not all those who wander are lost but i sure am

Looking for my Tolkien fanfiction? Find a list of my Rings of Power, Lord of the Rings Online, and Silmarillion stories and prompt fills below or read them on AO3!

Interested in reading my Marvel, Doctor Who, or other fic from 2011-2022? Check out this masterpost on dreamwidth.

ty! i love stealing song lyrics for my working titles and then coming up with a weird final title out of stress.

"necromance" is a vague idea i had for a fic where celebrimbor (blorbo of the year) is resurrected by sauron (who gets to do some actual necromancy, bc i said so). the inspiration is wuthering heights & hozier.

i wrote a few very purple, very poetic paragraphs and then got distracted by crackfic, but as it won't leave me, i think i'll return to it eventually!! i honestly forgot i had even written anything until i saw the doc.

*

There is so much he has forgotten about being alive.

Breath comes easily -- what is breath but air? What is a pulse but a rhythm of rushing blood?

It would be too cold to dance on the wind, if he remembered the cold. It would be painful still to see what he has lost, to watch the years pass and those he love pass on. They do, each of them passing him by, to go where he cannot. To find the love he will always deny himself the memory of.

*

The Shadow cannot remember where the bones were laid to rest, or if they were at all. He remembers images: tattered fabric flapping in the wind, flayed skin drying in the heat of the sun, the carrion birds that did not dare to land close enough to taste, the white bursting through soft, rotting flesh. He wanders the fields for endless days that seem to pass so slowly, he wonders if he is even moving.

He doesn’t know how he finds the right place to dig. The earth is packed clay and still half frozen from the winter, but his scarred hands feel neither the cold nor the pain. There is so little feeling inside his limbs. The bones are still sunbleached when he wipes away the dirt.

*

The body remembers. The soul has forgotten.

*

Some spells are so old that they are not spells, not even words, only song, song before music and song before rhythm. The bones lay scattered on the stone hearth before him and he sings to them, full of doubt. Are they enough? He prays that they are, and that they are not, but he does not know who he prays to.

There is a voice on the wind that he has long known and tries to ignore. He cannot ignore it now. He welcomes it to him.

i know it's probably taboo to talk about original stories on here, but i'll probably never actually finish this.

"toxic yuri brainrot" started with me going "i wish narmeleth/amarthiel (from LOTRO) had a girlfriend" to "i guess you could half-reasonably ship her with celebrian" to "this idea is so far removed from canon that there's no serial numbers to file off. i could write a story about an evil sorceress and princess. done and done!"

no i'm not writing a sequel:

at one point i had a really vivid vision in my mind of a fic in the LOTRO verse, about antheron and celebrimbor breaking up immediately after getting together, but being unable to actually stay broken up. and i wrote exactly one third of the first scene before i sprayed myself with a bottle of water like a cat on the counter and told myself to write some silm verse instead, for once.

anyways, here's the funny bit:

“I think we need to set some ground rules,” Celebrimbor says.

“Ground rules,” Antheron repeats, because he has found Celebrimbor is comforted when he thinks Antheron is listening to him. He presses his lips against Celebrimbor’s neck.

“Yes. For instance: no kissing in the forge,” Celebrimbor says, extricating himself from Antheron’s arms. Antheron scowls. “It’s unwise to be so distracted around hot metal and sharp objects!” Celebrimbor protests.

“You hardly leave the forge!” Antheron protests.

“Then perhaps your challenge is to lure me out of it,” Celebrimbor replies, ignoring the dark look Antheron gives in response.

maybe one day...? but probably not.

***

the sailor, the seabird, and the smith

this is an expansion of the prompt fill i wrote last winter, exploring TROP celebrimbor in the first age.

i just have this image in my mind of celebrimbor with baby elrond and elros, and i want to try to explain how he knew earendil because it makes zero sense to me! i know it's hinted in UT that celebrimbor was in gondolin, but that doesn't quite mesh, because surely he met him as an adult!

and can you imagine our bitchy TROP brimby meeting elwing??? and where was he during the kinslaying?!? i have questions!! anyways.

my main issue is that i can't write it without celebrimbor seeming a little in love with earendil, and that's not where i was going with it, but he does wax poetic about him for a little too long in TROP.

Elwing sighs. “You have grown cynical. Perhaps I should not have shown you the Silmaril. You are not bound by it, but it is a curse upon you all the same.”

“It is a curse and a blessing on us all,” Celebrimbor says. "Show me it has moved hearts -- for the better, for all of our sakes -- and perhaps I will have reason to hope. But do not leave me here, Eärendil, friendless and alone, waiting for the swords of my kin to find me, and tell me that I must hope in the darkness alone.”

Eärendil rests a hand on Celebrimbor’s shoulder. “You will not be alone,” he says. “Your fate is tied to my son’s, and that gives me comfort.”

Celebrimbor’s mouth parts in surprise.

RULES: make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous, and tag as many people as you have WIPs. People send an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and you post a snippet or tell them something about it.

oh no, i have a truly unfortunate amount of drafts. :') one of these has been sitting in my WIP folder since 2014 and i dutifully copy it over each year, maybe you'll find out which one it is!

like the moon we borrow our light

The Forgotten Poems

antiparallel (silm traditional silvergifting narrative)

the sailor the seabird and the smith

road to ruin

necromance

Alloyed (remix)

she walks in starlight

no im not writing a sequel NO IM NOT

toxic yuri brainrot