ryuyoo

him being the baby of the family, the middle child, and the older brother at different stages in his life

the intense disdain frank has for him that immediately marks him as different from the rest of his siblings

how that differentness follows him throughout his entire life and only gets worse and worse because 1) he's gay 2) he's not frank's biological son 3) he's bipolar 4) he's the only one who truly mourns monica

how he had goals and ambitions and was working hard to achieve them but he failed because of things outside his control

how he reached out to monica twice when his life was falling apart and the first time it led to him becoming an underaged sex worker living in a crack house with her (and yet she still abandoned him there) while the second time she took him to her boyfriend's place where he was running a meth lab (and that boyfriend immediately turned abusive toward ian)

that ian was so smart he tested out of one of his english classes and later passed his EMT exam with such a good score that his boss commented on it (presumably he also first-tried his GED like debbie before that)

the wild casting of his real dad even matching his height, something they could have never predicted

how ian deals with his problems alone, alone, alone because no one sees past his masking (until mickey)

how he rescues and changes the lives of two of terry's kids

how terry tries to kill him multiple times, never guessing that one day it would be ian left in charge of hiring his nurse

ian, reaching out for help for once in his life and asking lip for a place to stay. getting rejected. attaching himself to the first man who is nice to him. that man is married (he was doing his job). attaching himself to the next man who is nice to him (he was asking ian to play baseball). (ian living in the milkovich house of horrors, happy.)

ian counting the years he's been with mickey and it's every moment since he was 15, even the moments when he was with someone else

ian, cocky and bold, so easily played like a fiddle by mickey

"calm yourself, daniel. your heart's racing. it frightens me."

"[...] i'd rather die than see you die, daniel."

"you think that you can drive me crazy, don't you?"

"[...] what are you? an immortal idiot?"

"you don't think it terrifies me? [...] how many years do i have? can you tell just by looking at me? tell me."

"then the realization had come to daniel as they stood together in the ruined dining room [...]: he isn't going to kill me after all. he isn't going to do it."

"daniel stared hard at the creature before him, this thing that looked human and sounded human but was not. there was a horrid shift in his consciousness; he saw this being like a great insect, a monstrous evil predator who had devoured a million human lives. and yet he loved this thing."

"you're dying," armand said softly.

" 'and though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death, et cetera,' daniel whispered."

"[...] what is this, tears? you're going to weep over me?"

"damn you, daniel."

"[...] i don't want you to die."

"[...] because i am a coward. and i love you too much to let you go."

Bruce and Dick watching Jason laugh and smile like he used to (before he died) and looking at Roy like he’s an actual wizard. Roy walks away and Jason’s face hardens into its usual self.

Dick: Marry him.

Roy: What?

Dick: MARRY MY BROTHER. PLEASE. He loves you. He loves you so much.

Anon, monogamy is not a thing and will never be a thing with these relationships. Their love transcends human notions or restrictions. What makes Loustat endgame is not a frilly little human promise to be monogamous. No, what makes them endgame is the fact they are it for each other and when I say that, I mean in the sense that they would not survive each other. Their love is fatal. Monogamy has zero to do with any of that.

For one, their relationship was not left open-ended. Their endgame was set up in Prince Lestat and fully established in Prince Lestat And The Realms Of Atlantis when Louis finally made peace with himself and accepted Lestat’s invitation to be his consort. The definition of a consort is the spouse or companion of a ruling monarch. Loustat is shown to be a family unit with the addition of Viktor and Rose. It is their second chance at parenthood, coming full-circle after the tragedy with Claudia in which no one else shared that specific grief and guilt but them.

David fades to the background once Louis is at the Court. He is still around, acting as Lestat’s friend and brother and also Louis’ friend and brother. But no, I would not categorize Lestat as “still taken” with him. That relationship became strained, to put it simply, after the events of Merrick. It was vaguely hinted as to why by Lestat in Prince Lestat and if you know what happens to Louis in Merrick while under David’s care, you know what is happening there between the lines.

