Cat Owner

You’re all monsters

No!!! Of course not!!!! She’s wonderful!

i want her to decorate my room

If I was married to Beyoncé, I simply wouldn’t have cheated

RIP Jay-Z but I’m different

You know what? You’re absolutely right

Born too early to explore the galaxy and born too late to drunkenly fist fight Victor Hugo in the Parisian sewers

Modern poetry at its finest

In 20 years no one’s gonna know what this means.

The super suit reference held up for like 14 years so I’m not too sure about that.

Me getting my name called to get my order at Starbucks

cowboys never die. they just ride off into the sunset

is that what your parents told you when you came back from school one day and your cowboy was missing

*clicks page 2 of google search results* the deep web

i can’t die but thank you :) im sure this information will be useful for someone who can

adulthood is just a constant struggle of, “man, i want cookies for breakfast, but I also recognize this is a bad nutritional decision.  On the other hand, the only one who can stop me is me.  i know that fucker’s weaknesses.  i could totally take me in a fight.”