What?

air mattresses love nothing more than to slowly deflate overnight it's their favorite hobby

I have come up with a better metaphor than “you can’t pour from an empty cup” for burnout. You can’t boil an empty kettle. Pouring from an empty cup just gets you nowhere. Trying to boil an empty kettle can ruin the kettle, the stove, and burn down your house if you keep trying it.

don't listen to them babe just keep opening more tabs in your browser

I was talking about Goosebumps with a friend tonight and found the greatest tagline for any work of horror ever

"Not beating the ___ allegations" is such a 'now' turn of phrase, implying as it does a world where everyone's behavior is always on literal trial by a guilt-presuming judge and jury that consists of anyone who happens to be paying attention.

Not beating the panopticon allegations

anytime a woman starts talking about the "bonds of sisterhood that inherently exist between all women" you just know they bullied the weird girls in high school

sorry we mistook your boyfriend for a cinnamon roll and we sold him with the chametz. yeah it's just a temporary agreement, you can have him back in eight days. he'll be okay he's safe in a locked cabinet with the pasta

star trek heritage post 🌿 (January 27th, 2022)