Trying to find Louis a friend? That would be Mitka aka Dmitri Fontayne. Mitka sent a letter from New Orleans in which he appeals to Lestat for help in ridding the territory of a group of rogue vampires. Those same vampires had also broken into Rue Royale and destroyed one of Louis’ paintings. Lestat, furious when anyone hurts Louis and wishing to help Mitka, takes off for New Orleans to destroy the rogues and meet up with him. When Lestat meets Mitka, he immediately clocks that he’s interested in the same books and authors as Louis and has the same intellectual thoughts as Louis, and Lestat says he wanted to tell him a great deal about Louis and knew Louis would love him. It was not a matter of Lestat “trying to find Louis a friend.” It was a matter of Lestat loving Louis enough to know his interests and likes/dislikes and knowing Louis would get along with him. It goes back to the fact Lestat always felt he was intellectually inferior to Louis. Lestat, who was kept illiterate by his family on purpose until vampirism granted him the ability to read and write, tells of a small moment in Blood Communion in which he lets it be known that Louis reads to him. Do you see the significance of that? In the past, Louis used books, like Gabrielle, to shut Lestat out. Now, Louis engages with Lestat about literature and actually shares his passions with Lestat. He reads to him. You see, that’s the sign of a truly bonded, heathy relationship. There is no jealousy, no competition, no threat to their love or what they mean to each other simply because they have friends.

You mentioned someone else Lestat was “in love with”? That would be his architect, Alain, and yes. Lestat turns him. However, that is not meant to replace Louis nor does it have any bearing on the fact Louis is still Lestat’s consort. Louis is still the one sharing blood with Lestat. Louis is still the one sleeping in their chambers with Lestat. Louis is still the one who knows what Lestat can’t confide to anyone else. Louis is the one whom Lestat says he is closer to than any other visible being in existence. Louis is the one Rhoshamandes abducts, because he wants Lestat to feel the same pain he felt when his beloved Benedict was allowed to end himself before the Court. He sends Lestat a box of ashes containing Louis’ emerald ring, and Lestat emotionally shuts down completely at that point. He literally says it’s as if he no longer has a heart once Louis is gone. He pitifully asks Gregory “Why didn’t he take me?” He would lay down his life if it meant protecting Louis.

That is why they are endgame, Anon. It has nothing to do with being monogamous or cheating or jealousy or any of that crap. It is because Louis is Lestat’s heart. Louis is Lestat’s home. They are finally at peace with themselves, fully sharing their lives (and blood) together in a reunion Lestat calls “enduring.” As both Sam and Jacob have reiterated, they are endgame. They are married by the end as blood spouses, eternal companions joined by a cord who always come home to each other. It’s not something we just “think.” It is literally what’s written in the books. They are feverishly and maniacally in love with each other and simply cannot exist without each other. Louis is Lestat’s person, and Anne was very clear about that.

If you are interested in more, allow me to link you my Loustat masterlist:

Loustat’s Transcendent Love

Louis Is Lestat’s Consort

Lestat Seeking Out Louis

Loustat’s Marriage

Loustat’s Implied Marriage & The Emerald Ring

Loustat Is Endgame

Loustat Is Not Toxic

Louis’ Love For Lestat

Loustat’s Journey To Acceptance

It Was Always Louis

Loustat: One Depends Upon The Other

Loustat Fights For Each Other

Prince Lestat Era Loustat

Louis Is Lestat’s Religion

Louis Is Lestat’s Home

Lestat’s Reaction When Louis Is Taken In Blood Communion

Lestat’s Reaction Upon Finding Louis In Blood Communion

Lestat’s Jealousy

Lestat’s Amazement

Lestat’s Strained Relationship With David

Why David Disappears In Prince Lestat Era

Lestat’s Reaction To Louis’ Suicide Attempt

Loustat’s Separation After Merrick

Lestat’s Love For Others

Loustat’s Family Unit

Blood Communion Dance Foreshadowed In 1x07

ETA:

Lestat’s Soulmate

Louis Wanted Lestat To Be His God

Lestat Feels He Failed In Protecting Louis

Louis Does Love Lestat

Why Lestat Loves Louis

“They’re each other’s endgame, aren’t they? In the books, they always come home to each other, and it’s kind of telling that that seems to be sort of, like, the end of a lot of the novels is Louis and Lestat being petty and in love, you know?”

— Jacob Anderson

(An analysis by scrunchietown)

Here's Part 1 if you missed it.

omg yes i love this!!! okay keep in mind that probably most of these i’m coming up with on the spot but we still stan.

