where love starts to decay

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

the bass was loud enough that you felt it before the door even opened, low violent vibrations bleeding through the warped wood beneath your knuckles while somewhere inside the apartment somebody shouted over the music loud enough to earn a burst of drunken laughter immediately afterward. the hallway outside smelled faintly damp from earlier rainfall still clinging to people’s skin, though most of it disappeared the second sungchan finally pulled the door open and the heat from inside spilled outward into the corridor.

it hit your skin instantly.

thick overheated air dense with vodka fumes and sweat and whatever aggressively masculine cologne one of his friends had clearly drowned himself in, all of it tangled together beneath the stale lived-in smell the apartment permanently carried now from boys sharing one space for too long. 

instant noodles, protein powder, and cheap alcohol.

sungchan filled the doorway almost completely when he opened it, one hand still loose around the handle while the other pushed absently back through his dishevelled hair, dark strands sticking faintly against his forehead beneath the hallway light. the sleeves of his top sat shoved messily up his forearms and there was already a faint flush spread across his cheeks that suggested he’d been drinking long before you got there, though the second his eyes landed properly on you something in his expression shifted immediately anyway.

softened. brightened. like seeing you standing there had pulled his attention fully back into focus after hours spent drifting lazily through noise and alcohol.

“you made it,” he said, and even over the music there was something stupidly genuine about the relief sitting beneath the words.

his gaze moved quickly over you after that, not subtle enough to miss. the short skirt, your bare legs disappearing into boots still damp from outside, the tiny black top clinging tightly enough to your body that the silver glint of your belly piercing caught briefly beneath the flickering hallway light. you watched his throat move once before his attention snapped upward again almost immediately, the corner of his mouth pulling higher like he’d just remembered he was supposed to pretend not to stare.

“what?” you asked lightly, though your mouth had already started curving before he could answer.

“nothing,” he said too quickly, smiling wider now. “you just look—”

“you look good,” he says, voice low and scraped raw, like the words had to fight their way out. 

he swallows thickly, the pause stretching long and dangerous between you, his eyes flickering dark with thoughts that are anything but pg. the air between you already feels heavier, charged, like one move could make it spark.

“good enough to rip my clothes off?”

the words came easily, shamelessly, and the effect was immediate. sungchan’s expression faltered for half a second before a breathy laugh escaped him, his eyes dropping briefly toward the floor like he needed the second to pull himself back together.

“maybe,” he muttered eventually, though the answer sat too low and too honest beneath the music to sound convincing as a joke.

another burst of shouting erupted somewhere deeper inside the apartment immediately afterward, followed by loud drunken laughter from the kitchen, but sungchan barely seemed to register any of it anymore. his attention stayed fixed on you instead while his hand settled automatically against your waist to pull you inside, palm broad and hot, fingers spreading wide over the strip of bare skin above your skirt. the touch is deliberate, thumb brushing once, twice, slow and firm enough that heat blooms low in your belly and spreads outward in a rush. 

even after the door clicks shut behind you, he doesn’t let go. his fingers stay pressed there, warm and slightly calloused, the faint tremor in them telling you exactly how hard he’s working to stay in control. you feel the heat of his body radiating against yours, the clean scent of his cologne mixed with whiskey and something darker, something that makes your mouth water.

inside, the light slides over you again and his eyes follow it greedily, slower this time, drinking you in like he’s starving. his fingers flex once against your waist, pressing harder, almost a warning, then he leans down. the kiss he aims for your cheek lands dangerously close to the corner of your mouth instead, warm, the faint burn of whiskey on his lips and the scrape of stubble against your skin sending a sharp shiver racing down your spine. 

when he pulls back he doesn’t go far. his face hovers inches from yours, breath hot and ragged against your lips, eyes half-lidded and dark with want. you can feel the tension vibrating off him, every tight muscle coiled like a spring, the way his chest rises and falls too fast, the faint dampness of his palm where it grips you tighter.

his name cracks through the haze, loud and sharp, yelled from one of his friends in the kitchen. the voice cuts straight through the thick air like a blade, followed immediately by another burst of rowdy, drunken laughter that echoes down the hallway. sungchan’s whole body jolts just slightly, the spell fracturing. he rolls his eyes toward the ceiling, slow and annoyed, the movement pulling the strong line of his throat into sharp relief under the dim light. for a second the frustration is plain on his face, jaw tight, like the interruption physically pains him.

his hand never properly leaves your waist as he guides you further into the apartment, palm resting low against your side while he steers you through the crowded hallway with absent familiarity. the music grows louder the deeper you move inside, bass shaking low through the floor hard enough that you can feel it vibrating faintly up through the heels of your boots, while voices overlap messily from every direction at once until individual conversations become impossible to separate from the noise.

people notice sungchan bringing you in almost immediately.

not in a dramatic way, nothing in the room pauses long enough for that. but heads turn briefly as you pass through the apartment anyway, quick half-drunk acknowledgements thrown in your direction between conversations while bodies shift lazily aside to let both of you through.

“finally,” one of his friends' mutters from the couch, slouched so far back they’re practically horizontal against the cushions already. “he’s been checking his phone every five seconds.”

“shut the fuck up,” sungchan shoots back automatically, though the grin tugging briefly at the corner of his mouth ruins any actual irritation behind it.

the kitchen comes into view a second later, brighter than the rest of the apartment beneath harsh overhead lighting that exposes every smear of spilled alcohol and hands pressed into the countertops. bottles crowd almost every available surface, some half empty already, others tipped sideways beside bowls of crisps and sweets. somebody has abandoned a hoodie over one of the barstools while another person leans heavily against the fridge laughing hard enough that their entire body folds forward with it.

sungchan finally lets go of your waist only long enough to make space for you between the counter and himself, guiding you naturally toward the empty stretch of marble like he’s done it enough times before not to think about it anymore. his hand brushes lightly against your thigh as you hop up onto the counter, skirt dragging higher from the movement while the cold surface presses briefly against the backs of your legs before the apartment heat swallows the sensation almost immediately again.

sungchan moved around in the narrow space between your knees and the counter, half distracted now by the growing list of demands being thrown at him from different corners of the apartment. somebody wanted more ice, somebody else was already complaining the drinks were too weak. another voice cut through the music asking where the vodka disappeared to, followed immediately by a chorus of drunken disagreement from somewhere near the living room.

he laughed under his breath at all of it, one hand braced briefly against the counter beside your thigh while the other reached past you for another bottle, the movement forcing him close enough that the warmth coming off him pressed directly into your skin. every few seconds his attention drifted back toward you automatically anyway, like his focus kept snagging there no matter how many conversations pulled at him from the rest of the room.

the pitcher sitting on the counter beside you filled slowly while he worked, liquor splashing softly against ice beneath the music while he reached for bottles and mixers without really looking anymore, moving with the loose familiarity of somebody who’d hosted enough nights like this before. the kitchen crowded tighter around both of you with every passing minute, shoulders brushing together, people squeezing through narrow gaps behind sungchan while the apartment heat thickened steadily beneath the lights.

at some point his hand disappeared absently into the open bowl sitting beside you, fingers brushing through sweets and chocolate bars before he pulled out a lollipop between two fingers.

“strawberry’s your favourite, right?”

you nodded once.

the wrapper crinkled softly between his fingers while he unwrapped it one-handed, and when he looked back toward you again his gaze dropped automatically to your mouth first before lifting upward. something shifted briefly across his expression at the sight of the gloss still shining there beneath the kitchen light, subtle enough that you almost missed it entirely.

his hand settled beneath your chin a second later, fingers warm against your skin while he tilted your face upward slightly to push the lollipop into your mouth for you. the candy pressed sweet and artificial against your tongue immediately, and sungchan’s eyes stayed there a fraction too long when your lips closed slowly around it.

his thumb lingered briefly beneath your jaw after the lollipop disappeared between your lips, the pad of it dragging once lightly against your skin before he finally pulled his hand away again, though his gaze still hadn’t properly left your mouth yet. the music swallowed most of the room whole around you both but sungchan looked momentarily detached from all of it standing there between your knees, attention narrowing into something quieter and warmer beneath the noise.

you sucked lightly against the candy without breaking eye contact and the reaction was immediate as his throat moved once.

a quiet curse slipped from somebody behind sungchan drags his attention away from your mouth long enough for him to glance sideways again, though the faint flush spread across his cheeks had deepened noticeably beneath the kitchen lights now. 

“bro,” another voice cut through the kitchen over the music, lower and rougher around the edges from alcohol, “i think we need more paper cup—”

the words stopped halfway, sohee just pushing his way properly into the kitchen crowd when he noticed you sitting there.

his body stalled for a fraction too long near the counter, eyes lifting automatically toward sungchan first before landing on you between the harsh overhead lights and the cluttered kitchen mess around you both. messy brown hair hung loose across his forehead, slightly damp and curling faintly at the ends from the apartment heat, while the thin silver chains resting against his throat caught briefly beneath the light whenever he moved. his shirt looked wrinkled already, stretched slightly at the collar over the darker long sleeve underneath, sleeves pushed carelessly up his forearms like he’d stopped caring hours ago about fixing them properly.

for a second he said nothing at all.

his gaze moved once over the scene in front of him, sungchan standing between your legs, your skirt riding dangerously high against the counter edge before something shifted subtly across his face, tightening hard enough around the mouth and jaw to sharpen his entire expression almost instantly.

somebody squeezed loudly past him toward the fridge, shoulder knocking against his arm hard enough to jostle him slightly, but sohee barely reacted. his eyes remained fixed on the two of you another second longer while his tongue pressed once against the inside of his cheek like he was forcing something back down.

sungchan looked up first, oblivious to most of it.

“we’re out already?” sungchan asked with a laugh.

sohee’s attention finally dragged away from you then.

“yeah,” he muttered, voice flatter now than it had been when he first walked in, the words clipped short enough that even sungchan glanced at him for half a second afterward. 

whatever mood he’d been in before entering the kitchen seemed to have vanished entirely beneath the weight of seeing you there, replaced instead by something visibly restrained sitting tight across his face while he grabbed one of the abandoned cups near the sink and brought it up to his face to demonstrate.

“our friends drink like fucking alcoholics.”

sungchan laughed as he finally moved away from the space between your knees a second later, the sudden absence of him leaving the cold edge of the counter more noticeable against the backs of your thighs, legs dangling loosely over the side now while noise and movement swelled around the kitchen again to fill the gap he’d left behind.

across from you, sohee still hadn’t looked your way again.

his back was half turned while he leaned one shoulder against the counter near the stove, cup hanging loose from one hand while another guy beside him spoke animatedly about something neither of you cared enough to listen to. even from where you sat you could still see the tension sitting visibly through the line of his shoulders though, jaw set hard enough beneath the kitchen lights that the muscle there shifted every few seconds like he was grinding his teeth without realising it.

it irritated you instantly, because the sheer hostility of it had started feeling excessive at this point. every interaction with sohee carried this same unpleasant edge now, this constant sense that merely existing in the same room as you immediately worsened his mood, his responses flattening into clipped little remarks before he inevitably found some excuse to occupy himself elsewhere. the longer it dragged on the more it started getting beneath your skin too.

sungchan returned a few minutes later balancing a stack of paper cups against his chest alongside a tray of brownies somebody had apparently shoved into his hands halfway back to the counter. he dropped the cups beside the bottles before setting the tray down near you, the smell of burnt chocolate drifting upward almost immediately beneath the heat hanging thick through the kitchen.

“hungry?” sungchan asked distractedly. “we have brownies.”

your eyes drifted lazily toward the tray. one side had escaped mostly intact, but the other had darkened several shades too far, the edges bordering on charcoal while the centre remained suspiciously uneven.

“those burnt looking things are brownies?”

sungchan glanced down at the tray before laughing quietly beneath his breath.

“hey, those are the ones sohee made,” he said, already sounding halfway defensive before you’d even answered. “they’re actually good.”

you pressed your tongue slowly against the candy in your mouth before looking back toward the brownies again, unconvinced.

“i'm not putting that in my mouth.”

“you're being dramatic.”

“i'm being sensible. attempting to swallow one of those things feels like a disaster waiting to happen.”

sungchan let out a quiet breath that sounded suspiciously like the beginning of a laugh before he managed to stop it, his mouth twitching once as though he had suddenly remembered whose brownies were being discussed.

unfortunately, sohee had heard it too.

you could tell from the way his attention shifted briefly in your direction before settling elsewhere again, the reaction small enough that most people probably wouldn't have noticed it. he didn't say anything immediately. instead he reached for the vodka bottle sitting beside the sink, unscrewing the cap with slightly more force than seemed strictly necessary before pouring himself a drink. the glass knocked softly against the countertop when he set the bottle down again, his focus remaining fixed stubbornly on the task in front of him despite the fact the conversation had very clearly stopped being about brownies several seconds ago.

“crazy,” he said eventually, voice low enough that it almost disappeared beneath the bass rattling through the apartment.

his eyes lifted toward you then for the first time since entering the kitchen properly, the look in them flat and steady enough that irritation prickled immediately beneath your skin before he even finished speaking.

“i didn't realise you'd become so selective about what you chose to swallow now.”

the comment settled neatly into the space between all three of you, ugly in the way it took a moment to register properly, slipping into the conversation with the same ease as everything else that had been said that evening despite the fact it landed infinitely harder. you sungchan freezing almost immediately, small enough that nobody else would, but close enough that you felt it anyway. the way his body stalled halfway through reaching for one of the cups, the easy looseness that had been sitting across his face all night disappearing so quickly it almost felt wiped clean. even his smile dropped slightly at the corners before he looked down toward the counter instead, exhaling slowly through his nose while his fingers tightened once around the stack of cups hard enough to bend the top one inward.

“sohee,” he muttered quietly, exhaustion settling heavily beneath the warning now like this was an argument he already knew too well.

irritation flared almost immediately after the words left his mouth, sharp enough that you found yourself pulling the lollipop slowly from between your lips before you even realised you'd stopped sucking on it. the entire kitchen seemed to shift around the feeling, overcrowded, every passing shoulder an inconvenience, every burst of laughter unnecessarily loud. even the music vibrating through the apartment walls had started to feel less like background noise and more like something pressing insistently against your skull. across from you, sohee still looked infuriatingly composed despite the tension sitting visibly through every line of his body.

except he wasn’t composed at all.

you could see it now the longer you looked at him. there was a strange inconsistency to him, tiny fractures appearing beneath the surface the harder he tried to maintain it. subtle enough that nobody else in the room would have noticed but impossible to miss once your attention settled properly on him. the composure was still there, at least outwardly, but it no longer felt effortless. there was a faint rigidity to him now, an unusual awareness in the way he held himself, as though every instinct urging him to look away was being actively overruled by something stronger.

the cool indifference he wore so comfortably around everyone else had begun slipping in place, yet he kept looking at you.

being looked at by sohee always carried this unpleasant feeling you couldn’t fully explain because there was never anything impulsive or openly emotional about it. nothing softened in his face when his eyes moved over you. no awkwardness, no embarrassment, no recklessness that could be dismissed as drunkenness. if anything, the restraint made it worse because every glance felt too deliberate, dragged slowly over you with the same visible displeasure. 

your fingers curled tighter into your palm before you finally snapped.

“grow the fuck up, sohee.”

sohee lifted a cup toward his mouth instead, taking a slow swallow while his gaze stayed fixed steadily on you.

“i think,” he said eventually, voice flat enough to disappear almost completely beneath the bass, “you’ll find the one who needs some growing to do is you.”

beside you, sungchan sighed quietly through his nose, the sound almost disappearing beneath the noise filling the apartment, though you still caught it. when you glanced toward him briefly his hand was rubbing slowly at the back of his neck now, shoulders noticeably tighter than before while his gaze stayed fixed somewhere near the counter instead of either of you.

you laughed softly under your breath, the sound mean enough around the edges that sungchan’s shoulders visibly tightened beside you, clearly not a joyful sound.

“god,” you muttered, shaking your head once. “you’re such a fucking asshole.”

sohee’s mouth twitched faintly at that, though it looked closer to contempt than amusement.

“am i wrong though?”

he sounded calm saying it, certain which somehow irritated you more than if he’d shouted.

“sohee. please,” sungchan cut in quickly this time, voice lower now as his eyes flicked briefly between both of you. 

“can we not do this tonight?”

sohee said nothing else, standing there across from you with his eyes fixed steadily on your face, expression pulled tight enough now that it looked almost painful. you could practically see the argument still sitting there behind his teeth, something harsher clearly threatening to surface every time his jaw shifted faintly beneath the tension holding it shut. even the silence coming from him felt hostile somehow and every second he stood there saying nothing seemed only to make whatever was lodged beneath your ribs spread further, sinking its hooks deeper instead of loosening them.

then eventually his eyes rolled once before he took a slow breath through his nose, the kind people took when they were forcing themselves not to say something they’d regret afterward.

“whatever.”

the word came flat and clipped beneath the music before he stepped away from the counter entirely, disappearing back toward the living room crowd without another glance in your direction.

you watched him walk away, expecting some of the unpleasant energy between you to disappear with him, only to find it clinging stubbornly behind. it sat low and heavy inside your chest now, impossible to ignore, colouring everything around it. by the time he disappeared fully into the crowd you were still looking in the direction he'd gone, annoyed by him, by yourself for still thinking about him, and most of all by the fact he'd somehow managed to get the last word without saying another thing.

“he’s actually insufferable,” you muttered under your breath.

it was only then that sungchan seemed to relax beside you, something easing in him almost immediately after sohee disappeared into the crowd. the slight distraction that had lingered beneath his expression throughout the exchange finally disappeared, his focus settling properly again now that he no longer seemed caught between two opposing directions. a quiet breath left him before he stepped back into the space between your knees, one hand finding your thigh automatically while the other reached for the abandoned drink sitting beside you.

“why do you guys have to argue every two seconds?” he asked eventually, though the question sounded tired enough that it was obvious he already knew the answer somewhere beneath it and simply didn’t want to touch it directly.

you let your arms slide loosely around his shoulders, drawing him closer without really thinking about it, his familiar warmth replacing some of the agitation still buzzing unpleasantly beneath your skin. for a moment you only looked at him, taking in the faint crease still lingering between his brows, the way he seemed to be waiting for an answer he already suspected he wasn't going to get.

“i don’t know,” you mumbled lazily. “ask your guard dog.”

sungchan snorted softly beneath his breath at that, though it lacked some of the easy warmth from earlier. instead his forehead dropped briefly against your shoulder, eyes falling shut briefly as though he was allowing himself a second to decompress now. his hand remained resting against your thigh, thumb moving once in a slow absent sweep before going still again.

he stayed quiet after that, his grip resting loose against your thigh while the kitchen carried on around both of you in blurred fragments of movement and colour, conversation and music blurring together into little more than background noise. he seemed content to remain exactly where he was, leaning comfortably into the space between your knees while your fingers drifted idly through the hair at the back of his neck. after a while the exchange stopped feeling like something actively unfolding and became just another passing moment absorbed into the noise of the evening, buried beneath laughter, half-finished conversations and the restless movement of people weaving through the apartment.

and yet some unpleasant remnant of the exchange still lingered stubbornly beneath your skin, refusing to settle no matter how thoroughly you tried to ignore it.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

sunlight filtered weakly through the gap in sungchan’s blinds in thin pale strips, cutting across the room in uneven bands that exposed the aftermath of last night piece by piece. clothes abandoned carelessly across the floor, one of your boots tipped onto its side near the desk, half-empty bottles crowding the nightstand beside tangled charging cables and somebody’s forgotten wallet. the air still carried the stale heaviness of alcohol soaked too deeply into fabric to disappear overnight, tangled together with the lingering warmth of sweat, detergent, and the faint musky trace of sex that clung stubbornly to the sheets beneath you.

you felt sungchan before your eyes fully opened, the weight of his body pressed heavily against your back, one arm locked tight around your waist even in sleep while one of his thighs remained hooked between yours. your body protested immediately the second consciousness returned fully, soreness blooming slow and deep in your muscles, not sharp enough to hurt but lingering everywhere in that heavy satisfying way that only came after being fucked properly.

your eyes narrowed against the stripe of sunlight falling directly across your face while somewhere beyond the bedroom walls the apartment hummed faintly with morning noise, pipes groaning softly and the low distant buzz of a refrigerator motor struggling through the silence. sungchan stirred slightly behind you when you shifted again, his grip tightening automatically on instinct before his face buried deeper into the back of your shoulder, still half asleep.

your own skin felt warm beneath the oversized shirt you’d stolen from him sometime during the night, fabric hanging loose over the bruises blooming darker now along your collarbone and thighs. even swallowing felt dry from the alcohol still lingering in your system, tongue heavy against the roof of your mouth while you stared blearily toward the ceiling another moment, letting the ache between your legs settle deeper before finally trying to pull yourself free from sungchan’s grip.

he made a low sound immediately, somewhere between a groan and complaint, eyebrows tightening without fully waking while his hand slid slowly across your waist like he was trying to keep you there even unconscious.

“where are you going,” he mumbled thickly, voice roughened by sleep, barely understandable against your shoulder.

“kitchen,” you muttered back automatically, already prying his arm loose despite the way he resisted weakly.

sungchan only sighed softly through his nose before finally letting go enough for you to slip out from beneath him, though even then his fingertips dragged lazily across your waist at the last second like his body disliked the distance instinctively. behind you the mattress dipped again when he rolled onto his back, one arm falling across his face while the sheets slipped low enough to expose the fresh red scratches streaking across his chest and shoulder from the night before.

you barely spared the sight more than a passing glance before padding toward the bedroom door barefoot, the cold wood floor biting against the lingering warmth still trapped inside your skin.

the apartment looked worse in daylight.

last night the darkness and coloured lights had hidden most of it beneath shadow and movement, but now everything sat exposed beneath the weak morning sun. sticky rings staining the coffee table where drinks had been abandoned hours ago, empty bottles lined crookedly along the kitchen counters and the general debris left behind by too many people staying up far later than they should have.

the kitchen tiles felt even colder beneath your feet when you stepped inside, the chill climbing briefly up your legs while the refrigerator hummed even louder in the silence. the fridge light spilled pale and artificial across your face the second you pulled the door open, cold air brushing across your skin while you stared blankly inside for a moment trying to decide what you actually wanted. there wasn’t much besides energy drinks, leftover takeaway containers, beer, and half-finished cartons shoved carelessly onto shelves between sauces and protein shakes.

eventually you reached for the carton of orange juice sitting near the front anyway before taking a slow drink straight from it without bothering to grab a glass first, the cold sweetness hitting your tongue sharply enough to make your face tighten slightly.

you hummed absently under your breath without really realising it while setting the juice down against the counter, fingers drifting lazily toward the fruit bowl sitting near the stove before grabbing a strawberry from where it had been abandoned among packets of crisps.

the familiarity of the apartment settled strangely easily around you.

you knew where everything was without thinking. which cabinets stuck when you pulled them too hard. where sungchan kept clean glasses because his friends never put them back properly. which side of the sink leaked if the tap twisted too far left. your body moved through the kitchen automatically, like it had done it enough times before to stop feeling unfamiliar entirely, and there was something almost invasive about how naturally you occupied the space this early in the morning while the apartment still looked half-undressed from the night before.

still chewing slowly on the strawberry, you stretched up onto your tiptoes to reach one of the higher cabinets, fingers brushing uselessly against the edge before finally nudging it open with a soft curse beneath your breath. one hand braced lazily against the counter to steady yourself as you searched blindly for the nutella jar shoved somewhere near the back shelf.

behind you came the slow shuffle of footsteps dragging across the floorboard which you barely thought about at first, presuming it was sungchan. your head turned eventually anyway, expecting to see him stumbling sleepily into the kitchen after you, still half buried in exhaustion from the night before, but the motion stalled halfway through when your eyes landed on sohee standing near the entrance instead.

his hair hung messily across his forehead in uneven dark strands, flattened strangely on one side from sleep while the rest stuck out in different directions like he hadn’t bothered trying to fix it yet. one eye remained barely open while he rubbed tiredly at it with the side of his index finger, shoulders rising and falling slowly beneath the lingering heaviness of sleep and alcohol both. he was shirtless too, grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips while the thin silver chain resting against his chest shifted faintly when he exhaled through his nose.

his gaze stayed lowered at first while he moved further into the kitchen still rubbing distractedly at his eye, clearly making his way toward the cabinets beside the sink without really thinking, but the second he finally looked up the movement stalled halfway through. his hand dropped slowly from his face while something in his expression hardened almost on instinct, shoulders pulling tighter beneath the lingering heaviness of sleep as his eyes moved over you once in silence, dragging briefly across the oversized shirt hanging loose against your body, the bruises exposed beneath the hem where your legs were still bare, the darker marks scattered visibly along your neck now that daylight exposed everything last night had blurred softer at the edges.

you watched his jaw tighten hard enough for the muscle there to flick once beneath his skin before his gaze shifted away again toward the counter instead, though whatever exhaustion had still been softening his face moments earlier seemed to disappear almost immediately afterward, replaced by that same familiar tension that always surfaced around you now, restrained but impossible to miss once you knew what to look for.

the silence stretched long enough afterward to become noticeable. you watched him open the cabinet beside the sink harder than necessary, the wood cracking sharply against the frame before settling again, and the sound seemed to linger awkwardly afterward in the already overheated kitchen.

he crossed toward the sink with that same rigid restraint threaded through every movement, like walking into the kitchen and finding you there first thing in the morning had immediately forced something sour beneath his skin that he was trying very hard not to let spill over. the tap screeched faintly when he twisted it on too hard, water crashing sharply into the glass while you stayed where you were beside the counter spreading nutella across bread in slow distracted motions, pretending not to notice the way the atmosphere in the room had shifted completely around him. five minutes ago the apartment had felt sluggish and half asleep, heavy with leftover alcohol and silence, but now the kitchen carried that same ugly tension that always seemed to bloom the second the two of you occupied the same space too long.

you could feel him behind you without looking properly. the weight of his silence settled strangely against your spine while the knife dragged another dark stripe of chocolate across the bread in your hands, your movements slowing slightly the longer he stood there refusing to speak. water dripped steadily from the bottom of his glass onto the counter after he finally lifted it to his mouth, the sound irregular and irritatingly loud against the quiet while he swallowed once, twice, lingering there beside the sink long after somebody else would have either said good morning or left the room entirely.

instead, his voice finally cut through the kitchen low and roughened by sleep.

“so is this the new thing now?”

the question landed wrong immediately. not because of the words themselves, but because of everything sitting underneath them, the irritation threaded tightly through his tone, the accusation buried beneath something that sounding dangerously close to disgust. your hand paused briefly against the bread before continuing again anyway, slower now, deliberate, not giving him an answer.

“you two are back together?” he pushed on after a while, clear that you weren't so enthusiastic to reply.

you glanced over your shoulder at him then.

he was leaning back against the sink now with one hand braced against the marble beside him. there was something rougher about him this morning than there had been the night before, the careful composure he usually carried around seeming slightly out of place against sleep-flushed skin and the faint shadow darkening beneath his eyes. under different circumstances it might even have made him look younger.

instead, it only made the look he gave you feel more honest.

“like it’s any of your business,” you answered flatly.

for a second neither of you moved. then sohee laughed quietly under his breath. the sound wasn’t amusement, it was sharper than that, bitter around the edges in a way that instantly made your shoulders tense.

“right,” he muttered, pushing himself upright again before reaching for the glass again.

“because you hanging around my kitchen every other morning wearing his clothes and helping yourself to my food apparently has nothing to do with me.”

your grip tightened around the knife automatically at the use of his words. irritation climbed hot through your chest at the sight of him standing there acting like your mere existence inside the apartment was something contaminating, like you touching the counters or opening the fridge somehow personally offended him.

you turned fully toward him then, bread still in one hand while the knife rested carelessly against your fingers.

“whatever,” you said sharply. “do you have a problem with it or something?”

sohee’s eyes settled on you properly for the first time since entering the kitchen, the question lingering between you for a moment.

you had expected the answer immediately. a sarcastic remark, an insult or some variation of the same dismissive attitude he’d been throwing at you all morning.

instead, he stayed silent.

it wasn’t a long silence, barely a couple of seconds at most, but it felt strangely significant coming from somebody who normally seemed to have an opinion ready the second your name entered a conversation. his attention remained fixed on you while the pause stretched just enough to make the absence of an answer feel like one in itself.

which, unfortunately for him, told you everything you needed to know.

“we both know i do.”

the words settled into the kitchen heavily enough that the silence afterward felt almost suffocating.

you became suddenly aware of everything at once, the sticky counter pressing faintly beneath your fingertips, the hum of the refrigerator vibrating softly through the room, water still dripping from the tap beside sohee in slow uneven intervals that sounded unnaturally loud now.

sohee stayed standing there with the empty glass hanging loose in his hand and there was something uniquely unpleasant about the composure of it all. the comment had been cruel enough on its own, but what lingered afterward felt worse somehow, because nothing about him suggested he'd spoken impulsively or regretted it the second it left his mouth. he looked exactly the same as he had before, standing there with that same unwavering certainty settled across his face, as though his dislike of you was not something he wrestled with but simply a conclusion he'd reached a long time ago and no longer felt any need to hide.

you opened your mouth to answer him, the words already sitting there ready to leave, but somewhere down the hallway came the heavy sound of footsteps dragging unevenly across the floorboards followed by the low rough scrape of a yawn, and a second later sungchan appeared in the kitchen doorway still half asleep.

he looked completely wrecked by sleep in the most predictable way possible, hair flattened messily against one side of his head, eyes narrowed against the brightness while he rubbed distractedly at his face with the heel of his palm before letting his arm fall again. he hadn’t bothered pulling a shirt on either before following you out of the bedroom, only a pair of dark sweatpants hanging low on his hips, and the second he stepped properly into the kitchen the marks left behind from the night before became impossible to miss. red scratches dragged unevenly across the broad slope of his chest and shoulder, darker bruises scattered beneath his collarbone and throat where your mouth had lingered too long hours earlier, all of it exposed carelessly beneath the harsh honesty of daylight.

his gaze found you immediately.

whatever lingering tension had settled through the kitchen seconds earlier seemed completely lost on him still, buried beneath sleep and whatever soft haze remained from waking up warm beside somebody. he crossed toward you without hesitation, movements slow and heavy with exhaustion while another yawn caught him halfway across the room.

“why’d you leave,” he mumbled, voice roughened by sleep.

before you could answer properly his arms slid automatically around your waist from behind, chest pressing warm against your back while he folded himself into your space like it was instinctive by now. the weight of him settled heavily against your shoulders while his face disappeared into the crook of your neck, breath warm against your skin before he pressed two absentminded kisses there, lazy enough to feel unconscious.

you barely reacted beyond shifting slightly against him to keep spreading chocolate across the toast balanced in your hand. the knife scraped softly over bread while sungchan stayed draped over your back, eyes probably half closed again by now judging from the way his body seemed to melt heavier against yours with every passing second. your fingers lifted automatically anyway, brushing once through the messy hair at the nape of his neck out of habit while you took a bite from the corner of the toast.

“couldn’t sleep with you crushing my organs,” you muttered around the mouthful.

sungchan laughed quietly against your neck, the sound low and tired while his mouth brushed carelessly over one of the darker marks there again.

“you're so dramatic.”

across the kitchen sohee hadn’t moved from the counter.

his eyes stayed fixed somewhere near the sink rather than directly at either of you, lingering there with an intensity that suggested the opposite wall had suddenly become the most fascinating thing in the apartment.

sungchan stood there with sleep still clinging warmly to his body, face buried against your neck while your scent lingered all over his skin and the marks from last night sat openly across his chest in front of the one person in the apartment who looked least interested in seeing them. sungchan stayed folded around you comfortably enough that the intimacy of it started feeling almost invasive beneath the silence pressing in from the other side of the room.

“jesus christ,” he muttered, voice rough with exhaustion and something meaner sitting underneath it. “you guys are disgusting.”

the words landed flatly into the kitchen air, not loud enough to qualify as a real complaint and somehow worse because of it, the kind of under-the-breath remark that sounded like it had slipped out before he could stop himself.

sungchan finally lifted his head slightly at that, sleep still lingering visibly across his face, softening the sheepish grin pulling briefly at the corner of his mouth while one arm remained looped lazily around your waist.

“sorry bro,” he mumbled, though the apology came out distracted, almost fond in the absentminded way people apologised for things they had no real intention of stopping.

a small ugly thought slipped quietly into place the second you looked at sohee properly again and saw the way his jaw locked tighter beneath the apology, the way his shoulders had gone rigid enough to sharpen the entire line of his posture while he stared fixedly at the counter instead of either of you. something about it scratched at you immediately, something deeply satisfying in watching composure crack visibly across somebody who spent so much time acting above you, disgusted by you, permanently one second away from looking at you like he regretted sharing oxygen in the same room.

suddenly you wanted to see how far it could go.

sungchan had already started pulling away again by then, attention drifting back toward the kitchen half asleep now that he’d acknowledged the comment, but before he could properly step back you caught the silver chain resting against his chest between your fingers and tugged him downward again.

the metal pressed cold briefly against your fingers while his body stumbled back toward yours on instinct, surprise flickering faintly across his face before your mouth crashed against his, hard enough to stop thought completely.

the kiss turned messy almost immediately, not slow or affectionate but excessive in a way that bordered on ugly, all wet mouths and clashing teeth and the sharp pull of the chain still wrapped around your hand while sungchan made a startled sound low in his throat before kissing you back just as hard. your toast stayed abandoned forgotten against the counter while his hands tightened instinctively around your waist again, one sliding upward against your ribs beneath the oversized shirt as the kiss deepened into something far too heavy for the middle of a quiet kitchen at nine in the morning.

when you finally pulled apart for air a second later, it happened slowly enough to feel almost deliberate. a thin string of saliva stretched briefly between your mouths before snapping apart, sungchan still close enough that his breath stayed warm against your lips while his fingers flexed harder against your waist beneath the fabric. his mouth looked swollen already, slightly parted from the force of the kiss, and for a second neither of you moved away properly, still suspended too close together in the thick stale heat hanging through the kitchen.

then you looked at sohee, really looked at him.

sohee remained where he was beside the counter, and for a second his attention seemed to catch on the sight of you still half tangled around sungchan before he remembered himself. the look lingered only briefly, yet it felt longer somehow, long enough for you to watch something dark pass across his face before he finally dragged his gaze elsewhere. whatever composure had been holding together the edges of the morning no longer looked quite as effortless as it had earlier, the disgust sitting openly across his features now in a way that felt almost impossible to misinterpret.

something about the reaction exhilarated you in a way you hadn’t expected, the sheer intensity of his visible discomfort scratching at something mean beneath your skin while the overheated kitchen seemed to close tighter around the three of you. your mouth curled faintly before you could stop it, teeth catching lightly against your lower lip while sohee’s expression hardened further at the sight, and before the silence had time to settle properly again your fingers tightened around sungchan’s chain once more as you pulled him back down toward you.

this kiss deepened immediately, slower this time, but somehow worse for it.

your mouth opened against his without hesitation while sungchan let out another low sound that disappeared into the kiss itself, hands tightening harder around your waist as your fingers drifted downward beneath the oversized shirt, brushing dangerously close to the waistband of his sweatpants. not enough to actually touch him there, but enough that his breathing faltered faintly against your mouth anyway, his body reacting on instinct while the kiss grew heavier, wetter, excessive enough that the entire thing started feeling deliberately uncomfortable beneath the silence hanging through the kitchen.

across the room, sohee shoved himself away from the counter so abruptly the empty glass beside him tipped sideways with a sharp crack against the marble, the sound slicing cleanly through the thick silence hanging in the kitchen and finally pulling sungchan away from your mouth.

the kiss broke messily, slowly, sungchan staying close enough that his breath still lingered warm against your lips while one of his hands remained spread beneath the oversized shirt at your waist. confusion flickered briefly across his face first before the sluggish embarrassment followed behind it, his eyes shifting toward the counter where sohee had already moved away from the sink.

