Endearingly Neurotic

small town diner waitress voice: Omelas? Oh, oh no, easy mistake, you're in oh - MAY - las right now, with an A. Plenty' people get the name mixed up. Nope, no utopia here, just our small little town. *face gets really grim* We do still.. Okay well we do still have a kid that we... I mean it isn't working but- well- You know. It- It's fine. I'm sure it'll start working soon.

The really funny thing about "snakes aren't mammals your snake girl shouldn't have breasts!" is like yeah. Neither should your cat girl.

Like yes, non-mammals don't make milk, but you actually don't need the whole kit that humans do in order to make milk. Arguably its not even the important part of the breast to begin with.

You also don't need to justify it at all you can just be a pervert about it.

That's actually really interesting honestly.

it would suck being a new immortal. like it’d be 2109 and people would go, “what was it like seeing ancient civilizations rise and fall like that? seeing the pyramids being built? watching the expansion and growth of the new world?” and i’d just be like, “no…no i was born in 1991. so like, wow i’m gonna see some cool stuff, but, i mean i’m not that much older than just a really, really old person, you know? phones were big back then. so big. but only for like ten years, then they got like, as good as they are now. uh. rhinos existed. don’t think i ever saw one in person. cool, good talk.”

even worse, imagine being an immortal who keeps missing stuff. “What was it like seeing the pyramids being built?” “Fuck if I know, I was in Madagascar.” “Oh, okay. Well, how was the Renaissance?” “I fell down a hole in Scotland and people thought I was an enchanted well for four hundred years, it was over by the time I convinced someone to get me out.”

It’s been a decade since we left that comment and you have the best reply anyone’s left to it.

using tumblr is a really awesome way to learn about the types of people in the world because you will see a post by mutual #1 that's like "just jacked off with my awesome penis #my penis tag" and then scroll down exactly one post to see mutual #2 posting "this might be tmi but i live in a house"

ah shit they're gaining on us. we gotta jettison some weight. throw all those stolen boomerangs out we don't need em

On it, boss!

Bad news, boss!

WHEN THE MODERN FRAMEWORK OF GENDER, SEX, AND SEXUALITY WAS LITERALLY BORN OUT OF 19TH CENTURY RACE SCIENCE YOU CANNOT DISCUSS FEMINISM OF ANY KIND WITHOUT HAVING TO FIRST DISCUSS THE RACIALIZATION OF GENDER ASSIGNMENT/PERCEPTION

like i cannot stress enough that when "man" and "woman" got codified "scientifically" in the 1800s as intrinsically seperate categories within western society THEY EXPLICITLY STATED BLACK AND BROWN PEOPLE WERE TOO PRIMITIVE TO DEVELOP THIS DISTINCTION. WE WERE QUITE LITERALLY SEEN AS A THIRD UNDIFFERENTIATED CATEGORY BELOW (WHITE) MEN AND WOMEN.

Like you CANNOT divorce gender as a construct from race as it was literally born out of the social construct of race. Black/Brown Trans Woman and White Trans Woman are, for all intents and purposes, discrete gender identities historically speaking. And the worst part is that this way that both Black/Brown women of ANY gender have had to fight to be recognized as people - much less women - should be a point of solidarity between white trans women and black/brown women. but every time we try to have this discussion it turns into a fucking flamewar bc of white fragility

South American Feminist Maria Lugones discusses this in The Coloniality of Gender.

I love getting unaccompanied minors (kids flying alone) who so clearly just. Don't want to be here lol. Sometimes I get to know a little of their story, like their parents are divorced, or a family member died and they're heading to the funeral, but usually they just don't want to talk about it and that's fine. But I always treat the flight like it's a challenge to make them smile. I offer them snacks and soda but that's never enough, that's whatever, they could get those from an airport vending machine. Chump change. So then I tell the worst jokes. Just the most embarrassing, kindergarten teacher, annoying dad jokes you can think of. And those always get a groan, or a "Seriously??" And that's my in! Now I can say "Why, what's your idea of a good joke? No, come on hotshot, make your best joke, let's see it." And they hem and they haw but of course they eventually tell me their very best joke because kids are little competitive comedy goldmines. And it's always super funny, so I laugh, and that's where they slip up. Because you know what you almost always do when your joke successfully makes someone laugh? You smile. And I'm like. Gotcha. Rookie move. Now you're going to end up having a good time in spite of yourself. I win.

Did this with an 11yo u.m. today and he said "What did the ghost say to the other ghost?" And I said "What?" "Nothing. Ghosts aren't real."

I absolutely blame Facebook for this shift. Words cannot describe how freaking WEIRD it was in the mid-00s when there was suddenly this popular website where you were required to use your real, brickspace name and encouraged to post photos of yourself. Every single bit of Standard Internet Safety prior to then said that you should never ever ever do either of those.

omg 2005/2006. When all our parents, who had been telling us for YEARS to never use our real names on the internet, suddenly all got facebook accounts and started using their real names on the internet like it was totally normal. Complete mental whiplash. Before then, it was WEIRD to use your real name on the internet. Like, people who did that were weirdos.