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One of my top 20 favourite human behaviours I see around is when an Object makes a sound and then a nearby human will absentmindedly imitate the sound. Parakeet coded

oh fuck this is a really good hill i gotta die on this

send this to your crush with no context

You recently moved to the countryside. Your child was playing in the woods, and came back with a large green egg you thought was plastic, so you agreed they could keep it if no one claimed it. Your kid said it was a gift. You thought nothing of it. Then the egg hatched.

This is it. The perfect writing prompt response. We can all go home.

bro not the quencies (way of saying consequences if theres something deeply wrong with you)

(drinking ice water) there is a god and he is loving

(drinking lukewarm water) there is no god but that is okay

(drinking hot water) oo owch owch yowza

Tumblr already has a personalization algorithm it's called my beloved mutuals who have great taste and only wish to psychologically damage me sometimes

The holy trinity

I'm about to wii sports resort to violence

I'm about to have a wii fit

The cum tanks by e-girl street. Yeah you can't miss them.

Item: A Terrible Idea

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Sweet pangolin baby. A little guy. A friend

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