i have yet to bloom a thousand more times

Friday was a nightmare. I finally settled on a dress for a wedding next week that I felt good in, but then my sister and a coworker told me the light blue might be too light for a wedding (even though it had dark blue flowers all over it, and it was a slightly fancier summer dress). I literally spent 4 hours driving around looking for either a new dress or a cardigan to highlight the blue and it was terrible!!! how are the 2000s and 2014 back in the worst way? any store that catered to teens had all the clothes that made me feel terrible WHEN I was in a teen, which I guess makes sense since being dangerously thin is trending again. I had a really surreal moment when I was in h&m (desperately trying to find a cardigan) and broken strings by james morrison and nelly furtado came on. like talk about a 2000s deep cut.

(also when did cardigans disappear? I went into old navy and couldn't find a single one. insane.)

my bf ended up texting his friend that's getting married and they said the dress is fine 😭 which is so silly that he had to message them, but I was so stressed.

and I think all that shopping and stress flared whatever is going on with my stomach because holy fuck I feel so bad today. just so nauseous, and anytime I eat I have to go to the bathroom :( which was already sort of happening but I just feel worse overall today. I really didn't want to make a doctor's appointment about this because last time I brought up different stomach issues, all the tests just led to an ibs diagnosis lol but the symptoms are different this time (sorry to be tmi but I've had constipation issues for years and this is the complete opposite). trying to google what to do is so overwhelming and tbh idk if I can handle weeks of trying the low fodmap diet with no guarantee it'll work. I'm already at the point where I'm losing my appetite (hopefully that part is just a flare and it will pass) and I just can't stand the nausea.