1. blaine is a die hard katy perry stan. i don’t make the rules. but he probably has been to one of her concerts at least once. ESPECIALLY in the warbler days and went to her teenage dream tour when she had the whole happy candyland thing going on with the lollipop bra (i think teenage dream was what it was called??? i don’t know enough about katy perry). and he still listens to her new singles now and is really excited she’s pregnant 

2. blaine has family problems. i feel like they hinted this so much in cannon

3. kurt would get famous writing shitty wattpad fanfiction (he’s probably written some lets b real)

4. kurt would do fashion as a job rather than acting - i feel like his whole energy at vogue was so cool

5. the amount of hairgel blaine wore each series reflected his stress. like in season two he was more chill with meeting kurt etc and being with his besties and then as things got more crazy (eg season 4/5) he has to keep some sense of normality or something (i’ve forgotten the words but i hope you get what i mean) in his life because everything else is out of control so he needs to feel like he has control of something... my babie :(

6. blaine still keeps in touch with his warbler friends. i’m really sad that they didn’t make some of the warblers blaine’s main friends tbh... they were like the pontipines from in the night garden... they kinda just existed in a massive group but we never got to know them LMAO

7. nick and jeff from the warblers are together. and yes this is inspired by ‘a fresh start’ by pickingviolets. they were cute together in it i don’t make the rules. niff are endgame periodt. and they’d be like unproblematic high school sweethearts :’)

8. blaine’s family is like... uptight, old money. tom buchanan vibe (but not as bad as him jesus) they probably also own horses and play polo. i feel this

9. BLAINE HAS AN EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TO NOVELTY KITCHEN APPLIANCES. AND HE’S USING HIS SODASTREAM NOW AS WE SPEAK IN THE GLEE UNIVERSE IN LOCKDOWN AND KURT PROBABLY GETS V ANGRY AT HIM FOR IT

10. kurt loves cats. this is mostly bc chris loves cats but they definitely have to own a pet of some sort when they have a family (klaine i mean)

11. kurt has some form of ocd/anxiety and also went through depression when he was being bullied in season 1/2

12. if blaine was a teenager in 2020 he would be an indie boy because i literally do not know one teenager who would wear bowties in this day and age. and i know this was to make his character more defined but his whole personality already fitted the indie vibe so like pls can we just change his hair and clothes a bit

13. dalton is a boarding school (lets just add on to the whole blangst family problems where they don’t really make an effort to keep in touch with him) 

14. when they become famous (so 2020) blaine DEFINITELY reads fanfictions of him and kurt. he’s probably read the really long emotional ones (eg. atog, in my place) and there has been real tears. then kurt catches him and blaine’s just happy that nothing that tragic has happened to them 

15. kurt probably is really stressed about lockdown whereas blaine’s more laid back and enjoys being inside

16. their baby would be a girl who is hella talented and has lovely curly hair (blaine and rachel’s genes) because of blaine’s curly hair. also i feel like when she’s older she’d get so annoyed at kurt because he probably wants to have a big say in her fashion choices. “sweetie, i love you very much... but patterned leggings and skirts are just not acceptable anymore. come on, you’re 12.” but he’s also a very good dad and is really good at teaching her important stuff about feminism and equality etc. i feel like blaine is a way more laid back dad whereas kurt is more strict

17. so many girls try and hit on blaine but he’s like soz lmao i’m married to a man

Hmmm, interesting question, nonny! :)

I think there are some general things that would have been neat to see...

How about a beach episode? Glee never really did summer related things, which is a shame. I feel like it was always eternally winter at McKinley.

I would have liked to have seen a better alternative Christmas episode if they were really forced into doing one for Season 5. Like, c'mon, go bonkers wild with it. PUC just.... well, I think most of you know how I feel about it.

How was there never an episode that takes place all in one night where they're all up for whatever reason.

I get production stuff limited things, but the school felt claustrophobic after a while -- outside of going to New York and back, there weren't road trips, or just things that happened outside.

Send Klaine and Brittana on a double date - that would have been fun. Or, I mean, just put them them on anything together, and it would have been interesting.

I think, in general, Glee had a tendency to stick to dynamics and pairings that they thought worked well, and missed opportunities to wild and crazy things. What's a Mercedes and Blaine story line look like? What happens when Kurt and Artie spend time together?

