dead space

I say as my shield rips

Is this a point of giving up?

Is it a begging of the end and loss?

Im not strong enough right now

But I'll be here

I will watch you all leave

It will hurt, hopefully just me this time

You shouldn't have to endure who i am

As all i am is a wreck of wrongdoings,

The reflection desperate for approval curses my mind

Wishing that it might just once bring a smile to this face

My body weeps under the weight of it's last strengths as I collapse

And it was recently that i found out

I never wanted to need anyone

It wasn't love or poetry

It was a problem

It is a constant purgatory of love and hate

And it's only and just my fault

The more you think of it

The more it eats you up

Because when they all leave,

All the ones you wish you didn't need,

That this world drenched in sorrow

Is our home

Love so compromised

Or maybe the way I spoke

But mostly the mess we make

As we grow old

Why do they always forget me

If I'm not the first one to call

What coud be so wrong with me