“bro, i—”

the apology barely made it halfway out before sohee cut straight through it by moving again.

he crossed the kitchen too quickly, every movement carrying that same tightly restrained sharpness that had been sitting beneath his skin since walking into the room and finding you there. he grabbed the fallen glass from beside the sink without looking toward either of you once, shoving it upright beneath the tap while water rushed noisily into it. sohee stood there with his back half turned, one hand flattening briefly against the front of his sweatpants near the waistband before dropping away again almost immediately.

sungchan shifted slightly behind you now, finally seeming awake enough to recognise properly that the atmosphere in the kitchen had curdled into something deeply uncomfortable while he stood caught awkwardly in the middle of it. you could feel the hesitation settle through him in the way his grip loosened fractionally at your waist, torn somewhere between lingering embarrassment and the instinctive need to smooth things over before they escalated further.

but sohee clearly had no interest in helping him do that.

he drained the glass of water too quickly before shoving it back into the sink with another dull clatter, still refusing to look directly at either of you while he reached for the hoodie hanging over one of the kitchen chairs. he dragged it over his head in one rough motion, messy hair catching briefly beneath the fabric before stepping toward the hallway again, his voice cut low through the kitchen without him bothering to turn around.

“you guys make me sick.”

the words landed heavily enough to seem to settle into the walls themselves, sungchan going still behind you for a second after that, caught halfway between guilt and frustration while sohee disappeared down the hallway without waiting for a response, the sound of his bedroom door shutting a moment later muffled but firm enough to linger afterward in the silence.

the apartment felt strangely hollow once he was gone, not calmer, just empty.

the tap still dripped steadily into the sink beside the abandoned glass and somewhere behind you sungchan exhaled softly through his nose before letting his forehead drop briefly against your shoulder. you could already feel him trying to think through whatever had just happened, trying to rearrange it into something smaller and less uncomfortable than it actually was, but your attention stayed fixed on the hallway instead, on the lingering echo of sohee’s reaction and the sharp ugly thrill that still sat curling low in your chest because of it.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

a week later, exhaustion had settled so deeply into your body that it no longer arrived in waves anymore. it simply existed there constantly, stitched into your muscles and behind your eyes, dragging everything slightly out of focus no matter how much caffeine you poured into yourself to fight it.

by the time you finally submitted the essay for your literature class due that morning, your brain already felt half rotten from lack of sleep, thoughts moving sluggishly beneath the fluorescent glow of the lamp in your room after spending most of the night switching uselessly between half-written paragraphs and sungchan’s mouth whenever he distracted you from working long enough to pull you back into bed.

college had started feeling like that lately. not difficult exactly, just repetitive in a way that slowly hollowed the days into each other until everything blurred together into the same cycle of unfinished assignments, energy drinks, overcrowded lecture halls and sleeping far too little before forcing yourself awake to do it all over again.

by noon your entire body ached with tiredness. two empty energy drink cans sat crushed inside your tote bag alongside crumpled snack wrappers and loose sheets of annotated readings you hadn’t touched properly in days, and every sound around you felt louder than it should have beneath the dull headache pressing steadily behind your temples. conversations overlapped endlessly through the hallways outside the lecture theatres, hundreds of voices bleeding together beneath squeaking trainers against polished floors and the constant buzz of phones vibrating across desks, while groups of students drifted lazily between classes clutching iced coffees.

you barely registered most of it anymore while making your way through campus, shoulders heavy beneath your bag as another cold gust of wind followed students in through the automatic doors, dragging yourself toward the cafeteria.

the place was already packed when you stepped inside, tables crowded with half-open laptops, untouched salads, coffee cups balanced dangerously close to lecture notes. your eyes found your friends near the middle of the cafeteria almost immediately.

mina spotted you first. her entire face twisted the second you approached the table, somewhere between concern and outright disbelief before she burst into laughter loud enough to make chaewon glance up from her phone too.

“oh my god,” chaewon snorted, shoving her tray slightly aside to make room for your bag when you reached them.

“you look actually dead.”

you dropped into the empty chair beside them without even bothering to answer properly, letting your forehead fall heavily against the cool surface of the table with a groan muffled into crossed arms.

“don’t talk to me,” you muttered weakly. “if anybody speaks too loudly near me i might genuinely throw up.”

jiwon laughed from across the table while tearing open another ketchup packet. the sugary iced coffee chaewon pushed toward you smelled almost painfully sweet when it landed beside your elbow.

still, you took it immediately.

your fingers curled around the cold plastic cup while the girls slipped easily back into conversation around you, gossip bleeding between complaints about assignments and lectures in the effortless way it always did whenever the four of you ended up together between classes. 

“what time did you even go to bed this time?” jiwon asked eventually, watching you with the same mixture of concern and judgement people usually reserved for raccoons digging through bins at three in the morning.

you didn’t even bother lifting your head properly from the table when you answered.

“that’s presuming i went to bed.”

“maybe,” mina started, carefully setting her coffee cup down, “if you spent less time fucking sungchan and more time actually doing the work assigned to you, you wouldn’t constantly look like you’re on the verge of death.”

jiwon gasped immediately despite the smile pulling at her mouth while chaewon nearly choked on one of her fries, shoulders shaking with laughter as you lifted your middle finger weakly in response.

“it’s for health reasons,” you muttered flatly.

“stress is bad for the body. what am i supposed to do when i need tension relief? obviously i get fucked by sungchan.”

“yeah but every other night?” she shot back. “surely you’re not that stressed.”

“you’d be surprised.”

mina stared at you another second before something visibly clicked behind her eyes, and then suddenly she was folding over the table cackling so hard she could barely get the words out properly.

“wait—” she wheezed, grabbing jiwon’s sleeve for support while laughing harder. “oh my god, sungchan’s literally just your stress ball. no, seriously, think about it. because he has balls and i bet you squeeze those when you’re stressed too—”

chaewon nearly slammed her forehead into the table laughing while jiwon shouted a sharp “mina!”, loud enough to draw annoyed glances from another table nearby, but you only rolled your eyes despite the smile tugging faintly at your mouth now.

“laugh all you want,” you muttered. “you’re just bitter because jaehyun got a girlfriend and now you can’t call him every weekend to dick you down anymore.”

her smile faltered into exaggerated offence while the others burst into louder laughter at her expense this time, and she pointed at you with a deeply wounded expression plastered across her face.

“that’s a touchy subject actually,” she informed the table solemnly. “i’m still in mourning.”

“thoughts and prayers,” you replied dryly before taking another sip of coffee.

“i do wish i had a sungchan though,” she admitted after a second. “like objectively speaking, it must be nice having somebody that obsessed with you. and he's good in bed.”

“it is,” you answered easily, stretching back slightly in your chair now that the caffeine had finally started hitting your bloodstream.

“when he’s not being emotional about everything. i swear every time we fuck he starts talking about how much he misses me or how i’m the love of his life or whatever.”

“this pussy must genuinely be made out of gold,” you finished with a shrug.

“ENOUGH.”

“oh my god, please shut up.”

“nobody asked for this.”

you only laughed this time, slower and more awake now while mina stared across the table looking personally offended.

“oh,” chaewon muttered suddenly, eyebrows lifting faintly. “speak of the devil.”

you frowned before turning slightly in your seat, following her line of sight across the room.

sungchan had just stepped into the cafeteria, one hand hooked loosely around the strap of his bag while the other pushed distractedly through his hair as though he’d only just dragged himself awake properly within the last hour. people greeted him constantly without seeming to think about it and sungchan slowed for everyone without ever seeming irritated by it.

he reached the table a few minutes later, dropping his bag carelessly beside the empty chair nearest to you before leaning down automatically, one hand brushing lightly against the back of your seat as his mouth pressed briefly against your cheek in greeting.

“you look exhausted,” he murmured quietly.

“i am exhausted.”

his laugh stayed low beneath the surrounding cafeteria noise while he straightened again, finally acknowledging the rest of the table with an easy nod.

“hi.”

greetings circled back casually enough between your friends and him, familiar and brief after two years of watching sungchan orbit in and out of your life in one form or another.

the conversation flowed back into itself after that, with the same careless familiarity that always seemed to exist whenever your friends gathered together long enough between lectures. chaewon had already started complaining again about one of her professors assigning another reading packet nobody intended to finish while jiwon scrolled halfheartedly through her calendar trying to figure out when exactly all of her deadlines had become impossible to keep track of. beside you sungchan stole fries from mina’s tray with the kind of absent entitlement that suggested he’d been doing it for years.

absentmindedly, your eyes wandered around the room, stopping on two girls near the vending machines. you recognised one of them properly now that you looked longer, dark hair tucked behind one ear while she leaned lazily against the wall listening to the other girl speak. 

yuna.

you’d seen her around enough times through sungchan’s wider social circle to place her immediately, usually lingering around parties with some of sohee’s friends or sitting near them during campus events. not close enough to matter personally, but familiar enough.

and now she was looking directly toward your table in brief glances threaded between conversation, her attention flicking toward sungchan beside you before shifting quickly back toward the girl she was talking to. the other girl noticed it too eventually, following yuna’s gaze until both of them looked toward your table at the exact moment sungchan leaned closer to steal the iced coffee from your hand without asking first.

normally you probably wouldn’t have thought much of it. people knew sungchan and they looked at sungchan all the time. still, something about the exchange sat strangely with you anyway, even after your attention returned to the conversation unfolding around the table.

beside you, sungchan remained completely oblivious to any of it.

mina slapped his hand away for what was probably the fourth time after catching him reaching across the table to steal another fry from her tray, and the sound of his laugh slipped easily into the noise of the cafeteria while he leaned back in his chair.

“you genuinely eat like somebody raised in captivity,” mina informed him flatly while dragging her tray farther out of his reach.

“you’ve eaten more of my food than your own.”

“sharing builds community.”

“i don’t want to build a community with you, dimwit.”

sungchan only grinned at that, slow and unbothered, before his knee knocked lightly against yours again beneath the table. then, from the corner of your eye, movement caught your attention again.

yuna had started walking toward your table. the girl beside her followed half a step behind while yuna adjusted the sleeve of her sweater absently, gaze fixed toward sungchan now with the casual confidence of somebody approaching a conversation she expected to slide into easily. 

“hey,” yuna greeted once she reached the table, voice light while the girl beside her hovered quietly near her shoulder. 

most of her attention settled on sungchan immediately, though not naturally enough to completely disguise the awareness sitting underneath it. you caught it anyway in the brief flickers of her gaze toward you and back again, the slight hesitation before speaking, like she was trying to navigate around something awkward without fully understanding where the awkwardness had even come from in the first place.

sungchan looked up first, expression easing easily into recognition. “oh, hey yuna. minji.”

“we’re still doing minseok’s party tomorrow,” she said. “you’re coming, right?”

“probably,” sungchan answered. “i completely forgot that was this weekend.”

“you disappeared halfway through the last one,” minji added with a laugh. “you still owe yuna for abandoning her during beer pong.”

sungchan smiled faintly beneath the accusation, rubbing absently at the back of his neck.“i had an early class the next day. i couldn't stay up late like the rest of you guys.”

“sure,” yuna replied, clearly unconvinced.

the smile pulling at her mouth lingered a second longer before she shifted the coffee cup between her hands and looked back at him properly.

“well, you can make it up to me tomorrow.”

“how?”

“show up before everyone else for once.”

the answer came easily enough that it almost sounded rehearsed.

“i'm serious. everybody always turns up late anyway.” her head tilted slightly toward him. “come early with me. we can get drinks before the place gets packed and i'll decide whether i've forgiven you yet.”

there was nothing overtly inappropriate in the suggestion itself. if anything, the confidence behind it was what made it obvious. the assumption that he would say yes, that there was room for the question in the first place.

the shift in sungchan happened almost immediately afterward, the easy openness he'd greeted her with moments earlier tightened faintly around the edges while his eyes flicked instinctively toward you before returning to her again, like he'd noticed that this conversation was no longer socially neutral.

“uh,” he started, laughter slipping awkwardly beneath his breath while one hand settled loosely against the side of your chair near your waist.

“i was actually planning on going with them.”

his gaze drifted briefly toward you.

“and honestly i don't think y/n would be too happy if i disappeared with somebody else before the party.”

his tone stayed gentle throughout it, apologetic almost, the kind of soft rejection only somebody like sungchan could deliver without making the other person feel openly embarrassed. still, the effect landed immediately.

you watched confusion surface visibly across yuna’s face before she could smooth it away. not jealousy, not even annoyance, just genuine confusion.

minji looked between you and sungchan too now, expression faltering slightly as though the picture sitting in front of her no longer matched the version she’d been carrying around beforehand.

“oh,” she said slowly. “i didn’t realise you guys were..”

the silence that followed settled thickly across the table, because at the exact same moment sungchan answered, you did too.

“we’re not—”

“we’re figuring things out.”

the overlap cut awkwardly through the middle of the conversation before collapsing into silence all over again, and beside you sungchan immediately stopped speaking while minji visibly realised she’d stepped into something far messier than she’d originally intended approaching the table.

“sorry,” she corrected quickly. “i just thought—”

she hesitated briefly, eyes flicking toward yuna before continuing automatically.

“but that’s not what sohe—”

yuna reacted instantly.

“we should go,” she interrupted sharply over the end of the sentence, fingers catching lightly around her friend’s wrist before she could finish whatever she’d been about to say. awkwardness had started creeping visibly into both their expressions now, discomfort spreading fast.

they were leaving before anybody else could properly respond, disappearing back into the noise of the cafeteria while the strange heaviness left behind stretched across the table in their absence.

mina was the first one to break the silence.

“i’ll give you five bucks right now,” she muttered flatly, watching the two girls retreat across the cafeteria, “if sohee’s not the one feeding people bullshit about the two of you."

the mention of his name landed unpleasantly in the middle of your chest, like a match against something already overheated.

you felt it almost instantly, that ugly flare of annoyance twisting sharper beneath your ribs now that the pieces had finally started arranging themselves properly together.

lee sohee. of course it was him. it had to be.

across from you, chaewon rolled her eyes faintly before leaning back into her chair with an expression somewhere between disbelief and exhaustion.

“that guy genuinely needs psychiatric help,” she muttered. “like actually.”

“honestly, at this point i'd be more surprised if it wasn't.”

“guys,” sungchan cut in quietly, the discomfort finally visible now in the slight tension pulling between his brows. “why would sohee even be talking about us?”

mina turned toward him so quickly it almost made you laugh.

“sungchan.”

“what?”

“you cannot be serious.”

“i am serious,” he answered, though the confidence behind it already sounded weaker now.

“because he hates her,” chaewon replied flatly, gesturing vaguely toward you. “have we all forgotten that?”

“okay,” sungchan sighed, rubbing tiredly at the back of his neck. “he doesn't like her. we all know that. but that's completely different from him going around talking about us to random people.”

“is it?” mina asked.

the question hung there for a second.

“because yuna didn't act like somebody taking a shot in the dark. she acted like somebody who thought she had a genuine chance.”

“we were broken up for a while,” sungchan replied, though there was already less certainty behind it than before. “people know that.”

“and now we're not,” you said flatly.

sungchan's eyes flicked toward you.

“that's not—”

“then what exactly is it?” irritation slipped into your voice before you could stop it. “because she seemed pretty comfortable asking you to ditch me and go drink with her alone.”

“i'm just saying i don't think sohee would do something like that.”

“really?" mina asked with a lifted eyebrow.

“i don't know,” he said after a moment, quieter now. “i just think there's probably another explanation.”

nobody at the table looked particularly convinced, least of all you.

there was something deeply violating about the assumption sitting underneath it all in a way you struggled to articulate properly even to yourself. the knowledge that somebody who already looked at you with such obvious contempt had apparently spent enough time talking about your private life for it to start leaking outward into other social circles entirely.

you did not care whether people thought you and sungchan were serious. you did not even particularly care whether people thought the situation between you was messy. what you cared about was the fact your business had somehow stopped being yours.

beside you, sungchan shifted slightly in his chair before his hand brushed lightly against your knee beneath the table, tentative enough to feel almost cautious now. you could tell he was trying to smooth things over before they became something uglier, trying to keep the fragile balance he always seemed desperate to maintain between you and sohee from cracking open completely in front of him.

but the frustration had already rooted itself too deeply by then to disappear so easily, sitting low and heavy, simmering steadily beneath your skin in a way that refused to cool no matter how much you tried brushing it aside afterward.

it lingered long after the conversation moved on. through the rest of your lectures while your attention drifted uselessly between powerpoint slides and unfinished notes. through the walk back to your apartment afterward. through the messages mina kept sending later that evening complaining about sohee on your behalf. 

it followed you all the way through to the next evening in quiet irritating waves, your apartment slowly filling with noise as music vibrated low through the walls as you all got ready for minseok's party. makeup products cluttered every available surface around your vanity, tangled necklaces mixed between half-zipped bags and abandoned hair clips while the sharp smell of perfume and setting spray settled thickly through the room beneath the heat coming from your curling iron left running against the counter.

outside the windows the city glowed softly beneath the darkening sky, headlights smearing into blurred ribbons of white and gold against rain-damp streets while somewhere below your apartment building groups of students drifted between bars and pre-drinks wrapped in jackets against the cold. 

usually the ritual of getting ready helped smooth you back into yourself again. there was something easy about nights like this most of the time, sitting cross-legged on the floor while mina argued loudly about outfits she claimed to hate five minutes after choosing them herself, chaewon stealing your lip gloss without asking, jiwon stretched across your bed scrolling absentmindedly through playlists trying to find music everyone agreed on.

but tonight your patience felt thinner than usual. annoyance sat there stubbornly, dull and oppressive and impossible to ignore no matter how many times you tried pushing the entire situation to the back of your mind.

you stood in front of the mirror dragging eyeliner carefully along your lashline while mina hovered behind you trying to clasp your necklace into place with noticeably declining patience.

“hold still,” she complained.

“i am holding still.”

“you keep moving your head.”

“because you’re yanking my shoulder off.”

mina clicked her tongue in annoyance before finally managing to fasten the necklace properly. “there. god. you act like a difficult toddler.”

you fell quiet, turning back to your hair as sohee's name surfaced again, mina’s earlier jokes about committing acts of violence against him still sitting somewhere in the back of your head.

behind you, chaewon glanced up from where she sat curled against the edge of your bed adjusting the strap of her heel.

“if he says one weird thing to you tonight i’m throwing my drink at him.”

“please don’t,” jiwon sighed from the pillows. “i don’t wanna get kicked out just because drunk chae wants to get activated.”

“why are we acting like i’m the problem? he’s literally evil. spawn of satan even."

despite yourself, a small laugh escaped through your nose at that.

the sound of the apartment buzzer cut briefly through the music, jiwon glancing up first from where she sat cross-legged near the end of your bed.

“that’s probably sungchan,” she said, pushing herself up from the mattress while smoothing down the front of her skirt.

“finally. if mina keeps changing outfits we’re genuinely never leaving this apartment.”

“i heard that,”mina shouted from somewhere inside your bathroom.

the apartment door opened less than a minute later followed by the low murmur of voices drifting faintly down the hallway before footsteps approached your bedroom. you barely looked up at first, attention fixed on the careful line of lip liner gliding across your mouth through the mirror before giving him a glance and he looked good tonight, annoyingly good, honestly.

the black shirt stretched cleanly across his chest and shoulders beneath the leather jacket hanging open against his frame while silver glinted softly at his throat from the chain resting against his skin. his jeans sat low against his hips in that careless way that somehow only made him look broader, longer, and hanging loosely from one of the belt loops near his thigh was the small basketball charm you’d bought for him months ago during one of those stupid little shopping trips neither of you had even planned on turning into a date at the time. you had forgotten about it entirely until now.

“damn,” he laughed quietly, gaze moving over the disaster zone of makeup and clothes covering nearly every surface. 

“it looks like a war zone in here.”

he greeted the others easily enough, exchanging quick familiarities. through all of it you barely shifted from the mirror, still smoothing carefully along the edge of your bottom lip while the conversation blurred softly together behind you.

warmth settled suddenly against your back. sungchan’s hands slid loosely around your waist from behind while he leaned forward enough for his chin to rest against your shoulder, the weight of him familiar and heavy.

“hi,” he murmured quietly.

you hummed absently in response without pausing your makeup, continuing to blend the edge of the liner with your fingertip while his hold around your waist tightened slightly for a second like he was trying to pull himself a little closer.

the shift in him afterward was subtle as he straightened slightly behind you before one of his hands slipped upward from your waist. his fingers brushed lightly along your jaw before hooking gently beneath your chin, angling your face back toward him until your eyes finally met his properly through the mirror. up close, the concern sitting beneath his expression became easier to read, softened into the slight pull between his brows and the careful way his gaze searched yours like he was trying to gauge what mood he had walked into tonight before deciding how to handle it.

“you’re still mad at me."

you rolled your eyes faintly, though not with much real energy behind it. “i’m not mad.”

the corner of his mouth twitched slightly at that like he did not believe you for even a second. his thumb brushed once absently beneath your jaw while he continued watching you, warm and patient in that way that normally made it impossible to stay irritated with him for very long.

behind you mina made a loud disgusted noise from somewhere near the bed, complaining dramatically about the two of you, but neither of you paid much attention to her. the previous night still sat unpleasantly between you both, unresolved in that quiet lingering way arguments sometimes became when neither person felt strongly enough to keep fighting but neither fully let the irritation go either.

the argument itself had not even been particularly serious in hindsight. sungchan had done what he always did whenever things involving sohee started turning ugly, trying to soften the situation before it escalated any further while you grew increasingly annoyed by how determined he seemed to be to keep the peace no matter who ended up frustrated in the process. he had told you people talked all the time, that you were blowing things out of proportion and to not let it get to you so much.

“i just think you’re letting it bother you too much,” he said carefully after a moment, voice quieter now beneath the music still playing through the apartment.

“people say stupid shit all the time, it doesn’t matter as long as we know what the truth is.”

you reached automatically for your lipgloss again before answering, twisting the lid of the tube open slower than necessary while irritation curled low and unpleasant through your chest all over again. 

“yeah,” you replied coolly, finally meeting his eyes through the mirror once more, “and your best friend seems to enjoy giving them material.”

the discomfort crossing his face afterward appeared immediately, something close to exhaustion, like he could already feel the conversation slipping toward the same place it always did whenever sohee became involved somehow. around the room the others fell quieter without meaning to.

"you sure love defending him too."

“i’m not defending him,” sungchan said softly after a second.

a quiet laugh escaped through your nose before you twisted the lipgloss shut harder than necessary and finally turned properly toward him now, the movement forcing him to take half a step back to make room between your bodies.

“you always say that right before defending him.”

something flickered faintly across his face at that. it was the exact same expression he used to wear during arguments toward the end of your relationship, back when every disagreement somehow managed to stretch itself across entire days because sungchan could never stop himself from trying to keep everybody happy at once. even when things between you had already started rotting quietly beneath the surface, he still approached conflict the same way every single time, desperate to smooth rough edges down before anybody could get hurt badly enough to leave permanent damage behind. 

arguments with him never burned hot and fast. they dragged, lingered, turned into exhausted half-conversations at three in the morning and careful apologies neither of you fully meant just because sungchan hated tension enough to keep trying to fix it long after there was anything left worth fixing.

you could already feel this conversation threatening to become the same thing if it continued.

sungchan exhaled quietly through his nose, gaze dropping briefly toward the floor before lifting back toward you again. he opened his mouth like he was about to explain himself further, probably something measured and reasonable and endlessly diplomatic that would only irritate you more the longer he spoke, but before either of you could continue, chaewon abruptly stepped between the two of you holding out a shot glass toward your chest with the exhausted expression of somebody interrupting children mid argument.

“absolutely not,” she announced flatly while pressing the drink into your hand. 

“whatever weird divorced energy this is can wait until after the party."

the interruption broke the tension just enough for the room to loosen around the edges again. 

sungchan finally gave up on whatever he had been about to say, rubbing tiredly at the back of his neck before reaching automatically for your jacket instead. you tipped the shot back in one swallow, cheap alcohol burning sharply down your throat as everybody finally started gathering their things to leave.

by the time you had arrived near minseok’s house the alcohol had softened the edges of your mood slightly. the drive over had dissolved mostly into overlapping noise from the girls in the backseat arguing over music and shouting half-drunk stories over one another while sungchan drove with one hand loose against the steering wheel, city lights sliding in blurred streaks across the sharp angles of his face every time another car passed in the opposite direction.

the party was already spilling halfway out onto the street by the time you got there.

music thundered loudly enough that you could feel the bass vibrating through the pavement before you even stepped fully out of the car, warm bodies crowding the front lawn in loose clusters beneath strings of coloured lights. the sharp earthy smell of weed already bleeding thickly into the cold night air before you even reached the front door and inside felt worse, hotter.

the kind of suffocating heat that only existed inside overcrowded college parties where too many bodies had been packed together for too many hours already, sweat and cheap alcohol settling heavily into the air beneath flashing strobe lights that painted everything in brief violent bursts of colour. 

mina grabbed your wrist almost immediately after stepping inside so nobody lost each other in the crowd, chaewon following close behind while sungchan stayed automatically at your back guiding you through the bodies pressing shoulder to shoulder around the entrance hallway. every few steps somebody stopped him to say hello, and each time he responded easily enough before turning back toward your group again almost immediately.

within the first twenty minutes the party had already started dissolving your group apart in the same natural way it always did once enough alcohol and noise got involved. chaewon disappeared first after loudly announcing she was “finding something stronger before she developed sobriety,” vanishing somewhere toward the kitchen with a determined expression and mina immediately yelling after her not to accept mystery jungle juice from engineering students again. not even five minutes later mina herself had dragged jiwon toward the centre of the living room where people were already dancing with the kind of reckless commitment usually reserved for much later in the night, disappearing quickly into the shifting crowd before either of them could be talked out of it.

you let them go without much thought. honestly, all you really wanted at that point was to get drunk enough for your brain to finally quiet down. the irritation from the past two days still lingered stubbornly and the more you tried not to think about it, the more it kept circling back anyway, ugly in its persistence.

so instead you drank. a vodka soda somebody shoved into your hand near the kitchen. half of mina’s drink that she had abandoned on the counter you leaned against. another shot pressed into your palm by somebody you vaguely recognised from one of your classes.

after a while the alcohol began settling properly into your bloodstream, loosening something inside you. your body felt lighter than it had earlier, thoughts moving a little slower around the edges while warmth lingered steadily across your cheeks. every now and then you caught yourself swaying slightly when you stopped moving for too long, the room never quite spinning but shifting just enough beneath your feet to remind you exactly how much you'd already had to drink.

eventually you ended up leaning against the wall near the entrance to the kitchen, momentarily removed from the worst of the crowd while taking another slow sip from your drink. from there you could still see sungchan not too far away across the room, trapped in conversation with two guys from the volleyball society while somebody else kept trying unsuccessfully to pull him into a drinking game happening near the kitchen island.

after another few minutes sungchan finally seemed to escape whatever conversation had trapped him across the room. not that it made much difference at first. people still kept stopping him on the way back, brief interruptions stretching what should have been a simple walk across the room into something noticeably longer. from where you stood, half distracted by the vodka settling warmly through your bloodstream, the whole thing felt oddly familiar. sungchan had always moved through rooms like that, never quite belonging entirely to himself once enough people were around.

“hey,” sungchan said once he stopped in front of you, voice lowered instinctively now that he was close enough not to shout over the music.

his hand settled automatically against the small of your back while he spoke, fingers spreading lightly over the exposed skin there before his thumb started moving in slow absentminded circles against one of the dimples near your spine. standing this close, the rest of the room seemed to narrow around him until most of what you could see was leather, broad shoulders and the line of his chest. his leather jacket smelled faintly like alcohol and cologne, warmth radiating from him strongly enough after spending the last hour moving through overcrowded rooms that it almost clung against your skin too.

for a few seconds neither of you really said anything while the crowd shifted around you in restless waves, then sungchan’s mouth twitched slightly.

“no dancing on tables tonight?”

despite yourself, a brief grin pulled at your mouth before you tipped your head back lightly against the wall behind you.

“definitely not in minseok’s apartment,” you answered dryly. “god knows what’s been done on that counter.”

the laugh that escaped him came easy, low and genuine enough to pull a quieter one from you too before the sound dissolved naturally back into the chaos around you. afterward the moment softened slightly into something quieter between the two of you, sungchan still standing close while his eyes searched your face more carefully now that you had finally smiled at him properly for the first time all evening.

“and us?” he asked after a moment, voice gentler now beneath the noise surrounding you. “we’re okay?”

instead of answering immediately, you lifted the drink toward your lips only to realise the cup was empty, ice knocking quietly against the plastic while your gaze drifted briefly somewhere over his shoulder.

there was no point dragging this out anyway.

sungchan was not your boyfriend anymore, and the entire reason the two of you had slipped into this strange undefined limbo in the first place was specifically to avoid situations like this, avoid expectations and conversations and the slow exhausting feeling of slipping back into old habits that demanded far more emotional investment than you actually wanted to give him. the relationship had already died once beneath the weight of too many unresolved fractures.

so you just placed the empty cup into his hands instead.

“we will be if you get me a refill.”

something visibly eased across his face at that, subtle but immediate enough for you to catch it anyway.

“one vodka lemonade,” he said while lifting the cup slightly in acknowledgment, “coming right up.”

then he gave a stupid little salute that made you snort quietly beneath your breath before finally stepping away from in front of you and disappearing back toward the kitchen, the crowd parting around his broad frame as your eyes followed him automatically across the room.

halfway toward the kitchen, he spotted sohee. you noticed the recognition immediately in the way sungchan’s pace shifted slightly before he angled naturally toward the opposite side of the room, one hand still holding your empty cup while he lifted the other briefly in greeting across the crowd.

and that was when you saw sohee properly for the first time that night.

the irritation that had been sitting stubbornly for the past two days seemed to sharpen immediately the second your eyes landed on him, spreading through your body in a way that felt almost physical. it settled low beneath your ribs before unfurling slowly outward, hot enough that your chest burned with it.

he stood near the corner of the living room beside one of the speakers, half-leaning back against the wall with a drink hanging loose from his fingers. the heat inside the house had softened him slightly around the edges compared to the version of him you usually saw, dark blond hair messier now where either his own hands or somebody else’s had clearly pushed through it repeatedly throughout the night, strands falling low across his forehead.

the black sleeveless top he wore clung close enough to show the lean definition of his torso beneath it, exposing toned arms already lightly flushed from alcohol while low-rise jeans hung carelessly against narrow hips secured with a dark belt sitting loose enough for the white waistband of his calvin klein boxers to become briefly visible whenever he shifted position or laughed.

and worst of all, he looked comfortable. comfortable enough that something about it felt almost disorientating to witness after months of dealing with the version of him that existed only around you, all cold silences and passive cruelty and sharp little comments designed to poison the atmosphere the second you walked into it.

right now none of that seemed visible anywhere on him. he was laughing quietly at something sungchan said after finally reaching him, shoulders loose while one of his friends shoved hard against his arm and nearly knocked the drink from his hand entirely. instead of snapping like you half expected him to, sohee only laughed again before pushing back at the guy’s chest while the rest of the group crowded around them shouted drunkenly over the music.

you hated that, hated the sharp imbalance of it. hated the fact that you had spent hours replaying unfinished sentences and ugly implications in your head while he apparently moved through life untouched by any of it.

it made something bitter curl tighter inside your chest.

almost like sungchan could physically feel the weight of your stare from across the room and suddenly remembered why he had walked away from you in the first place, his expression shifted slightly. he glanced back toward where you stood against the wall before nodding once toward the kitchen with his head, lifting your empty cup briefly in indication that he was finally going to get the refill he had promised you.

instinctively, your gaze found sohee again, almost before you properly realised you were searching for him, some part of you already anticipating the familiar shift that usually happened whenever he noticed your presence somewhere nearby. over the past few months you had become used to it despite yourself, the visible hardening that entered his expression the second his eyes landed on you, the subtle tightening through his shoulders and jaw, the way entire rooms seemed to cool several degrees whenever the two of you occupied the same space for too long.

but nothing happened.

even after sungchan stepped away, sohee never looked in your direction. he remained where he was near the speaker, one shoulder resting lazily against the wall while conversation continued around him, answering whatever was being said with the same easy familiarity as before without once glancing across the room.

your jaw tightened faintly while you continued staring across the room longer than you probably should have. from this distance it would have been impossible for him not to know you were there. sungchan had literally just walked away from your side moments earlier. there was no realistic way sohee had somehow failed to notice that.

which meant he was choosing not to look.

after all the hostility and sharp silences and passive cruelty that seemed to follow him every time the two of you ended up trapped in the same room together, some ugly part of you had still expected recognition the second his eyes landed on you tonight. at least acknowledgment.

instead you got nothing.

after everything, the indifference felt oddly insulting, the humiliating awareness that you had spent nearly forty-eight hours carrying this situation around in your head while sohee stood twenty feet away looking completely untouched by any of it.

your eyes stayed fixed stubbornly across the room despite yourself, following the careless rhythm of his movements. the absent way he pushed his hair back from his forehead while listening to somebody beside him speak, the slight tilt of his mouth whenever another laugh escaped him, the complete absence of that familiar guardedness while people crowded around him as though nothing in the world required his attention beyond the conversation he was already having.

sungchan finally reappeared through the crowd carrying a fresh drink in one hand while a small group of his friends followed loosely behind him, the familiar shape of johnny immediately recognisable. wonbin walked beside him saying something that made the others laugh while somebody farther behind nearly stumbled directly into the kitchen counter hard enough to send drinks sloshing over the edge.

sungchan reached you first.

“here you go, m’lady,” he said with a grin while holding the vodka lemonade out toward you, condensation already dripping cold against his fingers from the plastic cup. the stupid theatricality of it almost pulled another smile from you, and beside him johnny immediately snorted.

“god,” he muttered dramatically, slinging an arm across wonbin’s shoulders. “you two make me feel violently single.”

“that sounds personal,” you answered dryly before finally taking the drink from sungchan’s hand.

johnny pointed vaguely toward you like he had just been deeply validated somehow while the rest of the group laughed behind him.

the warmth in his expression softened slightly once your fingers wrapped around the drink he had brought back for you, like the simple act of accepting it had eased something inside him again after the strange tension lingering between you both all evening. he stayed standing close enough that his shoulder brushed lightly against yours every time somebody shoved past too roughly through the crowd, broad frame instinctively angling slightly in front of you whenever groups stumbled too near.

“wonbin apparently has some new strain he’s been talking about for like three days straight,” sungchan said after a moment, glancing briefly toward the front hallway where people kept drifting in and out carrying coats and cigarettes. “they’re gonna smoke outside for a bit.”

wonbin lifted his hands immediately in self defence. “because unlike the rest of you degenerates, i actually value quality when it comes to what i'm smoking."

“you bought it from a guy that calls himself spider,” johnny replied flatly.

“that means nothing.”

“that means literally everything.”

another wave of laughter rolled loosely through the group while sungchan looked back toward you again, expression gentler now beneath the flashing lights. “you wanna come?” he asked. “it’s quieter outside.”

“i’m okay,” you answered before lifting the drink toward your lips.

sungchan studied your face for a second longer like he was trying to decide whether he believed you before eventually nodding anyway. he leaned down afterward before pressing a quick kiss against your cheek.

“don’t disappear,” he murmured lightly near your ear.

then he finally stepped away again, johnny immediately slinging an arm across sungchan’s shoulders the second they turned toward the front door while wonbin continued loudly defending his self proclaimed mastery in the art of weed purchasing. you watched them disappear gradually into the shifting crowd beneath the lights until the front door finally opened.

your focus moved vaguely between the drink in your hand and the movement across the room without fully settling on either for very long until suddenly mina appeared beside you again looking flushed and glowing from dancing, strands of hair sticking lightly against her forehead while chaewon followed close behind fanning herself dramatically with somebody’s abandoned paper plate.

“oh my god,” mina breathed the second she reached you, still half laughing from whatever had just happened on the dance floor. “have you literally been standing here this entire time?”

you lifted the vodka lemonade vaguely in response before taking another sip. “i’ve moved at least twice actually.”

“who are you and what have you done with my fun best friend?”

chaewon leaned heavily against the wall beside you afterward, chest still rising slightly faster from dancing while the gloss on her lips had smudged faintly around the edges.

“ignore her,” she sighed dramatically before immediately grabbing your wrist. “listen to me instead because i think i finally found the man who’s gonna help me forget jaehyun.”

you raised an eyebrow slowly. “really?”

“you should have seen her” mina cut in immediately. “she was dancing on this guy like rent was due.”

“okay first of all,” chaewon snapped while fixing her hair in the reflection of the darkened window beside you, “he was really hot.”

“he looks like he hasn't had a single productive thought in a week.”

“i don't need a philosopher, i need a hot guy to fuck me.”

despite yourself, a quieter laugh escaped through your nose at that while chaewon continued ranting passionately about how she deserved to rebound in peace without being judged for it. around you the party seemed almost softer for a moment beneath the familiar rhythm of your friends talking over one another, the conversation managing to pull you out of your own head for a moment. while mina reached over to steal a sip from your drink before immediately grimacing at how strong it was.