I think for Kurt and Blaine, there are moments I'd have seen over arcs or plot lines?

Let Blaine have an actual conversation with his mother.

More Cooper -- he needed to come back for an episode

I'd have rewritten a lot of the wedding episode

Blaine's journey back to going to school (college)

Any kind of reflective conversation post any of their big milestones

Remember in 1x02 when Louis apologized to Daniel for his "outburst", but the "outburst" was just a literal lone tear? Because that's how much Armand had broken Louis' spirit and tampered down Louis' real emotions and had brainwashed Louis into thinking showing his emotions would be an inappropriate "outburst"?

Remember in 2x08 when Louis reunited with Lestat, and he couldn't contain himself and began sobbing in Lestat's arms, because he's always been able to be himself with Lestat and show his true emotions just like in 1x01 when Lestat revealed Louis would cry at the operas and only showed that part of himself to Lestat while hiding it from everyone else?

Remember in 1x01 when Louis said Lestat made him feel seen for the first time in his life?

Sick fic

Episode reaction

Original main (non children) characters

(Single) parents

♡

Sick Fic

C: Neutral. A good author might be able to sell it, but a bad one will kill it deader than dead.

The emotional side of being taken care of (especially when a character is used to taking car of themselves)??? AMAZING LOVE LOVE LOVE IT! But I think the part where they're actually sick can put me off lmao especially if its overly gross. it might be ecause i was raised in a medical professional family lol

Episode Reaction

D: Not my favorite. I avoid it if I can, but it won’t necessarily put me off reading something.

This is mostly because Glee is over and I have HeadCanons and Theories that i am VERY attacjed to bc they've been marinating in my head for like a decade lmao

Original Main (Non-Children) Characters

C: Neutral. A good author might be able to sell it, but a bad one will kill it deader than dead

Depends on the character, their role, the writing, etc! BUT I see a lot of potential with them for sure!

(Single) Parents

A: Love it. Spend my time combing AO3 for it.

YO SO i used to haaaaate Dads!Klaine AUs or like single parent AUs, especially when I was younger but something has changed within me..... somehting is NOT the same??? And I can NOT get enough of it now!

Thanks for the ask! I'm sharing this as -my perspective only- and each person, of course, can headcanon as they please. I am incredibly passionate about this subject and trope, and I could write about another 100k words.

A true dominant 'doms' out of service, love, and compassion for their sub or fellow human being. It's not born entirely of ego or acted on in a need to control others and/or some magical intelligence that makes them better at making decisions or being in charge. Although, that doesn't exclude the possibility that they might be those things. Someone should not be labeled a dom simply because they have the ability to be strong, just as someone should not be labeled submissive because they have the ability to surrender (and I always use the word surrender as a sacred, consenting action).

In the fewest words possible, a dom/sub relationship is a trust so profound that they trust someone to be what they need. Sometimes as a sub, that is the dom making a decision for them, sometimes it's holding their hand, sometimes it's asking them to kneel so they can go deep within, sometimes it's pain (like edging or crops etc if the dom/sub pair is into that) because they feel so numb in this world that they're begging their dom to help them feel something. It can be anything and everything as they explore what they each need, but it is never about power/and the powerless. There must be consent, understanding, and a safe way out for both parties if desired.  The surrender is all about letting go, surrendering so you can find that thing you need, whether it's ethereal or tangible. It's trusting that the other can provide it (either the dom or sub). A dom's true satisfaction comes from knowing that they are accomplishing the giving and the helping (this can come in various forms that people outside the scene might not understand).

I don't know the intention behind other author's takes, they are vast and varied. I speak only for myself, when I say there are dozens of reasons why I think that Kurt and Blaine each exhibit both tendencies at different times. I don't only see Kurt as a dom, just as I don't only see Blaine as a sub. I can observe that in different circumstances, they each take up different roles. They each have strengths and weaknesses, and they both need help at different times. They are each brilliantly divine and magnificently flawed, as we all are. And that's why I love AUs. I love to take these complex characters and say. "Okay, what if this one thing was different or that thing? What then?"

I go into DEEP character studies in my D/s stories. If you've ever wanted to try one, I promise you they aren't what you're used to in this trope. They are always equals. Always loved and always safe with each other (out in the world is a different thing altogether). 

