Juno

getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

[ID: excerpt from an article reading: One of my favorite stories, which should drive anyone who has every played in a band crazy-- there’s this bassoon player who has sat next to the same clarinet player since 1988. She’s convinced he plays half a note4 flat on every note he’s every played. He denies this. /]

Christian babies have so far not found a purpose or use outside of baseball

Actually when I say “fuck all billionaires” I particularly mean Taylor “having my wedding in the middle of the busiest city in the world on the busiest weekend in the world in the part of the city the majority of commuters need to get through because fuck working people” Swift

I'm gonna be honest for a second. I cant believe people still care about Taylor swift.

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

yall are so fucking weird about gnc people. a woman wears a suit and she's "conforming to the patriarchy". a man wears a skirt and he's Secretly A Trans Egg. have you considered It's Fabric

You would not believe the things I have heard as a transfem butch.

also the treatment of gnc cis men tells me a lot about how you'd treat gnc trans men. like, you think that if a man likes feminine clothing he's secretly a woman? do you know how many people have told me i'm not "actually trans" because i like feminine clothing? stop reinforcing gender norms i am Begging

one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.

all my haters become tomaters in my lovely summer garden

Its good

Sound designing a vampire being hit in the face with a shovel is... challenging. Who would've guessed.

[Audio transcript: Ben Galpin voicing Jonathan Harker from Dracula by Bram Stoker. He says, "There was no lethal weapon at hand, but I seized a shovel which the workmen had been using to fill the cases, and lifting it high, struck, with the edge downward, at the hateful face," followed by a cartoon "bonk" and the Wilhelm scream. End transcript]

Spiritually my spirit is always smoking a cigarette but physically i am.not because hashatg smoking kills