“jesus christ,” she coughed. “what is wrong with you?”

“a lot actually.”

another wave of laughter passed between the three of you while chaewon suddenly glanced back toward the centre of the living room where a new song had apparently started, her expression changing instantly.

“oh absolutely not,” she gasped while grabbing mina’s arm. “they’re playing megan thee stallion. we have to go back immediately.”

mina groaned dramatically toward the ceiling before looking back at you again. “come with us this time,” she demanded. “you’ve been standing here looking emotionally unavailable for like forty minutes.”

“i’m fine here.”

“that look on your face proves otherwise.”

you only rolled your eyes before taking another sip from your drink, the cold sting of vodka and lemonade sliding numbingly down your throat while the bass continued vibrating through your chest.

"i don't need a babysitter, im fine."

mina hesitated for a second longer, eyes narrowing slightly like she was trying to decide whether to push harder. “you sure?”

“go dance,” you said finally, softer this time. “i’ll survive without supervision for five minutes.”

for all their dramatics and constant complaining, the hesitation lingering there was real enough that warmth flickered faintly through your chest despite yourself. eventually mina squeezed briefly at your arm before finally relenting.

“fine,” she sighed. “but if you suddenly become fun again, come find us.”

the two of them disappeared back into the crowd together, swallowed so quickly by the house that within seconds it was impossible to tell where they'd gone.

for a while you stayed exactly where you were, shoulder resting lightly against the wall while the night carried on around you without requiring much participation. conversations bled together into background noise, faces becoming increasingly difficult to keep track of the more you drank. the vodka had softened the edges of everything just enough that time started slipping strangely.

your gaze drifted without purpose at first, aimless beneath the haze settling slowly over your thoughts. then, inevitably, your eyes found sohee again.

this time he had drifted slightly away from the larger group, and the sight that greeted you lodged beneath your skin almost instantly. yuna stood close enough to him now that her body nearly brushed his chest while she balanced lightly onto the balls of her feet, one hand resting against the back of his neck to pull him lower toward her mouth so he could hear her properly over the music.

sohee bent automatically at the waist without hesitation, broad shoulders shifting beneath the thin black fabric stretched tightly across his back while his arms folded loosely across his chest, forearms flexing faintly beneath flushed skin from the movement. from this distance you could not hear a single word being exchanged between them, only the shape of the conversation disappearing entirely beneath the relentless bass swallowing the room whole.

still, something inside you tightened immediately at the sight.

because despite the complete lack of evidence, despite how irrational it actually was, you could not stop the immediate certainty settling low and poisonous inside your chest that somehow the conversation had circled back toward you. maybe it was yuna specifically that sharpened the feeling, the memory of the cafeteria flashing unpleasantly through your head all over again. maybe it was simply the fact that sohee had spent enough time occupying space inside your thoughts lately that now every glance around him felt loaded automatically whether it actually was or not.

you hated how much it bothered you.

hated the humiliating awareness that you were standing there trying to read meaning into body language and half-seen gestures like somebody genuinely unstable while sohee himself still looked maddeningly untouched by any of it. across the room yuna finally pulled back first, though her hand lingered briefly against the back of his neck another second longer before dropping away. sohee remained bent slightly toward her for half a heartbeat afterward before straightening again, eyes lowering briefly while she said one last thing that pulled the faintest twitch at the corner of his mouth.

then he nodded once. easy, casual, completely unaffected.

afterward he handed her the drink still hanging loose from his fingers before turning away from the group entirely and starting toward the darker hallway leading deeper into the house where the music dulled slightly beneath the walls.

something inside you moved before your brain fully caught up to it.

your grip tightened automatically around the cup in your hand before you tipped the rest of the vodka lemonade back in one long swallow, the sharp burn sliding cold and heavy down your throat while your pulse thudded thickly somewhere beneath your ribs. by the time you lowered the empty cup again, sohee had already nearly disappeared from sight beyond the edge of the hallway.

you barely thought at all before pushing yourself away from the wall and following after him.

the sound of your heels carried sharply through the hallway once you stepped fully away from the party, striking against the wooden floor in slow measured clicks that felt strangely loud compared to the muffled bass now vibrating distantly behind the walls. the farther you moved from the living room, the quieter everything became, though not truly silent. music still pulsed faintly beneath the floorboards while laughter drifted somewhere upstairs alongside the occasional slam of a bathroom door farther down the corridor. the dim lighting softened the hallway into warmer shadows compared to the chaos consuming the rest of the house, catching unevenly against discarded jackets, abandoned cups and the thin sheen of sweat still clinging faintly to your skin from hours spent inside the crowd.

ahead of you, sohee remained half turned away near the bathroom entrance with his attention lowered toward the phone in his hand, one broad shoulder resting briefly against the wall while his free hand moved absently along the back of his neck. from this close, every detail seemed clearer somehow without the constant movement of the crowd between you both. the black sleeveless shirt stretched cleanly across the width of his shoulders and upper back whenever he shifted his weight, blond strands hanging damp and dishevelled across his forehead while the silver chain resting against his throat caught faintly beneath the yellow glow from the lamp nearby.

the moment the sound of your footsteps fully registered you observed the faint tightening that moved subtly through his shoulders before his head lifted from the screen in his hand and his gaze sharpened instinctively toward the sound approaching behind him. the second his eyes landed on you standing there at the centre of the hallway, recognition settled visibly across his face and erased whatever loose absent ease had existed there moments earlier.

it happened fast enough to feel almost automatic, the line of his mouth flattening slightly while something colder slid neatly back into place behind his expression, familiar in a way that made heat rise low through your chest all over again because finally, after an entire night spent pretending otherwise, sohee looked at you exactly the way you had been expecting him to.

for a few seconds neither of you said anything.

the silence, neither of you looking away from each other long enough to acknowledge it. up close now, the tension that had spent weeks festering beneath every interaction finally felt stripped of all the buffers that usually softened it, no sungchan standing awkwardly between you trying to smooth things over, no crowded kitchen forcing either of you to swallow your reactions before they escalated too far.

there was only the two of you now. and sohee looked exactly the way you had expected him to the second he finally acknowledged your existence again.

the loose ease he had worn across the party had disappeared entirely. the harder version of him had slipped immediately back into place the moment recognition sunk in, visible now in the stillness sitting through his body and the line of his mouth while his gaze remained fixed on you with that same familiar restrained hostility you had spent weeks learning how to read.

your eyes dragged slowly across his face beneath the dim hallway lighting before finally meeting his stare properly again.

“why the fuck have you been talking about me to other people?”

sohee’s expression tightened immediately afterward, not with guilt or surprise but with something closer to pure irritation, like the accusation itself offended him. one side of his mouth pulled faintly while he looked at you for another second before scrunching his face slightly in visible disgust.

“you really think i have so little going on in my life that i spend my time talking about you?”

“well clearly you do,” you shot back quickly, “seeing as yuna’s suddenly repeating information i’m pretty sure didn’t magically fall out of the sky on its own.”

at the mention of yuna, something flickered faintly across his expression before he scoffed under his breath, the sound sharp and genuinely irritated enough that it echoed slightly in the quieter hallway. he shook his head once afterward while looking at you like you were something unpleasant stuck to the bottom of his shoe.

“so i spoke about you with one of my friends? not like i told her anything that wasn’t true.”

the words landed harder than they should have.

you stared at him for a second while then rolled your eyes slowly, the expression spreading deliberately across your face in a way that only seemed to sharpen the hostility already sitting between you both.

“you seriously don’t hear how fucking weird you sound?” you asked quietly, stepping closer now without properly realising it.

"seriously. what is your actual problem? because every time i turn around you've somehow made yourself part of something that never involved you in the first place."

“because unlike you, some people actually gave a shit about what happens to sungchan.”

“oh my god,” you laughed quietly. “you act like i ruined his life or something."

“but you did.”

the answer came so quickly it almost overlapped your own words.

for a second the hallway seemed to tighten around the both of you. whatever restraint had still been holding his composure together earlier was beginning to crack visibly around the edges, irritation bleeding steadily into something far rougher and more personal beneath the surface, like your complete inability to understand why he hated you this much genuinely disgusted him on some fundamental level.

“so stop standing here acting all shocked every time i make it obvious i don’t like you,” he continued, voice lower now but significantly less controlled than before.

“you don’t get to walk around acting all high and mighty after what you did.”

“for what though?” you shot back immediately, stepping closer now while heat climbed steadily through your chest.

“you don’t like me, okay, great. but you've spent months acting like a miserable prick every time i'm in the same room as you and i just don't get it.”

something snapped visibly across his expression then.

“because you fucking cheated on him,” he said, the words coming harsher this time, disbelief and anger twisting together beneath every syllable. “multiple times. then you walked away from him like he was the one to blame while he was already falling apart.”

your jaw tightened instantly.

“and now i’m supposed to believe you suddenly care about his wellbeing?” sohee continued before you could interrupt, eyes narrowing harder now while the muscles along his forearms flexed beneath crossed arms. “i’m supposed to believe you’re back in his life because of some newfound love for him or because you suddenly want a relationship again? give me a fucking break.”

the bitterness underneath his voice was ugly enough to scrape against your nerves.

"are you serious?" you laughed sharply. "that's what this is? you've spent months acting like i'm some sort of serial killer because i cheated on my ex-boyfriend?"

“you’re standing here bitching and crying over something he’s already moved on from,” you snapped back. “wish the same could be said about you.”

the reaction in him was immediate.

his jaw flexed hard enough for you to notice it beneath the dim hallway light while something genuinely furious darkened behind his expression for the first time since the conversation started.

“because he’s pathetic when it comes to you,” sohee said flatly. “i don’t know what sort of fucking hold you have over him, but it’s clearly clouding his judgement.”

“he’s pathetic because he’s not acting like some overgrown baby over cheating?” you scoffed. “oh my god, sohee, when the fuck are you gonna grow up?”

a humourless laugh escaped him at that, low and bitter enough that it immediately raised the temperature between you another degree.

“of course you’d say something like that,” he muttered, shaking his head slowly while looking down at you with open disgust now. “people like you always do.”

your eyebrows pulled together.

“people like me?”

“selfish people,” he said flatly. “people who leave a trail of damage behind them and then act confused when somebody points it out.”

"i guess being a bitch apparently becomes acceptable when you're pretty enough.”

“watch your mouth, sohee.”

“why?” he laughed bitterly, eyes narrowing now while the muscles in his jaw flexed visibly beneath flushed skin. “because hearing the truth makes you uncomfortable?”

“what makes me uncomfortable is you acting like some bitter fucking ex when none of this had anything to do with you in the first place.”

what had started as hostility had become something far uglier somewhere during the conversation, something raw enough that you could practically feel it tightening through the air around his body. because the second the words left your mouth, something in sohee’s expression changed completely.

the loss of control showed itself in smaller ways that somehow made it worse, the way his shoulders drew faintly tighter beneath the black fabric stretched across them, the way his jaw flexed once so hard you could see the muscle jump beneath flushed skin before he looked away briefly toward the floor like he physically needed a second to process what you had just said. when his eyes lifted back toward you again, whatever restraint had still been holding the conversation together earlier was visibly beginning to split apart around the edges.

“nothing to do with me?” he repeated quietly.

the look in his eyes made the hallway suddenly feel far too narrow.

you opened your mouth instinctively, already prepared to bite something cruel back at him before he could continue, but sohee spoke first, the words coming rougher now.

“you weren’t there,” he said, voice tightening unevenly around the sentence like the memory itself still sat somewhere lodged beneath his ribs.

“you weren’t there when he stopped eating properly for almost a month because every time somebody mentioned your name he looked like he was gonna be sick. you weren’t there when he couldn’t sleep. you weren’t there when he sat on the floor of our apartment crying over you like some fucking idiot because he couldn’t understand why he still wanted you back after everything you did to him.”

the force of it hollowed something briefly out of the air between you. the sharp immediate tightening in your chest at being spoken to like you were some uniquely evil person instead of somebody who had simply done something selfish and messy and human.

you hated the way sohee looked at you when he spoke, like he genuinely believed morality itself sat cleanly on one side of the room with him while you stood on the other dripping rot onto everything you touched.

your chin lifted slightly despite the pressure now building suffocatingly between you both.

“so what?” you answered flatly after a second. “it’s not like you’re the one i cheated on.”

“thank god i’m not sungchan,” he muttered bitterly, eyes dragging slowly across your face with open contempt now. “i’d rather die than let myself get played by the campus communal hole.”

the insult hit low and immediate as heat surged violently through your chest before thought could properly catch up to it. one second there was still space between your bodies, thick with hostility and sharp breathing and unresolved resentment, and the next your fist had twisted violently into the front of his tank top, bunching the black fabric tightly in your hand while you shoved him backward hard enough for his shoulders to collide against the wall behind him with a dull impact.

the movement startled him and you saw it immediately in the brief widening of his eyes before anger swallowed the reaction whole again.

suddenly you were impossibly close. close enough to feel the heat radiating from his body through the thin material crushed between your fingers, close enough to smell alcohol and smoke clinging heavily to his skin beneath the cleaner scent of his cologne, close enough to see the pulse beating sharply beneath the side of his throat while his breathing shifted unevenly.

“go on, use the word you really want to say” you hissed, voice rough now beneath the fury burning through your chest while you jerked him slightly forward off the wall again.

“say it. call me a slut, since you’re suddenly feeling so fucking brave.”

"sohee the great, slutshaming a woman, because of what? because i actually enjoy having sex?because i don't fake purity and virginity for vanilla guys like you?"

sohee stared down at you without blinking, chest rising harder now beneath your hand while tension spread visibly through every line of his body pinned against the wall behind him. the hatred was still there, obvious in the hard set of his jaw and the dark look fixed across his face, but underneath it now sat something far more dangerous than either of you had intended when this conversation first started, something hot and volatile crackling low through the tiny amount of space left separating your bodies.

still, when he finally spoke, the contempt remained intact.

“i don’t need to humour you or your manic ranting.”

“fuck you, sohee,” you spat back instantly, fingers twisting tighter into the front of his shirt until the fabric strained audibly between your fists.

“you know what i actually think? i think you're so busy worrying about everybody else's sex life because you've got absolutely nothing going on in your own.”

the disgust darkened immediately across his face.

“i think you're so miserable watching everybody around you actually enjoy themselves that you've convinced yourself it's some moral failing instead.”

the shove had locked you both into a space so narrow the rest of the party collapses into nothing but distant bass and smeared light. your fist remains twisted in the front of his shirt, knuckles pressed hard to the steady rise of his chest. his back is flat to the wall, shoulders rigid, and the heat trapped between your bodies thickens instantly, humid and suffocating, the summer air itself seeming to clot in the narrow gap that no longer exists. you can feel every shallow, uneven breath he takes, the way his ribs expand against your forearm, the faint tremor that runs through the muscle under your fingers. without meaning to, your fingers tighten, drawing him that last impossible fraction closer, and he shifts against the wall in a small, involuntary adjustment of his hips that registers before either of you can stop it.

the solid weight of his cock presses against your thigh where your skirt has ridden high. it feels immediately wrong, the blunt, insistent pressure dragging slowly along your skin, the dampness of it seeping through the denim in a slow, spreading patch that clings to you. your stomach drops and for one suspended heartbeat your mind goes perfectly still, the alcohol sharpening every detail until the contact feels almost violent in its clarity.

except the sensation refuses to belong to anything happening between you.

the anger is still there. the disgust too. sohee is still looking down at you with the same hostility that had been sitting across his face since the beginning of the conversation, his jaw tight, his breathing uneven from the force of the argument, every line of him still radiating the same contempt that had finally pushed you into shoving him against the wall in the first place. nothing about the moment has changed. nothing about him has changed.

yet the pressure remains.

your attention catches on it despite yourself, lingering there for a second longer than it should, your brain reaching automatically for explanations that make more sense than the one beginning to form at the edge of your thoughts. his phone, maybe. his keys. something caught awkwardly inside the pocket of his jeans. anything other than—

the realisation drags your focus lower before you can stop it. the outline is unmistakable now, stretched tight and heavy against the front of his jeans, the shape of him clearly defined where the fabric pulls. the weight of it is there, the slow, helpless pulse of it pressing into your thigh with every shallow breath he takes.

you’ve spent months making careless, cutting little jokes about him. about how someone so uptight and sexless probably didn’t have much to work with, months spent rolling your eyes whenever somebody mentioned one of his hookups, dismissing them as exaggerations or jokes about how someone like him probably fucked like he argued: stiff, joyless, and underwhelming. you’ve said it to his face in passing remarks, to sungchan when he wasn’t around, even to yourself when his cold stares got under your skin. you’ve been with enough men to know what’s average and what isn’t, and you’d written him off completely.

and now you’re staring, because this doesn’t make sense. the thick, heavy line of him is pressed right there against your thigh, so obviously, undeniably big that for a second your brain refuses to make the connection at all, the shape of it existing separately from the man standing in front of you, like the two things belong to entirely different people.

lee sohee. the same sohee who’s spent months looking at you like you were something filthy he had to tolerate for sungchan’s sake. the same sohee who acts like sex and desire are beneath him. the sheer size of it feels like a private joke the universe decided to play on you at the worst possible moment. your eyes stay there longer than they should, caught between disbelief and something sharper, something you don’t want to name yet.

your tongue drags slowly across your lower lip, breathing shallow and quick as a flush climbs your neck because you can feel how much he is leaking, the warm dampness spreading slowly against your thigh. your pussy gives one involuntary clench, a traitorous little pulse, your gaze lingering on the way another slow throb rolls through him in response, the way his cock twitches helplessly like it has already chosen for him.

sohee feels the exact moment you understand what you are feeling.

his entire frame locks, the muscle along his jaw jumping once, sharp and visible, horror and self-loathing moving openly across his expression as the reality of it settles over him. his eyes widen, then narrow with something raw and sick, his breathing turning ragged in the narrow space between your faces. for one endless second he simply stares at you, the realisation of what has just happened written plainly across his face.

his hands come up fast.

he shoves you back hard enough that you stumble, the sudden loss of his weight leaving your skin cold where it had been pressed. he is breathing like he has been struck, chest rising and falling in sharp, uneven drags, cheeks burning dark beneath the dim light. his eyes are wide with something that looks like panic wearing the thin mask of anger.

“stay the fuck away from my friend,” he mutters, voice low and cracked, already turning as though he cannot bear to look at you any longer.

you stand there with your pulse hammering between your legs, the memory of that insistent weight still burning against your thigh. by the time you finally push yourself away from the wall, the memory still hasn't loosened its grip on you, lingering stubbornly beneath your skin in the same way his words had earlier, except infinitely more irritating. because the last thing you wanted was another reason to think about lee sohee, and now he has given you one.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

✢ you first stumble into giselle’s world at a grimy house party where the bass throbs like a heartbeat in heat, the air a suffocating cocktail of sweat-soaked bodies and spilled beer pooling on sticky floors, your mind a chaotic storm of self-doubt. questioning the flutter in your chest when a girl’s laugh cuts through the noise, the way your eyes trace the swell of breasts under tight tops, life itself a murky fog you can’t navigate. and she materializes like a siren from the haze, pink hair glowing under flickering neon like forbidden candy floss, her gaze hooking into yours with a toxic allure that promises ruin wrapped in rapture, intoxicating you with a single smirk that drips venomous charm, pulling you under before you can gasp for air.

✢ she’s the catalyst that shatters your innocence, sliding a shot into your trembling hand with fingers that linger like a predator’s touch, the liquor burning down your throat like liquid fire, introducing you to the dizzying vertigo of drinking until the room spins in kaleidoscopic chaos. then it’s the joint pressed to your lips, acrid smoke invading your lungs like whispered sins, easing the knots of your confusion into a hazy euphoria.

✢ but it’s the sex that truly poisons you, her lips crashing against yours in a filthy, devouring kiss that tastes of mint and malice, her hands ripping away barriers to explore your untouched skin, fingers delving into your slick, virgin cunt with ruthless expertise, curling and thrusting until she wrenches your first real orgasm from you, a gushing torrent of wetness that soaks the sheets, leaving you shattered and hooked on her, every subsequent high paling in comparison to the intoxicating wreckage she leaves in your body and soul.

✢ unconsciously, you morph into her devoted shadow, a pathetic lost puppy panting at her heels through neon-lit streets and dimly lit bars, lapping up the crumbs of her attention in this unwilling situationship that’s more like a noose around your neck. the only way to taste her poison without dying outright, her free-spirited refusal of labels a cruel game that keeps you chained while she roams wild, dangling just enough affection to keep you addicted, your heart foolishly blooming like a flower in acid rain, wilting under the weight of her indifference.

✢ giselle’s toxicity bleeds into every corner of your life like ink in water. she rolls her eyes when you mention your friends or family who worry about you, calls them boring and controlling, slowly isolating you until her voice is the only one left in your head, then laughs that low, melodic laugh when you hesitate before swallowing another pill or skipping another class because “life’s too short to be a good girl, right?”. she watches the way your eyes dim with guilt and self-loathing, feeding off your growing isolation like it’s foreplay. every time you choose her destruction over your own safety, every time you text “i’m sorry i got upset” after she flaunts another girl right in front of you at a party, her arm slung casually around someone else’s waist while she blows you a mocking kiss across the room she just tilts her head, pleased, like this is exactly how it was always meant to go.

✢ even the small, everyday moments rot under her touch. she borrows money you can’t afford to lend and never pays it back, shows up high and needy at your doorstep when you have an exam the next day, then gets pouty and cold when you try to set a boundary, calling you selfish until you cave and stay up all night getting her off instead of studying. you slowly dismantle your own future while she keeps you close, distracted, occupied, noticing the way your anxiety builds but never soothing it, only pressing at it gently, deliberately, until it becomes something she can use, something that makes you easier to keep.

✢ the orgies she drags you into are her favorite way of breaking you further. dark, humid back rooms at underground parties where naked girls writhe in sweaty, moaning piles, the air thick with the scent of pussy and sweat and whatever pills she forced down your throat earlier. she makes you participate even when your stomach twists with shame, to prove you're hers, her hand fisted in your hair, pushing your face between a stranger’s slick thighs while another girl eats you out and giselle watches from the side, lazily fingering herself and cooing “good girl, see how happy you make mommy when you share?”. she watches more than she touches, eyes heavy-lidded, satisfied, like this is something she’s made of you and you hate yourself in the morning yet crawl back to her that night because the guilt somehow makes her affection feel earned, your nervous system learning to mistake self-destruction for devotion.

✢ she actively engineers situations that could destroy you just to watch how far you’ll go for her. like the time she convinces you to skip your final exams for a three-day bender in a stranger’s loft, where time blurs into bodies and noise and the dull, floating weight of whatever she’s put in your system. knowing full well you’re on academic probation and one more absence means expulsion, but mocks your rising panic the next morning when reality crashes back in—“god, you’re so dramatic, it’s just school, you’ll figure it out”. by the time the panic sets in, she’s already moved on, already looking for something else, leaving you to sit with the consequences she never has to carry.

✢ giselle moves through people with a kind of careless indulgence that borders on gluttony, a constant, insatiable hunger that never seems to quiet no matter how many bodies she feeds it with, never pausing long enough to let anything settle into meaning before she’s already reaching for something else, someone else, another mouth, another set of hands, another fleeting high to chase before the last one has even worn off. she doesn’t discriminate, doesn’t linger, doesn’t care to remember names or faces beyond the immediate heat of them, everything blurring together into a seamless cycle of touch and sensation that exists only to satisfy whatever restless urge pulses beneath her skin.

✢ she never hides it from you, never softens it into something more palatable, letting you see exactly what she is in the way she disappears at parties without a word, slipping into dimly lit rooms or crowded bathrooms with strangers whose names you never catch, only to return later like nothing happened, lips swollen and gloss smeared, the faint scent of someone else still clinging to her skin beneath the sweetness of her perfume, her pink hair mussed just enough to make it obvious if you’re paying attention, which you always are. sometimes you catch glimpses you weren’t meant to, the sharp press of her against someone in a shadowed corner, the way her head tips back in quiet pleasure while unfamiliar hands roam her body, the low murmur of her voice as she takes exactly what she wants without hesitation, without shame, without ever once looking like she might regret it later.

✢ she shows up at your door past 2am, body still humming with the afterglow of wherever she’s been, carrying it with her like a second skin, the air around her thick with the sweet, artificial haze of her vape tangled with the sharp snap of mint that doesn’t quite cover what lingers beneath it. something heavier, more intimate, clinging to the curve of her mouth and the slow drag of her fingers as she lifts her hand to knock, and it hits you all at once the second you open the door, settles low in your chest in a way that feels almost physical, almost suffocating, because you know exactly what it is and where it’s come from. fresh hickeys bloom across her neck like badges of betrayal, dark and swollen from teeth and lips that weren’t yours. but she brushes your hair back, purring “hey, pretty girl”, like nothing about her is out of place, like she hasn’t just walked in carrying the remnants of someone else all over her skin. her hands find you easily, like they’ve learned you too well, settling at your waist before sliding between your thighs to find you already wet for her, responding to her like it always does, like it’s been waiting for this exact moment, like it doesn’t remember how to do anything else. even as you feel it, even as you recognise it, the way she pulls you in, the way she touches you like she’s claiming something that was never hers to begin with, you don’t stop her, don’t push her away, don’t do anything except let yourself be drawn back into her orbit, knowing exactly where she’s been, knowing exactly what she’s done, and still wanting her anyway in a way that feels less like desire and more like something you’ve already lost control over.

✢ you plummet into love with her in a way that feels less like falling and more like surrender. a slow, deliberate descent into something you already know you won’t survive, wanting her in a way that borders on self-destruction, wishing with a kind of quiet desperation that she would choose you, that she would stay, that she would narrow her world down to just you. but she never does, never will, her nature too restless, too untamed to belong to anything for long, slipping through your fingers every time you try to hold her there. you hate sharing her, hate the way her name lights up your chest only to sink just as quickly when you remember it isn’t yours alone, the jealousy settling deep and heavy inside you, something slow and festering that you can’t ignore, can’t outrun. not when she talks so casually about where she’s been, who she’s touched. not when her phone buzzes beside you with messages she doesn’t bother to hide, each one a quiet reminder of how little you actually have. she notices it every time, always does, catching the shift in your expression before you can hide it, that small, betraying flicker that gives you away, and she only laughs, soft and amused, like your jealousy is something endearing rather than something that’s slowly eating you alive, her hand already finding you, curling around the back of your neck with an ease that feels instinctive, pulling you closer before you can think to resist, before you can remember why you should. she calls you hers in that same low, honeyed tone, “my sweet girl,” like it’s something real, something you can trust, and you let yourself believe it for just long enough to matter, just long enough for it to undo you, her mouth finding yours, lips sealing over yours in a deep, filthy kiss, french kissing you with fervor that erases everything else.

✢ she weaponizes your lowest moments like they belong to her, like they’re something she’s earned the right to keep, catching you mid-panic attack after another weekend where she disappears without explanation, your hands trembling uncontrollably, your breath coming in shallow, uneven pulls, your voice cracking around words you can’t even finish. instead of reaching for you, instead of grounding you, she just watches, quiet and observant for a beat too long, then records it, preserving every fractured second of you coming apart like it’s something worth revisiting, something she can return to later. and she does, showing it off so casually it feels unreal, your own voice playing back in the background while you sit there, small and exposed, the sound of yourself unraveling filling the space as she tilts her head and smiles, soft and almost fond, cooing about how cute you look when you fall apart for her, like your distress is something delicate, something she gets to admire.

✢ when something in you finally resists, finally pushes just enough to reach for distance, for space, for anything that might feel like control, she intercepts it without effort, taking your phone from your hands, undoing whatever small act of defiance you manage before it can settle into something real, before you can follow through, and somehow draws you back in with that same quiet, practiced pull that always works on you and fucking you so hard the shame dulls into another orgasm.

✢ financially she bleeds you slowly and shamelessly, always "forgetting" her wallet when you hit the campus bar or the late-night food truck, making you spot her for ubers after she stays out all night with other girls, or asking you to buy her weed because "you're so much better at talking to the plug than i am, baby," until your part-time dining-hall job money disappears faster than you can earn it and the guilt of saying no becomes heavier than the guilt of enabling her endless partying, her smile so sweet when she thanks you that you almost forget she's the one who convinced you this is what college love looks like.

✢ giselle’s seduction is a weapon, something deliberate in the way she looks at you, in the slow, knowing curve of her mouth as she undresses you piece by piece, her pink hair falling around her face like something deceptively soft, framing eyes that gleam with quiet, almost cruel satisfaction as she takes her time, her body warm and close and impossible to ignore, the soft weight of her plump tits brushing against you in a way that feels intentional, like she knows exactly what it does to you, letting the tension build until it sits heavy in your chest, until your breathing changes, until your body is already responding before she’s even truly started. when she finally does it’s unhurried, precise, her hands moving with a confidence that feels practiced, like she already knows exactly how you’ll respond, exactly how far she can push before you fall apart, fingers plunging into your drenched pussy with squelching obscenity, three digits stretching you wide, curling viciously against your g-spot while her thumb assaults your clit in brutal circles that has you squirting in hot, messy arcs, soaking her hand and the bed in your filthy release before lapping you up like nectar leaving you shaking, breathless, unable to do anything but feel, and she takes it in, every reaction, every sound, every involuntary movement. something in her sharpens with quiet satisfaction as she keeps you there just a little longer, enough to remind you that all of it happens because she allows it to, because she wants it to, because she’s the one holding you together and pulling you apart in the same breath. her control is woven so seamlessly into the pleasure that you stop trying to separate the two, stop questioning it altogether, until all that’s left is her and the way she makes you feel, and the quiet, dangerous understanding that you would let her do it again without hesitation.

✢ the toys she curates for you are instruments of exquisite torture. the vibrating dildo she rams into you, the buzz humming through your core as she fucks you hard and deep. the strap-on harnessed to her hips, thick and veined, slicked with your spit as she forces it down your throat first, gagging you until drool cascades, then pounding you with savage thrusts, wet slaps of skin on skin while she forces your face into the mattress and whispers how much she loves watching you break, how pretty you look when you’re crying and cumming at the same time, drinking it in, slow and satisfied every time you squirt in messy, humiliating arcs because she made you do it, because you’re hers to ruin.

✢ giselle’s favorite games are the ones she plays in plain sight, where no one else is looking closely enough to notice, where everything she does to you can be disguised as something casual, something harmless. her hand slipping beneath the table at dinner like it belongs there, pushing past fabric with quiet insistence while she keeps talking, smiling, laughing like nothing is happening at all. and you’re forced to sit there and take it, body betraying you in small, uncontrollable ways tension coiling tighter with every subtle movement of her fingers, every shift that threatens to pull a sound from you that you have to swallow down, the clink of cutlery and low conversation barely masking the squelch. she watches you out of the corner of her eye, always aware, always paying attention, the faintest smirk pulling at her mouth when you falter, when your composure slips just enough to satisfy her, and when she finally withdraws her hand it’s not to stop but to remind you, pressing something sweet to your lips like a reward, like a test, her gaze holding yours as she waits to see if you’ll take it, if you’ll follow through, if you’ll prove once again how easily she can make you comply.

✢ she carries that same quiet control into every space she moves through, especially the crowded, dimly lit parties she thrives in, where the air is thick and the music loud enough to blur everything at the edges. where she can stay across the room and still have you exactly where she wants you, controlling you without ever needing to touch you, remote vibrator nestled deep in your fluttering pussy, her attention flicking back to you every so often just to check, just to see how close you are to breaking, how much more you can take before it becomes too much. she drags it out, lets it build slowly, deliberately, until your body feels like it no longer belongs to you, ramping it up mid-conversation to watch you squirm, thighs slick with arousal dripping down your legs, fighting the orgasm that builds in humiliating waves. her gaze across the room darkening as she edges you to the brink, before she pulls you away from everything else, into somewhere darker, more private, where she can finish what she started without interruption, slamming you against the sink to finger-fuck you mercilessly, palm grinding your clit while her tongue invades your mouth, swallowing your screams.

✢ through every calculated discard and every reckless detour, every dollar she drains and every boundary she laughs off like it was never meant to hold, giselle remains constant in the most destructive way. a pink-haired storm that erodes you slowly, wearing down the edges of your life until there’s nothing left that exists untouched by her, until the girl you used to be feels distant and unfamiliar, like someone you only half remember, someone who wouldn’t recognise what you’ve become. and what’s left in her place is something smaller, something softer in all the wrong ways, trembling and self-destructive and entirely shaped by the gravity of her, still crawling back every time despite everything she takes, everything she breaks. because somewhere along the way she taught you how to mistake devastation for devotion, how to see the way she ruins you as something beautiful and worth holding onto, until her particular brand of love, careless and consuming and just shy of cruel, becomes the only thing that feels real enough to stay for, the only thing that feels worth surviving at all—

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

the silence that follows anton’s question is a fragile veil, drawn taut over the humid chaos of the room, its threads woven from the faint, erratic beeps of the game ending on sohee’s monitor and the ragged cadence of your own breathing, each inhale a shallow rasp that scrapes against your raw throat like sandpaper on silk. the immediate aftermath clings to you like a second skin, heavy and humid, the air in sohee’s room thick with the sharp, musky tang of release and sweat.

your body slumps against his chest, boneless and trembling, the aftershocks rippling through you in faint, involuntary twitches, your walls fluttering weakly, the persistent throb low in your belly, raw and oversensitive from the relentless stretch. slick still leaks from you in slow, cooling trails, pooling on the ruined leather chair beneath you in dark, spreading stains that soak through to the foam, the wet squelch of it shifting under your weight a humiliating reminder of how completely he’s wrecked you tonight, your thighs quivering with exhaustion, muscles jumping sporadically as if protesting the abuse.

overstimulation lingers like a bruise you can’t shake, every nerve ending lit up and protesting even the slightest brush of air against your flushed skin, your clit pulsing faintly with a dull, insistent ache that shame only sharpens into something sharper, more demanding, the compulsion stirring faintly beneath the fatigue despite your mind screaming for respite. dread coils in your chest alongside it, cold and serpentine, wrapping around the lingering heat until they blur, a morally ambiguous haze where guilt wars with the biological urge that drove you here, the emotional love for anton a gentle tether fraying under the weight of your physical betrayal.

sohee’s smirk is a tangible thing, a slow unfurling you sense in the way his chest vibrates against your back, his breath ghosting hot and teasing over the shell of your ear, carrying the faint, acrid tang of his sweat and the artificial sweetness of whatever gum he’s been chewing between matches. he doesn’t withdraw immediately, instead indulging in a few more shallow thrusts, languid rolls of his hips that drag the blunt head of his cock through your oversensitive folds, each glide a spark against raw nerves that sends tremors rippling outward from your core, your clit pulsing faintly against the coarse friction of his pubic hair.

the wet, obscene sounds fill the space, soft squelches that echo in your ears like whispers of your own depravity, and you feel every inch of him, the vein along his shaft throbbing in time with your erratic pulse, a reminder of how deeply he’s embedded, how completely he’s claimed the parts of you that anton’s gentleness could never reach.

“you’re finally getting what you want,” he murmurs, his voice a low, velvet rumble that vibrates through your ear canal, tickling the fine hairs there and sending involuntary shivers cascading down your neck, raising goosebumps in their wake.

his hand, still splayed possessively over your lower stomach, presses firmer, forcing you to confront the obscene bulge where he fills you, a firm ridge beneath your skin that shifts with each breath, a living testament to your addiction, the physical need that eclipses emotional love in these stolen moments, leaving guilt to fester like a wound that never heals.

you’re too spent to muster more than a faint, breathless hum, your body a boneless weight slumped against him, limbs heavy as lead, muscles aching from the earlier convulsions, your mind adrift in the foggy aftermath where thoughts fragment into sensations. the dull throb between your legs, the sticky residue coating your inner thighs, the faint metallic taste of blood where you’ve bitten your lip raw. exhaustion pulls at you like gravity, but beneath it, the compulsion stirs faintly, a whisper of that persistent arousal syndrome that haunts your waking hours, implying through bodily twitches what your rational mind denies.

he chuckles then, a dark, resonant sound that rumbles through his chest into yours, stirring the embers of desire despite your fatigue, his amusement a cruel balm over the shame that pricks at your skin like needles. 

