As hard and as ruthless as a rose petal

you're my nothing and to some extent my something

don't let being born a girl stop you from being the man your father never was

i dont care how amazing that devil is this came organically from my mind

Jabberwocks are starting to really intrude on the territory of the Snallygaster and crowd them out. Please report when you see them and help preserve our American monsters!

Biologists prefer the term “fearsome critters”, just FYI. They resemble monsters but only due to convergent evolution.

there's only 7 words on the painting and you managed to misspell the two largest ones

Maybe the most damming thing about Nolans odyssey is i haven’t seen a single gifset from it

you're my nothing and to some extent my something

while you were busy jacking off & cumming hard. it rained outside beautifully

what do you think i was jacking off to...?

Incredible cover art! This belongs in every graphic designer's inspiration folder

Usually when the electrician goes 'hey.... there's something you should see' it's because someone set up shoddy wiring. This time it was because he pulled two snakes out of my wall

lets touch our antennae together. i don’t care anymore. i just wanna feel you. i don’t care that it’s not allowed or it’s weird. fuck the colony. let’s go off into the long grass where no one can find us and touch antennae. just you and me

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.

Wow there sure are comments in my comments section.