Just One Look dom Blaine and sub Kurt This one is about Kurt fighting his submissive instincts (he has no idea what they are), and when he realizes why he's having them, everything changes when Blaine discusses in great detail what a dom/sub relationship actually is. 

Since Sense Sensory dom Kurt and sub Blaine Explores how the boys found each other again after a long separation. They have many conversations about how the dom/sub scene has helped them overcome grief and loss and manage their strengths and weaknesses. 

Soulsons and Seatstars dom Kurt and sub Blaine (with hints of dom Blaine) Is an AU world where a natural chemical balance is needed. A dom cannot live without a sub, and a sub cannot live without a dom (that's an oversimplification), so if you are new to dom/sub, this is an interesting take because it helps you better understand the symbiotic relationship in tangible terms. Again, they talk so much about their dynamics. And this one might surprise you how Blaine might be a sub, but he's got a sassy tongue and a dom streak that Kurt very much encourages. 

Nonny, I say this with the sincerest amount of love that I have (no really, I love that you have sent this to me, and I think you are amazing <3)

How in the world would I even begin to know this??

Does anyone know Chris and Darren's favorite colors? Where's @snarkyhag she could probably answer this. @slayerkitty - where are you, we've been talking color theory.

Okay, so one thing I will say is that you can do a lot of fun color theory stuff with the two of them. One thing Glee actually did well was costume design, and they knew how to dress their actors (a majority of the time). Something they did in the back half of the series is match Kurt and Blaine. A lot. Even when they weren't together, they tended to match the two of them -- often reflecting their engagement colors (blues/purples for Kurt and oranges/whites for Blaine).

Something that kind of helps -- Chris looks really good in darker, cooler solid colors -- blues, greens, purples. Sure, he does occasionally wear a deep red or go black and white. Meanwhile, Darren can really pull off warmer colors such as yellows, oranges, and brighter reds. This helped the costumers because they could wear contrasting colors and still match relatively well. And one reason I think they looked so good together on screen.

Wearing their engagement colors (a thread)...

You can not go wrong with blues on Kurt (Chris); reds on Blaine (Darren)

Honestly, this is a huge topic that I really could go on and on with because it is truly amazing that, starting around season 4, they did their best to really let Klaine match. And it was amazing. <3

We can’t be certain that we have the same idea of what constitutes a soft fic, but we’ve done our best to give you a nice selection (by no means complete) with various pairings here to start you off, both in the previous recs, and in the main body of the post.  Really, we could have listed so much more adorableness in fic form! - S

Previous recs:

Long soft fics here

Cute and happy andreil here

Fave super fluffy andreil* here

Long-distance soft Nerik here

Short fluffy Jerejean here

Post-canon Jerejean fluff here

Fluffy kandreil here

Soft high school aus here

Less well known soft andreil/kandreil here

Dan/Matt & soft renison here

... and for fics with a romcom feel look here

‘his elastic life’ here

‘Foxhaven’ here

‘This Complicated Life’ here

‘Change of Scenery’ here

‘coming loose’ here

‘Point Nemo’ here

‘waiting up for better things’ and ‘00:00 (Zero o'Clock)’ here

‘best thing’ here

‘Petal-shaped epiphanies’ here

*NB: check out our new staff faves tag to see other asks for our faves!

Andreil:

(lift me higher) let me look at the sun by MmArgent, queersardonicrat [Rated T, 18936 words, complete, Aftg Mixtape Exchange 2021]

A rustling noise, followed by the tschick of a lighter. Beyond the netting, the flame lights up a face for a short moment, igniting a cigarette. Andrew pushes down. Click. He already knows it’s a good picture.

---

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action

Soft Andreil headcanon by @smol-midgets [tumblr, 2021]

The first thing that comes to mind when I think of soft andreil

Andreil & Kevaaron

Life's a Beach by Stjosten [Rated T, 17984 words, complete, 2020]

Kevin comes back to Palmetto after two years away with a familiar face in tow. Aaron is a mess, Wymack is trying his best, and Andrew really doesn't want to have to see Neil Josten's face ever again. It's too bad he doesn't have much choice in the matter.

or a surfing/beach town au with a whole lot of pining

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: drug use

the one with all the ships series by Welikesandalwood [Rated T/E, Collection, Incomplete, Updated 2021]

Part 1: The one where Andriel get Cats [T, 3696 Words, Complete]

"We did not canoodle for at least the first year," countered Andrew.