“greedy girl finally gets to be stuffed by two dicks in one night. i bet you’re enjoying this.”

you shake your head no, the motion violent and desperate, your tangled hair whipping across your face in wild strands that stick to your damp cheeks. a vehement denial rooted in the shreds of loyalty clinging to your heart, the emotional tether to anton, a soft, patient love built on whispered promises and gentle touches, fraying under the onslaught of this physical betrayal. where dominance eclipses gentleness, and shame amplifies arousal into something voracious. 

but your body, ever the traitor, contradicts you: a deep, involuntary clench of your walls around his cock, a subtle pulse that milks him unconsciously, revealing the subconscious thrill anticipating anton’s arrival, that forbidden corner where desire thrives on exposure and validation, where the fear of consequences only heightens the biological impulse, turning morality into a blurred shadow.

sohee senses it immediately, his smirk sharpening into something predatory, and with one final, lazy grind that grinds his hips against yours, he pulls out slowly, the drag of his cock leaving you excruciatingly empty, your cunt fluttering weakly around the void. slick gushes in a warm rush that trickles down your thighs, pooling on the chair in copious amounts, the scent rising sharp and intimate, a humiliating confession etched in fluid. he eases you down onto the gaming chair with a casual indifference, your body slumping into the worn leather, thighs quivering uncontrollably as the cum leaks out in slow, viscous strands, mingling with sweat to create a slick film that cools against your skin, raising chills that dance up your spine. 

your makeup is a ruined canvas, mascara smudged into dark halos under your eyes, lipstick smeared across your chin like a hasty afterthought, your dress hiked up to your waist, exposing the flushed, marked skin of your core. your hair was a messy tangle from sohee’s habitual grip, fistfuls pulled taut during thrusts that arched your back and tore cries from your throat, a thin sheen of sweat glazing your body, catching the light in a deceptive glow that masks the wreckage beneath.

he saunters from the room without a backward glance, his footsteps a lazy echo down the hallway toward the kitchen, leaving you alone in the oppressive gloom. the mechanical hum of the computer fans fills the silence, a steady drone that amplifies the quiet, making it thicker, more oppressive, your heartbeat pounding in your ears like a drum signaling an impending storm, each thump echoing the dread building in your chest.

fear surges then, coiling around your ribs and squeezing until your breaths come short and labored, triggered by the echo of anton’s tone through the headset. that unfamiliar steel, a quiet dominance laced with hurt, a far cry from the soft-spoken affection you’re accustomed to, the shift unnerving in its intensity, making your skin prickle with anticipation that’s equal parts dread and unwelcome thrill. you’ve never heard him wield his voice like that, a blade honed by betrayal, and now your mind races through scenarios.

will he come, storming through the door with rage in his eyes, or won’t he, leaving you to stew in this limbo of guilt and need? 

you rehearse apologies in the fractured mirror of your thoughts:

it was a mistake, i’m so sorry, i love you, anton, please believe me.

clinging to a veneer of innocence, the emotional intimacy you share with him a lifeline amid the storm, yet the words ring hollow even in your head, undermined by the compulsion that drives you here night after night. the unfulfilled ache that anton’s gentleness can’t quench, his tender laps and laced fingers a soft rain against the wildfire of your needs. guilt twists deeper, a vine choking the breath from your lungs, yet it only sharpens the sensory haze.

 you try to steady yourself, drawing deep breaths that catch on the edges of panic, convincing your trembling limbs that freshening up is the path to salvation, that you can wash away the evidence with soap and water, smooth the tangles from your hair, tug the dress down over your marked skin, pretend this was a fleeting nightmare, a deviation from the love that defines you.

but in this suspended moment, a desperate wish flickers for sohee to help, to shed his smug detachment and offer some semblance of support, a hand to steady you or a word to ease the knot in your stomach, as he reenters the room with a glass of water clutched in his fist, condensation beading on the surface like tiny accusations. of course nothing for you, his eyes alight with that cruel amusement as he takes in your pathetic struggle—legs wobbling like a newborn fawn’s as you push up from the chair, hands gripping the armrests for leverage, the leather slick and unforgiving under your palms, sending you slipping back once, twice, before you find precarious balance. 

he chuckles, the sound low and mocking, slicing through the tension like a serrated edge, cooing in faux sympathy as he reaches out to pat your head, fingers tangling briefly in the messy strands with a condescending gentleness that makes your skin crawl and your core clench in forbidden response.

“fucked you so dumb you can’t even walk now?” his voice drips with venomous delight, the words a barbed hook that lodges in your self-esteem, pulling at the threads until they unravel, shame flooding hot and prickling across your chest, yet inexplicably stirring the embers of arousal, your nipples peaking against the fabric as if the degradation is just another form of foreplay.

“can’t wait to see what your boyfriend thinks when he sees i’ve got you walking like bambi. maybe that will get him to grow some balls and fuck you like a real man. you’re welcome by the way.”

the taunt lands like a slap, your stomach twisting in a vise of dread and unwelcome heat, the moral conflict sharpening. how can you feign normalcy when your legs quiver like this, weak and unsteady, the evidence of your ruin leaking in slow trails down your skin, cooling to a sticky reminder that clings like guilt itself? sohee’s casual cruelty only amplifies the panic, his laughter a dark melody that echoes in your ears, heightening the sensory overload until the room feels too small, the air too thick, the anticipation of anton’s arrival a gathering storm that presses down on your chest, heavy and inescapable.

eventually, his amusement ebbs, fading into a territorial glint as he scoops you up with effortless strength, hiking you over his shoulder despite your feeble protests consisting of weak slaps against his back that lack conviction, your voice a muffled whine swallowed by the fabric of his shirt. the world inverting in a dizzying spin, the floor receding as he carries you to the bathroom like a trophy claimed in battle, the jostle of each step sending jolts through your core, rekindling the ache with every bounce. 

he sets you down on the counter, the cool marble a shocking contrast against your heated skin, biting into your thighs like ice on fire,  before putting you down and turning you to face the mirror with firm hands, one clamping onto your head to force your gaze forward, the other resting possessively on your hip, his body a cage behind yours, solid and unyielding.

“you see that? see how much of a slut you are? how ruined you got by your boyfriend’s best friend’s cock?”

the reflection assaults you, a vivid portrait of devastation under the harsh fluorescent light. eyes glassy with a haze of tears and lingering subspace, mascara tracked in dark rivers down your cheeks like warpaint from a lost battle, lips swollen and bruised from bites and kisses, parted on shallow breaths that fog the glass faintly, neck a canvas of blooming hickeys, purple and red like violent blossoms pressed into your skin, the dress a wrinkled ruin clinging to your sweat-slick curves, hem rucked up to expose the flushed, marked expanse of your thighs and core. 

shame crashes over you in waves, hot and suffocating, your body trembling under his grip as emotional realism pierces through. the love for anton a tender bruise in your chest, clashing with the raw fulfillment sohee provides.

“i did that to you. i made you this way.”

you shake your head, a desperate bid to deny the truth staring back, trying to avert your eyes from the wreckage, but he won’t allow it, his body pressing closer, caging you against the counter, his erection rubbing insistently against your ass through the thin barrier of his sweatpants, a hard, insistent reminder of the power he wields, the dynamic that thrills and terrifies in equal measure. he snakes two fingers around to your pussy, the touch deliberate and invasive, rubbing two slow, deliberate circles around your clit that ignite your oversensitive nerves like fireworks in a storm, the sensation a lightning bolt through your fried synapses, your head snapping back against his shoulder with a shattered moan, pussy twitching and clenching in helpless spasms, fresh slick coating his digits in a warm glaze despite the exhaustion dragging at your limbs like chains.

he withdraws them leisurely, holding them up to your lips in the mirror’s reflection, glistening with your release, the scent sharp and intimate rising to mingle with the faint bleach tang of the bathroom, a heady cocktail that makes your head spin.

“open up. can’t have your boyfriend seeing you look so filthy.”

he taps your lips with the soiled fingers, insistent yet patient, your eyes hazy and unfocused as you comply, parting your mouth with a soft, obedient sigh, sucking on them with a mindless rhythm born from the compulsion, the taste of yourself—salty, tangy, laced with his skin—a forbidden elixir that swirls on your tongue. 

he coos in your ear, the words a degrading caress, “good slut”, that sends shivers racing down your spine, your core clenching around nothing, the praise a twisted validation that heightens the moral ambiguity, making desire feel involuntary, complicated by the emotional love waiting just beyond the door.

he lets you suck for a lingering while, the act almost meditative, the suckle of your lips around his fingers a rhythmic pull that echoes the earlier thrusts, before pulling them away with a wet pop, only to dip them back into your folds for more, repeating the cycle in a slow, torturous loop that imprints the degradation deeper, each iteration a reminder of your surrender. 

it’s so wrong, this suspended intimacy with anton en route, the knowledge a weight in your chest that should spur you to stop, to scramble for words of apology, to reclaim some shred of agency, yet here you are, lost in the sensory vortex, a mix of your cum and his skin swirling on your tongue like a sacrament of sin, the flavor embedding itself in your memory.

“good fucking girl. always listening to instructions.”

the spell shatters with the banging on the door, loud but measured, not frantic. a deliberate summons that reverberates through the apartment like thunder in a bottle, freezing your blood in your veins as panic surges, body locking rigid, heart slamming against your ribs in wild, erratic bursts that drown out everything else. 

you know it’s him, the certainty a cold blade twisting in your gut, the anticipation boiling over into terror that makes your hands shake uncontrollably.

sohee’s smugness peaks, a competitive gleam in his eyes as he presses a few lingering kisses to your neck, lips grazing the fresh hickeys where they bloom like dark secrets under your skin, the touch sending unwelcome sparks racing down your spine, rekindling the ache even as panic claws at your throat. then he saunters to the door, unhurried, his posture a lazy swagger that speaks of entertainment found in chaos.

your fingers fumble with tissues to wipe at the makeup smudges, dabbing frantically at the leftover cum streaking your thighs, flattening your hair in hasty pats that do little to tame the chaos, pulling down your dress with trembling tugs that snag on damp skin. but fear renders you clumsy, the toilet roll tumbling from the holder with a clatter that echoes too loudly, the soap bar slipping from your grasp to skitter across the tile like a fleeing animal, all because your heart pounds in your chest like a war drum, hands quaking with adrenaline, legs wobbly not just from the overstimulation but from the dread heightening every sense. the cool tile under your feet a grounding chill, the fluorescent light buzzing overhead like an accusatory hum, the air thick with the mingled scents of sex and cleanser, turning the bathroom into a confessional you can’t escape.

you stagger from the bathroom into the bedroom on unsteady legs, perching on the edge of sohee’s bed where the sheets still bear the imprint of your body, damp and rumpled, clinging to your thighs like a guilty embrace.

the temperature plunges the instant anton’s presence registers beyond the threshold, a metaphorical frost that seeps through the walls, raising goosebumps along your arms and making you shiver as if winter has invaded the room. the quiet whir of sohee’s gaming system remains a persistent undertone that amplifies your labored breaths, each one a visible puff in the chilled air, chest heaving with the effort to contain the storm within. 

you can’t meet his eyes at first, gaze fixed on the floor where shadows pool like spilled ink, but you glimpse the fury in his stance. it’s the first time you’ve seen him unraveled like this, the soft contours of his face hardened into sharp lines, jaw clenched so tight the muscle ticks visibly, eyes cold as glacial depths, brows furrowed in a thunderous scowl that darkens his expression, transforming the boy who would cradle you in sleep into a figure of restrained rage.

he halts abruptly, his gaze raking over you in a searing, methodical sweep that feels like flames licking at your skin as he approaches you: the dried tears crystalline on your cheeks like fragile salt trails, the flushed hue of your skin glowing with a feverish sheen under the dim light, rosy lips swollen and parted on gasps that betray your turmoil. your heels still strapped to your feet, scuffed from frantic scrambles across the floor, your dress barely concealing your body, clinging to every curve with the tenacity of a lover’s grasp, slick with sweat and release that darkens the fabric in telltale patches. 

he scoffs, the sound low and bitter, slicing through the silence like a whip crack, his head shaking in slow disbelief, as if the sight of you is a punch to the gut, expected yet gut-wrenching, a visual echo of the betrayal broadcast moments ago.

his hand darts out, fingers clamping around your chin with a bruising force that draws a hiss from your lips, pain blooming sharp and immediate across your jaw, radiating outward like ripples in disturbed water, his grip unyielding, thumb digging into the soft underside until fresh tears well up, blurring the room into a watery haze. terror grips you for the first time, genuine and bone-deep, the affectionate boy evaporated into this cold, furious stranger whose touch is a brand, possessive and punishing, arousal intertwined with reclamation in a way that makes your core throb despite the fear.

he leans in close, studying the minutiae of your ruin up close: the mascara etched into purplish bruises under your eyes, the bite marks flowering on your neck like illicit tattoos, lips puffy from sohee’s demanding kisses, your dress now a stained relic, heels bearing the scuffs of desperation. the air between you thickens with his scent, clean cologne undercut by the faint salt of anger-induced sweat, a stark contrast to the raw musk clinging to you, the proximity amplifying the emotional heavy dominance radiating from him, pressing down like a storm cloud.

“seeing as you came wearing the dress i bought you last week,” he says, his voice a steady murmur, calm on the surface but laced with venom that seeps into your veins, raising goosebumps along your arms as the words wrap around you like chains, “this wasn’t some mistake. you got all pretty in something i paid for… to come here and get whored out?”

his tongue prods the inside of his cheek, a tic of restrained fury, jaw clenching tighter, the seriousness in his eyes a brewing tempest that accelerates your heart to a frantic gallop, fear and twisted anticipation blending until you can taste them on your tongue.

“i’m s—” you begin, the apology a tremulous whisper, born from the guilt that gnaws at your insides like a starving beast.

“don’t you dare fucking apologise,” he interrupts, thumb pressing harder into your jaw until the pain sharpens your vision, tears spilling hot and silent down your cheeks. 

“you let him fuck you for months behind my back and think sorry fixes it?”

his gaze shifts to sohee, venom pure and undiluted flashing in the cold blue, the triangular tension igniting like a spark on dry tinder, silent accusations hanging heavy as both men stake their claims over your trembling form.

“what kind of friend are you?”

sohee shrugs against the wall, arms crossed in casual defiance, his smirk a widening crease that gleams with amusement, his energy provocative, taunting, detached from morality as he revels in the power play, viewing anton’s intrusion as prime entertainment, a chance to assert his psychological edge.

“not my fault your girlfriend came crying to me every week, begging for my cock. she needed it. i just gave her what you couldn’t.”

anton’s hold on your chin constricts for a split second, a pulse of rage that radiates through his fingers, then releases as he pivots to face sohee fully, his voice plummeting to an icy timbre that chills the room further.

“shut the fuck up.”

sohee’s smirk holds firm, eyes alight with glee at anton’s unraveling, the once-sweet friend now a vortex of betrayal and fury, the competition a delicious undercurrent that sharpens his territorial instincts.

anton turns back to you, his eyes scouring your quaking body once more, a dark resolve crystallizing in their depths, the hurt morphing into a fierce need to reclaim, to demonstrate his capability through controlled dominance. the betrayal simmers in anton’s veins like poison, a toxic brew of hurt and rage that twists his usual tenderness into something unrecognizable, a shadow self he’s always kept leashed during your intimate moments, the soft kisses, the careful caresses, the whispered i love yous that wrapped your encounters in gentle care. but you’ve pushed him beyond that now, shattered the illusion with your deceit, and he no longer cares about leading with love; the pain demands punishment, a rough, physical reckoning that channels his anger into every brutal motion.

“get on the bed,” he commands, voice hushed yet authoritative, the prelude to a tempest. “on all fours.”

you comply in a scramble, legs faltering beneath you, crawling onto the mattress with knees that buckle like brittle twigs, the bed yielding under your weight, sheets damp and cool against your palms, clinging to your skin as you assume the position. ass elevated, face buried in the fabric, the vulnerability a exposed nerve that thrums with fear and expectancy, shame intensifying the arousal until your clit pulses faintly, body yielding involuntarily to his command. 

anton advances, the atmosphere thickening with his aura, hands coarse as they seize your hips, maneuvering you into the position he wants with a vigor that elicits a gasp, the mattress creaking under his knees as he aligns behind you. now grabbing your hips with a harshness that digs his fingers into your flesh, nails biting deep enough to draw crescent moons of blood to the surface, the sting a sharp prelude that makes you gasp, your body already oversensitive from sohee’s earlier ravages, nerves frayed and screaming.

for the first time in your shared history, anton doesn't do foreplay. no tender traces along your folds, no murmured endearments against your nape; your arousal from sohee’s providing more than enough lubrication, a glistening invitation. he’s learned the hard way that none of that was what you craved, not the gentle buildup but the raw force, the manhandling that treats you like something to be used, broken, remade in the fire of his fury. 

he slams into you in one savage stroke, his longer cock, sleeker than sohee’s thickness but reaching depths that nudge your cervix with punishing accuracy, forcing a choked cry from your throat as he bottoms out, the stretch a burning invasion that steals your breath, your walls clenching in futile protest around the intrusion, slick from before but not enough to dull the edge of pain that blooms into a dark, addictive pleasure.

the thrusts come fast and relentless, his swimmer’s stamina turning him into an unyielding machine, hips snapping forward with a speed and power that jolts the bedframe, the headboard thumping against the wall in a rhythmic accusation that echoes through the room, the creak of wood straining under the force mingling with the wet squelch of your juices as he drives in, each plunge forcing out a fresh gush of slick that coats his shaft and drips down your thighs in warm, sticky trails.

"o-oh… g-god…"

your body lurches ahead with each viscous impact, breasts spilling fully from your dress in heavy bounces that scrape your nipples against the damp sheets, the friction a torturous tease amid the chaos, the noises you make high-pitched whimpers that fracture into sharp gasps, air forced from your lungs in ragged bursts, anton’s low groans rumbling from his chest like thunder, raw and animalistic, a sound you’ve never heard from him before, laced with the grit of his anger.

the sleek sounds from sohee’s direction add to the symphony. the faint, wet glide of his hand stroking his cock in lazy pulls, the soft schlick of skin on skin as he watches, his breaths coming in measured huffs, amusement coloring his voice in occasional low chuckles that cut through the haze, fueling anton’s rage further. 

the build-up is brutal, a slow-growing pressure in your lower stomach that starts as a faint tightness, coiling tighter with every deep thrust, the length of him hitting so deep it feels like he’s pressing against your insides from the wrong side. the sensation grows and grows, a relentless tide that makes your thighs quiver, muscles tensing in anticipation, your moans turning longer, more drawn-out as the pleasure mounts, half pulling you closer to him with desperate rolls of your hips, half trying to push away as the intensity borders on too much, tears pricking your eyes from the overwhelming fullness.

you never imagined this transformation, the soft boy you knew morphing into a storm of fury, his usual tenderness evaporated into something raw and punishing, the speed of his thrusts verging on brutality, the merciless rhythm battering your core like waves crashing against jagged rock, body shuddering against the tangled sheets as you reach a hand back toward his stomach, fingers trembling in a futile plea to slow the pace.

he catches your wrist in an instant, using his strength to twist your arm behind you, his other hand knotting in your hair, pulling until your scalp burns like fire under his grip, neck craned back, ear pressed to his mouth as he growls, his breath hot and ragged against your skin, words laced with pain and command that send a fresh flood slickening around him.

“move that fucking hand. you want to act like a slut, you’ll get fucked like one.”

“a-an-anton fuck,” you babble, tears blurring your vision, words spilling in shattered fragments, your voice a quivering sob that only spurs him on.

you try again to get him to slow down, the words bubbling up in a desperate whine, “p-please, too-too fast”, used to his gentleness, the way he’d always ease you into it with tender kisses and careful touches, but all he sees in his mind’s eye are flashes of sohee fucking you. 

the images sear like brands on his retinas, fueling the anger until it boils over, his thrusts turning sharper, deeper, hips snapping forward with a punishing rhythm that rattles the bedframe harder, the creak turning into a groan of protest from the wood. your head spins, thoughts fragmenting into sensation alone, fucked so good you can’t form words, just releases of air in high-pitched whimpers and sharp gasps that fill the room like broken music, your cunt clenching around him in helpless spasms, the squelching louder now, obscene and wet as slick gushes with every withdrawal, coating your thighs and the sheets in a messy sheen that catches the rgb lights in glistening reflections.

anton’s voice breaks through the haze, degrading you for the first time, grit roughening the usually soft timbre, turning it into something gravelly and mean that sends a forbidden thrill racing between your legs. 

“so fucking wet,” he growls, one hand leaving your hip to slap your ass with a crack that echoes, the sting blooming hot and immediate, making you arch despite yourself, a sharp gasp tearing from your throat as the pain twists into pleasure. 

“sohee fucked you good, didn’t he? bet you were a good little whore for him.”

you can’t answer, can’t do anything but whine, the words dissolving on your tongue as another thrust punches the air from your lungs, tears spilling over as shame and arousal entwine, your body betraying you with fresh slick that eases his brutal pace. the pressure in your lower stomach builds slowly, a coiling tension that grows with every deep plunge, starting as a faint warmth and swelling into a heavy fullness that makes your breaths come shorter, your moans turning into drawn-out pleas as it mounts higher, your thighs quivering harder, muscles tensing and releasing in frantic waves.

"sh-shit… deep…"

he drags you up roughly then, one arm banding around your waist like iron, pulling you back until your spine is flush against his chest, the heat of him searing through your dress, his breath hot and ragged against your ear, the squelch of your juices louder in this position, each thrust forcing out a wet gush that trickles down his balls in warm streams. 

“look at sohee,” he snarls, fingers tangling in your hair to yank your head toward the chair, forcing your gaze to meet sohee’s amused eyes, the vulnerability a exposed wire sparking fear and desire in equal measure, his strokes on his cock turning slower, more deliberate, the sleek sound of precum slicking his length a taunting accompaniment. 

“tell him how much of a slut you are.”

you try, but the words fracture into small babbles and whines, your mind a fractured mosaic from the relentless pounding, each thrust grinding him deeper, the angle hitting that spot inside that makes stars burst behind your eyelids, tears gathering at your lashes as overstimulation continues to build. your cunt flutters wildly around him, the pressure growing heavier in your lower stomach, a tight knot that winds tighter with every snap of his hips, your moans turning into long, keening sounds that fill the room, mingling with anton’s low groans and the creak of the bed straining under the force. 

it makes anton angrier, the betrayal fueling the fire, and his free hand cracks across your face in a harsh slap, the sting blooming sharp and immediate across your cheek, forcing another moan from your lips, the pain twisting inexplicably into pleasure, slick dripping in fresh waves that make the squelching even louder, obscene and unrelenting.

“do…as…i… fucking… say,” he punctuates each word with a deep thrust, hips slamming forward so viciously it jars your bones, the length of him driving impossibly deeper, nudging your cervix with a pressure that builds the coil tighter.

you moan and writhe in his hold, the sensation growing from a heavy fullness to an urgent, burning need that makes your thighs quiver harder, your breaths coming in short, ragged pants, the build-up brutal, seconds stretching as the tension mounts higher, your lower stomach cramping with the intensity, half pulling you closer with desperate clenches, half trying to push away as it teeters on the edge of too much.

“tell sohee how much of a slut you are. say it out loud,” he repeats.

“i-i— fuck. a-an-t-ton plea—fuck,” you gasp, the words tumbling out in broken fragments, your voice a trembling thread barely holding together against the onslaught, the pressure swelling further, a hot, insistent knot that makes your hips roll involuntarily, chasing the release even as it terrifies you in its intensity.

“stop fucking sniveling and acting like a little bitch. let my best friend know that you’re nothing but a slut. a slut that cheats on their boyfriend just for some dick.”

“i-i’m a-a sl— fuck anton so deep.”

“i’m a-a slu-slut," you try again.

“can’t hear you, say it louder.”

he makes you repeat it, yanking your hair harder, thrusts digging deeper, leaving bruises on your hips where his fingers press like vice grips, squelches mingling with skin slapping skin, your high-pitched moans fracturing into sobs, anton’s groans turning rougher, more guttural as he loses himself in the rhythm. it's paired with sohee’s lazy strokes, his dick leaking precum in glistening beads that he spreads with his palm, the sleek sounds adding to the auditory chaos, the sight pushing you closer to the edge. the pressure in your lower stomach grows heavier, a coiling tension that starts low and spreads upward, making your thighs quiver uncontrollably, muscles tensing in waves as the orgasm approaches like a distant storm building on the horizon, each thrust adding to the fire until it’s a blazing inferno, your breaths turning into short, desperate gasps, tears streaming as the knot tightens to breaking point.

anton feels it, your walls clamping down in frantic pulses, and he yanks your head back further, exposing your throat, literring kisses up your throat as he fucks you through the cresting wave that continues to build.

“anton, fuck i’m—“

the climax crashes over you in violent surges that leave you shaking, your body convulsing as slick gushes out in hot, rhythmic spurts, squirting around his cock in messy arcs that soak the sheets and his thighs, your thighs quivering so hard they cramp.

a high, keening moan tears from your throat that echoes off the walls, half-scream, half-sob, your hips bucking wildly against him, half pulling closer to chase the blinding pleasure, half trying to push away from the overwhelming intensity that borders on pain. anton pushes through it all with relentless thrusts, his groans low and satisfied as he feels you shatter around him, but he doesn’t stop. 

even as the overstimulation turns the pleasure into a stinging ache, nerves screaming for mercy, your whines turning into babbled pleas.

“anton, too much, please.”

your body twitches uncontrollably, cunt spasming in helpless waves around his length, fresh tears spilling as the pressure builds again almost immediately, the compulsion overriding exhaustion, shame fueling the fire until you’re grinding back despite the burn, your moans continuing to rise in pitch.

"c-can-can't… t-take…"

eventually, his voice cuts through the haze, rough and commanding, “come over and shut her up”, beckoning sohee with a jerk of his chin, the invitation a bridge into deeper degradation, jealousy transforming into reluctant synergy. sohee approaches the bed, the mattress dipping under his weight, his energy provocative and taunting as he kneels in front of you, dick hard and curving toward his stomach, precum smeared along the length in shiny trails, leaking in fresh beads that glisten.

you’re forced to take him, anton’s thrusts pushing you forward onto sohee’s cock, the intrusion immediate and filthy, his hands fisting your hair to guide you deeper, using your mouth like a sleeve in the best, most depraved way. saliva spilling from the corners of your lips in messy strings that drip down your chin, pooling on the sheets, your throat convulsing around him as he hits the back with each shove, gagging you until tears stream freely, mascara running in black rivers that stain your cheeks. the taste is salty, musky, mixed with the faint tang of your earlier release still clinging to him, his hips snapping forward to fuck your face with a rhythm that matches anton’s.

bubbles of spit form at the base of his cock where your lips seal around him, dripping down his balls in frothy trails that he smears back up with his thumb, pushing it into your mouth alongside his dick for a moment, making you suck harder, your whines making him push deeper.

“that’s it, choke on it baby,” the nastiness is a sensory overload, your nose buried in the coarse hair at his base with each deep thrust, inhaling the sharp scent of his arousal, anton’s hands roaming your body, possessive even in his anger. the triangular tension is a power struggle where you’re the prize, trembling between fear and desire.

the build-up starts again, brutal under the dual assault, the pressure in your lower stomach returning as anton’s thrusts hit deep, the length of him grinding against that spot with every plunge, sohee’s cock filling your mouth in rhythmic pushes that make saliva drool down your chin in steady streams, the squelching from your cunt louder now, mingled with the wet glucks from your throat. your moans are muffled around sohee’s thickness, attempting to say something to anton—pleas for mercy or more, you can’t tell—but coming out as garbled vibrations that make sohee groan low in his chest, his hips stuttering as the sensation travels through him. 

your body shakes with the effort to hold it back, but anton drives deeper, harder, his voice a growl in your ear.

“you’re a filthy cockdrunk whore. this feels good doesn’t it?” driving impossibly deeper into you, the pressure exploding in a blinding release that has you quivering and shaking, mouth barely able to form words around sohee but he doesn’t care, pushing further as you try to babble a semblance of a coherent response.

“n-need to—“

you can’t take it, quivering and shaking, mouth barely able to form words, his thrusts digging deeper with each word, the squelch turning into a wet, relentless symphony as slick gushes anew, your thighs slick and trembling, minutes of relentless pounding making your moans turn into long, drawn-out wails.

“c-cumming-“

your body convulses in violent waves, a high-pitched moan vibrating around sohee’s cock as slick squirts in hot spurts, soaking anton’s thighs and the sheets again, your walls spasming in frantic milking waves that drag a groan from anton’s chest.

your body slumps onto the mattress, limbs heavy as lead, every muscle quivering with the aftershocks of overuse, your inner thighs slick and sticky with a mixture of cum and your own arousal that cools against your skin in uncomfortable patches, raising goosebumps that mingle exhaustion with the persistent, dull throb low in your belly, raw and protesting yet still greedy, the compulsion a relentless whisper beneath the fatigue despite your mind begging for mercy.

but he still doesn’t stop, pushing through the sensitivity even as you thrash and writhe. each thrust rolling his pelvis against you so the base of his cock grinds directly over your clit, the coarse hair there adding a rough friction that’s unbearable after the shattering orgasm you’ve already endured, the sensation a lightning bolt through your oversensitive nerves, making your hips jerk forward involuntarily even as you whimper, the wet, filthy squelch of him moving inside you filling the room louder than before. 

“still think sohee’s dick is better princess? still think it’s good enough to cheat on me with?”

you can’t speak, can’t breathe, can only choke and drool and whimper around the length filling your mouth, your body shaking between them like a ragdoll, skin flushed hot and slick with sweat that beads and drips.

sohee laughs again, dark and pleased, and reaches around to find your clit with two fingers, rubbing messy, firm circles that make your hips jerk forward involuntarily, the friction a lightning strike through your oversensitive nerves, pushing you deeper onto anton’s cock.

“she can’t even talk,” he taunts, pinching your clit lightly between his knuckles until you keen around anton’s shaf.

“too full of cock to form words. pathetic.”

sohee pulls out of your mouth with a wet, obscene pop, strings of saliva and precum stretching between your swollen lips and the flushed head of his cock before snapping, dripping in thick, glistening trails down your chin to splatter onto your heaving chest. your throat burns, raw from the relentless fucking it took, every swallow tasting of salt and musk and the faint metallic edge of your own tears. you gasp for air in shallow, ragged pulls, chest rising and falling too fast, the room spinning at the edges from how lightheaded you’ve become.

anton is still buried inside you, hips rolling in slow, punishing circles that keep you stretched and aching, every subtle shift grinding the long length of him against that bruised, oversensitive front wall until your cunt flutters weakly around him again, a helpless little spasm that draws a low, satisfied growl from deep in his chest. his fingers stay knotted viciously in your hair, yanking your head back harder, forcing your eyes to the ceiling while your body jerks between them like meat on a spit. the betrayal is still pouring off him in waves. you can feel it in the brutal grip, in the way his cock twitches angrily inside your ruined hole every time he remembers what you let sohee do to you behind his back.

sohee wipes the slick mess from your lower lip with the pad of his thumb, smearing it across your cheek like war paint, then leans down until his mouth is level with your ear. 

“greedy little whore,” he breathes, voice thick with cruel amusement, teeth grazing the shell of your ear before he bites down just hard enough to make you flinch. “bet you’re already thinking about how full you would feel with both of us wrecking that sloppy cunt.”

the words hit anton like a blade dragged across raw bone. you felt the exact second something inside him snapped and then reforged itself into something colder, sharper, more deliberate. his arms tightened around your waist until the bruises deepened, his breath stalled against your neck, and when he exhaled again it carried no heat, only the quiet, terrifying weight of a decision that had already been made.

he did not want this. that was the first truth clawing at him. some broken, still-loving part of him wanted to pull out, to shove sohee away, to gather what was left of you against his chest and pretend none of this had happened. but that part was drowning now, suffocating beneath the flood of images he could not unhear — your voice moaning sohee’s name through the discord call, the way your body had opened so easily for his best friend while anton had been gentle with you for months, believing it was enough. the betrayal was not just that you had fucked someone else, it was that you had chosen the very roughness he had always held back, the very intensity he had thought you didn’t need. you had thrown away everything gentle and real between you for this. for filth. for sohee.

so if filth was what you wanted, then he would give it to you. not out of generosity, not out of lust. out of pure, vengeful grief. he would make the destruction match the crime exactly. he would force you to take the thing you had betrayed him for in the most complete, most humiliating way possible, while he was still inside you, while he still controlled it. he would make sure the memory of this night lived permanently inside your body like a scar, so that every time your cunt ached for roughness in the future, the only thing you would feel was this moment — his cock and his best friend’s cock stretching you open together, the sick wet sound of it, the way he had looked you in the eyes while he did it. he would ruin you so thoroughly that you could never again separate the pleasure you had chased from the man you had destroyed to get it.

anton’s grip tightens in your hair until your scalp stings, a sharp hiss of possession escaping him as he suddenly yanks you and spins your limp body around like you weigh nothing. your knees sink into the rumpled sheets as he tugs you down hard onto his lap, his back braced against the headboard, legs spread wide so your thighs are forced open obscenely over his.

he reaches back over your shoulder without a word, his hand wrapping around sohee’s throbbing cock in a rough, possessive stroke. he milks a thick bead of precum from the tip, smearing the warm, sticky fluid over your already dripping folds and around the place where his own cock is. the filthy sound of the wet, obscene squelching as he coats both their cocks and your ruined hole  fills the room while he stares sohee dead in the eyes.

“since you love my sloppy seconds,” anton spits, voice low and venomous, cracking with raw hurt and fury.

sohee let out a dark, lazy laugh that vibrated against your ear. “fuck yeah i do,” he drawled, eyes flicking up to meet anton’s over your shoulder.

the air between them thickened instantly, heavy and electric, two dominant stares locked hard, something raw and territorial passing between them, charged with the kind of heat that had nothing to do with you for that single suspended second. sohee’s smirk deepened, slow and filthy, while anton’s jaw flexed, his fingers still wrapped tight around sohee’s throbbing cock, stroking it once more in a deliberate, possessive glide that made the tension crackle even hotter.

anton’s arms clamp around your waist like iron bands, fingers digging bruises into your skin as he forces your soaked pussy down onto his cock in one brutal drop, burying himself to the hilt with a wet slap that makes fresh cum and slick squirt out around the base and run down his balls in sticky rivers. your thighs spread wide and trembling over his lap, calves already shaking from the strain.

sohee moves without being told, his thick cock dragging hot and heavy along the curve of your ass, smearing precum across your skin in glossy streaks while his hands grip your hips hard enough to leave marks that match anton’s. you’re trapped between them now, body pinned and spread wide, cunt already stretched obscenely around anton’s length while sohee’s fat head nudges right up against your entrance alongside it, the blunt pressure already threatening to tear you open before he's even pushed inside.

the burning stretch hits as your pussy is forced wider, the rim yielding with a hot sting. you feel them slide against each other inside you, slick and rigid, rubbing together through your thin walls and pulling deep groans from both men.

once sohee sinks deeper the heavy splitting ache settles deep in your pelvis, your walls stretched paper-thin around two thick shafts, every vein and ridge dragging against you at once. the pressure is constant and blunt, making your breath come in short, ragged gasps.

“f-full…”

your body shakes violently between them, thighs trembling, sweat and cum dripping down your skin in messy trails, every breath shallow and desperate as the room seems to hold its breath for the moment.

the sensation keeps building in slow relentless layers, your walls fluttering and clenching around the constant rub of two cocks sharing the same overstretched hole, cream leaking out in thick messy pulses that coat their shafts. you are drenched, sweat pouring down your back and between your breasts, your whole body slick and shining while your consciousness starts to slip further at the edges, the room softening into a hazy blur around the edges of your tear-filled eyes as the overstimulation begins to coil tighter and tighter like a wire pulled taut across your nerves.

anton stares up at your face, eyes dark with months of betrayal boiling over into something feral and broken. his voice comes out rough and ugly for the first time ever, laced with pure venom that cuts deeper than any thrust. 

“look at you, cocksleeve. been letting my best friend use this sloppy cunt for months behind my back and now you’re creaming on both of us like a desperate cum rag.” 

he doesn’t soften the words. he snaps his hips up harder instead, driving both cocks deeper through the fluttering spasms that are already starting to ripple through you, fingers bruising your waist as he forces you to feel every inch of their shared claim while your head falls forward against his shoulder and a broken whimper slips out, “no—too deep—ahh—”

“cry harder, you pathetic cum whore.”

sohee's mouth finds your shoulder again, lips brushing the already bruised skin before he sucks hard, teeth grazing, leaving another dark bloom that throbs in time with your heartbeat. his kisses trail up the side of your neck. wet, open-mouthed, possessive, each one pulling a weak, shuddering sound from your throat.

