all that and i havent killed myself yet i must really love this stupid fucking life
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Janaina Medeiros

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@seals-are-cool
all that and i havent killed myself yet i must really love this stupid fucking life

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sexism in medicine kills people. racism in medicine kills people. fatphobia in medicine kills people. queerphobia in medicine kills people. classism in medicine kills people. ableism in medicine kills people.
do not downplay peopleâs fears about being mistreated because they are a part of a marginalised group. it is a matter of life and death and you should be angry about it.
I think part of getting better is complete ego death. Like youâre not above setting a timer for 5 minutes and focusing on a task. Youâre not above doing a very simple 3 minute workout to start. Youâre not above reading for 10 minutes a day when you first get out of your reading slump, even if you used to read for hours. Youâre not above starting slow and then building up to where you want to be/where you once were. What you are above is total inertia. Doing something really is better than doing nothing. Radically accept where you are, radically accept your limits, and go from there. Donât let your ego get in the way.
(knows nothing about a subject) I Should Start An Ambitious Project

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a small thing i learned from my sister dying is that i really would rather the people i love be a burden than be whatever the hell else they'd be if they weren't. yes even if it's messy and not always fair and hard completely inconvenient for everyone involved. even if it's weird. even if i'm rolling my eyes a bit inside sometimes. i just want you to bother me. please always bother me
like "it's rotten work" "not to me not if it's you" actually sometimes it's still rotten work. even if it's you. and i'd still do it a million times over
Today's Seals Are: Smack The Baby
I spent the afternoon arranging our books by size and color (and itâs so satisfying and looks amazing) and my partner came home and stared in shock at the bookcase and then said âiâm a librarian, you canât do this.â
him: you split up all the song of ice and fire books
me: yeah i know, theyâre all primary colors, itâs perfect
him: [self-destructs]
Youâre a monster
As a former bookstore employee, this hurts my soul. I mean, sure it looks nice, but how do you find anything?
it has occurred me during this process that apparently not everyone thinks about books by what color they are? like, literally when iâm looking for a book, i picture it in my mind. i have a veryâŚtactile experience with the books i read and idk! i thought everyone did that lol.
my partner was like âhow will i find [this book] for instanceâ and i replied âeasy, itâs purpleâ and he looked at me like i was a witch.
OP your brain is neat and I love you for it you funky little color-coded cupcake. But youâre still a monster.
This actually is interesting in terms of information-seeking behavior, which is a thing librarians think about a lot and often actually study (some library jobs require you to publish, and academic librarians, for instance, will often use the students at the college they work at to study how they search for information in order to figure out how to best provide them services).
When you go for an MLS (Masterâs of Library Science, which is a thing, and which is usually required for âprofessional-levelâ library work [which is also a weird and contentious concept that I wonât go into here]), one of the things you study is the organization of information. This deals with how to determine what a book or other material is âabout"âa concept we tongue-in-cheek call âaboutness"âand how to convey that to a potential user of the item and make it easy for them to find. Things like keywords and subject headings, do I put this book about how often wild birds attack aerial drones in with books about birds or with books about technology, if its a fictional novel do I put fantasy in itâs own section or mix it in with all of the other fiction, so on and so on.
OP is organizing books by how they would look for them. OPâs partner is thinking in terms of aboutness. This is a system that works for OP because itâs their personal library: they know basically what books they own and they only own books that are relevant to them, and if they know what the book looks like, that can be a quick way to find it.
In a library that assumes the public (or people who do not own that particular collection of books) are using the collection, that doesnât work. Books are often re-issued in multiple covers, or re-bound in new covers when they get worn out, and if the user doesnât know what the book looks like or is expecting a different cover, theyâre lost. Thatâs why non-personal libraries used standardized cataloging systems like the Dewey Decimal System or Library of Congress System to organize a book by what itâs "aboutâ, and then put books about the same or similar topics together, marked with labels and signage so a person unfamiliar with the book or collection can find their way to it.
Basically, OPâs system works for their own personal library, because itâs best suited to how the primary userâOP themselvesâlooks for books. OPâs librarian partner is coming from a background of thinking in terms of a public-facing collection, where aboutness is the key criteria and communicating it to a user unfamiliar with the collection is the priority.
And also, OP is a monster.
going on a guilt trip do yall want anything
if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask

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therapist: and what do we say when we feel like this?
me: no live organism can continue to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality
therapist: no
actually no, we're not "dating". we're bound together for infinity. like the stars. so, fuck you, actually.
u can be boiling alive in your mind for months and then on a random tuesday ur head gets so clear and life is worth living again and you're like damn what was all that about then
you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you donât kill yourself
did you know that apparently if you try to act normal the normalness doesn't come through but the acting does. and did you know apparently everyone can smell this on you like a bloodhound

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I'm a sucker for a good "you think you're in one horror subgenre but it's actually a different horror subgenre". character struggling to accept that maybe demons are tormenting them suddenly finds out it's actually aliens. trope of all time tbh