PleasePassTheTabasco

I can't quite explain it, but Clue (1985), The Princess Bride (1987), Galaxy Quest (1999), and Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) are all the same genre

They aren't a spoof (roast) or a love letter (tribute), but a best man's speech; an expression of love with a gentle ribbing on ocassion.

I love how some fics are called shit like "They Only Shoot The Birds Who Cannot Sing" and it's like the most insane porn you're ever read and then some fics are called Spit On Me and it's 18,000 words of the most achingly id-scratching prose you've ever read and they're both. They're both so fucking good. thank God for fanfiction.

Geralt probably huffs and puffs about gossip and it being "trite shit beneath him" but I know that bitch turns into the biggest gossip whenever Jaskier has some new court drama to tell him after Winter. Fully locked the fuck in when Jaskier starts drawing diagrams and timelines into the dirt with a stick they both found just to get the full experience. They start mapping out entire family trees and realise the newest drama is connected to some shit that happened 30 years ago in the same court and they only know this because Geralt decided to be a nosy cunt about it when he last passed through there

Geralt's a fake ass homosexual if I had Joey Batey trailing after me for 20 years singing ballads about how amazing I was and tenderly stitching up my wounds after I got my ass kicked and gently washing my hair and was so devoted to me that everyone called him my bard I would've fucked him so hard that his vertebrae would be shooting out of his mouth like a pez dispenser but maybe that's just me.

Lyonel trying to make Dunk his forever girl while seething with jealous that Baelor died for him.