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shark vs the universe
$LAYYYTER
noise dept.

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@senpaichan

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**eats three raspberries* I can feel my cells multiplying. my blood is cleaner, safer. my skin……less dry. I am well. I am nourished.
God the 11 year old girls you put on this earth to climb trees and play with plastic animals are buying foundation at the drug store
Holy fuck you illegally downloaded a cardigan
Dang. The skill needed to know how to use all of those machines, the vision, the planning. Wowzers.
Got a hole in your cardigan? The fix is simple! First, bust out your portable Jacquard loom ...
made this into a gif bc i liked it so much. shark Denied

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me: truly a well crafted tragedy is such a bittersweet pleasure to take in and serves a purpose, not just as a sad story but as a reminder that even that which ends badly might not have happened in vain or for nothing. The love, the grief, the actions still meant something simply for having taken place and for us partaking in it.
me when said tragedy is about to actually unfold, sweating: ok but consider this. i dont want this to happen
Via Authors Against Book Bans - May 29, 2026
Three federal book ban bills are currently alive in the United States Congress:
HR 7661
Status: Passed out of committee; to be introduced in the House Would amend the Elementary and Secondary Education Act (ESEA) to prohibit federal funds from being used for any material deemed “sexually oriented.” Buried within that definition is language that includes material that “involves gender dysphoria or transgenderism.” While framed as protecting children, the bill opens the door to banning books that include LGBTQ+ characters, defining trans existence as inherently inappropriate, and narrowing literature toward a prescribed, limited canon. In short: Would treat any LGBTQ+ identity as sexual content.
HR 2616
Status: Passed the House; referred to a Senate committee Would withhold ESEA funding from schools that “teach or advance concepts related to gender ideology,” using definitions from Executive Order 14168. It frames itself as protecting children. In practice, it represents another attempt to eliminate not only trans and nonbinary books, but also any acknowledgment of gender non‑conforming people in public education. In short: Would deny the existence of trans and nonbinary people.
HR 8705
Status: Passed out of committee; to be introduced in the House Rather than naming specific books or categories of literature, it blocks federal funding for American History and Civics Education from being used to promote what it calls “discriminatory equity ideology” or “gender ideology,” definitions drawn from a January 29, 2025 executive order. Likely impacts would include fewer books on racism and civil rights, less discussion of sexism and inequality, narrower civics curricula, and publishers pulling back on diverse perspectives. In short: A funding lever that shapes whose version of history gets taught.
HR 7661 and HR 8705 are still in the House, so please call your representative and tell them to oppose both bills. Click here to find the phone number of your representative’s office.
HR 2616 passed the House, and has been introduced to a Senate committee. Please call your senators and tell them to oppose the bill. Click here to find the phone numbers for your senators’ offices.
good lord this thing is useless
idk what yall are mad about the new Lies Your Older Cousin Tells You machine is working great
Happy horse on mars day
I don't know who needs to hear this, but if the phrase "self care" doesn't resonate with you, try calling it "system maintenance" and see if that clicks.
Reblogging to add amazing tags from @meta-theory
#this both makes things more fun and also is a really good analogy#because there are four types of system maintenance and that makes the term much more exact than the nebulous ''self-care''#and therefore much more helpful to those of us who uhhh struggle with nebulosity#for anyone curious the four types are:#1. corrective (to fix current problems)#2. preventative (to avoid future problems)#3. adaptative (to re-adjust to any changes)#4. perfective (to work towards a better system)#I really like this idea I'm gonna make a checklist
Official ominous sign
{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need to Know about Self-Care
[image description: photo of a sign with all caps text reading:
"Warning
If you don't schedule time for maintenance, your equipment will schedule it for you."]