“you were the little spoon" Neil wasn't backing down on this.

"big words coming from a bottom," a smirk in Andrew's voice.

Neil’s cheek’s flushed, “Power bottom.”

Andrew smiled at this, "shh, not in front of the kid's," he said quietly, gently stroking the now sleeping kittens.

Part 2: The one with Kevaaron [E, 29161 Words, Complete]

“I’m asking,” Aaron says confidently

“what?” Kevin asks quizzically

“you promised Andrew you wouldn’t touch me again unless I asked” Kevin makes eye contact with him at that, his pupils dilating, “I’m asking”

tw: alcohol, tw: violence, tw: knives

Some kevaaron headcanons by @whatareyoudoingwithamaserati [tumblr, 2020]

For the amazing @leoisgayforwriting because he gave me an idea and then next thing you know here I am!

Kandreil:

since we've no place to go by justadreamfox [Rated T, 8430 words, complete 2020, AFTG Exchange]

Neil is already regretting the decision to spend his winter break alone at The Snarky Fox Inn, but then a snowstorm blows in along with Kevin and Andrew, and, well - maybe there's some Christmas magic to be had after all.

Jerejean:

The Smell Of Honey by lilaliacs [Rated T, 11601 words, complete, 2017]

Martha's was a cozy little coffee shop that always smelled of honey, lilacs and something that couldn't be described as anything less than home.

And that's what it was to Jeremy, who had spent his childhood sat on a stool at the tiny bar, coloring in the patterns of the menus, or watching his mother creating the most beautiful cakes and pastries that he had ever seen.

tw: panic attacks

Jerejean fake dating au part 1, Jerejean fake dating part 2 and Jerejean fake dating part 3 by @wesawbears [tumblr, 2016]

Jeremy Knox is a bad idea.

Jean knows this because all Jeremy has to do is smile at him and Jean is prepared to hand him the entire world on a platter. It’s an exaggeration of course- Jean has lines, things he can’t or won’t give. He just knows Jeremy would never cross them, knows that Jeremy is so different from everyone who’s hurt Jean in the past.

Renison:

Love You a Latte by ceilingfan5 [Rated G, 8465 words, complete, AFTG Exchange 2017]

Allison's favorite barista is adorable Renee, so when she gets the news that she has to go on a terrible family vacation and bring an "appropriate plus-one", she decides to finally get herself uninvited from the rest of those events for all eternity. She and Renee go together, pretending to be a very much in love couple, stir shit up, and leave a lot closer than they ever expected.

tw: homophobia 

make me a cradle, hold me instead by IzzyAguecheek [Not Rated, 26135 words, complete, 2021]

Of course, being the nice rich aunt was still being an aunt, so Allison got the boring stuff too, like babysitting so Matt and Dan could have a date night, and changing diapers, and picking David up from school every now and then, but she didn’t mind it as much as she’d expected to. It seemed like a fair price to pay for the undying and devoted love of a five year-old.

She specially didn’t mind picking him up at school.

Specially with his kindergarten teacher looking the way she looked.

tw: alcohol, tw: past drug use

Art

Soft jerejean aesthetic by @palmettofoxden [tumblr, 2017]

Renison art by @secondus [tumblr, 2017]

List your top 5 fics ranked by kudos on AO3. are you surprised by what’s most popular to your readers? then provide your ranking of your personal top 5 fics, and tag a few fellow writers!

Thanks for the tag @mostlymaudlin ! tagging @jingerhead @paradoxolotl @exy-shmexy @storiesnstardust

Top 5 (by Kudos):

1. Call Me By Your Name (3.9k, andreil)  

Basically, Neil calls Andrew “baby” in his sleep once, so Andrew  gets flustered and then secretly tries out different pet names for Neil.

This one… honestly really surprised me with how popular it got. It’s my most kudos’d fic by a long shot (2,378 kudos??? insanity). It’s a short little thing, entirely focused around andreil and pet names. To be honest, I have mixed feelings about this one being the top fic, because it’s one of my oldest fics and I don’t really love the prose now. I don’t really understand why it got so popular out of everything I wrote bc it’s never anyone’s favorite fic when I ask, but I’m glad so many enjoyed it!

