DAMNATIO MEMORIAE

And then...

REDDIT JUST HAD TO BREAK OUT INTO SONG AND IT WAS SPECTACULAR.

Just had to share.

I befriended a feral cat once who had spent her life in the forest without human interaction. I was worried about her because she had a paw damaged from an old injury and was emaciated but obviously nursing kittens that were hidden away somewhere. It took me weeks of putting out food and sitting across the yard every evening for her to trust me even a little and when she decided we were friends and she expected dinner every night she started coming to my door and trying to call for me in the evening, but she didn’t meow. Why would she? Cats only meow naturally as kittens when their vocal chords/ears aren’t fully developed, adult cats communicate with vocalizations that aren’t audible to humans. She probably tried making noises I couldn’t hear to call me but ended up sticking to the one I always responded to- a horrible yowling growl that she had made at me when we first encountered each other in the forest. Except once we were friends she would make this noise while purring and rubbing affectionately against a nearby tree or the porch railing (because she didn’t want to touch me yet). This understandably freaked my family members out but I was touched that she had taken the time to find a way to basically yell FUCK OFF in an affectionate way.

Fast forward to when she finally trusts me enough to bring her hidden kittens out of the forest to me, long story short I gained their trust and put them in this big pen, that I had previously used to keep chickens in, so they’d be safe and to keep her from having another litter. Except she was already secretly pregnant again! (Fix your pets, guys, they make SO many babies) and ended up having her new babies in this pen. I kept my distance, sitting on the outside once they were born until she seemed comfortable enough to let me come inside. The kittens were a bit wild, hissing viscously at me as soon as they opened their eyes, but they warmed up to me. There were four of them and soon they all wanted to be the center of attention during the twice daily play sessions. I’d be playing with one and another would meow insistently behind me and I’d immediately answer them and give them love, teaching them that humans could be friends that answer their needs- making them adoptable once they were weaned. Mama cat (Artie) would just watch me play with them, and I guess she was doing some thinking because one day when they were about a month old I was playing with them and one meowed behind me. I was confused because I hadn’t realized there was a kitten behind me and when I turned, there wasn’t. The only cat there was Artie looking at me really intensely. I turned back around to the kittens and I heard the meow again, I turned back to Artie and responded in the way I always did with the kittens “yes baby?” And she meowed again in an exact imitation of her kittens! After that she would.not.shut.up. It was like she had cracked some kind of code, meowing for attention and snacks and just to say hi. Her two older kittens, the ones she’d had in the forest, had never meowed at me either but started to once they saw how I responded to their mom. and I find it endlessly fascinating because before that it had never occurred to me that cats only meow at humans because they were taught by other cats to keep meowing past kittenhood because that’s the best way to get a human’s attention.

im reminded of when i went to sit my philosophy exam and had an ex-officer as an invidulator. he asked me if i was trans, something i had no obligation to answer. but if i didnt, i would be cagey. i would now paint an image of all trans people being rude in his mind, so i said yes

that invidulator asked me why, as a trans student, i should have my rights respected if there are so few of us

and instead of rightfully getting pissed off, i had to remember that i am currently representing a community of millions to a single man in a room with just the two of us in it. i could be the deciding factor on how he conducts behaviour with trans people in the future. what if he gets called to invidulate again in 20 years time and has another trans student? what if he remembers the one he met before, and instantly assumes he knows our community?

so i explained to him why i should have rights. and i used my words carefully, because if i slip up even once i have now put a trans person in danger, because he has made a choice based on me

trans people dont get to be angry. cis people always joke about how we demand a space, or we demand the right name, or we demand they bow down to us

think very carefully, did that trans woman demand that you use the right name, or did she correct you? did that trans man hold you at gunpoint, demanding you let him piss in public, or did he look like he wanted to use the disabled toilet to avoid bothering you all together. did the nonbinary trans person have you on your knees begging for forgiveness, or did they ask nicely for you to be mindful of their pronouns?

the transphobic narrative is one of victimhood, meanwhile if i even use the wrong tone cis people will act as a child does, and they will demand that the next trans person they meet apologise

every trans person you meet is aware of this too. we're all very tuned into the fact that we are ambassadors, and that we never asked to be that. i dont want to have to very carefully consider 'will a curt answer mean someome later dies', but every day of my life i do

and cis people need to know that. to be trans is to literally walk on constant eggshells of cis fragility. its why when we see a new trans celebrity we have to desperately hope they dont do stupid fucking shit like caitlyn jenner did. because now everyone thinks trans women are like her. because now negotiations for our right to exist unmolested have gone back another 20 years

and tbh, cis people are pathetically weak. a trans person asked you to use the right name? that did not happen in a vacuum. that trans person has met 50-60 cis people today who refused

feeling anything mentioned in this post doesn’t mean you have to identify as trans, but feeling anything in this post is literally all that’s necessary to identify as trans if you want to.

You can want to be another gender.

You can want to divorce all connection to the gender you were born into.

You can want to keep it as an origin point that shapes your journey.

You can want to be more than one gender at once.

You can want to be more than one gender, at different times.

You can want to be no gender.

You can want to be sort of in between genders.

You can want to be both genders.

You can want to be rid of gendered body parts you already have.

You can want to keep gendered body parts while also being another gender.

You can want to be rid of them but not want the side effects of excising them.

