Kris is the type of person that when you cover their mouth to shut them up they immediately start licking it.

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@scalene-triangles
Kris is the type of person that when you cover their mouth to shut them up they immediately start licking it.

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today
im so fucking stubborn
michael what the fuck.
no its one of my fancy pencils :)
the end cap comes off :)
oh lard
my son he is sick he has every disease
we are nearing peak deviancy
happy back-to-school day
im so clever that its sickening
if i breathe wrong i'll lose him
it got too small for the clip. luckily i realized this eraser has the perfect holes
at what point does this stop being a pencil
Tags via @mik-mania
friend whos always planning everything: hey guys lets do something this week!! when are you all available?
friend whos always available: i can do whenever
friend whos constantly busy: im sorry i have work and then school and then the labyrinth and then more work :( i can do tuesday at 3:00 am for five minutes tho
friend with the randomly generated sleep schedule: (no response)
friend who went missing in the woods behind their house 12 years ago and hasn't been heard from since: (no response)
friend whos really into genshin impact: does anyone want to play genshin impact

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Pokemon headcanon that once Absol are studied and people realize they prevent disasters instead of causing them, particularly dangerous workplaces get themselves a workplace Absol and it also decreases accidents.
Construction sites and fishing ships and factories will have one that pretty much just lazes about until it just gets up howling one day and knocks a dude down. They almost never figure out what would have happened but they're always like "yes absol thank you absol I am so grateful to be on the floor right now. Can I offer you a treat in this trying time"
Diversity win! Absol is OSHA Compliant!
@osha-official-the-sequel
@bedrock-to-buildheight I thought about your PokƩmon au when I saw this today
I legally must add them. For safety
Anyone remember Dumb Ways To Die. Like they really made a 3 minute long music video of cute cartoon characters killing themselves in humorously fucked up ways solely as an elaborate PSA about being safe around trains and then made a fucking series of mobile games based around it and we all just let them. Will kids today ever understand how fucking legendary that was. Will they ever know.
A true krusie shipper NEVER speaks ill of suselle or kriselle
Your artstyle is like your gut microbiome in the way its everything you consume and like and it also has all your bacteria up in it. Thats probably how that works

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i knew it from the start
That video of Alex Hirsch reading S&P notes for Gravity Falls conveys a few things to me:
1) the U.S. entertainment industry (especially animation) is run by older conservative types who make up offensive terms and get really mad about them.
2) the people who run Disney would be the first to fall in line with a fascist regime.
3) most of the media we consume is tailor-made and watered-down to appeal to the tastes of older, deeply religious conservative audiences.
4) conservatism, not the left, is and always has been the biggest voice of censorship in American culture.
J. Michael Straczynski, creator of Babylon 5, was before that a producer and writer for a number of cartoons in the late ā80s/early ā90s (The Real Ghostbusters and the original She-Ra, most notably). After a few years of dealing with the censors and their obsession with finding Satanism (or at least looking for Satanism to further political agendas) he wrote an article about the whole corrupt and bullshit system.
And published it in Penthouse, to force those same censors to buy a skin mag. The editor there asked, why Penthouse?
That one is from his autobiography, Becoming Superman. See also:
(As he goes on to say, heās never worked in animation againāheās effectively been blacklisted by the cartoon industry.)
Every time something like this comes up, I remember two stories about making media. The first is about movies, and comes from Quentin āFeet Manā Tarantino.
When he was making Pulp Fiction, he was worried that the MPAA would object to the high level of violence in the film, so he shot a bunch of extra-gory stuff that he didnāt actually want in the film, and added it in before submitting it to the MPAA. Predictibly, they asked him to cut most of it (without even commenting on some of the things that had him worried, like the bits of Marvinās skull that lodge in Samuel L. Jacksonās hairpiece). The resultant cuts were actually more permissive than heād expected, so he cut a little more and submitted it, and it got passed with an R.
The second story is about that artist on Morrowind whose name escapes me (Iām not a big ES fan tbh) who figured out that if he made two creature designs, one weird and what he wanted, and one even weirder, he could get Todd Howard to agree to just about anything by showing him the whopper first, then going back and āworkingā for another few hours on a second, ātoned-downā version, and it worked every time.
The reason I bring these up is that the thing that drives censors isnāt some extant physical rubrick of what is and isnāt acceptable, itās the idea that they can have absolute power over someone elseās creative work. Itās about the social dominance of the interaction.
There is nothing so innocent, so clean, that a censor will not find some fault with it. Because they must find something wrong with it to justify their existence, and because it makes them feel powerful.
This is true of all censorship.
Zoozve, my beloved
"...we don't live in a big clockwork, we live in a dance club..."
This is my favorite line.
It is now called Zoozve :')

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Caught myself spiraling and then remembered it's just my body not wanting to exist in these temperatures
I wish wizards were real so bad imagine coming out of a wal mart and seeing some guy with long robes and a big hat in the parking lot surrounded by wacky particle effects screaming some shit like "By the moon and the starlight, by the shield and the sword, I summon to me, my Honda Accord!" And then just getting into his car and driving off
so there's basically two reasons he would need to do this and they're both funny
his magical honda unsummoned while he was in Walmart; this means it's not even a real car and could look like anything and he picked or was forced somehow to pick a Honda Accord
his normal honda was left someplace while he came to Walmart by other means, and he can teleport the car to him more easily than he can teleport himself places
there's also the idea that he drove to walmart in his honda accord, and then when he got out he either forgot where he parked or wanted to skip like 20 seconds of walking so he just summons it right in front of the door
To not have to find a parking space, most wizards keep their Honda Accords in a extradimensional oubliette when not driving. This also saves on garage space.
Clearly the wizard had to summon his Honda Accord because someone stole it while he was shopping. The carjacker is now tumbling violently down the freeway like a source engine ragdoll