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ā
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@rustyadvice

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the music they put when she went into the room to see the capybarasvkjfvbggf
the only good thing about trump supporters is how easy it is to drag them with the simplest factĀ
Me, Catholic, walking into a Protestant church with no depictions of Mary: whereās my mom
Me, culturally Protestant, walking into a Catholic church filled balls to the walls with paintings sculptures candles and god knows what else: whyās there so much stuff
Me, Orthodox, walking into a western church:Ā Ā w h e r eĀ Ā a r eĀ Ā t h eĀ Ā b o n e s
Me, vampire, walking into any denominational holy place: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
man I couldn't do twitter. on tumblr nobody gives a shit if u bully celebrities, on twitter it becomes a fucking national conversation for three days
john green's cock monologue never could have happened on twitter
god I wish that were me: a compilation

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It checks out
early 00s media was the era of the boring girl protagonist and her heavily lesbian-coded bff
So, my iPod does this fucking genius factory thing where it forgets which artwork goes with which album and it makes guesses. Because itās pretty sure I wonāt notice.
Needless to say, I noticed.
the most 2014 post possible
the sad truth about oppa homeless style
and the unfathomable evil that is reddit
last year my followers and i began an investigation into the origin of oppa homeless style and we quickly discovered that there appears to only exists one single screenshot of the mythical tumblr post:
theĀ screenshot was posted to imgur on the 1st of march, 2014, and appeared on /r/thatHappened/ in a thread titled āFedoraād villain shames woman for giving to the homelessā
to further our investigation, @swordcats contacted the reddit user who had posted the thread. the user responded, saying they believe they āfound it on 4chanā, adding that it was āprobably fakeā
we still had hope that it could be a real tumblr post, but this confirmed our suspicion that it was possible the story was never posted to tumblr to begin with.Ā
we then tried everything we could think of to find any mention of oppa homeless style that predates the imgur upload, but nothing showed up
we even tried carbon dating the post by the shade of blue in the screenshot
this didnāt help us find oppa homeless style, but by comparing it to older posts we were at least able to determined that the screenshot could have been taken around the time of the imgur upload
an anon later messaged me and suggested we should take a look at the post history of reddit user MechaMew2
as the anon noted, they were a frequent contributor to /r/thatHappened/
here are some of the tumblr stories theyāve posted:
after posting 10 different MechaMew2 screenshots to my blog, i was contacted by fellow detectiveĀ @bluesidefanclub who had done their own investigation
and the findings were devastatingā¦
ALL of these screenshots are fake. all of the posts that arent a screenshotted reblog are his own posts, evidenced by the little xās on the bottom of some of the screenshots, which used to be tumblrs old delete button. i looked through his ENTIRE post history and every single one of them that isnt a screenshot of a reblog has the delete button on them. none of the posts that are screenshots of reblogs have the x on the bottom, though, so i tried searching for them. ive been on tumblr since 2011 and never saw any of them, even the ones that seemed viral. i searched key phrases from every single one and wasnt able to find any of the originals, and the only images of them that come up are the ones that were posted to imgur and reddit. this especially makes no sense for the āAAAA IT BURNS IT BURNSā post because (according to the screenshot) it had at least 83k notes at the time of screenshotting. so he probably just edited those with inspect element.
MechaMew2 has also been a frequent submitter to r/fatlogic were they post similarly ridiculous stories intended to make fat people look bad:
Tumblrina gets triggered by nephew; Hides his homework under the couch so it canāt hurt her anymore (3rd of october, 2014)
Fat-shaming Barbie gets told off at the gymĀ (31st of october, 2014)
nowadays MechaMew2 is mostly fabricating fake facebook stories about pitbulls (theyāre a frequent poster to r/banpitbulls)
Diapered pit bull named Naruto escapes through a window. Catch him and win dinner at Chiliās. (3rd of november, 2020)
Family cancels their Christmas; Sends the money to Trump (30th of november, 2020)
of all the tumblr screenshots, @bluesidefanclubā was only able to find one real post (which still showed the url of the person who reblogged it)
in a last ditch effort @bluesidefanclub: Ā
searched for oppa homeless style on google, every major image hosting site (photobucket, flickr, imgur, etc) and also did reverse image lookup on about ten different sites, and each came back with the imgur result from march 2014 being the earliest upload. i searched every visible tag on the post up to the end and found nothing, and searched twitter for āoppa homeless styleā pre-dating the imgur upload and couldnāt find anything explicitly pointing to the tumblr post.
so yes⦠ i think we must finally accept that oppa homeless style was never a real tumblr post
oppa homeless style was made by a redditor whose passion in life is to make fake screenshots of fake tumblr stories for fake internet points
as connoisseur of fake tumblr story i expected to be devastated by this news, but really it has only made oppa homeless style even funnier

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i literally cannot drink milk normally i gotta chug
YA books: There are 2 boys, the protagonist girl HAS to date one, but how can she choose? They are so incredibly different in every way!
The boys:
He literally has a twin brother but the implication here is much funnier
what is it about whales that makes humans so full of melancholic longing
eats and vibes, surrounded by friends,Ā fat as shit. absolute luxury. goals. fucking ideal.
man I couldn't do twitter. on tumblr nobody gives a shit if u bully celebrities, on twitter it becomes a fucking national conversation for three days
john green's cock monologue never could have happened on twitter
god I wish that were me: a compilation

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
bored. might swollow a kinder egg like a snake just because
This is what the FDA thought everyone would do if they allowed kinder eggs in America
People who donāt want to read The Martian in case the science is too complicated should be informed that it contains the linesĀ āThe best way to store the ingredients of water is to make them be waterā,Ā āIt is of course dangerous to set off an explosive device on a spacecraftā, andĀ āIf I cut a hole in the wall of the hab, the air wonāt stay inside any moreā.
I love this fucking book
āIāve said the words kilowatt-hours-per-sol so many times theyāve lost all meaning so Iām going to call them pirate-ninjas.
āSo I need to generate nine hundred pirate-ninjasā¦ā
thereās an entire chapter dedicated to him wondering how the cubs are doing while heās stuck on mars, dying
I like the part where the guys on Earth are likeĀ āHe thinks we all gave up on him, and that heās completely alone. I wonder what heās thinking about right now.ā And heās likeĀ āHow come Aquaman can control whales?ā
ā As with most of lifeās problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation. ā
āActually, I was the very lowest ranked member of the crew. I would only be āin commandā if I were the only remaining person.ā
Two pages later⦠āWhat do you know? Iām in commandā
āMe: āThis is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and check the internal tubing?ā NASA: (after five hours of deliberation) āNo. Youāll fuck it up and die.ā So I took it apart.
And my personal favorite :ā Also, I have duct tape. Ordinary duct tape, like you buy at a hardware store. Turns out even NASA canāt improve on duct tape. Yes, of course duct tape works in a near-vacuum. Duct tape works anywhere. Duct tape is magic and should be worshiped.ā
the fact none of these posts have even MENTIONED potatoes is a crime
Thatās a good point, about 50% of this book is about potato farming.