You can feel dysphoria at being shaped like/viewed as/treated like a gender you don’t want.

You can feel euphoria at being shaped like/viewed as/treated like a gender you do want.

You can change your mind or adjust your goals or refine your wishes.

You can be stationary and fixed in your identity.

You can be fluid and changing.

You can be extremely gendered in your presentation.

You can be not very gendered in your presentation.

You can be androgynous.

You can be a little of both.

You can be a lot of both.

If gender is a line you can cross, as the words trans (across/on the other side of) and cis (here/on the same side of) indicate, you can cross it in any way you like, including dancing on top of it.

Be happy.

since i haven’t seen this floating around tumblr i figured i’d post it!! the link on the tweet is broken but this one works too

and as a reminder to the lovely gringos who follow me

(that’s a british pound my google is in portuguese srry)

if yr a goy [that is, not jewish] u need to stop using goblins as an aesthetic, as a quirky jokey derogatory phrase for yrself, etc. u need to acknowledge that goblins r an antisemetic caricature, that’s their origin n that’s what they still represent today. jews have been saying this for years n im fucking tired of goyim ignoring us. just cuz it seems inconsequential to u doesnt mean it is for us n just cuz yr one jewish friend said it was ok doesnt mean they speak for all of us

u wanna keep ur goblincore aesthetic? do the bare fucking minimum n call it corvidcore instead. i see u goyim w yr “goblincore” blogs where u post pics of gold coins n jewish caricatures of greedy creatures w green skin n hooked noses. yr calling yrself a “goblin” cuz yr messy or whatever? get into the grunge aesthetic, bring that back n embrace that instead

goyim stop using goblins to describe yrself, yr aesthetics, any part of yr identity, PERIOD. im fucking sick of it lol

Identifying as bisexual because you're attracted to people of two or more genders, but not all = good

Identifying as bisexual because you're attracted to the same gender as you, plus one or more other genders = good

Identifying as bisexual because you're attracted to some genders, but not all, and gender still plays a role in your attraction = good

Identifying as bisexual because it's the one people know = good

Identifying as bisexual because you like the term = good

Identifying as bisexual because you like the flag = good

Identifying as pansexual because gender plays no role in your attraction = good

Identifying as pansexual because you're attracted to all genders = good

Identifying as pansexual because you like the term = good

Identifying as pansexual because you like the flag = good

Identifying as polysexual because you're attracted to multiple genders, but not all, but otherwise gender plays no role in your attraction = good

Identifying as polysexual because you're attracted to multiple genders, but not your own = good

Identifying as polysexual because you want to be able to say you're polysexual and polyamorous = good

Identifying as polysexual because you like the term = good

Identifying as polysexual because you like the flag = good

Identifying as omnisexual because you're attracted to all genders, but gender still plays a role in your attraction = good

Identifying as omnisexual because you like the term = good

Identifying as omnisexual because you like the flag = good

Identifying as queer because you don't feel the need to specifically describe your attraction, or because you aren't sure = good

Identifying as queer because your specific attraction isn't anyone else's business = good

Identifying as queer because you like the term = good

Identifying as queer because you like the flag = good

Identifying as bisexual because "bisexuality means attraction to men and women" = bad, excludes non-binary people

Identifying as pansexual, polysexual, omnisexual, or queer because "bisexuality excludes non-binary people" = bad, it doesn't

Identifying as bisexual because "other m-spec identities are just trying to be special" = bad, some people want to define their attraction more specifically and that's ok

Identifying as pansexual because you're into "hearts, not parts" = bad, parts are not the same as genders, and sexual orientation describes attraction to genders, not genitalia

Identifying as bisexual or polysexual because "pansexuality and/or omnisexuality means attraction to every person" = bad, they describe the capacity to experience attraction to people of any gender

Ariana Grande is darkening her skin and changing her features to look Racially Ambiguous to sell to a wider audience and it needs to be addressed

Black people, who invented hip-hop, jazz, and rock and roll, have long been tastemakers of American cool. In many ways, fashion, music, and slang are dictated by black people no matter how little credit they get for it..

In fact:

“Our research shows that black consumer choices have a ‘cool factor’ that has created a halo effect, influencing not just consumers of color but the mainstream as well,” said Cheryl Grace, senior vice president of U.S. Strategic Community Alliances and Consumer Engagement, Nielsen.

Thus, presumably, if you want to be cool and sell records, you ought to start acting black. In fact, it’s great if you’re not black and act black because you get the benefits of being cool without the baggage and limitations of being subjected to racism.

Its what the Kardashians, Iggy, Justin Bieber, Ariana, and alot of other celebrities do in order to rise in popularity as well as be accepted into the black community.

  Grande’s music is largely influenced by hip-hop and R&B, meaning that in order to build a fanbase, she needs to court listeners (ahem, black folk) with those musical preferences. Grande, who is quick to shut down any perceptions about her ethnicity being anything but Italian. Most people presume Grande is Latinx, not necessarily black, when mistaking her race, but I am here to tell you, most Latinos are part black, sis. 

Thus, for years, Latinx women have been sounding the alarm: Grande is doing brown face. Look at her tan!! Look at how she speaks! Look at her music!

The point is: Most of us don’t get to pick and choose which parts of blackness we get to have — only white folks seem to have that luxury. And we need to give her the SAME ENERGY we give the kardashians.

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