"bet you're happy, princess," he murmurs against your ear, voice low and mocking, breath hot and damp. "you get the best of both worlds after sneaking around like a little whore."

his hips slam forward again, driving his thicker cock in deep alongside anton’s, stretching you wider with every punishing thrust while your body jolts and another weak overwhelmed sound tears from your throat.

they keep fucking you like that for long dragging minutes that feel like hours, rough and uncoordinated, the wet sounds of your creaming cunt growing louder and sloppier while your muscles locked and released in violent, uncontrollable spasms that rippled through your entire body. the ache deep inside keeps twisting and tightening, waves of heat rolling through your core in slow overlapping surges that make your breath hitch and your nails dig harder into anton’s shoulders, your body clenching around them in helpless fluttering pulses. yet they never slow, never give you a single moment to catch your breath, just keep grinding and slamming through every helpless contraction until the pleasure blurs into something deeper and more overwhelming and your sanity starts to fray at the edges like threads pulled loose from a tapestry already torn apart.

"s-sl-slow….please…slow d-down…“

in the tight enclosed space between bodies your hand snakes out on its own, trembling and weak, palm pressing against anton’s waist in a pathetic attempt to push him back, to create even an inch of relief from how impossibly deep they both are, how every thrust feels like they are splitting you open and flooding you with too much pleasure at once. your fingers twitch helplessly against his skin, every muscle seizing in violent little spasms as the brutal stretch and constant friction of two cocks sliding against each other through your thin walls turns your insides into liquid fire. the pressure is so deep and unrelenting it steals the air from your lungs, forcing out nothing but broken, overwhelmed whimpers while hot tears spill down your cheeks, blurring the world until all you can see is shifting colors and the sharp outline of anton’s face above you.

anton’s eyes flash with fresh rage. he grabs your wrist in one bruising grip and shoves your hand away like it is nothing.

“fucking take it,” he snarls, voice low and vicious, “and move that fucking hand before i tie it up for you.”

he drives his hips up harder, forcing both cocks even deeper, the brutal snap making your walls stretch tighter around them and sending fresh waves of unbearable pleasure crashing through you, so intense your vision flickers white at the edges and your thighs jerk violently against his lap while you sob out another broken string of words.

d-d-de-deep," is all you can manage, the word fracturing on your tongue, barely a whisper, hoarse and broken. your lungs feel crushed, every inhale shallow and stuttering, the weight of them both pressing inward from front and back stealing the space your diaphragm needs.

sohee laughs right in your ear, the sound dark and mocking as he cages you in tighter from behind, his chest pressed flush to your back so there is nowhere to go, nowhere to hide from the relentless double stretch.

“what happened to the slut that came to see me tonight?” he taunts, breath hot and wet against your skin.

“the one begging to be fucked like a desperate little whore? look at you now, twitching and trying to push him away when you’re finally getting exactly what you deserve, split open on both our cocks like the greedy bitch you are.”

his thrusts grow meaner, slamming in deep and holding for a second before pulling back, letting you feel the full drag of both of them sliding against each other inside you while your body keeps creaming nonstop, messy and loud, the overstimulation turning sharp and stinging at the edges while the pleasure underneath only grows heavier and more consuming, your limbs feeling heavier, weaker, barely able to do anything except tremble and take.

you can barely hold yourself up anymore, limbs limp and shaking, only their iron grips and the way they keep pounding into you keeping your body from collapsing completely while your consciousness slips further, vision swimming as your mouth stays open on soft broken sounds that barely form words anymore, “t-too much… ah—ahh—f-fuck…” and “f-full… s-so f-f—” over and over like a prayer you cannot stop whispering even as the relentless double stretch keeps forcing you wider, forcing you to take more even though your body is already spent and trembling and trying to pull away on instinct with every weak twitch of muscle.

minutes stretch into what feels like an eternity of punishing rhythm, their cocks rubbing together inside your overstretched cunt with every clash of their hips, the friction so constant and raw that it sends sparks shooting through every oversensitive nerve until your walls flutter continuously around them, clenching and releasing in helpless little spasms that milk them both. every movement sends fresh sparks through your clit and deeper inside, the pressure coiling tighter and tighter in your core until your entire body trembles between them, pinned and owned and slowly coming apart in long shuddering waves that refuse to end. the ache has turned into something thick and pulsing and almost unbearable, your breath coming in short desperate gasps against anton’s shoulder while more tears slip down your face and your mind drifts further into that hazy broken place where nothing exists except the overwhelming fullness and the way they refuse to let you escape it, the way every thrust drags you deeper into the storm of pleasure and pain and shame that has swallowed you whole.

anton’s stare never softens, his hands bruising your waist as he thrusts up harder, voice cracking with raw possession and rage.

“that’s it baby. squeeze both our cocks like the cheating little cocksleeve you are. you don’t get to tap out now after months of making me look like an idiot” the degradation spills out of him raw, every word dripping with the pain of months of lies, and it only makes your walls clamp down tighter, your body answering with another long rolling wave of spasms that leaves you whimpering.

sohee tightens his fist in your hair, pulling your head back just enough to growl against your ear, the words sinking into you like teeth.

“that's right princess. you’re taking two cocks in that greedy little cunt because you couldn’t keep your legs closed. pathetic. crying and twitching like you didn’t beg for this all those nights you snuck out to ride me instead.”

sohee's hand slides around to your clit , fingers circling with rough precision, the touch too much on nerves already raw and screaming. the pressure builds fast, swelling knot low in your belly that tightens with every grind, every deep plunge, the fullness so absolute you feel it behind your eyes, in your throat, in the tips of your fingers. another orgasm crashes through you without warning, violent and merciless, your cunt clamping down so hard around them both that they groan in unison, the contraction forcing out a hot gush of squirt that soaks their thighs and the sheets beneath you.

anton kisses you, desperate, messy, all clashing teeth and saliva, his tongue pushing into your mouth like he's trying to claim the last piece of you that hasn't been taken. sohee's mouth moves to the other side of your neck, sucking another bruise into the skin just below your ear, his thrusts turning sharper, more forceful, driving so deep you feel the shape of him pressed against your lower belly from the inside. the overstimulation is brutal now, pleasure long since curdled into pain, every nerve screaming, your body shaking so hard your teeth chatter, breath coming in short, panicked gasps between kisses.

"t-too much," you manage, the words slurring into a sob, barely coherent. "d-deep—'s too—"

sohee laughs softly against your neck, the sound vibrating through you, and snaps his hips forward harder, forcing both of them deeper at once. the stretch becomes unbearable, a burning, tearing fullness that steals every thought, every breath, your walls spasming so violently they push against the intrusion, trying to force them out even as your body betrays you with another gush of slick.

the pressure coils tighter and tighter in your core after what feels like endless minutes of being used without mercy, your walls fluttering continuously, breath coming in short desperate gasps against anton’s shoulder while your body instinctively tries to pull away again with another weak twitch of muscle that only earns you another bruising snap of anton’s hips.

the heat under your skin builds into something feverish, every inch of you burning as if the air itself has grown too thick to breathe, your eyes rolling back until the room dissolves into streaks of light and shadow. you writhe helplessly between them, trapped so completely that every twist of your hips meets only the solid wall of their bodies, no escape, no mercy.

when your release finally tears through you it unfolds in violent rolling waves that start deep in your belly and crash outward without warning, your cunt clamping down brutally hard around both shafts, spasming so intensely that a massive gush of squirt erupts from your overstretched pussy. the force is so strong it physically pushes both cocks out of you in one wet obscene rush, your holes fluttering and gaping in the sudden emptiness as heavy pulses of release soak anton’s thighs and the sheets below.

your body collapses forward, completely boneless, face pressing hard into anton’s chest while the aftershocks tear through you in trembling waves that leave you barely conscious, eyes heavy and fluttering, the world reduced to the frantic thud of his heartbeat against your cheek and the faint, broken chant that slips from your lips again and again, barely loud enough to be heard, “n-n-no m-more pl-please… n-n-no m-more pl-please…” the words dissolving into soft, exhausted sobs as your strength fails you, your mind drifting in and out of awareness.

the room grew quieter, still, the only sounds your shared breathing and the faint wet sounds as your body continued to leak slowly onto the sheets, the overstimulation fading into a deep bone weary satisfaction. anton stays buried inside you for one long, final second, his cock still twitching against your fluttering walls as though some last stubborn part of him cannot bear to release you. his arms remain locked around your waist, holding your limp frame against him like something he once loved and can no longer bear to touch. you feel the frantic hammer of his heartbeat against your breasts, the hot, uneven rush of his breath on your neck, the faint tremor in his muscles that tells you the rage has finally burned itself out and left only ash behind.

he pulls out of you with deliberate slowness, the wet, obscene sound of it echoing in the quiet room as another thick rush of cum leaks from your stretched, aching cunt and drips onto his thigh. you whimper at the sudden emptiness, your body still twitching with aftershocks, but he offered no comfort. he simply lifted your weightless frame off him and laid you down on the ruined sheets as though you were something fragile and repulsive at the same time, something that had once been precious and was now only evidence of ruin. his eyes moved over you in a slow, unhurried sweep: the black rivers of mascara dried on your cheeks, the purple blooms of bite marks across your shoulders, the dark handprints bruised into your hips, the way your legs remained parted and trembling, cum still leaking steadily from your swollen folds onto the mattress in slow, glistening drops. then his gaze lifted past you to sohee, still kneeling on the sheets, cock hard and glistening, that familiar smug curl beginning to form at the corner of his mouth.

sohee opened his mouth, the first cocky syllable already shaping itself, but anton silenced him with nothing more than a flat, empty look. no words passed between them. the silence stretched, thick and suffocating, broken only by the ragged, shallow sound of your own breathing. the rgb lights continued their slow, indifferent shift across the walls, painting everything in shifting hues of blue and violet and red, but none of it touched the cold that had settled in the space between the three of you.

anton stood up without hurry. he wiped himself clean with one of sohee’s discarded shirts, the motion mechanical and distant, as if his hands were performing a task his mind had already left behind. he pulled his clothes back on piece by piece — boxers, jeans, hoodie — each rustle of fabric loud in the quiet, each small movement precise and final. you felt the weight of your own body then, impossibly heavy, limbs useless and trembling, your mind floating somewhere just above the mattress in a hazy grey fog where the compulsion had finally gone quiet and left only the hollow ache of what remained.

still you tried. your arms shook as you pushed yourself up, barely managing to lift your upper body from the damp sheets. your voice came out hoarse and cracked, little more than a broken whisper as you reached one weak hand toward him.

“anton… please…”

he paused at the edge of the bed, back still half-turned, and for a moment the room seemed to hold its breath with you. then he turned, and whatever fragile thing you were holding onto collapses instantly. because the look on his face isn’t anger, isn’t even the kind of hurt you could beg forgiveness from, it’s something stripped raw and exposed, something that looks at you like you’ve undone him in a way that can’t be fixed. the softness that used to live in his eyes is gone, completely gone, replaced with something sharp and unguarded, something that doesn’t try to hide the way his gaze flicks over you, your body, the marks, the damp sheen of everything that still clings to your skin, and recoils, subtle but unmistakable, like the sight of you makes something inside him turn.

for a second, just a second, his eyes shine. it’s quick, almost invisible, but it’s there, a flicker of something wet and breaking, something that looks like it hurts, like this is hurting him in a way he doesn’t know how to hold. and then it’s gone, swallowed down, replaced with something colder, something that steadies him.

“anton i lov—”

“don’t,” the word cuts clean through you, sharp and immediate, his voice rough, stripped of anything soft, like it’s been dragged out of him and left jagged at the edges evidence of the quiet devastation that had taken root in his bones.

“you fucking disgust me. i don't want to see you again.”

it lands slowly, not all at once, but in pieces, each word pressing into you deeper than the last, forcing you to feel it properly, fully, until there’s no space left to misinterpret, no way to soften what he means. it’s not just this moment, it’s everything behind it. everything you let build quietly, everything you hid, everything you took from him while he was still giving you something real. the nights he held you without asking for anything back, the way his hands used to move over you like you were something to be careful with, the way he looked at you like you were worth loving . all of it folds in on itself, twisting into something unbearable now that you know what you were doing at the same time, who you were letting touch you, how easily you let it continue.

something in your chest gives under the weight of it.

the feeling isn’t sharp, not at first. it’s heavy, suffocating, like something thick and cold pouring into you, filling you up until there’s no room left to breathe properly, your lungs working against it, each inhale shallow and strained. your eyes burn, sting with the pressure of tears that won’t fall, like even your body knows there’s no relief in that now, no release that would make any of this smaller.

anton turned away again. his footsteps fell quiet across the floorboards, each soft creak of wood slicing through the room like the last breath of something dying, the only sound left in a world that had suddenly gone still and cold. you watched the line of his shoulders, tense and unyielding, the familiar curve of his back that you had once traced with loving fingers in the dark, the way his hand reached for the doorknob with the same steady certainty he had once used to pull you close at night, to hold you like you were the only thing that mattered. he did not look back, not once. not even a flicker of hesitation, not a single glance over his shoulder to the broken, leaking mess he was leaving behind on the sheets.

the door clicked shut behind him without a slam or a shout. nothing dramatic or loud enough to match the violence that had just torn through all three of you. just a soft, final sound, small and ordinary, yet it landed in your chest like a blade driven slow and deep, twisting until the pain bloomed hot and endless. the silence that followed was worse than anything that had come before it, thick and endless and complete, it wrapped around you like a shroud, pressing down on your ribs until every shallow breath felt like drowning in the cold, grey waters of your own ruin, filling your lungs with the bitter taste of everything you had destroyed.

sohee shifts from his position on the bed, the movement unhurried, almost absent-minded, his body stretching loose again. the space he leaves behind cools too quickly, the heat of him disappearing from your skin in a way that feels abrupt, unfinished, like something has been taken and not replaced.

he drags a hand through his hair, pushing it back from his damp forehead, fingers catching slightly in the mess of it before falling away, and for a moment he just sits there, shoulders rolling once, settling back into himself, back into something familiar and unaffected. his gaze flicks toward you briefly, not lingering, not searching, just a quick, passing look like he’s checking something off rather than really seeing you.

“clean up. you know where the bathroom is,” he says, voice even, casual, stripped of anything that might resemble care, like it’s an afterthought more than anything else, like it doesn’t matter whether you go or stay or fall apart right there in front of him.

without sparing your limp, leaking body even a second glance his body turns away from you completely as he moves back toward his desk, dropping into the chair with an ease that feels practiced, automatic, the soft creak of it filling the space. the glow of the monitor catches his face again, washing it in that familiar, artificial light, flattening everything, making him look the same as he always does.

focused, distant, untouched.

his hand settles on the mouse, fingers flexing once before clicking, the sound sharp in the quiet, followed by the low hum of the game loading back in, pulling his headset over his ears without a second thought. whatever this was, whatever just happened in this room, folds in on itself and disappears for him almost instantly, reduced to something small, something forgettable.

you lay there, twitching faintly, skin sticky and cooling, the taste of both of them still thick on your tongue, the deep, constant ache between your legs refusing to fade. tears slipped silently from the corners of your eyes, mixing with the drying mascara and spit on your cheeks, but you made no sound. the compulsion that had screamed inside you for months was finally quiet, exhausted, sated for the first time. and in its place was only the slow, crushing weight of what you had done.

anton was gone. the one person who had loved you gently, who had truly seen you, who had tried with everything he had to keep you safe and whole. you had destroyed it all, not in secret anymore, not in stolen afternoons or whispered late-night texts, but right in front of him, with his best friend’s cock buried deep inside you alongside his own, the three of you tangled together in the filth you had created. the shame no longer burned hot and sharp. it simply sat there now, heavy and grey and endless, pressing down on your chest until every breath felt like drowning in the slow, merciless ruin you had chosen.

this was your guilty pleasure, you understood at last, in the crushing silence that followed. not the heat, not the roughness, not even the filthy fullness of two cocks tearing you apart. it was the slow, merciless ruin that followed, the kind that hollowed you out from the inside and left nothing but aching emptiness behind. you were tethered to this hunger by invisible threads, frayed and worn yet unbreakable, and the harder you pulled against them, the tighter they bound you, until you were suffocating beneath the crushing weight of your own betrayal.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

the evening rain battered relentlessly against the thin glass of your street-facing windows, each droplet striking the pane with the restless insistence of fingernails scraping for entry, until the outside world dissolved into a blurred watercolor of streetlights bleeding across slick pavement and shadows pooling thickly in the corners of the empty road. beyond the glass the storm swallowed every familiar detail of the neighborhood, bending the light and distorting the quiet street into something unrecognizable, while inside your small house the air remained unnervingly still, stagnant in a way that felt wrong, heavy with the damp scent of old wood and the lingering warmth of someone who had only just left. the space had never seemed large, but tonight it felt suffocatingly intimate, the walls pressing inward with quiet patience. the house had always been too open, too exposed, a fragile shell of thin walls and narrow rooms where every sound traveled too easily and every shadow lingered just a little too long.

for the past hour the curtains had stayed drawn, thick fabric pulled tight across the windows as if cloth alone could preserve the fragile illusion of safety you had been clinging to ever since sungchan had stepped out into the rain with that apologetic half-smile still lingering on his lips. you had watched the taillights of his car dissolve into the downpour, waited until the sound of the engine disappeared entirely before locking the door behind him, telling yourself you would give it a few minutes before opening the curtains again. just a few minutes. long enough for the street to return to the quiet anonymity it had always held before tonight, long enough to convince yourself that whatever uneasy tension had crept into your chest when he left was nothing more than nerves.

but the minutes stretched into something heavier than expected, the silence settling too thickly inside the house, until the absence of sound began to feel unnatural. you stood there for a while with your hand hovering near the curtain, staring at the dark folds of fabric while the storm outside continued to hammer at the windows, and it was only when the weight of your own thoughts became unbearable that you finally drew the cloth aside.

you felt it before you saw anything.

the sensation arrived slowly at first, a faint prickle along the nape of your neck that crept downward with cold, deliberate fingers until it settled somewhere deep between your shoulder blades, that bone-deep awareness your body had learned to recognize long before your mind could name it. there was a particular weight to being watched by him, something heavier than ordinary attention, something that sank beneath your skin and rooted itself in the marrow of your spine, and the moment it touched you the air in the room seemed to tighten. the quiet stretched thin, the hum of the storm outside suddenly distant and muffled beneath the growing pressure inside your chest, because some primitive part of your instincts had already reached the conclusion your thoughts were still trying desperately to avoid. you stood there for a moment longer than necessary, your breathing shallow and uneven, your eyes tracing the rain-streaked window without quite daring to focus beyond the glass, as though the simple act of confirming what you already knew would somehow make it more real.

but the longer you waited the heavier that unseen gaze became, pressing through the pane with suffocating certainty, until the fragile illusion of safety collapsed under the weight of it and your eyes lifted toward the streetlight outside.

wonbin stood beneath the trembling halo of pale yellow light, drenched so thoroughly by the storm that the rain seemed to have soaked straight through to the marrow of him. dark raven strands clung to the sharp angles of his face in damp, curling lines, plastered against the smooth warmth of his honey-toned skin like ink bleeding slowly across parchment, framing the delicate constellation of moles scattered across his cheeks and jaw in a way that felt almost indecent in its beauty. water slid lazily along the curve of his temple and down the slope of his nose before collecting at the edge of his lips, and he caught the droplet with a slow parting of those soft pink lips before biting down on the lower one with deliberate patience, his gaze never leaving you for even the smallest fraction of a second. through the distorted veil of rain and glass his pupils looked impossibly wide, dark wells with no visible bottom, and the intensity of that stare stretched across the distance between you like something tangible, something invasive and endless that drained the oxygen from the room despite the ten feet of rain-slick pavement separating you.

there was something deeply wrong in the way he watched you. it was not simply anger or longing or even jealousy, but something colder and far more consuming, a quiet certainty of ownership that lived beneath the surface of his expression like rot beneath polished marble. the pane of glass between you felt suddenly fragile, absurdly thin in the face of the relentless focus of his gaze, because he did not look like a man observing from outside. he looked like a man patiently waiting for something that already belonged to him.

then his smile began to form.

it spread slowly across his mouth like the blooming of a bruise beneath skin, dark and deliberate and far too knowing, the kind of smile that had once made strangers turn their heads in admiration while it made your stomach twist violently with the sick familiarity of what lay behind it. it was a beautiful smile, unmistakably so, the kind that softened the sharp edges of his features and lit his face with an almost angelic warmth, yet the longer it lingered the more something about it felt wrong, stretched just slightly too wide and held just a little too long. because beneath the soaked elegance of his appearance, beneath the effortless magnetism that clung to him even while rainwater streamed down his face and darkened the fabric of his clothes, lurked the suffocating truth you had spent so long trying to outrun.

the man who had never once allowed you the simple mercy of breathing without his presence shadowing the air around you, his obsession tightening invisibly with every passing second like a living noose drawn slowly around your throat, each imagined rival another brutal tug on the rope, each moment you existed beyond his reach another offense he would eventually correct. there was something monstrous in the patience of it, in the meticulous way his darkness spread through your life like rot working its way through the beams of a house long before the collapse became visible. because loving him had never meant devotion in the ordinary sense of the word. it meant ownership, surveillance, the quiet understanding that every fragment of your freedom existed only until he decided it did not.

it was the kind of obsession that crept out beneath the cover of night with a blade in hand and the calm focus of a man performing necessary maintenance, slashing through the rubber of your tires while the street lay silent around him. where the morning would arrive with the cruel, quiet realization that the world outside your driveway had suddenly become unreachable. it was the kind that treated other men not as rivals but as intrusions to be removed, leaving behind the sickening aftermath of shattered faces and broken bodies gasping helplessly on rain-slick pavement, their features reduced to swollen ruin beneath fists that struck with the cold certainty of someone convinced he was merely restoring order.

but the true horror of him had never lived in those visible eruptions of violence; it lived in the quiet architecture of control he had built around you piece by piece, the slow invasion of every space you had once believed belonged only to you. cameras hidden in the shadowed corners of your own home, their glass eyes silently drinking in the small, private moments of your life without your knowledge, watching you move from room to room beneath the illusion of safety while somewhere miles away his phone glowed softly with the evidence of your existence. doors that had always been locked suddenly meant nothing when he carried a key you never knew had been copied, slipping inside while you slept so he could stand in the dim silence of your bedroom and watch the rise and fall of your breathing, studying your face with the reverent stillness of someone admiring a possession they refused to risk losing.

and then there were your shoes, the small, almost invisible cruelty of that detail revealing just how far the sickness inside him had spread. tiny airtags hidden deep within the soles of every pair you owned so that each step you took pulsed quietly across the screen of his phone like the rhythm of a second heartbeat, your movements mapped out in perfect, obedient lines across the city as though your body itself had become an extension of his will.

because that was the truth of loving someone like him, the slow, suffocating realization that you had never simply been part of his life. you had become the center of it, the fixed point around which everything else revolved, and the deeper the obsession rooted itself inside him the clearer it became that the world itself had begun to shrink, narrowing gradually until the distance between you and him was the only space left that mattered.

you tried to tear your gaze away from the window, to drag the curtain closed and bury the street behind a wall of fabric and denial, to convince yourself that the empty stretch of pavement outside held nothing but rain and darkness and the distant glow of streetlamps dissolving into the wet asphalt. yet your body betrayed you in the same way it always did when it came to him, locking you in place with a terrible, instinctive stillness, as though some deeper part of your mind already understood the futility of pretending he was not there. outside, the rain cascaded relentlessly down his frame, sluicing along the sharp lines of his shoulders and soaking through the thin fabric of his shirt until it clung to him like a second skin, outlining the rigid tension coiled through his body, the same dangerous power that had pinned you beneath him so many times before, that terrifying strength that lived quietly beneath his calm exterior until something inside him snapped.

and still he did not move. the downpour hammered against the pavement and plastered dark strands of hair against his face, but he stood there unmoving, unmoved, as though the storm itself had been summoned merely to frame him more dramatically against the night. his stare never wavered, never softened, the intensity of it cutting through the glass between you with suffocating clarity, and there was something profoundly wrong in the way he watched you, something that went beyond jealousy or anger and settled somewhere deeper, somewhere feral. the possessive hunger radiating from him seemed almost physical, thick enough that you could nearly taste the metallic edge of it at the back of your throat, that sharp tang of danger that had long ago become inseparable from the sound of his voice, the weight of his hands, the terrible certainty that once his attention fixed itself on something it never truly let go.

there were moments now when it felt as though something inside his mind had begun to rot slowly from the inside out, the decay seeping through the careful mask of composure he once wore so easily. you saw it in the faint tremor that sometimes passed through his hands when he thought you were not looking, in the way his smile stretched just a little too wide and lingered a little too long, like a crack spreading across porcelain that had been dropped too many times. whatever fragile thread of reason had once anchored him to the ordinary world seemed to have snapped months ago, leaving behind something hollowed out and darker in its place, something that did not simply love you but fed on the fear flickering across your face, something that thrived on the knowledge that your heartbeat still responded to him even when every rational instinct told you to run.

because the most terrifying truth was that he owned you even from out there, even standing motionless in the rain with water dripping from his hair and pooling at his feet. the distance between you meant nothing to him; it never had. he had always spoken about it with that quiet, chilling certainty, promising that he would follow you to the ends of the earth if he had to, drag you back from any calm shore or safe harbor you tried to build without him, because no one else could possibly understand what you were, what you needed, what only he could give. the thought sent a traitorous shiver sliding through your body, the sensation as shameful as it was undeniable, because beneath the terror there lived another truth you hated yourself for recognizing.

the intensity of him was intoxicating in a way that stability could never replicate, the violent collision of fear and desire igniting something reckless in your blood, something that pulsed hotter the closer he came to losing control. calm affection, gentle devotion, the steady rhythm of ordinary love had always felt strangely hollow beside it, colorless and distant compared to the way he made every nerve in your body scream to life. because loving wonbin had never been safe or quiet or sane, but it was vivid, explosive, impossible to ignore, and even as you stood there trembling beneath his unblinking gaze, some treacherous part of you still chased the dizzying high of it, the dangerous electricity of a man whose darkness had learned exactly how to set your world on fire.

then he was moving. crossing the pavement in three liquid strides, his boots splashing through puddles without care. his fist rose to pound against your door.

once.

twice.

three times.

each impact vibrated through the thin wood straight into your ribs until the sound became indistinguishable from the thunder of your own pulse.

and then the countdown began, his voice carving through the rain like a blade drawn slowly across exposed bone, the sound of it slipping beneath the door and crawling through the cramped air of the room until it settled in your chest like something alive, something patient, something that had already decided how this night would end long before you ever reached the safety of the lock.

“ten.”

the first collision of his entire body slamming into the door detonated through the house with such brutal force that the frame convulsed violently against your palms as you pressed your trembling weight against it, the wood vibrating beneath your skin like a living thing in agony while the shock of it travelled straight through your ribs and into your spine, leaving you with the horrifying sensation that you were no longer holding a door closed but bracing yourself against the full, unstoppable gravity of him. the monstrous certainty of a man who had never once accepted the idea that anything in the world could be denied to him.

“nine.”

another savage impact exploded against the barrier, harder this time, the sound of splintering wood cracking somewhere above your head as thin fractures spiderwebbed across the surface beneath your hands. and with it came the sickening awareness that the door was beginning to give in the same slow, inevitable way your mind had learned to give, because there was something about the rhythm of his violence, the patient way he delivered it in measured blows, that made resistance feel less like survival and more like a temporary inconvenience he would eventually correct.

“you know what happens when i get down to one and this door is still closed, baby.”

his voice slid through the narrow seams of the wood like damp air leaking into a sealed coffin, thick with that same velvet softness that had fooled so many people before, that calm, charming tone he wore like a mask in public while the truth of him lived here, outside the door, soaked in rain and breathing slowly between each number as if he were savoring the moment, savoring the fragile illusion of safety you had tried so desperately to build between yourself and the reality waiting on the other side.

“eight.”

another crash followed, bone-jarring and violent enough to shake dust from the ceiling, and the tiny room around you seemed to shrink with it, the air growing stale and heavy as paranoia began to crawl along the edges of your vision, because you couldn’t conjure up an escape plan, couldn’t think of an exit. and suddenly every inch of the house felt contaminated with the quiet certainty of him, the lingering knowledge that even when he wasn’t standing in front of you he was always somewhere nearby, watching, listening, waiting with the kind of endless patience that turned every attempt at escape into a delayed surrender.

“seven. six.”

each number fell slowly now, deliberate, punctuated by another brutal collision that sent the hinges rattling and the wood groaning like bone under pressure, until it began to feel as though the door itself were absorbing the violence meant for you, trembling helplessly under the weight of his determination while the sound of it filled your mind with memories you had spent months trying to bury.

the night you had run for the back door, the slick pavement beneath your bare feet, the desperate pounding of your fists against a neighbor’s porch while rain streamed down your face like something close to hope.

“five.”

the memory twisted violently in your mind because you could still see the way his expression had changed the moment the door opened. the sudden warmth blooming across his face as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and laughed softly, apologizing for your behavior with the gentle patience of someone handling a fragile, unstable thing, telling them you had been under so much stress lately, that sometimes you just got confused, just got frightened. the humiliation of that moment had burned almost as deeply as the pain that came after, the moment the door closed behind you and the sweetness vanished from his voice like a mask slipping back into place.

“four.”

another impact slammed into the door with enough force to bow the wood inward, the frame whining in protest as if the house itself were begging you to stop pretending this was something that could be held back forever, because the truth had always been simple, brutally simple, in the way all nightmares eventually are: there was nowhere you could run that he could not reach, nowhere you could hide that he could not eventually find.

“three.”

the next crash splintered the wood with a sharp, splintering crack that echoed through the room like a gunshot, and your hands trembled violently against the lock, the cold metal slick beneath your fingers as your lungs struggled to draw breath against the suffocating pressure building in your chest, because terror had stopped being a feeling and become something physical, something with weight and shape and teeth, curling itself around your ribs and squeezing tighter with every passing second.

“two.”

the number slipped through the door with horrifying calm, and suddenly your body understood something your mind had been too afraid to name. because running would not end this, fighting would not end this, hiding would only delay the inevitable moment when he would find you again with that same gentle smile and those same patient hands, explaining to whoever happened to be watching that you were confused, frightened, unstable, before guiding you back into the quiet privacy of your own home where the truth of him could exist freely again.

so even though every nerve in your body screamed to flee, every instinct clawing desperately for some impossible escape from the suffocating gravity of him, your shaking fingers finally closed around the handle, twisting the lock with a slow, trembling motion before pulling the door open just enough for the rain-drenched silhouette on the other side to step forward as the word two finished leaving his lips. the cold wet night rushed in, carrying him with it. his scent of rain and cologne and something sharper, like the copper tang of old bruises.

his hand shot through the gap before you could slam it shut, fingers wrapping around your throat with bruising familiarity, not enough to cut off air yet, but enough to remind you who held the leash. his voice was low and velvet-smooth, dripping with that manipulative honey that always masked the venom.

“i saw him leave.”

the words slipped into your ear like a blade wrapped in silk, soft enough that for a moment they almost sounded gentle, even as cold rainwater dripped steadily from his lashes onto your cheek. his smirk widened slowly as he watched your expression fracture, that same cruelly beautiful curve of his lips blooming across his face like a bruise spreading beneath pale skin. his free hand lifted with deceptive tenderness, fingertips grazing the line of your jaw in a slow, almost affectionate gesture that would have looked loving to anyone else. you knew those fingers too well, knew the quiet violence hidden inside them, the same hands that had painted purple galaxies across your skin on so many nights you had tried desperately to forget.

“you think you can hide from me, baby?” he murmured, his voice dropping lower as he leaned closer, the damp ends of his raven-dark hair brushing the sensitive skin of your neck. the touch sent an involuntary shiver down your spine despite the dread tightening inside your chest, because even now your body reacted to him with that same traitorous familiarity, the muscle memory of a hundred nights tangled together in ways that had long since blurred the line between tenderness and fear. his pupils swallowed the streetlight behind you as he studied your face, dark and endless, devouring every flicker of your panic.

“you’re mine. every inch. every thought. every pathetic attempt at freedom belongs to me.”

the sentence curled around your mind like barbed wire, tightening with every second you remained standing there beneath his gaze, because the terrifying thing was not the anger in his voice but the calm conviction underneath it. he believed what he was saying with absolute sincerity, the same belief that had followed you through every blocked number, every new lock installed on your doors, every whispered conversation with friends where you insisted this time it was really over. he had stood in the rain for hours just to watch the silhouette of another man leave your door, patient as a predator crouched in tall grass, waiting for the exact moment his prey would look up and realize it had never truly escaped.

“are you crazy? stop fucking stalking me,” the words tore from your throat, raw and jagged, scraping against the pressure of his palm. the accusation seemed to settle into the air between you like a live wire, humming faintly with danger the moment it left your mouth.

yet even as they left your lips, you felt the traitorous heat bloom low in your belly. the helpless rush of adrenaline and arousal that came only from him. only from the toxic gravity of his presence. the way his beauty and his brutality twisted together into something you could not quit. no matter how many times he had shoved you against walls, or screamed until your ears rang, or manipulated your tears into admissions of love that were never love at all.

his hand was still resting lightly along your jaw, his thumb grazing the edge of your skin in slow circles that might have looked tender to someone watching from a distance, yet the muscles beneath his fingers had gone strangely rigid, the subtle tension gathering there with a quiet inevitability you recognized far too well. you had spent months learning the language of his moods, memorizing the tiny shifts that preceded his anger the way sailors study the first tremors of a storm, and the moment you felt that stiffness in his grip a cold awareness slid through your chest.

but you forced the words out anyway, because the fragile defiance pushing them forward felt like the last piece of yourself you still owned.

“we’re done,” you said, your voice trembling despite the anger sharpening it. “i broke up with you last month. you don’t get to do this anymore.”

the smile on his face did not vanish immediately, which somehow made the silence worse. instead it lingered there in a slow, unnatural way, the corners of his lips twitching faintly as though the muscles themselves were confused by the sentence they had just heard. you watched the expression begin to falter piece by piece, the charming curve stretching wider for half a second before collapsing into something far more unsettling.

his brows drew together first, a slow knitting of confusion passing across his features like a shadow moving through water. the look might have seemed almost thoughtful to someone who did not know him, yet you recognized it for what it truly was—the first crack spreading across the carefully constructed illusion that had always lived inside his mind.

the smile twitched again. this time it did not come back.

his jaw tightened slowly, the muscle jumping beneath the smooth line of his cheekbone as the tension climbed upward through his face, draining the last traces of warmth from his expression. the beauty that had once made strangers stare now hardened into something sharper and colder, the symmetry of his features turning predatory in a way that made your stomach twist violently.

“done,” he repeated.

his grip tightened then, vicious and unrelenting, squeezing until stars exploded behind your eyelids and your vision blurred at the edges, your lungs burning as you scratched at his wrists with desperate nails, thrashing in his arms like a trapped animal while he watched your struggle with those black voids for eyes, drinking in every gasp, every tear, every second of your lightheaded surrender. his other fist slammed into your ribs with a sickening crack that sent white-hot agony blooming through your chest, the kind of blow that spoke of a man who had long crossed the line into something irredeemably cruel, sickly drawing soft circles on the stricken flesh as if to soothe you.

he released you only when the strength drained abruptly from your legs and your knees threatened to fold beneath you, your balance collapsing under the violent rush of oxygen returning to your lungs. the moment your body faltered he seized the opportunity with brutal efficiency, shoving you backward with such savage force that your spine collided with the wall behind you in a jarring impact that rattled through your skull, the brittle plaster cracking faintly where the back of your head struck it while his other hand lashed out behind him to slam the door shut with a final, echoing bang that sealed the room like a coffin lid sliding into place.

the sound reverberated through the cramped space with horrifying finality, the small room instantly transforming into something airless and oppressive, a sealed box thick with the damp scent of rain and the charged electricity of his presence. his fingers were already knotting violently into the roots of your hair, wrenching your head backward with such merciless force that pain flared across your scalp like fire racing along exposed nerves, the sharp burn of it making your eyes sting as your neck strained at an unnatural angle, exposing the fragile column of your throat where your pulse throbbed wildly beneath the thin surface of your skin.

he leaned in close enough that the damp strands of his raven-dark hair brushed against your cheek like cold fingers dragging slowly across your face, the faint scent of rainwater and sweat clinging to him as his breath ghosted hot and uneven against the shell of your ear. there was something profoundly wrong in the way he hovered there, something rotten and fractured beneath the surface calm of his breathing, the subtle metallic edge of a mind that had long since slipped past the fragile boundaries separating obsession from madness.

his other hand slid down to your hip and clamped there with bruising force, fingers digging hard into the soft flesh as though he meant to anchor you permanently in place, the pressure cruel enough to drive fresh pain through the fading yellow shadows of older bruises already scattered across your skin like a quiet map of every night you had tried to pretend was the last. with a sharp, possessive tug he shoved your lower body forward until you were crushed flush against him, your soaked clothes clinging together as every hard line of his frame pressed into yours with suffocating intimacy, leaving no space between you for air, for movement, for anything that might resemble escape.

in that suspended moment, with your breath caught somewhere between fear and the dizzying familiarity of him, his voice slipped out low against your ear, venomous and intimate all at once, the quiet tone far more terrifying than shouting could ever be, because it carried the unmistakable weight of something that had grown beyond reason, beyond restraint, something ancient and biblical in its jealousy, as though the simple fact of another man existing within reach of you had become an offense worthy of catastrophe.

