i cant wait to be a piece of shit w/ a bachelors degree

the job of an actor soo funnysilly apparently matthew macfadyen was in london when they were filming some of the ep ????? but he had to deliver the 'i'm putting the phone by his ear' lines live for authentic reaction purposes. so he was in his actual real house waking up at weird hours to tell the fake people that their dad is dead. Goodnight honey goodnight kids i'm just going to be wambsganning about in the spare room for the next few hours acting transatlantically

also roman knowing that 10 comes after 9, and then explaining how many thousands are in a million to his siblings. literally king of understanding numbers. haters will say training management was for nothing, but look at him now.

“me when i lie” is the funniest way to call someone a liar the internet has cooked up thus far

pennant winged nightjar

I hate calling in sick I don't want to inform anyone about my abnormal bowel movements

I love it. I call them up and say hey bossman I'm camped out on the shitter today yeehaw

you are so beautiful in every way

We will get married on a windswept cliff and the dinner will be easily digestible