'Shit , wait no.' -Ancient proverb

Ladies night!

I just ate basically uncooked oatmeal and it was pretty good

literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified ‘that girl’ in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

op managed to swing a bat at 2 hornets nests in one go

You can always tell when misinformation is from TikTok. It's genetically distinct from other internet misinformation. It always has the vibe of "some very online people having an argument where they had to take a real source and stretch their interpretations like two dogs fighting over a side of pulled pork"

can you imagine being a priest like oh put on this collar to show that you’re god’s special little boy. slut

I genuinely can’t comprehend the uniquely Christian urge to see someone at their lowest and think “Now is the perfect time. I should tell them about my religion.”

Well, yeah. Because Jesus heals.

Better ask him to heal ur mom cuz I blew her back tf out last night. Thank g-d today is Shabbat bc I need the rest

dom who sticks their fingers down your throat, asks you a question, and laughs when you try to answer

Yes, yes, the dentist.  We’ve all been there.

no one seems happier in life than those eccentric old ladies who wear all one color or collect frogs or have wacky hair colors and usually live alone with some funky pets and have weekly book club meetings with their equally amazing friends

u ever in such a bad mood u feel urself turning evil?

had an actual meal. not evil anymore