As hard and as ruthless as a rose petal

Usually when the electrician goes 'hey.... there's something you should see' it's because someone set up shoddy wiring. This time it was because he pulled two snakes out of my wall

lets touch our antennae together. i don’t care anymore. i just wanna feel you. i don’t care that it’s not allowed or it’s weird. fuck the colony. let’s go off into the long grass where no one can find us and touch antennae. just you and me

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.

Wow there sure are comments in my comments section.

Any ship can be problematic if you just give me a second-

i do wonder how mamdani would have solved a problem like the green goblin

do you love the colour of this thigh (bruise)

i’m so strattpilled at this point that i get genuinely taken aback when people don’t gaf about her. this is in no way a moral issue i’m just actually insane. like every time i read a fic about like idk rocky picking grace’s nose or some shit that has absolutely nothing to do with her at all i go wow. can’t wait til they get to the bit where they explore the Strimplications (stratt implications) they are so clearly building towards

and he loved those fucking kids. he spent too long on that aircraft carrier being an actual scientist, THAT was his problem. flying him to and from sanfran would've taken too long but they wouldn't have needed the amnesia drugs and the sedation anymore, just put his ass in front of those kids again and make him look them in the eye and see if he can still say no without throwing up in his mouth

#and you know what? maybe he would've said it still. but he WOULD have thrown up#and it would've eaten him alive and genuinely genuinely it would've ruined the rest of his miserable life on earth#more than the apocalypse he signed the planet up for ever could#grace can only distance ignore avoid his way out of his problems so far#make him look cáceres in the eye. make him TRY to teach her everything he knows for those three days#wrap his hand around the trolley lever grab him by the hair and force his head to look at what he's doing

In every way this is set up to be a joke like any other short video, it even uses the trope of main character in a wig to represent their mom, but it isn't funny at all. It's just sweet and nice