“you still smell like him,” he murmured softly, his grip tightening in your hair until your scalp burned beneath his fingers.

the words slithered across your skin like poison, each syllable soaked in quiet fury as his nose brushed the curve of your jaw, drawing in a slow breath as though the scent itself were an insult he intended to punish.

“the filthy trace of another man’s touch clinging to your skin like a disease,” he continued, the calm menace of his voice somehow more chilling than the violence that had preceded it.

“i’ll rip it out of you. i’ll erase every second he existed inside your pathetic little world until the only scent left on you is mine, until the only name you can choke out between screams is mine, until even your bones remember who the fuck you belong to.”

his lips crashed against yours before you could answer, the kiss brutal and consuming, tasting of rain and fury and the salt of tears that had not yet fallen, his teeth catching your lip hard enough to draw the sharp bloom of copper across your tongue. still your body betrayed you in that horrifying, familiar way, arching toward him even as every rational part of your mind screamed in protest, because the terrible truth had already woven itself too deeply through the fragile wiring of your thoughts.

the cycle had become something instinctive, something older than logic. the ugly, intoxicating dance of passion and punishment that he had carved into the foundations of your life piece by piece, until the lines between fear and longing blurred into something unrecognizable, something that left your pulse racing not only with terror but with the twisted, electric thrill of being claimed so completely.

his breath brushed across your skin when he finally pulled back, chest rising and falling as though even he had to fight to contain the storm inside him, his dark eyes searching your face with a frightening intensity that made it feel as though he were peeling apart your thoughts one fragile layer at a time.

“you’ll never escape me,” he said quietly, the promise settling in the room like a curse etched into stone. “not in this life. not in the next.”

his thumb dragged slowly along the side of your throat as he spoke, the gesture almost gentle, almost affectionate, and yet the threat beneath it was unmistakable.

“i’ll burn down every safe place you try to build until you remember who you belong to.”

standing there with the rain still dripping from the dark strands framing his face, his honeyed skin glistening faintly in the dim light while those endless black eyes devoured every flicker of fear and hunger warring across your expression, you felt something inside your chest finally give way, the last fragile thread of resistance snapping quietly somewhere deep within the labyrinth of your mind.

because the truth was far more terrifying than anything he had said aloud.

the suffocating gravity of him had already rooted itself too deeply in the fragile architecture of your thoughts, dragging you back again and again into the same brutal orbit, where every bruising kiss and whispered threat wrapped around your throat like the most exquisite noose, tightening slowly until the only sensation left was the dizzying rush of being alive inside the destruction.

and no matter how many nights you swore would be the last, no matter how many doors you locked or promises you made to yourself beneath trembling breath, the pattern always circled back to this moment. to him standing impossibly close with that knowing look in his eyes.

because the high of wonbin, the terrifying, intoxicating intensity of his devotion twisted into something poisonous and obsessive, had long since become the only drug your fractured soul still craved.

and he knew it. he had always known it.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

the night air is a blade against your cheeks, yet it cannot cut through the slow, molten burn that has settled low in your belly, a burn that started hours ago and has only grown heavier, wetter, more insistent with every passing minute.

you stand outside sohee’s building, shoulders hunched inside your jacket, the wool pulled so tight across your waist it feels like the only thing keeping your body from splitting open and spilling its shameless want onto the pavement.

your thighs are already slick, the inside seams of your stockings darkened where the heat has been leaking steadily, silently, traitorously, ever since you kissed your boyfriend’s sleepy forehead and slipped out with a whispered lie about needing to go to a sleepover with your best friend. each pulse between your legs is a dull, greedy fist unclenching and clenching again, a rhythm older than thought, older than guilt.

the soft buzz of your phone in your pocket again, another heart, another “miss you baby”, another message you will answer tomorrow with a smile and a kiss and a mouth still tasting of someone else.

it wasn’t your fault you were carrying this sickness. this cruel, wordless hunger that wakes you before the sun, that slicks your folds while you are still half-dreaming, that tightens like wire around your spine in lecture halls and grocery lines until you have to dig your nails into your palms just to keep from rocking against the nearest hard surface.

your boyfriend, anton, your sweet, patient, beautiful boy, tries so hard; he kisses the tears from the corners of your eyes, murmurs love against your throat, laps at you with gentle devotion until you cum, once, maybe twice, his fingers laced tenderly with yours.

but the moment the last shiver leaves your body the hunger surges back twice as vicious, a starving animal that gnaws at your ribs while he sleeps, leaving you to grind helplessly against his mattress in the dark, muffling broken sobs into the pillow so he never wakes to the truth of what you are.

six months ago sohee discovered it by accident, or perhaps by instinct.

a house party, too much vodka, your boyfriend somewhere in the living room calling your name while you were already bent over the bathroom sink, skirt rucked to your waist, sohee’s hand clamped over your mouth and his cock driving into you with a force that rattled the mirror on its hinges.

four orgasms tore through you in under twenty minutes, each one wrenched out harder than the last until you were squirting in helpless, violent arcs that soaked his hoodie, the waistband of his sweats, the cheap tile beneath your feet. when he pressed his palm just beneath your navel and thrust himself to the hilt something inside you cracked open like a fault line and, for five impossible seconds, the hunger went perfectly, blissfully still. you blacked out with his name muffled against his fingers, limbs liquefied, vision whited out, the sickness finally lulled into silence by the brutal, perfect fit of him.

since that night you have betrayed every promise, every week, sometimes multiple times a week too, slipping away to feed the beast only he can quiet.

your boyfriend’s best friend since high school, the lazy-eyed boy with the careless mouth who laughs when you beg, who calls you filthy names and still fucks you until your body forgets its own name. only sohee can empty you out, leave you boneless and drifting in the soft, floating aftermath where nothing claws or burns or demands.

your phone vibrates again and you silence it with trembling fingers, feeling the fresh rush of warmth coat the inside of your thighs like liquid confession.

you had messaged sohee, texts piling up in a one-sided stream:

‘please, i need you, sohee, it’s bad tonight, answer me’, and called, the phone ringing into silence, his voicemail a cold, mechanical rejection that stung almost as much as his indifference.

but you’re here anyway, driven by the ache, the need, the addiction that’s consumed you since the night you met him, a night that feels like both a curse and a revelation, etched into your soul like a brand.

standing in the flickering light of the building’s entrance, your hands shaking as you fish the spare key from your bag and slip it into the lock. the one you had forged in a quiet act of desperation months ago, when sohee’s gaming marathons stretched into endless hours of unanswered knocks, unanswered texts, leaving you stranded on his doorstep, heart pounding, body thrumming with an ache that clawed at your core like a beast caged within your flesh. relentless, unyielding, a persistent, pulsing need to be filled, to be touched, to be seen, a fire that burns without end, no matter how many times you try to douse it.

the door creaks open, and the apartment yawns before you, a shadowed crypt of neglect, the air heavy with the stale scent of burnt ramen, the faint chemical tang of energy drinks, and the sour undercurrent of unwashed dishes festering somewhere in the gloom. no light spills from the hallway, no warmth greets you, only the faint hum of electronics and a sharp, muffled curse slicing through the silence.

“fucking idiot, i told you to go left,” sohee’s voice, low and laced with venom, punctuated by the rapid, staccato click of his keyboard, the rhythm of his world, one that spins without you, oblivious to the need that drives you here, night after night, like a moth to a flame that singes but never consumes.

you step inside, your heels clicking softly on the worn floorboards, the sound swallowed by the oppressive gloom. you’re dressed for him, always for him, hyper-feminine in a way that feels like both armor and surrender: a delicate pink dress, soft and clinging to your curves, lace trim grazing the tops of your thighs, lips glossy with cherry shine, lashes heavy with mascara, every detail a fragile plea for his attention, a desperate bid to be enough for a boy who’d rather grip his mouse than your body, your low self-esteem woven into every careful curl of your hair, every swipe of blush across your cheeks, a futile attempt to be seen in a world where you’re nothing but a shadow.

the bedroom door is ajar, a sliver of blue light spilling from his monitor, casting flickering shadows across the chaos—bedsheets twisted on the floor, an empty ramen bowl teetering on his desk, its broth a congealed ghost, a crumpled energy drink can glinting faintly in the glow.

sohee sits there, hunched forward, a fitted white tee stretched across his lean frame, grey sweatpants slung low on his hips, the waistband dipping to reveal a sliver of taut, pale skin, damp with the faint sheen of sweat from hours in this chair. his hair was a messy tangle of dark strands, the tips tickling his neck, somehow still maddeningly alluring, a careless beauty that makes your breath hitch, your core clench, the ache sharpening like a knife twisting in your gut.

his headset clamps over his ears, eyes glued to the screen, fingers dancing across the keyboard with a grace that sends a shiver through you. slender, quick, precise, moving with an effortless dexterity that you can’t help but imagine inside you, fucking you with the same skill he pours into his game, if only he’d care enough to try.

he’s a loser, a gamer boy lost in his virtual empire, but god, he’s beautiful, the kind of beautiful that breaks you, makes your body beg, your pussy weep, even as he ignores you.

he doesn’t notice you at first, too deep in his match, jaw tight, lips parted as he snarls another curse into the mic, “move, you fucking moron,” the words sharp, slicing through the haze of your lust like a lash.

you stand there, trembling, the ache in your core a living thing, pulsing with a need so intense it’s like your body is screaming, your panties already soaked through, clinging to your skin, your thighs pressing together in a futile attempt to quell the fire, a relentless, unadulterated lust that won’t rest until you’re filled, until you’re fucked senseless.

when his eyes finally flick to you, it’s not with warmth or want but with a cold, cutting irritation, a darkening in those sharp irises as he registers what your presence means—the never-ending hunger that clings to you like a second skin, the lust that spills over in the way your hands twist in your dress, the way your breath catches, your body vibrating with raw, primal need.

“fuck, you again?” he snaps, voice low and edged with venom, his fingers never pausing on the keyboard, the game’s frenetic soundtrack a mocking counterpoint to your desperation.

“i’m this close to winning, you can’t fucking wait?”

his words are a blade, carving through your fragile self-esteem, but they only make the ache worse, the barbed wire of his cruelty coiling tighter around your insides, your pussy throbbing with a need that drowns out the shame.

you shake your head, a small, pathetic gesture, your voice barely a whisper, “sohee, please, i can’t. i need–“ but he cuts you off with a scoff, his lips curling into a cruel, mocking smirk, the indifference in his gaze a wound that festers deeper than his words.

“pathetic,” he mutters, eyes flicking back to the screen, the click of his mouse relentless.

“fine, get over here. but i’m not pausing this for you,”his tone is a command, not a kindness, a dismissal wrapped in permission, and you hate how it sets your skin alight, the ache flaring into a fire that burns hotter at his cruelty, your hands trembling as you lift your dress, your soaked panties sticking to your skin, a testament to how deeply you’re caught in this toxic spiral.

you settle down onto his lap, the worn leather of the gaming chair cool against the backs of your thighs. your back presses flush to his chest, his body heat seeping through the thin cotton of his tee, heartbeat steady and indifferent beneath your shoulder blades while yours ricochets like a trapped bird. the monitors bathe you both in shifting violet and crimson, the game’s frantic soundtrack bleeding into the room, gunfire and explosions and the low, constant chatter of his friends through the headset that never leaves his ears.

sohee doesn’t speak.

he doesn’t need to.

one arm stays locked on the keyboard, fingers flying, wrist flicking the mouse in sharp, precise arcs, while the other slides down between your spread thighs without ceremony. the second his skin meets the mess you’ve made, he hisses through his teeth, a soft, scornful sound that vibrates against the shell of your ear.

“jesus fuck, you’re disgusting,”

he mutters, so quiet only you can hear, the words brushing the shell of your ear like a slap. no one in the call catches it; the mic stays angled away, for now. his fingertips come away glazed, strings of you stretching between them before he wipes the excess on the inside of your thigh like you’re a rag. then he’s back, parting your folds with two fingers, spreading you open just enough to make you feel how swollen you already are, how ready, how pathetic.

you bite down on your lip hard enough to sting, trying to trap the sound that wants to crawl out of your throat.

it doesn’t work.

the moment his thumb settles on your clit with just the right amount of pressure a broken sigh spills free, soft and wet and desperate. he circles once, slow and mean, dragging the slick up and around, coating you until every nerve is screaming. your hips jerk without permission, chasing the touch, thighs trembling over his.

he doesn’t look at you. doesn’t slow the game. his gaze stays locked on the center monitor, jaw tight, lips parted around silent curses at whatever idiot is feeding on the other team. the only sign he’s aware you exist is the way his fingers move; deliberate, mechanical, perfect. thumb still rubbing those cruel circles, he gathers more of your wetness and drags it downward, painting your entrance before he pushes two fingers in to the knuckle in one slick thrust.

the sudden, filthy stretch you’ve been aching for all day, the one your boyfriend could never give you because he’s too gentle, too careful, too in love with you to treat you the way your body demands. sohee doesn’t love you. he barely likes you. and that’s why it feels like heaven when his fingers bottom out, curling once, hard, against that spot that makes your vision white out.

every stroke is deliberate, unhurried, like he’s testing how little effort it actually takes to unravel you. the wet sound is soft at first, a quiet, obscene squelch each time he drags out and pushes back in, coating his knuckles, dripping onto the leather beneath you. you squirm helplessly, thighs trembling over his, hips rolling forward to chase the pressure because it’s never enough and it’s already too much.

you bite down on your lower lip until you taste gloss and blood, trying to cage the sounds clawing up your throat. a breathy moan slips free anyway, high and broken, but still too quiet for the headset to catch.

his curses keep spilling into the mic, low and vicious, “fucking die already, useless,” and every sharp syllable lands between your legs like another stroke, feeding the ache instead of killing it.

he picks up speed without warning, fingers driving deeper, curling on every inward thrust to scrape that spot that makes your vision flicker. the squelch turns louder, wetter, unmistakable now, and your hips buck hard, grinding down onto his hand like you’re trying to take more than he’s willing to give. another moan tears loose, louder this time, and you slap your own palm over your mouth to smother it.

sohee doesn’t even flinch.

he just spreads you wider with those two fingers, stretches you open for a heartbeat, then forces a third in alongside them. the burn is instant, perfect, a deep, filthy stretch that makes your back bow and your toes curl in your heels. your head lolls against his shoulder, eyes rolling back beneath fluttering lids, tears gathering hot and useless at the corners. your cunt flutters wildly around the sudden intrusion, walls rippling, trying to adjust, trying to swallow him deeper.

the orgasm hits like a wave breaking over jagged rock, sudden, violent, merciless. your entire body seizes, thighs locking rigid over his, pussy clamping down so hard on his fingers you feel the pulse in your throat. slick gushes out around his knuckles, hot and shameful, dripping down his wrist, pooling beneath you on the chair in a dark, spreading stain.

for two breathless seconds the ache goes quiet, a cruel, fleeting mercy, like the world narrows to nothing but the white-hot throb behind your eyes and the way your body shakes itself apart on his hand. your breath catches on a silent scream, tears finally spilling over, rolling down your temples into your hair.

the aftershocks still ripple through you, thighs twitching, cunt fluttering weakly around the three fingers he keeps buried deep, unmoving for a moment while the rgb lights strobe across your wet cheeks and parted lips. two seconds, maybe three, of that cruel, blessed quiet where the ache finally shuts up, where your body feels almost sated.

then it creeps back in.

a slow, treacherous heat unfurling low in your belly, the familiar pulse waking up again like it’s mocking the orgasm you just had. your hips give a tiny, involuntary roll, chasing the fingers that haven’t moved since you came. a soft, pathetic sound slips from your throat before you can stop it.

sohee feels it, of course he does.

he knows your body better than the boy who tucks you in at night and whispers i love you while you stare at the ceiling and count the minutes until you can sneak out. he knows one is never enough, knows the second the high fades you’ll be grinding down again like a desperate animal.

his fingers start moving while the next round is still loading, slow at first, dragging out with a filthy twist before slamming back in, rougher now, no pretence of gentleness. the squelch is louder, wetter, your cum and fresh slick coating his hand all the way to the wrist. your hips follow the rhythm without permission, bucking helplessly into every thrust, chasing that brutal pressure that only he gives you.

“not enough, huh?” he mutters, voice low and disgusted, meant only for you. his thumb finds your clit again, grinds hard once, twice, and your back arches off his chest.

the loading screen flashes and he uses the countdown. his hand suddenly leaves the mouse, snakes up to your throat, long fingers wrapping around it in one swift, vicious squeeze. your breath cuts off instantly, head jerked back against his shoulder, pulse hammering against his palm. his lips brush the shell of your ear, hot and cruel.

“fucking slut,” he hisses, so quiet the mic will never catch it, grip tightening until black dots bloom at the edges of your vision. “can’t even let me play without begging for more.”

he shoves a fourth finger in alongside the others without warning.

the stretch is blinding, a deep, burning ache that punches the air from your lungs and shoots straight to your lower stomach. you feel it there, a heavy, obscene pressure, like he’s rearranging your insides with one careless hand. your cunt spasms around the impossible fullness, walls fluttering wildly, slick gushing out around his knuckles and dripping down his wrist in thick, shameful rivulets. your legs kick once, heels scraping the floor, toes curling so hard they cramp.

he releases your throat the second the game drops back in, fingers flying to the keyboard again like nothing happened, but the ones inside you never stop, pumping hard, fast, merciless.

your second orgasm barrels through you before you can brace for it, sharper than the first, ripping a broken cry from your raw throat. your whole body locks up, thighs clamping around his arm, pussy clenching so hard on his fingers it hurts, another flood of cum soaking his sweatpants, the chair, your dress. your vision whites out for a heartbeat, tears spilling sideways into your hair, mouth open on a soundless scream.

the second orgasm is still pulsing through you when he keeps going, four fingers driving into you with the same ruthless rhythm, knuckles slamming deep, curling hard against the front wall of your cunt like he’s trying to punish it. the burn is vicious for the first few seconds, raw, oversensitive flesh screaming at the intrusion, but the ache underneath it is already waking up again, greedy and shameless, licking at the edges of the pain until they blur together.

your hips won’t stay still. they roll forward on every thrust, chasing the stretch, the pressure, the way he refuses to give you even a breath to recover. your own hand has found its way under the neckline of your dress without permission, fingers pinching and twisting your nipple hard enough to make you gasp into the humid air. your tongue slips out, just the tip, resting against your lower lip like a dog panting in summer heat, eyes half-lidded and glassy, tears drying on your temples.

he hits that spot again, again, again, the same brutal hook of his fingers that drags over your g-spot with every stroke. it makes your head swim, makes the room tilt, makes pleasure coil so tight in your pelvis you feel it behind your urethra, a deep, swelling fullness that presses outward like something alive trying to escape.

a shaky moan slips free before you can stop it, high and desperate. sohee’s head tilts a fraction, the only warning you get.

“be. fucking. quiet.”

each word is punctuated by a vicious thrust, fingers slamming in so hard your whole body jolts forward in the chair. you bite down on your lip until you taste blood, copper blooming sharp across your tongue. your free hand scrabbles for something to hold onto and finds the soft waistband of his joggers, bunching the fabric into a white-knuckled fist as your hips buck wildly, riding his hand like you’re trying to fuse yourself to it.

the pressure builds impossibly fast. a sudden, involuntary tightening low in your abdomen, muscles grabbing at his fingers and then letting go in frantic little pulses. your lower stomach cramps, thighs trembling harder, the opening of your cunt fluttering around his knuckles like it’s trying to push him out and pull him deeper at the same time. there’s a split-second of pure urgency, a hot, terrifying fullness right behind your pubic bone that makes you panic and crave all at once.

then it breaks.

the pressure drops like a dam bursting. a sudden, heavy push from deep inside, and warm fluid gushes out of you in a hard, forward arc, soaking his wrist, his forearm, splattering onto the floor between his spread legs. your pelvic muscles let go completely, spasming in violent waves, each contraction forcing another pulse of clear liquid out of you in rhythmic, humiliating spurts. your left leg starts shaking uncontrollably, thigh jerking against his, lower abdomen cramping in sharp, fluttering bursts that feel almost like pain.

you can’t breathe. can’t think. your vision tunnels to static and rgb light, mouth open on a silent scream, tears streaking sideways into your hair. the overstimulation is immediate and brutal, every nerve lit up and screaming, clit throbbing so hard it hurts where his thumb still rests against it.

the last spurt leaves you in a helpless pulse, warm fluid streaking down his forearm, dripping from his elbow onto the already ruined leather. the chair is destroyed, dark, spreading stains blooming across the seat, soaking through to the foam and his favourite grey sweatpants are plastered to his thigh in a cold, sticky patch that clings every time he shifts. you feel it cooling against your bare skin, the evidence of what your body just did, what it always does when he touches you.

sohee makes a low, disgusted sound against the back of your neck.

“messy slut,” he mutters, voice rough with contempt, but his fingers don’t stop.

if anything he drives them deeper, four thick digits spearing into you with wet, punishing thrusts that force another helpless gush of fluid out around his knuckles. each stroke is met with a small, shameful pulse, more slick leaking in rhythmic spurts every time your wrecked cunt tries to clamp down and fails.

the overstimulation is brutal, a hot, stinging ache that makes your thighs jerk and your breath hitch on tiny, broken sobs, but the hunger underneath it is worse. it’s already clawing back up your spine, greedy, insatiable, whispering that fingers aren’t enough, that you need to be stretched wider, filled heavier, fucked until your legs give out and the ache finally shuts up for good.

you need his cock.

you need it so badly your hips are rocking again without permission, grinding down onto his hand like an animal, chasing the promise of something thicker, longer, something that will press against your cervix and stay there until you can’t remember your own name. a pathetic whine vibrates in your throat, muffled against the heel of your palm, but he hears it anyway.

his fingers slow just enough to make you suffer, curling deliberately, dragging across that spot again so another weak spurt of fluid leaks out and drips off his wrist. your walls flutter uselessly around the intrusion, overworked and trembling, but still trying to pull him deeper.

“greedy little thing,” he says under his breath, barely audible over the constant clack of his keyboard and the low laughter of his friends in the call.

“just squirted all over my shit and you’re already begging for my cock.”

your answering moan is small, desperate, impossible to hide.

your hips roll forward again, shameless, chasing the slow drag of his knuckles, and you feel the hard line of him beneath the soaked fabric of his sweatpants, thick and half-hard and so close you could sob.

he lifts you just enough, one arm hooked under your thigh like you’re weightless, and the sudden emptiness inside you is a physical ache, a hollow, pulsing void that makes you whimper before you can stop yourself. slick drips in slow, syrupy strands from your cunt, landing on the soaked leather with soft, wet sounds that feel louder than the gunfire still blasting through his headset. the rgb lights strobe across your trembling thighs, painting them violet, crimson, violet again, every shift of colour catching on the sheen of sweat and cum coating your skin.

he doesn’t look at you.

he shoves the waistband of his sweatpants lower with one impatient jerk, cotton catching on the sharp jut of his hipbones before his cock springs free and lands heavy against his stomach.

it steals the air from your lungs.

thick in a way that feels almost violent, flushed a dark, angry red that borders on purple at the swollen head, veins thick and raised along the shaft like cables under silk, the slit already glistening with a fat bead of precum that trembles, then spills over, sliding slow and obscene down the underside.

he fists himself once, lazy, spreading the precum in a slow, deliberate stroke that makes the whole length gleam wet under the shifting colours. his eyes flick to you for half a heartbeat, just long enough to watch your lips part, to see the way your tongue touches your bottom lip without permission, then snap back to the centre monitor. the smirk that curls the corner of his mouth is small, cruel, and utterly satisfied.

“turn around,” he mutters, voice flat, already clicking again. “i’ll give you what you’ve been waiting for.”

your knees are shaking too hard to trust, but you move anyway, turning in the narrow space between his body and the desk, dress rucked up under your armpits now. you straddle him properly, knees sinking into the ruined leather on either side of his hips, and the heat radiating off his skin is a shock against your raw, oversensitive thighs.

his left hand never leaves the keyboard.

his right hand grips your hip hard enough that his fingertips dig crescents into your flesh, and he lines himself up with no ceremony, just the blunt, impossibly thick head of his cock nudging your entrance, smearing your own slick and the remnants of your last orgasm over your swollen folds.

you lower yourself onto him, feeling an actual slow, searing burn that starts where he’s stretching you open and radiates outward in white-hot rings, up into your belly, down the backs of your thighs, behind your knees. tears flood your eyes instantly, spilling over before you can blink them away, rolling in hot tracks down your cheeks and dripping off your jaw onto his shirt. your breath comes in tiny, wounded gasps, each one catching in your throat as another fraction of an inch forces its way inside, parting raw, overworked walls that flutter and spasm and still try to pull him deeper.

you’re only halfway down and you’re already full, forehead pressed to the damp cotton over his collarbone, nails carving burning crescents into his chest through the thin fabric. every vein drags like a ridge of fire, every subtle shift of his hips making the head nudge deeper, pressing against places so far inside you that your vision tunnels, black at the edges. sweat beads along your hairline, rolls down your temples, drips from your chin. your thighs tremble violently, muscles jumping, trying to spread wider and failing because there’s simply no more room, no more space for your body to give.

he still doesn’t look at you, eyes locked on the centre monitor, jaw tight, tongue touching the corner of his mouth in concentration while your entire world narrows to the impossible, exquisite split of being opened on his cock. your cunt clamps down hard, a frantic, milking spasm that drags a low, barely there, hiss from between his teeth, and his smirk widens, lazy, cruel, triumphant, because he can feel exactly how ruined you are and it still isn’t enough to make him pause the game.

you sink the final stretch, ass finally meeting his thighs, his cock buried so deep you feel the pulse of it behind your navel, a heavy, unyielding pressure that sits low in your pelvis like he’s rearranged everything inside you to make room for himself.

tears stream freely now, dripping off your chin in steady drops, your breath coming in shallow, open-mouthed pants against the hollow of his throat. you can’t move, can’t think, can only shake there impaled and stuffed so full it feels like he’s in your ribcage, your heartbeat fluttering wildly around the thick intrusion.

he gives you four full seconds of nothing.

then shifts your hips a fraction to the side so his left hand never leaves the keyboard, and starts fucking up into you with short, vicious, perfectly timed snaps that match the clack-clack-clack of his cherry mx blues like a metronome made of cruelty.

each thrust drags that fat, ruthless head across the spot your boyfriend has never reached, a spot that makes your spine bow and your toes curl and your vision white out in sheets. the wet sound of your cunt taking him is louder than his switches, louder than the explosions in his headset, louder than the broken, high-pitched noises you can’t swallow anymore.

you feel him, every inch, every pulse, the thick, unyielding girth stretching you to the brink, the tip pressing against your cervix with a pressure that’s both pain and pleasure, a raw, primal fullness that makes your thighs tremble, your acrylic nails digging into his thighs first, clawing through the soft fabric of his sweatpants, leaving crescent marks in his skin as you try to anchor yourself against the onslaught.

you’re getting hotter, sweat beading on your brow, dripping down your spine, soaking your dress, your body trembling as you try to bite your lip to suppress the sounds, to keep the moans from spilling out, but it’s no use. your voice fractures into high-pitched squeals, low, desperate groans, incoherent pleas.

“sohee, please,” the words lost in the haze of your lust, your body rocking against him, each movement sending jolts of sensation through you, the pressure building, a coiling tension in your core that winds tighter with every thrust of your hips.

you get louder, too loud, your moans fracturing into cries, and suddenly his hand leaves the keyboard, snaking around your throat with a swift, ruthless grip, fingers tightening until your breath catches in a soft, startled gasp, your head spinning as the edges of your vision blur.

“shut the fuck up, you whore,” he growls, his voice a low, vibrating snarl in your ear, the words dripping with venom, sending a fresh wave of arousal crashing through you, your pussy clenching harder around him, the degradation only fueling the fire, making you wetter, needier, your body betraying you with its eager response.

a particularly shattered cry tears itself from your throat, high and raw and utterly wrecked, the kind of sound that has no business existing outside a locked room. it spills into the headset like liquid, crystal-clear, impossible to pretend was anything else.

the discord call falls into a frozen hush for half a heartbeat, nothing but the faint electric hum of multiple headsets breathing in unison, the distant, arrhythmic clack of someone else’s keyboard echoing like a ghost in the background, then a low, drawn-out whistle slices through the tension, sharp as a knife’s edge. this is followed by a choked, incredulous laugh that builds like thunder, another voice muttering “no fucking way” in a tone thick with disbelief and amusement, and suddenly the dam shatters, unleashing a rolling wave of crude, masculine laughter that crackles through the speakers like wildfire through dry brush, each burst layered with the weight of mockery and unspoken envy, saturating the air with a sensory storm of humiliation that coils tight in your chest, hot and suffocating, even as it sends fresh sparks of forbidden arousal racing down your spine to pool between your legs.

sohee’s lips curl slowly into that lazy, cruel smirk, a subtle twist of his mouth that deepens the shadows on his face, carving lines of indifference and triumph into his features as if he’s savoring the taste of your degradation.

his hips keep snapping up into you in that same short, vicious rhythm, the fat head of his cock dragging mercilessly across the spot that makes your spine bow and your vision fracture into white-hot shards. the smirk that crawls across his mouth is slow, lazy, devastatingly satisfied, the kind of expression that belongs to someone who just won a bet he never even told you he placed.

he tilts his head just enough for the mic to catch every word, voice perfectly calm, perfectly flat, like he’s reading the scoreboard instead of buried balls-deep in the girl who’s currently sobbing his name.

“see, told you she was a slut,” he says into the mic, loud enough for his gaming friends to hear, their laughter crackling faintly through the headset, a humiliating chorus that burns hotter than your shame.

“came to see me and hopped straight on my dick.”

tears prick your eyes, humiliation creeping up your cheeks in a hot, burning flush, but you can’t stop, your hips bouncing harder, faster. the creak of his gaming chair grows louder, a relentless rhythm that matches the wet squelch of your pussy, the way his cock fills you, every vein, every ridge dragging against your sensitive walls, sending shockwaves of pleasure through your core.

“moaning while my friends can hear you, fucking whore,” he snarls, his breath hot against your neck, his hair tickling your skin as he leans closer, the words slicing through you, making your pussy clench tighter, your body trembling with the intensity.

“bet you’d want them all to stuff those holes for you. maybe then you’d stop humping me like a dog every fucking second.” his hand tightens on your throat, just enough to make you dizzy, your acrylic nails scrabbling at his desk now, clawing at the edge, leaving scratches on the wood, and he slaps your hand away with a sharp, “don’t touch my shit,” his voice a vicious snap as he protects his precious gaming throne.

“greedy little slut, i bet you’d love that, wouldn’t you?” he sneers, his voice loud enough for the mic to catch, his friends’ laughter faintly audible.

his words are still ringing in your ears, cruel, filthy, perfect, when the next orgasm starts gathering low in your pelvis like a storm you can already feel breaking.

you mewl, a small, pathetic sound of denial, shaking your head against his shoulder, but your body has already chosen its truth. your cunt spasms around him in greedy, fluttering waves, milking the thick length of him with every desperate bounce, every mindless grind, every shuddering breath. the laughter from the headset is a distant, tiny roar now, but it doesn’t matter; nothing matters except the way he fills you so completely that every shallow snap of his hips feels like it’s rearranging your insides, the fat head of his cock dragging across that spot again and again and again until pleasure becomes a living thing clawing its way up your spine.

he’s so deep.

deeper than anyone has ever been, deeper than you thought a body could take, the blunt, swollen head kissing your cervix on every perfectly timed thrust, a pressure that blooms into a dark, exquisite ache behind your pubic bone. every vein along his shaft drags against your raw walls like it’s branding you, every ridge catching on places so sensitive you see sparks behind your eyelids. your hips roll helplessly, chasing that pressure, chasing the stretch, chasing the way he refuses to give you more than the game allows and somehow it’s still too much.

the coil winds tighter, vicious and unstoppable.

your lower belly cramps with it, a hot, urgent fullness that makes your breath hitch in tiny, wounded gasps. your clit throbs against the coarse hair at the base of his cock, every grind sending white-hot jolts straight up your spine. tears spill sideways into your hair, mixing with the sweat at your temples, your mouth open on a continuous stream of broken sounds, high-pitched squeals melting into low, animal groans that don’t even sound human anymore.

you’re close.

so close your vision tunnels, the rgb lights strobing red and violet across the tears clinging to your lashes. your nails carve fresh crescents into his chest, dragging down until the cotton rucks up and your fingers find hot skin, slick with sweat. your thighs clamp tighter around his hips, trying to pull him deeper, trying to fuse yourself to the source of the only relief you’ve ever known.

and then it hits.

a sudden, violent clench low in your pelvis, your cunt locking down so hard around him that his rhythm stutters for the first time all night. your back bows off his chest, spine arching impossibly, head thrown back against his shoulder as the orgasm rips through you like a riptide.

pleasure explodes behind your eyes in white-hot sheets, every muscle seizing, thighs shaking so hard your knees skid on the soaked leather. a gushing flood of slick forces its way out around his cock, warm and unstoppable, squirting in messy, rhythmic pulses that soak his stomach, his sweatpants, the chair, the floor, until everything beneath you is drenched and shining under the shifting lights.

your whole body convulses, wave after wave, your walls fluttering and spasming in frantic, milking waves that try to drag him deeper even as the overstimulation starts to burn. tears stream freely now, dripping off your jaw, your voice cracking into a raw, continuous sob of his name, “sohee, sohee, fuck, sohee,” until the syllables lose all meaning and it’s just sound, just desperation, just the wrecked evidence of how completely he owns you.

sohee’s eyes flick to you, part shock, part cruel amusement, his lips curling as he takes in the sight of you—still going, still cumming, your pussy squirting in relentless waves, your body pushing past its limits, insatiable, unstoppable.

the last aftershock is still rippling through your ruined body, a trembling, liquid echo that leaves your thighs jerking and your cunt fluttering weakly around him, when sohee decides the game is finally, irrevocably over.

the headset lies discarded on the desk like a corpse, wires tangled, his friends’ laughter reduced to a faint, dying pulse in the background, irrelevant now, swallowed by the thick, humid roar of blood in your ears. both of his hands clamp onto your hips with a violence that steals what little breath you have left, fingers sinking into soft flesh until bone meets bone, until you know the bruises will bloom tomorrow in perfect, violet replicas of his grip.

the shift is instantaneous. no more shallow, controlled snaps timed to keystrokes.

he slams you down onto his cock in one savage, merciless stroke, bottoming out so hard your teeth clack together and a raw, guttural scream rips itself from the deepest part of your chest, echoing off the walls like a wounded animal finally set free.

the gaming chair shrieks beneath you, metal joints groaning, leather splitting at the seams, threatening to collapse under the sheer brutality of his rhythm. your breasts spill completely free of the soaked dress, bouncing with every punishing thrust, nipples dragging across the damp cotton of his shirt in sparks of oversensitive fire that shoot straight to your clit and make your spine bow like a drawn bowstring.

the outline of him is visible in your lower stomach, a thick, obscene bulge that rises and vanishes with every stroke, a living proof of how deeply he’s carved himself into you. his palm flattens over it, pressing down hard, cruel, forcing you to feel the shape of his cock moving inside your body like a second skeleton.