2. Sweet Enough To Eat (3.1k, andreil) 

Andrew experiencing cute aggression. That’s basically the whole premise lol.

 Anyway, this one is my oldest fic, so I assume that’s why it’s so popular. It’s cute, sweet even! I still like it to this day. Not much else to say about it though.

3. May We Meet Again (10.7k, andreil)

The first installment of the Artist Neil AU. 

To be honest, I don’t like it anymore. That whole AU has problems with pacing, and some characterization issues too. Plus, looking back at the art now makes me cringe so hard. The only reason it’s still up is bc I know a lot of people really like it. Sometimes I think about revising the whole thing but I still remember how big of an undertaking it was when I first wrote it and made all the art for it, so I probably won’t. 

4. The Marks We Make (41.3k, andreil)

A (mostly) canon rewrite from Andrew’s POV with a soulmate AU twist. 

This the first multichapter fic I ever wrote, and one of the earliest fics I ever published, so I’m not surprised it’s high on the list. There are some things I like about this one, and some I would do differently. Writing this fic helped me make some of my first friends in the fandom though, so it was very much worth it.

5. Yes Or No? (35.5k, andreil)

sub andrew & Dom Neil pwp - need I say more?. 

This one truly surprised me. It was meant to be a one-shot experiment, something I wrote as an exploration of my own boundaries and limits. BDSM fics are often triggering for me, so I generally avoid them, but I wanted to write a BDSM fic that I would be able to enjoy and to explore BDSM from a safe distance.

However, given how much the fandom seemed to be against Andrew submitting (and sometimes even just bottoming) at the time, I worried I might end up getting hate for writing it. To my surprise, I did not, and so many commenters asked that I continue it that I ended up turning it into a whole series. 

I’m quite proud of it still - it might just be a smut fic to most people, but it will always be more than just a smut fic to me. 

I do hate the last 3 paragraphs of the main fic though. I was on a kick where I thought incorporating references to fic titles and canon lines into my writing was clever and fun, but now I just cringe when I look at it. Ahh well, maybe someday I’ll change it and tell nobody. Create a little Berenstein/Berenstain Bears moment :)

Top 5 (Personal Ranking):

1.  More Than Words (32.9k, ongoing, neon friendship)

Neil and Aaron meet as kids and become best friends, long before Aaron learns his mother’s secret - he has a long lost twin brother.

I cannot gush enough about the love I have for this fic, this whole story. I can’t talk about it here because I have some insane twists planned (iykyk) but just know this fic is my baby and this story will be my magnum opus once it’s done. I love writing Neil and Aaron’s friendship, I love writing Aaron’s POV, I love the plans I have these boys. It’s still ongoing so I understand why it’s not higher up in the kudos ranking, but I’m hopeful that will change once I actually finish it.

2. A Quiet Self-Destruction (2.6k, andreil)

A character study on Andrew’s experience with depression, and how Neil helps him through his bad days.

I wrote this to comfort myself during one of my own depression spells. It still brings me a bit of hope on dark days. For that, I will always love it.

3. Scribbles and Sticky Notes (11.7k, andreil)

Neil retires from Exy, with heaps of fluff, soft Andreil, wholesome Twinyards, hurt/comfort, MCD and angst.

Hands down, this is the saddest fic I’ve ever written, and I’m quite proud of that fact. I think the pacing is really good, and the gut punches are quite successful (while being foreshadowed quite nicely). The characterization is also spot on, I think. It’s got MCD though, which I think is probably why it’s not more popular. 

4. The Past, Stained Red (4.4k, andreil)

Part 3 of the Artist Neil AU. Andrew has a surprise run-in with a ghost from his past, and finally gets some closure.

This is the only fic of the Artist Neil AU that I actually still like. It’s well-paced, well-characterized, and I still like the art. Mostly, though, I viciously loved writing Andrew getting to close the door on Cass, and I loved writing him acknowledging the harm she did to him as a foster parent. He couldn’t see it as a child, but as an adult? He sees her clearly, in all her failure. It was extremely cathartic to write that. 

5. Catdrew Meowyard (1.4k, andreil)

Andrew suddenly has cat ears and a tail. Nobody questions it. Shenanigans ensue.