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dump his ass. move to a walkable city. start hormones. get into fiber crafts. dye your hair weird. grow an herb garden. foster a distrustful cat. take a welding class. invite your friends over for tea and cake. get way too into obscure media. explore a new cuisine. lie to the police. protest in the streets. life has so many possibilities don't it?
make out with a frenemy. buy noise cancelling headphones. wear office inappropriate attire. quit a toxic workplace. improve your apartment. start a dog walking sidegig. get on first name basis with your local librarians. bully politicians at town hall meetings. get an unexpected piercing. cultivate farmer's market connections. trade recipes with a gossipy old neighbor. unionize your apartment complex. move to the countryside. let a friend take you larping. keep a sword on your mantleplace
get a tattoo on your 40th birthday. be tempted to buy a loom. do a charity drag show. sue your landlord. buy a really nice kitchen appliance. volunteer at an anarchist soup kitchen. rediscover a tv show you watched when you were 8. spam your state senators. shop at asian grocery stores. do cosplay. buy trans flags in bulk and mount them along the highway. go viral for unexpected reasons. move in with your best friend. make lemoncello with leftover lemon rinds. run for school board membership. explore pegging.
update: i'm delighted to report this post has been responsible for at least one person dumping his ass
update: three four people
Biggest fuck-up ever is that people have to pay to become doctors
Like unironically we should be subsidising at least 50% of their educations. What do you mean we have a shortage of doctors we should have surplus. What do you mean they’re being overworked they should be treated like royalty, they can fix human bodies
I don’t care if some of them are only doing it for the money. I don’t care if all of them are only doing it for the money. Intentions don’t matter to the stitches in my nana’s leg or the ten billion other lifesaving treatments we all get at a detriment to their finances and mental wellbeing. Entire cities are kept alive by just a couple thousand of them what are we DOINGGGGG
If we had more, maybe it would be easier to get the shitty ones fucking replaced. The board isn't going to do much to the only endocrinologist in the state who takes Medicaid, you know? But if there were more than, idk, maybe 5? Maybe then?
You are describing a hero BBC, he just wasn't a cartoon saint:
"[Robin Hood] wasn't noble at all, but a yeoman, a rung above a peasant...and while he was perfectly nice to the poor, helping them was not his main purpose. His enemies were the corrupt clergy and the land-owning nobles who took advantage of their underlings."
Robin Hood began as an oral tradition in the 12th Century before morphing into a heroic, family-friendly stereotype – here's how new takes a
"he wasn't a rich person stealing from other rich people for charity, he was poor and attacking the people who kept people in poverty!" okay so basedbasedbased
It's fine to disagree with the IAU about the definition of "planet"; however, if your definition includes Pluto but not Ceres, Orcus, Haumea, Quaoar, Makemake, Gonggong, Eris or Sedna, you don't actually care what a planet is – you just want the exact list of nine planets you learned in primary school back. Your cute little Pluto-including orbital distance mnemonic ought to be at least seventeen words long, and good fucking luck with the Q!
My Very Exciting Magic Carpet Just Sailed Under Nine Orphic Palaces, Slandering Hungry Quaker Matrons Going Erotically Southward.
I appreciate that you included Salacia but not Charon – really threading the needle pedantry-wise there.
Not to state the obvious but I love Garak's facial expression in The Wire while Julian is telling him that he thought The Neverending Sacrifice is boring. Julian may as well have spat in his face or stabbed him
nah he wouldve enjoyed those options

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#i literally crack up everytime #at least ten of the notes are from me
This will reach a million posts before I stop reblogging EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
AND IT’S BACK ON MY DASH. LOVELY.
i'm getting the sense some of you are not actually forklift certified.
well damn . egg on my face
THE PLOT THICKENS @averagejoey2000 explain yourself
I can't believe this is how I'm finding out that I got a scam forklift cert.
I took the cargo ops class at school but my teacher explained that it doesn't give a certification and I'd only be okay for ship's crane and the school forklifts. she said I could take an online exam and get my cert. I paid 60 bucks.
I'm googling and I'm seeing a lot of resources saying that the online programs cover the classroom part of the exam but not the in person practical aspect.
29 CFR 1910.178 (l)(2)(ii)
but I did the in person practical shit at school.
the back of the card even had fancy numbers on it. I couldn't have known that this isn't the one. this website sounded more official than certifyme.net, and there wasn't one with a .gov address.
so, I emailed OSHA, and they said that so long as I live and work in California, there's no such thing as forklift certification. I have to be told how to do it every time I get the job.
Update: I took a certification class in shipboard Material Handling Equipment at my federal job. *now* I'm forklift certified, but only on ships and piers and only for this company, but also rated to forklift explosives and hazardous materials. Also I'm a woman now.