“look at this, whore,” he growls, voice shredded raw, all lazy gamer-boy detachment shattered into something feral and ancient. his other hand cracks across your ass with a full-force slap that detonates white-hot across your skin, the sting blooming into molten pleasure so intense your cunt clamps down hard enough to wrench a rare, startled grunt from his throat.

he fists your hair in one brutal yank, wrenching your head back until your neck is a straining, elegant arch, scalp screaming, tears streaming sideways into your ears in hot, endless rivers. pain and pleasure braid together so tightly you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins.

he fucks you like he hates you, like he’s trying to split you in half and watch the pieces scatter, each thrust so deep your vision fractures into constellations, your cervix battered into a dull, exquisite ache, your walls stretched raw and trembling around the impossible girth of him. the wet slap of skin on skin is deafening, a primal, rhythmic hymn that drowns out your own wrecked sobs, drowns out the creak of the chair, drowns out the blood thundering in your ears.

drool slips from the corner of your parted lips, glistening on your chin, dripping in slow, silver threads onto his shirt. your tongue lolls uselessly, eyes rolled back to whites, tears and sweat and slick painting your face into a ruined, devotional mask. you’re floating deep in subspace now, suspended in a velvet dark where nothing exists except sohee: the salt of his sweat under your nails, the sharp bite of his cologne laced with fresh exertion, the chemical ghost of red bull clinging to his breath, the relentless, punishing stretch of his cock carving you open from the inside out until you’re nothing but a vessel for him, a shrine built of trembling flesh and desperate, endless want.

you’ve cum so many times the numbers have dissolved into meaninglessness. the chair is a swamp beneath you, leather gleaming wet, puddles of your release cooling on the floor in dark, spreading lakes. every thrust forces another helpless gush out around his cock, squirting in messy, violent arcs that splatter his stomach, his thighs, the desk, the monitor, until the room reeks of sex so thick it coats your tongue like a second skin.

he grunts with every stroke now, low and animal, the first real sounds he’s made all night that belong only to you. the chair rocks dangerously, legs screeching across the floor, metal screaming, but he doesn’t care. he uses you like something bought and paid for, hips snapping up to meet every downward slam with brutal, perfect force, forcing you to take every inch, forcing your body to give and give and give until there’s nothing left but the wet, wrecked shell of you impaled and trembling.

you love the way he’s splitting you in half, love the way pain melts into pleasure so intense it feels like dying and being reborn in the same breath, love the way he’s finally, finally looking at you like you’re the only thing in the universe worth destroying.

your voice is gone, reduced to cracked, hiccupping sobs and high, desperate whimpers that spill out every time he bottoms out. your nails rake down his arms, his shoulders, anywhere you can reach, leaving red trails that make him hiss and fuck you harder, faster, deeper. your thighs are jelly, trembling uncontrollably, toes cramping inside your heels until the straps cut bloody lines.

he has you exactly where he had you the first time, that night months ago when he fucked you so stupid the beast inside you finally curled up and purred, quiet for once, sated, trembling, believing the lie that it could ever be enough.

your body is a live wire stripped bare, every nerve scorched and singing, thighs shaking so violently they can barely hold your weight, cunt stretched raw and fluttering around the impossible girth of him, so overstimulated that even the air feels like teeth against your skin. for one merciful heartbeat the insatiable hunger inside you seems tamed, lulled into a heavy, dazed silence by the sheer brutality of being stuffed so full you can taste him at the back of your throat.

but sohee doesn’t give a fuck about mercy. he never has.

he wants you broken beyond walking tomorrow, wants your legs to give out the second you try to stand, wants you curled on his floor whimpering while he queues up another twelve-hour session uninterrupted, headphones on, your ruined body nothing more than background noise he can ignore.

“take it,” he snarls through clenched teeth, hips snapping up into you with fresh, vicious force, each thrust a deliberate punishment. “fucking take it.”

your body is going limp, melting against his chest like wax under flame, nerves fried to cinders. a weak, trembling hand snakes out on instinct, fingers scrabbling at the sweat-slick plane of his lower stomach, trying to slow him, trying to beg for a breath that isn’t a sob. he swats it away like it’s nothing, the sharp crack of his palm against your wrist ringing out, and punishes you instantly by driving deeper, harder, the fat head of his cock punching against your cervix with a brutality that makes your vision white out and your spine bow.

you try again, both hands pushing feebly at his chest, nails scraping uselessly over damp cotton.

“s-sohee, i-i can’t—” your voice is a trembling whimper, cracked in half, barely audible over the wet, relentless slap of his hips against yours. “it’s t-too, fuck, much—”

he slaps your hands away again, harder this time, the sting blooming bright across your knuckles. his eyes are black under the strobing lights, pupils blown wide, mouth curled into something between a snarl and a smile.

“don’t fucking lie to me, you needy bitch,” he spits, voice raw and vicious, still contempt.

“you always come crawling back for more. you’ll be on my dick again before the sun’s up, crying for it like the desperate little whore you are.”

he fucks you through the protests, through the tears, through the way your body tries to curl in on itself. each thrust is deeper than the last, harder, faster, the stretch so overwhelming it feels like he’s trying to turn you inside out. your cunt clamps down in frantic, overstretched spasms, trying to take him, trying to survive him, squirting again in helpless, humiliating pulses that soak the ruined chair and drip in warm rivulets down your thighs.

you’re sobbing openly now, head lolling against his shoulder, drool slipping from the corner of your mouth, body jerking with every brutal stroke like a doll he’s shaking apart. your hands fall limp at your sides, fingers twitching, no strength left to fight, only to take.

a faint ping slices through the haze, the discord notification, a new avatar blinking into the lobby like a ghost rising from the digital grave.

anton.

sohee’s headset is off, tossed aside in a careless heap on the desk, but the mic is still hot, the call never ended, every sound, every gasp, every wet slap of skin hanging in the open air like an invitation to ruin, a forbidden broadcast of your betrayal echoing into the void where innocence goes to die.

sohee freezes for half a heartbeat, his cock twitching deep inside you at the delicious, forbidden realisation, a dark thrill that sends a fresh pulse of heat through your core, then a predatory grin spreads across his face, slow and vicious, like shadows lengthening at dusk across a forbidden threshold, his eyes gleaming with the kind of cruel delight that stirs something primal and broken in your soul.

he doesn’t mute. doesn’t leave the call. doesn’t even slow his rhythm. instead, he leans back in the wrecked chair, one hand splayed possessively over the obscene bulge of himself in your stomach, fingers pressing down just enough to make you feel the imprint of his dominance, and starts grinding slow, deliberate circles that force fresh tears from your eyes and a shattered whimper from your lips, the motion a torturous drag that rubs every vein, every ridge against your raw walls in a way that makes the shame twist into something darker, hotter.

the knowledge that anton, sweet, oblivious anton, might hear you unraveling for another man sending a forbidden rush of arousal crashing through you, making your cunt clench despite the exhaustion, making you want it more because it’s so wrong, so filthy, the ultimate aphrodisiac wrapped in guilt.

anton’s voice filters through the abandoned headset on the desk, soft, confused, heartbreakingly innocent, a gentle lilt that cuts through the haze of lust like a knife through silk, landing in your gut with a twist of horror and heat.

“sohee hyung? you there? i thought we were queuing up…”

sohee’s hips snap up once, hard, forcing another wrecked moan from your throat that echoes crystal-clear through the speakers, a sound so raw and filthy it could shatter glass, a betrayal broadcast in real time that makes your skin prickle with shame even as it sends a fresh wave of slick gushing around him.

“say thank you,” he murmurs against your ear, low and commanding, voice dripping with the kind of dark honey that makes your cunt clench despite the exhaustion, a command laced with the thrill of exposure.

“thank me for fucking you properly. say it loud.”

your tongue is thick, words slurred and jumbled, brain fogged by the haze of subspace and the relentless overstimulation, but you try, you always try for him, the syllables tumbling out broken and wet, each one a confession of your darkest desire.

“th-thank you… f-f-fucking me… making… feel so… so full… s-so good…”

he presses harder on your stomach, forcing you to feel every pulsing inch of him buried inside, a cruel reminder of your betrayal, the bulge shifting under his palm like a living testament to how completely he’s claimed what anton could never touch.

“good little slut,” he praises, loud and clear for the mic, his voice carrying through the open call like a blade unsheathed, slicing through the air with deliberate cruelty.

then, casual, conversational, like he’s discussing the weather while his cock drags slow and deep inside you, stirring the shame into something intoxicating

“and anton will never be able to fuck you like this, right? this pussy only cums for me.”

your body answers before your brain can, cunt spasming hard in greedy waves, another helpless gush of slick squirting out around him as shame and pleasure detonate together in a firestorm that leaves you shaking, sobbing, grinding down despite the burn, making the wrongness feel so right, so arousing that you want to drown in it, want the listener on the other end to hear how completely you’ve surrendered, even as the guilt twists like a knife in your chest.

anton’s voice cracks through the headset again, small and trembling, laced with the exact moment his world crumbles, a gentle tone filtering through the speakers abandoned on sohee’s desk, close enough that it cuts through the haze of lust and lands like a knife in your gut, piercing the veil of your darkest desire with the sharp sting of reality.

“babe?”

just that one word, soft, wounded, hanging in the air like a fragile thing about to shatter, his innocent confusion wrapping around your throat tighter than sohee’s hand ever could, a sound so heartbreaking it should stop everything, but instead it ignites the shame into an aphrodisiac so potent your cunt clenches harder, another wave of slick flooding out as the wrongness makes you wetter, needier, the thrill of being caught fueling the fire until you’re burning from the inside out.

sohee laughs, low and filthy, a sound that vibrates through his chest into yours, a dark rumble that sends shivers racing across your skin, and snaps his hips up harder, grinding deep, forcing another wrecked, slurred moan out of you that spills straight into the open call, a betrayal broadcast in high definition.

“hear that, anton?” he says, voice dripping with mock sympathy that’s laced with triumph, never slowing, never stopping, his thrusts turning even more deliberate as if to punctuate every word.

“that’s what she sounds like when she’s finally getting fucked right. by me.”

the line is silent for an eternity compressed into seconds, a silence so dense it has texture, like oil poured over water, thick and suffocating, heavy with the collective held breath of strangers and the boy who once traced constellations on your back with gentle fingertips, the boy who believed you were made of light.

every heartbeat in the room feels magnified, every wet shift of sohee’s cock inside you, every tremor of your ruined thighs, every tear sliding sideways into your hair amplified into something obscene by the knowledge that anton is listening, really listening, to the sound of his entire universe collapsing in real time.

then anton speaks again, and the voice that reaches you is not the soft, wounded thing you continued to expect, not the shattered cry of betrayal you had braced for, but something lower, steadier, laced with a darkness that curls hot and treacherous in the cradle of your belly, a tone you have never heard from him before, one that makes your overfucked cunt clench involuntarily around sohee’s cock even as fresh tears flood your eyes.

“is that true, my love?”

the question is quiet, almost conversational, yet it lands like a hand sliding between your legs in the dark, curious, possessive, hungry. a pause, thick enough to choke on, heavy with the weight of everything unsaid, everything suddenly possible.

“he fucks you that good? better than me?”

another breath, slower this time, deeper, the kind of inhale a man takes when he’s tasting something forbidden for the first time and realising he likes the flavour.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

you stand there on the cracked concrete stoop of his apartment building, the autumn wind clawing at your exposed skin like invisible talons, carrying the faint scent of rain-soaked asphalt and distant city exhaust that mingles with the earthy decay of fallen leaves crunching underfoot. your heart pounds erratically, a wild rhythm echoing in the hollow cavern of your chest, each beat a reminder of the folly you’re about to embrace once more.

the door before you is weathered, its paint chipped in jagged patterns like scars from forgotten battles, and you raise your hand to knock, knuckles hesitating for a breath before rapping softly against the wood. the sound reverberates too loudly in the otherwise quiet street, amplifying your vulnerability, and you feel a flush creep up your neck, hot and insistent, as if your body is already betraying you with its anticipation of rejection.

seconds stretch into an eternity, the wind whipping your hair across your face in tangled strands, and you shift your weight from one foot to the other, the cold seeping through the thin soles of your shoes, grounding you in this moment of self-inflicted torment. inside, you imagine him, eunseok, with his effortless dishevelment, perhaps lounging on that threadbare couch, scrolling through his phone with that detached boredom that defines him, oblivious or uncaring to the storm brewing at his threshold.

finally, the latch clicks, a sharp, metallic snap that jolts through you like electricity, and the door creaks open slowly, revealing him in fragments at first: the edge of his broad shoulder clad in a faded black t-shirt that clings to his frame just enough to hint at the lean muscles beneath, the tousled mess of his dark hair falling over his forehead in careless waves, as if he couldn’t be bothered to tame it.

he leans against the frame with that signature nonchalance, his right foot wedged casually to prop the door ajar, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his worn jeans that hang low on his hips. his eyes, those piercing obsidian depths framed by long lashes, meet yours with an indifference that borders on disdain, scanning you from head to toe in a slow, appraising sweep that makes your stomach twist into knots.

his hallway light casts harsh shadows across his face, accentuating the sharp cut of his jawline, the subtle hollows beneath his cheekbones, and the faint stubble that darkens his chin like a shadow of neglect. he smells of lingering smoke and something musky, perhaps the remnants of cologne from a night out, wafting toward you on the draft from inside, stirring unwelcome memories of pressed bodies and fleeting touches.

your breath catches, a shallow inhale that does little to steady the tremor in your limbs, as a wave of conflicting emotions crashes over you—desire, sharp and insistent, mingling with the dull ache of knowing this will end in pain, yet unable to tear yourself away from the magnetic pull of his presence. he tilts his head slightly, and there it is: his eyebrows furrow just a fraction, not in concern or curiosity, but in that subtle irritation, like you’re an unwelcome interruption to his evening solitude, a crease forming between them that deepens the intensity of his gaze, making you feel smaller, more insignificant under its weight.

the air between you thickens with unspoken tension, heavy like the humidity before a storm, layered with the faint hum of traffic from the street below and the distant bark of a dog echoing through the night. you can feel the heat radiating from his body, close enough to tempt but withheld like everything else he offers, and your fingers itch to reach out, to trace the line of his arm, but you clench them at your sides instead, nails digging into your palms as a anchor against the rising tide of need.

“you came to see me for what?” his voice finally breaks the silence, low and edged with that trademark apathy, each syllable dripping like molasses, slow and unhurried, sending a fresh dagger straight to the core of your heart.

not with fury or passion, but with the calculated chill of someone who wields indifference as a weapon.

his words hang in the air, punctuating the moment with their blunt dismissal, and you watch as his lips curve into that almost-smirk, a ghost of amusement that lacks any real warmth, feeding on the way your expression falters, the way your shoulders slump ever so slightly under the weight of his nonchalance. he doesn’t move to invite you in, doesn’t soften his stance; instead, he remains rooted there, a sentinel guarding his domain, his foot still blocking fuller entry as if to remind you of your precarious position on the periphery of his world.

‘at least he hadn’t slammed it in your face,’ you console yourself inwardly, the thought a meager shield against the onslaught of humiliation already brewing, but it’s threadbare, offering no real protection from the storm of emotions swirling within you—regret laced with exhilaration, shame intertwined with an inexplicable thrill that only his cruelty can ignite.

you sigh, the exhale shaky and drawn out, because you loathe this ritual, this stripping of your dignity in the dim glow of his doorway, where the flickering bulb overhead casts erratic shadows that dance across the walls like mocking specters. the part where you’re reduced to pleading, your voice a fragile whisper against the fortress of his apathy, knowing full well that song eunseok harbors no regard for your feelings, treats them as disposable as the wrappers from his late-night takeout scattered in his living room.

he can’t be bothered to reply to your messages, those digital pleas that accumulate like dust in your chat history, unread and unacknowledged, or to spare you a glance in the crowded bars where your paths cross, his eyes gliding past you with the ease of someone erasing your existence from his narrative. and after those frenzied encounters, when he’s fucked you into oblivion on his unmade bed, he rises without a word, trudging to the bathroom to wash away the evidence of your union, leaving you alone amid the tangled sheets, the cool air kissing your sweat-dampened skin as you gather the fragments of your composure.

it’s madness, this addiction to his neglect, how it coils around your heart like ivy, strangling yet sustaining, transforming the void he leaves into a craving that borders on ecstasy. your friends’ admonitions ring in your ears—stupid, desperate, blind to the red flags waving like banners in the midst of a storm—but their words only fuel the fire, intensifying the paradox where his indifference becomes the very elixir that quenches your thirst, a self-destructive loop where pain masquerades as pleasure, and you chase it willingly into the abyss.

he watches you now, that furrowed brow deepening as impatience flickers in his eyes, a subtle shift that sends a shiver down your spine.

“well?” he prompts, his tone flat, devoid of curiosity, as if your presence is a mild annoyance, like a fly buzzing at the window screen.

you swallow hard, the lump in your throat a tangible barrier, and force the words out, your voice barely above a murmur, trembling with the weight of your vulnerability.

“i… i just needed to see you, eunseok. please. you weren’t answering my texts.”

he lets out a scoff, a short, derisive sound that echoes in the narrow space between you, his head shaking slightly as if in disbelief at your audacity, and he straightens a bit, pulling his hands from his pockets to cross his arms over his chest, a barrier both physical and metaphorical.

“needed to see me? for what, exactly? you think showing up unannounced is gonna do anything?”

his words slice through you, precise and unforgiving, and you feel the heat of embarrassment flood your cheeks, mingling with the chill of the night air.

inside you, emotions layer upon each other like sediment: the sharp sting of humiliation, the dull throb of longing, the twisted satisfaction of being in his orbit, even if it’s as a supplicant at his feet. you shift closer, your foot inching forward on the stoop, but he doesn’t budge, his gaze hardening, those eyebrows still knit in that expression of mild exasperation that makes him look almost regal in his detachment.

“come on,” he drawls, his voice dropping an octave, laced with mockery that drips like venom.

“you’re really gonna stand there and beg? that’s what this is, right? you show up here, looking all pathetic, hoping i’ll throw you a bone?”

the humiliation burns, a fire that spreads from your core outward, heating your skin until it prickles, and yet beneath it simmers that dark allure, the way his words hook into you, pulling you deeper into the web of his toxicity. you nod, unable to deny it, your eyes dropping to the ground where a stray leaf skitters across the concrete, caught in the wind’s whims.

“yes,” you whisper, the admission tasting like ash on your tongue, but there’s a thrill in the surrender, a masochistic rush that makes your pulse quicken.

“i’m begging. let me in, please. i can’t stop thinking about you.”

he laughs then, a low, humorless chuckle that reverberates through the air, his head tilting back slightly to expose the column of his throat, and when he looks back at you, his eyes gleam with that predatory satisfaction, reveling in your degradation.

“pathetic,” he mutters, the word hanging like a verdict, and he uncrosses his arms, one hand coming up to rub at his jaw as if contemplating your worth.

“you know i don’t give a shit about you, right?” he continues, his voice smooth now, almost coaxing, but undercut with cruelty.

“why do you keep showing up here, knowing that, looking at me with those eyes when you know this.”

the question lingers in the air. why do you keep coming back, a moth drawn to the flame that singes your wings with every desperate flutter?

the answer lies not just in the emotional masochism that binds you to eunseok’s cruelty, but in the raw, visceral pull of your body’s surrender to him, a betrayal of your senses that makes the pain feel like a perverse kind of worship.

it’s the way he makes you unravel so effortlessly, his touch—when he deigns to grant it—a masterclass in calculated negligence. like when he’s sprawled on that sagging couch, one arm slung behind his head, the other lazily trailing between your thighs, his fingers moving with an almost bored precision, circling your clit with just enough pressure to keep you teetering on the edge, your hips bucking involuntarily as you chase the friction he dangles like a cruel promise.

his eyes, half-lidded and disinterested, flick to your face now and then, watching your desperation with that faint smirk, as if your pleasure is a mildly amusing sideshow, and yet those long, deft fingers know exactly how to coax you to ruin, dipping inside you with a lazy curl that presses against that spot deep within, drawing slick, shuddering waves that build until you’re gasping, pleading, “eunseok, please, don’t stop,” your voice a broken hymn to his indifference.

he doesn’t stop, not out of care but because it amuses him to see you fall apart, his movements unrelenting yet casual, like he’s flipping through channels while you writhe. and when he adds a third finger, stretching you with a slow, deliberate thrust, the wet sounds of your arousal fill the room, obscene and amplified by the silence of his apathy.

your body betrays you fully then, a gush of release soaking his hand, the couch, the coarse fabric darkening beneath you as you squirt, your thighs trembling violently, tears pricking your eyes from the intensity, and he just chuckles, low and derisive, withdrawing his fingers to inspect them with clinical detachment, wiping them on your discarded shirt without a word, leaving you panting, exposed, a mess of your own making that he takes no responsibility for.

or maybe it’s the way his body itself becomes a weapon of your undoing, the sheer size of him, the overwhelming presence of his cock when he finally decides to fuck you, each encounter a reminder of how he fills you in ways that blur the line between pleasure and pain. when he bottoms out, the stretch is so deep, so all-consuming, that your body can’t help but react, a visceral surrender that needs no warm-up, just the brutal reality of him pressing against the deepest parts of you, the tip nudging your cervix with every unhurried thrust, a sensation so intense it’s like a fist closing around your core.

you cum once, sometimes twice, just from that first full press, your walls fluttering wildly around him, a keening moan spilling from your lips as your body convulses, nails scrabbling at his back or the couch or anything to anchor you against the tidal wave of sensation. and he doesn’t even acknowledge it, doesn’t pause or marvel at how easily he unravels you, just keeps moving, his pace indifferent, hips rolling with that same mechanical rhythm, as if your orgasm is an inconvenience, a speed bump on his way to his own release.

your neediness shows in the way you chase those moments, the way you position yourself to maximize every thrust, angling your hips to feel him deeper, your hands clutching at his waist, urging him to go harder, faster, even when he swats them away with a tsk, muttering, “calm down, you’re too fucking eager,” his tone dripping with disdain that only makes you wetter, your body responding to his cruelty with a hunger that shames you.

you babble through the haze, “please, eunseok, need you so bad,” your voice raw, cracking with the weight of your submission, and when he grabs your jaw, forcing you to meet his gaze, the cold amusement in his eyes makes your climax hit harder, a second wave crashing through you as you clench around him, your cries muffled against his palm, your body shaking with the force of it, every nerve alight with the paradox of degradation and ecstasy.

his cruelty is there in the way he uses your body’s responses against you, knowing exactly how to push you over the edge and then withholding just enough to keep you dangling. like when he pulls out mid-thrust, leaving you empty and whining, your hips lifting off the couch in a futile attempt to follow him, and he laughs, a sharp, mocking sound, “look at you, humping the air like a desperate slut,” before slamming back in, the sudden fullness ripping another orgasm from you, your vision blurring as you scream his name, the pleasure so intense it’s almost painful, your body a live wire under his control.

he doesn’t praise your sensitivity, doesn’t marvel at how easily you fall apart; instead, he exploits it, dragging out your climaxes until you’re oversensitive, sobbing, begging for mercy he won’t grant, his thrusts unrelenting, his fingers occasionally dipping down to pinch or rub just enough to keep you spiraling, never letting you settle into comfort.

it’s the aftermath that seals the addiction, when you’re limp and trembling, thighs sticky with your own release and his, the air thick with the musky scent of sex and smoke, and he’s already pulling away, zipping up his jeans with that same bored efficiency, tossing you a rag to clean yourself up while he lights another cigarette, not offering you one, not touching you to soothe the rawness he’s left behind.

“you’re a mess,” he says, almost as an afterthought, his voice devoid of warmth, and you nod, agreeing, because you feel it—the wreckage of your dignity, the way your body hums with the aftershocks of his touch, the way you’re already craving the next time, knowing he’ll give you that same careless pleasure, that same cruel satisfaction that makes your orgasms feel like offerings to a god who doesn’t care to receive them.

you come back because of how his indifference amplifies every sensation, how the ease with which he makes you cum becomes a drug you can’t quit, each climax a reminder of your own pathetic need. a cycle where his cruelty and your submission intertwine, binding you to him in a dance of pain and pleasure that you can’t stop craving, even as it consumes you, leaving you hollow yet whole in the wreckage of his touch.

his eyes, cold and unyielding, track your every movement, lingering where your gaze betrays you, caught on the faint bulge in his jeans, half-hard from the chill or maybe from the sick thrill of seeing you grovel at his doorstep like a stray he’s grown tired of feeding.

his smirk widens, a knowing glint in his eyes as he catches your hunger, your desperation laid bare.

“what, you’re just gonna stare at it? so brazenly?” he taunts, his voice low and mocking, shifting his weight slightly to make the outline more pronounced, a deliberate move to stoke your need.

“you get all dolled up and drag yourself over here, looking like that, and think staring’s enough? use those pretty lips for me doll.”

the words ignite something in you, a twisted thrill that makes your thighs clench, your breath hitch, the humiliation feeding the ache between your legs. you swallow hard, your voice trembling as you force the words out, “please, eunseok, i need you. i know you don’t care, but i can’t stop—i need you to touch me, to use me, please.”

your voice cracks, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes, and he doesn’t laugh, doesn’t need to; the silence that follows is worse, heavy with his contempt, his eyes narrowing as he lets you stew in your own degradation, drinking it in like it’s the only thing keeping him here.

“jesus, you’re fucking sad,” he says finally, his voice flat, almost clinical, as he shifts his weight, one hand coming up to rake through his hair, a gesture so casual it underscores how little this means to him.

“a pretty thing like you, throwing yourself at me, when i wouldn’t even spit in your direction if you weren’t here begging for it.”

“so fucking pitiful angel. just how i like you.”

“alright, get in. don’t make me regret this,” he mutters, his voice devoid of warmth, stepping back just enough for the door to creak open wider, his foot no longer blocking the way as you scurry inside.

the door swings shut behind you with a dull thud, sealing you into the dim, cluttered world of eunseok’s apartment, the air thick with the stale musk of weed and the faint undercurrent of cheap beer, a scent that clings to the walls like a bad habit, much like your own compulsion to return to this place, to him.

your heart pounds in your chest, a wild, frantic rhythm that feels as fresh as the first time you stood on this threshold, as if the past year of this humiliating ritual—showing up at his door when your own fingers, shorter and thinner, fail to quell the aching need pulsing between your thighs—hasn’t etched itself into your bones, a cycle of self-ridicule you can’t seem to break.

you follow him inside, your steps tentative on the worn carpet that’s frayed at the edges, littered with crumbs and the occasional bottle cap, your eyes darting to the coffee table where scattered blunts and a chipped ceramic ashtray sit like a centerpiece of his indifference. you crinkle your nose at the acrid smell, a reflex you’ve never shaken, hating the way the weed’s pungence lingers on his clothes, his skin, a constant reminder of who he is when he’s not at the gym sculpting his body or tangled in someone else’s sheets.

song eunseok, the resident smoker, always rolling one up—sometimes with his loud, raucous friends sprawled across this same couch, sometimes alone in the quiet, his focus as sharp on the paper as it is absent from you.

he sinks into the couch now, the usual spot, his body sprawling with that careless grace, legs spread wide, one arm draped over the backrest, the other holding a fresh blunt as he licks the paper with a slow, deliberate swipe of his tongue. his eyes lock onto yours for a fleeting moment, dark and unreadable, sending a sharp tingle straight to your core. he knows what that does to you, the way that small gesture makes your pussy clench, your thighs pressing together instinctively under the hem of your skirt, which your fingers twist nervously, betraying the storm of anticipation and shame swirling in your gut.

he doesn’t speak at first, letting you stew in the silence, the only sounds are the faint crackle of the rolling paper and the distant hum of the city outside, filtering through a cracked window.

“don’t act like a virgin all of a sudden,” he finally says, his voice low and taunting, breaking the quiet as he finishes rolling the blunt, his gaze flicking to you briefly before returning to his task, barely acknowledging you as you stand there, fiddling with your skirt like a nervous schoolgirl.

“you’re the one who came here.”

the words sting, sharp and dismissive, a reminder of your own desperation, and you feel heat flood your cheeks. he leans back, striking a lighter with a flick of his thumb, the flame casting a brief glow across his sharp features and takes a slow drag, the tip of the blunt glowing red as he exhales a plume of smoke that curls lazily toward the ceiling, indifferent to your presence.

“if you want my cock,” he continues, his tone flat, almost bored, as he sets the blunt between his lips again, “if you want to be stuffed so badly like the whore that you are, come here and take it.” his eyes meet yours now, a challenge glinting in their depths, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, not warm but predatory, thriving on your humiliation.

“you’re a big girl, you can do that by yourself, right?”

the degradation lands like a lash, searing your skin, but it only fuels the ache between your legs, the wet heat soaking your panties as you scramble toward him, your movements clumsy with urgency. you straddle him, knees sinking into the couch on either side of his hips, your hands bracing against his broad shoulders, the muscle firm beneath his thin t-shirt, a stark contrast to the softness of your own trembling fingers. his semi-hard dick presses against you through his jeans, the bulge enough to make you roll your hips once, instinctively, a soft gasp escaping your lips as the friction sends a jolt through your core, your body already betraying how badly you need him.

he doesn’t hurry, doesn’t react, just takes another slow drag from the blunt, tilting his head back as the smoke spirals upward, his face a mask of indifference, eyes half-lidded and distant. you’re unconsciously grinding against him now, your hips dragging back and forth, the rough denim of his jeans catching against the thin fabric of your panties, sending delicious sparks through you, though it’s not enough, never enough, until he gives you more. your hands clutch tighter at his shoulders, searching his eyes for any flicker of warmth, but there’s only that cold amusement, watching you unravel with minimal effort on his part.

“please,” you whisper, the word slipping out before you can stop it, your voice cracking with need, “need—need you.” your nipples are hard, straining against the fabric of your top, your panties drenched, the dampness seeping through to his jeans as you move, and you bite your lip to stifle the moans threatening to spill, your body screaming for him to fill you, to stretch you until you break.

he exhales another cloud of smoke, the scent acrid and cloying, mingling with the musk of his skin, and finally his hands move to your ass, gripping the flesh with a roughness that makes you whimper, his fingers digging in just enough to bruise as he guides your hips along his length, the friction so exquisite you’re practically panting, your lip caught between your teeth to muffle the sounds.

“look at you, already a mess,” he drawls, his voice thick with smoke and mockery, the blunt dangling from his lips as he speaks, his eyes flicking down to where your hips grind against him, the wet patch on his jeans a testament to your desperation.

“can’t even wait, can you? just a needy little slut who’ll take anything i give.”

you grind harder, your body chasing the release he’s withholding, your hands sliding down his chest, desperate for the thing that made you come here.

you fumble with his belt, fingers clumsy with desperation, the metal buckle clinking as you finally free it, your breath hitching as you tug his jeans down just enough to reveal him. you pause, frozen for a moment, your eyes widening in awe again at the sight of his cock—thick and heavy, the flushed tip glistening with tiny beads of precum that catch the dim light of the apartment, a stark contrast against the taut, veined length that pulses faintly under your gaze.

it’s beautiful in a raw, almost cruel way, like a weapon crafted to unravel you, and you can’t help but stare, your lips parting slightly, a soft exhale escaping as your core clenches in anticipation, already aching at the thought of taking him.

eunseok notices, the way your eyes linger, and he smirks, taking a slow drag from the blunt still pinched between his fingers, its ember glowing faintly as he takes a lazy drag, the smoke curling from his nostrils like a dragon’s breath, his eyes low and hazy, pupils dilated from the weed sinking into his system, rendering him even more detached

“what, you just gonna stare at it?” he taunts, his voice low and mocking, the words slicing through your reverie, making your cheeks flush with a mix of shame and need. he doesn’t move, doesn’t help, just watches you with that detached amusement, the blunt dangling from his lips, his broad shoulders relaxed against the couch.

no sweet words, no gentle coaxing to ease you onto him, no fingers stretching you open or rubbing your clit to prepare you—he doesn’t bother with that, doesn’t need to, because he knows you too well, knows you’re a cock-drunk whore so addicted to him you’ll take it raw, unprepared, any way he gives it, and he revels in that, his smirk deepening as he exhales another plume, letting it drift into your face, stinging your eyes.

you take a deep breath through your nose, trying to steady the tremor in your limbs, because you know how big he is, how his size pushes you to the brink of what your body can endure, every time a test of your limits that leaves you trembling and spent. your hands brace against his shoulders, fingers digging into the firm muscle beneath his shirt, nails biting into the fabric as you anchor yourself, shoving your soaked panties aside with shaking fingers, too desperate to bother removing them. you position yourself over him, hesitating for a fleeting moment as the flushed tip of his cock brushes your entrance, slick and warm, sending a shiver up your spine that curls your toes, your body already bracing for the intrusion you know will wreck you.

slowly, excruciatingly, you begin to sink down, and the stretch is immediate, overwhelming, a searing burn that feels like he’s splitting you in half, his thickness so immense it forces your walls to yield in a slow, agonizing stretch that makes your breath catch, your body trembling violently as you fight to accommodate him. it’s not quick, not easy—every inch is a battle, the pain and pleasure so intertwined they’re indistinguishable, a delicious torment that has you babbling nonsense before you’re even halfway down, your voice a broken, breathless litany of “s-so big, seok,” “fuck, it’s too big,” spilling from your lips in soft, desperate whimpers, your head shaking slightly, eyes rolling back as the sensation consumes you, a white-hot pressure that radiates from your core, making your thighs quiver, your hands clutch tighter at his shoulders.

you take another deep breath through your nose, the air sharp with the acrid tang of his blunt, trying to ground yourself, but it only heightens the sensory overload—the musky scent of his skin, the faint creak of the couch beneath you, the slick, obscene sound of your arousal as you inch downward, each moment elongating the torment, the similar pleasure and pain stretching out like a taut wire ready to snap.

eunseok just watches, utterly unfazed, the blunt still dangling from his lips, smoke curling lazily upward as he takes another drag, his eyes half-lidded, glassy from the weed, fixed on the way your pussy struggles to take him, stretched taut around his girth, glistening with your need.

you’re only halfway down his cock when the sensation becomes unbearable, a fullness so intense it feels like your body might split at the seams, like he’s already stretched you beyond capacity, filling every inch with his overwhelming girth, the thick, unyielding weight of him pressing against your walls with a relentless pressure that makes you feel like you’ll burst if you take even a fraction more. your thighs tremble violently, muscles quivering under the strain, your breath catching in sharp, shallow gasps that hitch in your throat, the air thick with the acrid bite of his blunt and the musky heat of his skin.

tears gather at your waterline, blurring your vision as they threaten to spill, your body caught in a torturous limbo of pain and pleasure, squeezing so tightly around his massive cock that you’re frozen, unable to sink further, your walls clenching in a desperate, fluttering grip that makes every nerve scream, your mind a haze of babbling nonsense.

“s-so big, seok,” “fuck, it’s too much,” the words spill from your lips in a broken, whimper, soft and pathetic, echoing in the dim apartment like a plea to an indifferent god.

you try to speak, to tell him it’s all you can take, your voice a trembling whisper, “i can’t—”

“you will,” he cuts you off, his voice sharp and unyielding, a command that brooks no argument, his free hand gripping your hip with just enough force to guide you down further.

his eyes flick to where your bodies are joined, watching with that same clinical detachment as you struggle to take him, your walls fluttering around his girth, trying to accommodate the impossible stretch.

“all those times this pussy’s taken me, and you’re still struggling,” he says, his tone laced with mockery, a faint smirk tugging at his lips.

“relax, pretty. you’re squeezing me so tight i won’t fit.”

his words, that casual endearment laced with condescension, make you clench even harder, a fresh wave of arousal soaking you further, easing the way as you sink down another inch, your moans growing louder, more desperate.

his hand moves then, the one not holding the blunt, his fingers finding your clit and tracing slow, deliberate circles, the touch feather-light but precise, sending electric jolts through your oversensitive nerves, amplifying the raw stretch until it feels like your entire body is vibrating, caught in a feedback loop of agony and ecstasy.

your head tips back, a whimper escaping as the dual sensations collide, the burn of his size merging with the electric sparks of his touch, pushing you closer to the edge than you should be this soon, your body betraying you with its greedy hunger.

you keep sinking, inch by torturous inch, your thighs shaking harder now, your nails digging into his shoulders as you fight to stay grounded, the room narrowing to the feel of him filling you, the slick sounds of your arousal, the faint creak of the couch under your movements. when you finally take all of him, his cock buried so deep you can feel him pressing against your cervix, the sensation is so overwhelming it steals your breath, a raw, primal fullness that makes your entire body hum with tension.

