing harm. You need to pay attention to the impact you have on other people, and you need to do it all the time, Especially when you feel least capable of doing so. Sorry! You live in a society. Get your head out of your ass.
yes, India made legal gender change impossible but the doctor down the street who gives me my T shots in a clinic so small that it's just two rooms was excited for me when she said my voice had dropped yes, India made legal gender change impossible but the receptionist who could see that I was a man didn't bat an eyelash when I asked to see the gynecologist and called me sir when he asked how I wanted to pay yes, India made legal gender change impossible but the barber cuts my hair exactly how I want it and never gave me strange looks for being in a men's salon not even back when I didn't pass as one
yes, India made legal gender change impossible but my friends have always gendered me correctly and stick to it even when it confuses other people and my friend's little sibling calls me older brother in Kannada yes, India made legal gender change impossible but my dog learned my new name quicker than the humans and she runs to give me a kiss when she's told to without being confused about who's being referred to
yes, India made legal gender change impossible but I can feel the Adam's apple growing in my throat and my muscles getting stronger, and my smile more real and I'm growing a beard, and I talk more freely
yes, India made legal gender change impossible but I'm here, and I'm alive, and so are you and there are good people, people who care and don't let them make you forget that-- you are not alone.

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to be honest im really sick of the fact that fat people are supposed to suck it up when other peoples worst fear is looking like them
y’all.
last night someone left the door open and none of us could figure out who did it. not a huge deal but it’s important to keep the animals in, if they were to get out of their room into the main space. since we all swore we shut it behind us we decided to look back at the motion sensor game cam to see if it bounced open or something so we could fix it so it wouldn’t do that.
i was like “it had to have somehow bounced open. it’s not like anyone out here would be breaking in.”
my friend joked, “there were a few deer in the pasture last night that looked shifty.”
Well you’re never gonna fucking believe this.
I even thought to myself “maybe it was me?” because of my ADHD. but shutting doors and gates is one of my ONLY reliable habits because i’ve been on farms my whole life.
I’m never second-guessing myself again after this, frankly. from now on when I misplace my keys I’m gonna be like, well maybe they were taken by a wild animal.