“fuck, i—” you start, voice breaking, but before you can finish, it hits you like a tidal wave.

it begins as a faint, pulsing tremor deep in your core, where eunseok’s cock presses unrelentingly against your cervix, a spark that ignites slowly, smoldering at first, then flaring into a wildfire that surges through your pelvis, flooding your veins with molten heat, every muscle in your body tensing, every nerve alight with a raw, electric hum that builds, layer upon searing layer, until it’s a full-body inferno, consuming you from the inside out. your pussy clamps down around his massive girth, a vice-like grip that pulses in wild, erratic spasms, your walls fluttering and squeezing so tightly it’s as if you’re trying to fuse him into you, to make his presence a permanent scar on your body, your soul.

a low groan rumbles from eunseok’s throat, the first crack in his icy facade, a guttural sound that vibrates through his chest, barely audible over the wet, obscene squelch of your arousal, but it’s enough—enough to spur you on, to make your heart lurch with a twisted thrill, because even this small sign of his pleasure feels like a victory, a fleeting glimpse of him enjoying the wreckage he’s made of you.

the sensation is visceral, a primal surge that radiates from your cervix, where his cock presses with unyielding pressure, sending shockwaves of pleasure rippling through your abdomen, up your spine, down your trembling thighs, curling your toes so tightly in your shoes they ache, your fingers clawing at his shoulders, nails raking through the thin fabric of his t-shirt, tearing tiny holes as you anchor yourself against the onslaught.

your tongue lolls out, heavy and slack, drool slipping from the corner of your parted lips, dripping in slow, glistening strands that pool on his shirt, mixing with the sweat soaking your skin, the salty tang of it sharp on your tongue as you gasp for air, each breath ragged, uneven.

your head snaps back, neck straining until the muscles burn, a scream tearing from your throat—his name, “eunseok, fuck”—a raw, broken prayer that ricochets off the peeling walls, jagged and unfiltered, your voice splintering on the syllables as tears stream hot down your cheeks, carving paths through the sweat and grime, your body a quivering, convulsing mess as you grind down on him, hips jerking involuntarily, instinct driving you to chase every last pulse of the release.

your pussy pulses erratically, each spasm a desperate clench around his cock, and you feel it, the faint twitch of him inside you, a subtle throb that betrays his own arousal, spurring you on even as your body shakes uncontrollably, the pleasure so intense it’s almost agonizing.

it’s everywhere—heat flooding your chest, tightening your nipples until they’re painful against the damp fabric of your shirt, tingling in your fingertips as they dig into his flesh, buzzing in your skull until your vision blurs with white-hot stars, your eyes rolling back so far you see nothing but darkness, the room dissolving into a haze of sensation.

the air is thick, heavy with the mingled scents of smoke, sweat, and raw, primal sex, the faint creak of the couch a distant rhythm beneath the thunderous pounding of your pulse, the slick, gushing flood of your release soaking his jeans, your thighs, the worn cushions beneath you, dripping in warm, heavy rivulets that mark you as his in the most visceral, undeniable way.

every inch of you feels it, the orgasm a living, breathing thing that surges through your blood, your bones, your very marrow, leaving you trembling, gasping, sobbing, your body a quivering wreck in his lap, clinging to him like he’s the only tether to reality. the twitch of his cock inside you, that faint pulse of his own pleasure, drives you further, your walls milking in endless, shuddering contractions, each one drawing out the climax until it feels like it might never end, a relentless wave that crashes over you, leaving you hollowed out, yet somehow whole, the intensity lingering in your shaking limbs, your racing heart, long after the spasms begin to ebb, a living thing that breathes through you, binding you to him in this cycle of ruin and release.

his fingers keep circling your clit, slow and steady, prolonging the aftershocks until you’re whimpering, oversensitive, your thighs twitching as you try to catch your breath.

“already?” he scoffs, his voice dripping with disdain, the blunt’s ash falling onto the couch as he shifts slightly, his cock still buried deep inside you, unmoving.

“didn’t even have to do anything.”

your body is insatiable, a furnace of need that refuses to be quenched, even after the first orgasm leaves you trembling, your walls still clenching around eunseok’s cock, the fullness so overwhelming yet not enough to sate the hunger that drives you back to him time and again.

shakily, you lift your hips, thighs burning from the effort, the slick mess of your release easing the way as you begin to ride him, each movement deliberate, desperate, the angle stuffing you so full it feels like he’s carving a space inside you, his thickness pressing so deep you’re certain he’ll leave a dent, a permanent mark of his presence in your body, your soul.

you’re making the most noise, moans spilling from your lips in a broken symphony, high-pitched and needy, the wet sounds of your pussy sliding along his length filling the air, obscene against the backdrop of the apartment’s dim clutter—the scattered blunts, the chipped ashtray, the faint hum of the tv in the corner. each downward thrust drives him deeper, the tip of his cock brushing against your cervix, your head shaking involuntarily, eyes fluttering as you try to keep up, to prove you can take him, that you’re worth the fleeting attention he deigns to give.

eunseok’s eyes, dark and predatory, burn with a lust that simmers beneath his icy exterior, irises swimming with a twisted hunger as they lock onto your pussy, watching with sick fascination the way it stretches around his massive cock, so thick it forces your walls to strain, taut and glistening, slick with the creamy mess of your arousal and the remnants of your first orgasm, a slick sheen that coats him in evidence of your desperate need.

his tongue darts out, slow and deliberate, wetting his lips as he takes in the sight of you: pathetic, trembling, forcing yourself to accommodate his size, your tight pussy clenching and spasming in a futile attempt to take him fully, each movement a testament to your struggle, your desperation.

you’re riding him so pathetically, so desperately, your thighs burning with the effort, each lift and slam of your hips a labored act of devotion, your pussy so wet and warm it’s dripping, soaking his jeans, the couch, the air heavy with the musky scent of your need. he feels it—the way you clench around him, spasming erratically, overstimulated to the point of breaking, each movement a struggle against the overwhelming fullness, your body shaking as you force yourself to keep going, to prove you can take him, to earn even a flicker of his attention. he thrives on it, the sick satisfaction curling in his chest, knowing how much it’s costing you, how every slam of your hips is a battle against your own limits, your pussy so sensitive it’s almost too much, yet you keep going, driven by that twisted addiction to his cruelty, to the way he fills you like nothing else ever could.

his hand snakes around your neck, fingers wrapping around your throat with a deliberate, possessive grip, not tight enough to choke but firm enough to make you gasp, a soft, startled sound that sends a fresh jolt of arousal through him, his cock twitching inside you as another low moan catches in his throat, a guttural rumble that betrays his pleasure, the only sign he’s more than just a passive observer. your weak attempts to catch your breath, the way your hands clutch at his wrist, trembling, only feed his ego, his lips curling into a cruel, satisfied smirk as he watches you struggle, your eyes wide, tears brimming, your voice reduced to broken whimpers.

it’s all finally catching up to you, the relentless pressure of his hand around your neck, fingers tightening just enough to make your head spin, the edges of your vision blurring as a dizzying heat floods your senses, your pulse hammering beneath his grip like a trapped bird. your thighs burn, muscles screaming from the effort of riding him, each lift and slam a grueling test of endurance, your throat raw and scraped from the endless stream of moans and whimpers that have spilled from you, your body drenched in sweat, droplets rolling down your spine, soaking your shirt, clinging to your skin like a second layer.

your pace falters, thighs trembling as the pressure builds again, your head falling forward to rest on his shoulder, lips brushing against the warm skin of his neck, your breath hot and uneven as you pant against him, tasting the faint salt of his sweat.

“dumb slut, so stuffed she can’t even finish the job,” eunseok taunts, his voice a low, vicious drawl, a wicked grin curling his lips as his hands finally move to your hips, gripping them tightly when he senses your faltering, to keep you locked in place, ensuring you don’t stop before he’s deemed it enough, his touch a possessive claim that sends a fresh shiver through you, the roughness of his palms scraping against your skin, calluses from the gym adding a textured bite that heightens every nerve ending.

the pressure inside you swells now, that little feeling blossoming into something immense, a coiling tension in your lower belly that winds tighter with each rock of your hips, your breaths turning to gasps, your moans fracturing into sobs as the heat spreads, flooding your limbs, making your vision spot with white, the room narrowing to the feel of him inside you. the slick heat, the building wave that crests higher and higher, teasing the edge but not quite breaking, your body trembling on the precipice, muscles clenching in anticipation, the air thick with the scent of sweat and smoke and sex, every sense saturated, overwhelmed.

the second orgasm hits you violently, a tidal wave that crashes without warning, your body seizing as you cum, pussy clenching so tightly around him it’s like you’re trying to pull him deeper, your moans breaking into a chant of his name.

“eunseok, eunseok, fuck,” your voice raw, desperate, echoing in the small space.

your nails dig into his shoulders, hard enough to leave crescent marks through his shirt, your head thrown back, eyes rolling as the pleasure consumes you, a white-hot surge that leaves you gasping, trembling, clinging to him like he’s the only thing keeping you upright.

he doesn’t wait for you to ride it out, doesn’t give you a moment to catch your breath. planting his feet firmly on the floor, he drives his cock into you with a force so brutal it steals the air from your lungs, each thrust fast and relentless, the couch creaking under the violence of his movements. you almost lose balance, your body jolting with each slam, nails scrabbling at his shoulders as you try to hold on, your moans turning to broken gasps, eyes rolling back as the overstimulation borders on unbearable, a delicious kind of agony that makes your vision blur.

“fucking slut, coming here to ruin my saturday night,” he growls, his voice rough with irritation, one hand snaking down to your clit, three fingers rubbing back and forth with a speed that’s almost punishing, the friction sending sparks through your already oversensitive nerves.

“just wanted to smoke and play some games, but this fucking pussy—”

his words are a lash, each one stoking the fire in your core, and you moan, broken and desperate, “yes—f-f-fuck, right there,” the words barely coherent, tumbling out as your body shakes, the pleasure so intense it’s like a live wire running through you.

his fingers are merciless, rubbing your clit in tight, fast circles, amplifying the sensation of his cock pounding into you, the wet slap of skin on skin filling the room, mingling with the scent of weed and sweat and sex.

“such a greedy fucking pussy,” he continues, his voice low and venomous, dripping with disdain that makes you clench harder, your body betraying how much you love his cruelty.

“always wet and tight for me, always begging to be filled.” he thrusts deeper, impossibly so, each movement precise, deliberate, his hips snapping up with a force that makes your stomach lurch, the outline of his cock visible against your abdomen, a bulge that he presses down on, hard, his palm flattening against your skin, the added pressure making you cry out, a raw, animal sound as the sensation pushes you to the brink.

“i’ll fill you up if that’s what you want, baby,” he sneers, the word ‘baby’ twisted with mockery, not affection, his fingers never slowing on your clit, his cock driving into you with a relentless rhythm that leaves you teetering on the edge of another climax, your body already spent but insatiable, craving the destruction he promises.

and then it breaks, a sudden, violent release that surges from your core in a gushing torrent, a hot, slick flood that soaks his jeans, your thighs, the worn cushions of the couch beneath you, dripping in heavy, warm rivulets that pool and spread, the wet heat of it enveloping you both, marking you as his in the most visceral, undeniable way. your body convulses, hips jerking involuntarily as the squirt pulses out of you, each wave a fresh explosion of pleasure that feels like it’s fraying your nerves, tearing you apart at the seams, your eyes rolling back so far you see nothing but a haze of stars, your vision swallowed by the intensity.

high-pitched squeals spill from your lips, paired with deep, guttural groans that break into incoherent chants—“so, so good,” “eunseok, fuck, please”—your voice a raw, desperate wail, babbling nonsense as you slip deeper into subspace, the world narrowing to him, only him. his scent, musky sweat, acrid weed, the faint tang of cologne, fills your lungs, the only thing you can smell, the taste of his skin lingering on your tongue from where you’ve pressed your lips to his neck, the sound of his low, rumbling moans vibrating through your chest, the sight of his dark, lust-filled eyes burned into your mind even as your vision blurs.

your body shakes uncontrollably, thighs trembling, muscles locking, your hands clawing at his shoulders, nails tearing through his shirt, leaving marks that might bleed, your tongue lolling out, drool slipping from your parted lips in glistening strands, mixing with the tears streaming down your cheeks, hot and relentless, your entire being reduced to sensation, to him.

he works you through it, his thrusts unrelenting, each one driving deeper, harder, the tip of his cock grinding against your cervix, amplifying the aftershocks that ripple through you, your pussy pulsing erratically, milking him in desperate, shuddering spasms. pushing you past what you thought you could endure, the overstimulation a searing mix of pain and pleasure that makes your head spin, your vision spotting with white, your mind fracturing under the weight of it all. his cock twitches inside you, a subtle throb that feels like a lifeline, spurring you on even as your body threatens to collapse, consuming every thought, every feeling, until there’s nothing left but eunseok.

his scent, his touch, his cruelty, his cock.

in this moment, as the squirt keeps coming, a relentless flood that leaves you trembling, gasping, sobbing, you make up your mind. you don’t care how poorly he treats you, how he discards you like ash from his blunt, how he breaks you with every indifferent glance. you’d chase him to the ends of the world for this, for the way his cock makes you feel like you’re both shattering and whole, for the way he pushes you past your limits, into a subspace where he’s the only thing that exists, the only thing that matters.

he cums not long after, a low grunt the only warning as he spills inside you, warm and copious, so much it feels like it’s swelling your stomach, intensifying the fullness until you’re sure you’ll burst, the sensation overwhelming as his cock pulses, each spurt stretching you further, your pussy clenching around him in aftershocks. he doesn’t pull out immediately, letting you feel the weight of his release, the mess of it mingling with your own, dripping down your thighs, soaking into the already-ruined couch.

𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚

the warm summer night hums with a lazy, golden stillness, the air thick with the scent of jasmine drifting through the open window. a gentle breeze stirs the sheer curtains, carrying the distant chirp of crickets and the faint hum of cicadas, their song weaving into the soft rustle of sheets tangled around your legs. 

the room glows faintly with the amber flicker of a candle on the nightstand, its vanilla wax melting into a pool, the sweet scent mingling with the lingering musk of your skin—still flushed from jaemin’s touch, bruises blooming like dark roses where his hands had gripped. he lies beside you, bare-chested and smirking, the hard lines of his muscles catching the candlelight as he scrolls through his phone, the faint click of each screen a counterpoint to the night’s quiet rhythm. 

the sudden slam of a car door shatters the peace, a sharp crack echoing through the stillness, followed by the frantic stutter of the doorbell—urgent, insistent, a plea carved into the night. jaemin’s head lifts, a slow grin spreading across his face, eyes glinting with mischief. 

“your puppy’s here,” he drawls, voice low and dripping with delight as he rolls out of bed, the mattress shifting under his weight. 

his muscles ripple under tanned skin, each step a deliberate flex as he moves toward the stairs, exuding that effortless confidence you crave. you snatch a pillow from the disarrayed linens, the fabric cool against your palm, and hurl it at his back with a playful grunt. it lands with a soft thud against his shoulder, and he laughs—a deep, mocking sound—catching it mid-air without a glance, tossing it carelessly aside as he saunters downstairs.

he takes his time, footsteps deliberate and unhurried, the creak of each stair a slow torment stretched thin. the doorbell rings again, a desperate burst that makes jaemin’s grin widen, his pace slowing further as if savoring the suffering donghyuck must be enduring on the other side—standing there, heart pounding, each second a knife twisting deeper. finally, he swings the door open with a flourish, leaning against the frame, toned arms crossed over his chest, muscles flexing in a display that’s almost taunting, the warm night air brushing his skin.

there stands donghyuck, a wreck etched against the porch light’s soft glow. his mismatched slippers—one black flip-flop, the other a faded blue slide—scuff the welcome mat, his hair a wild tangle matted with sweat from a frantic drive, strands clinging to his forehead. 

his face is pale, hollowed out, eyes red-rimmed and glassy from hours spent staring at that video you sent, tears streaking dried salt down his cheeks. his clothes hang loose, rumpled and damp with perspiration, the thin fabric of his shirt clinging to a frame that’s lean but untoned, trembling now as if the sight of jaemin’s sculpted physique is a physical blow. donghyuck feels it in his chest already, the way the bile rises to his throat, chest tightening like a vise, hands shaking at his sides, knuckles white.

“jae, who’s that?” you call out from upstairs, voice lazy and sated, and it makes donghyuck take another shaky step forward, legs wobbling like they’re made of glass.

you emerge not long after, descending the stairs slow and deliberate, pulling on jaemin’s discarded shirt—the one that smells like him—letting it hang loose over your thighs as hickeys pulse fresh on your neck, a map of indifference to the boy crumbling before you. 

when he sees you like that, marked and claimed in another’s fabric, he collapses, knees buckling to the cold tile, breaths coming in shallow, ragged gasps that whistle metallic in his throat, hands clutching his chest like it might cave in. snot bubbles at his nose, tears spilling unchecked, face twisting into a mask of raw agony.

“oh, you’re here?” you say, annoyance threading through your tone like a sharp wire, as if his presence is an unexpected intrusion on this perfect night, despite knowing deep down he’d come running.

“but why—why are—why are you—” donghyuck stammers, words fracturing in his mouth, his heart hammering so fiercely against his ribs he fears it might give out, the world tilting as nausea claws up his throat, a sick nightmare unfolding before his wide, disbelieving eyes. the truth he’s fought to deny crashes down—your hickeys, jaemin’s smug presence, the video’s damning evidence—shattering his heart into jagged pieces, each beat a stab of pain, hands trembling uncontrollably as bile burns his tongue.

“why what, hyuck? you know why i’m here,” you reply, voice cold and steady, a cruel satisfaction curling in your chest at his unraveling, knowing this brutal clarity was the only way to sever the ties he refused to release.

“you saw it,” he gasps, the video flashing behind his lids—you in jaemin’s arms, your voice dripping with frustration about his inadequacy, how his neediness trapped you, until jaemin suggested sending that sex tape, a raw, undeniable proof that broke his fragile denial.

his breath hitches, a full panic seizing him, gasps tearing from his throat like a fish flailing out of water, chest heaving as tears stream, his body folding deeper into the tile, a broken shell under your unyielding gaze.

“it’s not my fault you were so needy and so annoying. you cried about everything, every time i had to leave you, you sobbed and begged like a fucking child and i’m sick of it,” you say, words slicing the air, your expression hardening with a dark glee, happy to finally lay bare the resentment that fueled this end.

“no—no—i love you,” he chokes, shaking his head furiously, sweat-slick hair whipping, desperate to drown your cruelty with the ache in his chest, clinging to the hope of keeping you despite the agony.

“well i don’t. i need a real man, one that will act like a real man, that will fuck me like one,” you retort, voice sharp, running a hand through your hair as memories flood back—nights of frustration, him finishing in two minutes under your touch, sheepish and useless, leaving you aching and unfulfilled, a burden you could no longer bear.

“for fuck’s sake you couldn’t even make me cum,” you add, the admission bitter on your tongue, recalling the growing exasperation, his inability a chain you refused to wear, knowing it’d be selfish to stay unsatisfied when jaemin offered release.

jaemin snorts then, a low, confident sound from his broad chest, his smirk unwavering, a man so assured in his prowess that failure with you seems an alien concept, his presence a stark contrast to donghyuck’s collapse.

“i can—i can be better, i’ll get better i promise i’ll—” he stutters, words tumbling in a frantic mess, hands clawing at the air, desperate to erase the disdain etched on your face, the boredom shadowing your eyes.

“tell me how i p-promise i’ll be better for—”

“no. i’m tired of having to teach you shit. of having to baby you through things donghyuck,” you cut him off, voice flat, exhaustion and irritation lacing each syllable, your patience worn thin by his endless pleas.

“please, y/n, don’t—i can change. give me another chance. i love you, fuck, i’ll do anything,” he begs, voice fracturing, body folding in on itself, slippers forgotten in the dirt, every plea a testament to how you’ve consumed him—his life, his purpose, the air he breathes, now slipping away.

“it’s done donghyuck, it’s over,” you declare, finality ringing in your tone, a dark triumph settling as you watch him break.

jaemin closes the door on his pleas with a final mocking laugh, the thud a decisive end, sealing donghyuck out into the warm night, his sobs filtering through like faint, haunting echoes of the ruin you’ve wrought.

but you know he’ll linger, a shadow you can’t shake, because you’re his god, and gods don’t die easy.

a week passes, each night a repeat of his desperate ritual—showing up at your door like a ghost summoned by his own ruin, pleading into the silence until the neighbors complain or the cold drives him away, only to return the next dusk.

tonight the rain lashes against your window like a vengeful lover, each fat droplet a staccato accusation drumming into the night. it’s late, too late for uninvited ghosts to claw their way back into your life, but there he is, donghyuck, a sodden silhouette on your doorstep, his shoulders hunched under the relentless downpour as if the weight of the sky itself conspires to crush him.

the bouquet of wilting lilies clutched in his trembling fist droops like a confession, petals bruised and bleeding water onto the concrete, while the small, gift-wrapped box at his feet, probably some pathetic trinket he scraped together from his dwindling paycheck, sits abandoned, an offering to a goddess who long ago revoked his worship rights.

you watch him from the warmth of your living room, the glow of your phone casting harsh shadows across your face as you scroll through notifications that mean nothing compared to the exquisite irony unfolding outside. 

he hasn’t moved in minutes, not since the bell rang and you cracked the door just enough to confirm it was him, eyes red-rimmed, lips chapped and quivering, that boyish face you once toyed with now a ruin of its former charm. 

depression has hollowed him out; you can see it in the sharp jut of his collarbones beneath the soaked shirt clinging to his frame, the way his cheeks have hollowed like forgotten craters. word on the street, whispers from mutual friends who still pity him, is that he’s unraveling: skipping meals until his stomach gnaws at him like a starved dog, staring blankly at code on his screen until his boss threatens termination from that cushy tech job he clawed his way into.

all because he can’t eat, can’t sleep, can’t function without the poison of you seeping through his veins. obsession isn’t just a word for him anymore; it’s oxygen, and you’re the only lung that can fill him.

you huff a low laugh as he finally shifts, dropping to his knees in the puddle forming at your threshold, the flowers scattering like defeated soldiers. water soaks through his jeans in seconds, but he doesn’t flinch, doesn’t rise.

he’s begging with his body now, a supplicant’s pose that screams his truth: without you, he’s adrift, worthless, a marionette with severed strings. you know this because you cut them yourself last week, when you grew tired of his fumbling attempts at pleasure, his eager but inept touches that left you arched and aching for more. 

“you’re boring me,” you’d hissed before, your voice a scalpel slicing through his whimpers. “so fucking useless. you can’t even do one thing right.” 

and now here he is, groveling in the rain, convinced that one more chance to debase himself might stitch him back together.

the bell rings again, a pathetic chime that tugs at something dark and indulgent in your chest. you let it linger, counting the seconds until his sniffles filter through the door like morse code for surrender. only then do you swing it open, the chill gust whipping your silk robe against your thighs as you lean against the frame, arms crossed, utterly unamused.

“what the fuck do you want, hyuck?” your voice is a lazy drawl, laced with the boredom of someone who’s already won the war.

his head snaps up, water streaming from his dark hair in rivulets that trace the sharp lines of his jaw, mingling with the tears carving silent paths down his flushed cheeks. those eyes, wide and glassy, framed by lashes clumped with rain and despair, lock onto yours with a hunger that borders on madness, pupils blown like he’s chasing a fix. 

“you,” he rasps, the word cracking on the edge of a sob, raw and stripped bare. 

it’s not just desire; it’s existential, a plea from the marrow of him, as if admitting it aloud might tether him to you again.

“gross.” the word drips from your lips like venom, sweet and slow, and you roll your eyes for the fifth time in as many minutes, the acrylic charm on your nail glinting under the porch light as you toy with it idly. 

his sniffle follows, a wet, broken hitch that echoes in the downpour, and you roll them again, harder, letting the exasperation hang in the air like smoke. pathetic. always so fucking pathetic.

he stammers, knees grinding into the concrete as he inches closer, the gift box forgotten in the puddle.

“i, i need to talk to you. please. just… hear me out.” his voice is a wreck, husky from the cold, snot bubbling at the edge of his upper lip as he wipes it away with a trembling sleeve, only smearing the mess further. 

you can smell him from here: rain-soaked desperation mixed with that faint, familiar cologne he wore to please you, now soured by neglect.

“why the fuck did you show up here?” you snap, your tone sharpening like shattered glass underfoot. “act like you had something so important to say when you weren’t even going to speak.”

“i-” he chokes on the syllable, fingers digging into the doorframe as if it might anchor him, his body shaking not just from the cold but from the sheer effort of holding himself together. 

snot drips freely now, unchecked, as tears spill over, and god, it’s almost artful how ruined he looks, nose pink and raw, lips parted in a silent beg, every inch of him screaming for the degradation he craves because it’s the only proof you still see him.

“words,” you hiss, leaning down just enough to let your gaze rake over him like a blade, cold and dissecting. 

“use them, donghyuck, or get the fuck away from me.”

the floodgates break then, his confession tumbling out in a fractured rush, laced with the kind of groveling that feeds the hollow ache in your gut. 

“i c-can’t, i can’t do this without you. please.”

“i know i fucked up. i know i wasn’t- enough last time. but let me try again. let me prove it.”

his voice cracks before the words even form, spilling out in stammers that sound more like choking than speech. 

“i–ii… i haven’t eaten,” he gasps, every syllable shredded, “i–i can barely get out of bed, my job’s—god, it’s hanging by a thread—” his chest heaves, sobs tripping over the confession, “but none of it… none of it matters, because you’re all i think about. every second, every fucking second.” 

he’s clutching at you now, shaking so hard it rattles through his bones, words dissolving into a pathetic mantra. “i need you. i need to be yours again. please… please, please…” the last plea dissolves into a wet, broken whimper, almost inhuman, more sound than language.

his voice fractures into sobs, hands reaching for your robe’s hem like a drowning man to driftwood, knuckles white and pruned from the rain. 

he’s on the verge of collapse, body folding in on itself, but he doesn’t stop, can’t stop, because silence from you is worse than cruelty. it’s erasure, and he’d rather you spit venom than forget him entirely.

a laugh bubbles up from your throat then, cruel and sharp, a cascade that slices through the rain like broken glass. it’s not pity that stirs it, not even the amusement of his ruin; it’s the sheer futility, the way his obsession has carved him hollow while you remain untouched, your nights unbroken. 

unmoved by the skeletal hollows under his eyes, the tremor in his pleas that speaks of nights spent clutching your pillow like a lifeline, you straighten, letting the door swing shut in his face with a decisive thud, like you did that day.

the sound punctuates your laughter as you turn away, the echo of it trailing you like smoke, delicious and untethered, as you pad toward the kitchen.

let him kneel there in the deluge; he’s the architect of his own misery, after all.

the pour of bourbon into a tumbler is ritual, the amber liquid glugging slow and indifferent against the ice’s crackle, a balm for the faint itch his desperation stirs. you sip, letting the burn settle low in your chest, then drift upstairs to the laundry hamper, sorting silks from cottons with mechanical grace, one of his old shirts still tangled in the linens, a relic you haven’t bothered to toss. the rain’s rhythm against the roof is a lullaby of indifference as you hum under your breath, the world narrowing to the mundane until it’s time for the blinds.

you reach for the cord, the slats whispering shut on the night, but pause. there, through the sliver of glass, he’s a statue in the storm.

donghyuck, unchanged: knees locked in supplication, body shuddering under the onslaught, rain plastering his hair like a crown of thorns, but making no move to rise, no bid for shelter beyond the offering at his feet. still as death, save for the quake that rattles his frame, a portrait of abject devotion etched in water and want.

you huff again, half scorn, half reluctant awe at the theater of it. pathetic, yes, but god, the composition begs for a snapshot: his bowed head a study in surrender, the lilies’ petals a tragic confetti around him. your phone twitches in your hand, thumb hovering over the camera, temptation coiling like smoke. 

but no, pity flickers, or perhaps it’s the hollow echo of your own voids calling for company. the right thing, you muse with a wry twist of your lips, would be to help. even if he forged these chains himself, link by sniveling link.

down the stairs you go, barefoot and unhurried, the bourbon’s warmth a lazy hum in your veins. the door swings open on its hinges, the gust clawing at your robe like an insistent lover, and only then does he fracture, his body breaking that eerie vigil as his head lifts, slow and reverent. tears cling to his lashes like dew on wilted petals, his nose a raw, flushed pink from the cold and his own unchecked weeping, his entire form a tremor of chilled bones and frayed hope.

“you’re so pathetic,” you say, the words flat and fond in their disdain, as you reach down and haul him inside by the collar, water sluicing across the threshold like an unholy tide, his gasp a shattered prayer against the sudden warmth. 

he collapses at your feet in the foyer, a puddle of soaked surrender, but his eyes, fever-bright, snot-streaked, worship-wrecked, never leave yours, drinking you in like absolution. 

water spreads across the tiles in a dark, accusing stain, seeping into the grout like his desperation into every crack of your patience. he’s shaking, violent tremors that rattle his frame, but he says nothing, just stares up with that hollow plea, lips parted on a breath that’s more gasp than air.

annoyance coils tight in your gut, sharp as the chill gusting from the cracked door. 

“you’re dripping all over my floors,” you bite out, voice laced with ice that makes him flinch, his body curling inward like a kicked thing. 

he shrinks further, shoulders hunching as if your tone alone could fold him smaller, and it almost does, his knees drawing up in a futile bid to contain the mess he’s made.

“stop shaking like a little bitch and do something about this unsightly mess,” you say, the words landing like slaps, each one stripping another layer from his fraying edges. 

he doesn’t move toward the bathroom down the hall, where towels and dry clothes wait like forgotten mercy, no, he drags himself closer instead, inching across the wet tiles on trembling palms, the puddle trailing him like a shameful tail.

“god, do i have to spell everything out for you?” you drawl, eyebrow arching in mock patience, but he shakes his head, frantic and small, dark hair flopping wet against his forehead. 

his voice cracks through the silence then, raw and threaded with salt. 

“take me back. let me be your boyfriend again, then i’ll go and change.”

“no,” you say plainly, eyebrow still cocked, unamused at the audacity blooming in his ruined face, like a weed pushing through concrete. 

it’s almost cute, if it weren’t so tiresome, the way he clings to titles like they’re lifelines.

“but-but. i-i,” he stammers, and there they come again, the tears, spilling fresh down his already flushed cheeks like the rain sluicing from the eaves outside. they carve hot paths through the grime of rain and snot, dripping off his chin to join the floor’s growing lake.

“but what?” you prompt, voice flat as a blade, stepping just close enough that he has to crane his neck to meet your gaze, vulnerability twisting him tighter.

he folds over himself, as he always did, slow crumple, clutching at his sternum like the organ beneath has turned traitor, fingers pressing so hard into the sodden fabric of his shirt you can see the pale outline of bone beneath, knuckles blanching white as bone china. 

for a split second, you almost buy into it and feel remorse, the theater of it, how he might shatter right there, ribs splintering like dry twigs, lungs collapsing in a wet wheeze, all because you won’t hand him the scraps of what he broke. but then the noise erupts, that awful wet sob ripping from his throat, and you roll your eyes, the spell cracking under the weight of its own excess. dramatic. pathetic. always performing for an audience of one.

“please,” he gasps, saliva catching thick in his throat, mangling the words into something choked and desperate. 

“it hurts. it hurts so much.”

“i can’t-i can’t breathe without you.” his face is a ruin now, lashes spiked black with tears, nose running unchecked in a glistening trail, spit pooling at the corners of his mouth like shameful punctuation. 

he doesn’t wipe it away, doesn’t dare break the pose, just crumples further, chest heaving in ragged pulls, the word spilling from him like blood from a fresh cut. need. need. need. it echoes off the walls, a mantra turned dirge, each repetition dragging the air heavier, weighting the room until it presses against your skin.

the sheer desperation in his voice has heft, a gravity that tugs at the edges of everything, but it only grates, a dull file against your nerves. you watch him shake and blubber on your floor, hands scrabbling at his chest like the pain might claw free and leave him hollowed out, a shell for you to kick aside.

he keels forward again, hands clawing at his shirt above his sternum, breath a ragged, metallic rasp that tastes like copper on your tongue for the briefest beat, a flicker you smother before it warms. his knuckles press white into fabric, nails digging crescent moons into his own skin through the cloth, and he repeats it like a wound flayed open: “i need you. i need you. i need you.” 

the words puddle there on the tiles, useless as the water around him, soaking into nothing.

“i already told you,” you say, slow and flat, the way you’d correct a child for repeating a lie. “i gave you my answer. nothing has changed.”

he looks up at you with a face saturated in grief, as if the rawness there should buy him mercy, his mouth trembling on the edge of another plea.

 “please,” he gasps, useless flares of hope lighting his eyes like dying embers. “don’t-don’t send me away. i-i can’t,”

“get upstairs and change,” you snap, because there are rules, and you like them carved in stone, obeyed without question. “or get the hell out. your choice.”

a hiccup of a laugh escapes him, brittle and broken, more sob than sound. 

“i’m not leaving. i-i won’t leave your side.” the declaration is fierce and small, a spark in the wet dark, as he clutches at the throw blanket draped loose over the nearby chair like it’s a totem, fingers twisting into the wool as if it could bind him here. 

“i promise. i’ll stay. i’ll-“

you watch, annoyance thinning you to tissue paper’s edge. the way he insists is the rot at the core of him, propping up his crumbling frame like a toddler defying sleep, all bluster and no spine. 

you step closer, and the scent hits you full, wet fabric heavy with salt and defeat, he smells like apology curdled into ruin, sharp and cloying. your hand shoots out, yanking the blanket down from around his shoulders like stripping a beggar of his rags, the wool whispering free in a tangle at his feet.

“change upstairs or leave. now. and stop clutching your chest like you’re having a fucking seizure. it’s childish.”

he shakes his head, tears streaking fresh tracks through the rain-slick on his face, snot darkening the skin beside his lip into a smeared shadow. 

“n-n-no. i’m not going anywhere.” his voice is a pinched wire, frayed to breaking. 

“not without you. i-i’ll die without you. you don’t understand.”

the gravity of his words would be laughable, a cheap stage trick, if it weren’t so sincere, etched bone-deep into the quiver of his chin, the way his eyes plead like open wounds. 

“you don’t listen” you say, voice dropping low, deliberate.

 each insult falls measured, a slow poison dripped into his veins. “you’re pathetic. you’re needy. you were boring in bed and you still are. you’re a selfish little brat that doesn’t understand you’ll never be able to please me.”

the words land like lashes, and he recoils with each one, body folding tighter, but his eyes stay locked on yours, glassy with that fevered worship, drinking down the venom like it’s the only sustenance left. 

it’s exquisite, the way he leans into the hurt, convinces himself it’s love because anything is better than the void of your absence. trauma’s cruel weave, binding him tighter with every knot you pull. and you? you’ll tug until he snaps, or begs pretty enough to earn a momentary stay. because his unraveling is your favorite art, his pain the brush that fills your emptiest hours.

“now,” you add, voice silk over steel, pointing toward the stairs with a lazy flick of your wrist, 

“upstairs. strip. shower. and if you’re very, very good, maybe i’ll let you try proving me wrong.” 

his breath hitches, a spark of desperate hope flaring in the wreck of him, and he scrambles up on unsteady legs, water sheeting off him in rivulets as he stumbles after you, a loyal shadow trailing its own storm. you lead him up, the creak of the stairs a metronome to his ragged breaths, and by the time you reach the bathroom door, he’s trembling anew, not from cold but from the precipice you’ve dangled him over.

“clothes off, the trail of water you’re leaving is starting piss me off,”you command, leaning against the sink as steam begins to fog the mirror from the running water, your robe slipping open just enough to tease. 

he fumbles with the hem of his shirt, fingers clumsy and pruned, peeling the wet fabric away to reveal skin goose-pimpled and flushed, ribs stark under the hollows you’ve carved into him. his joggers follow, pooling at his ankles with a sodden slap, and there he stands, exposed and aching, cock half-hard already from the mere promise of your gaze, twitching like it remembers your disdain too well.

“get in then, or do you suddenly not remember how to shower,” you say, nodding to the shower, and he steps under the spray with a hiss, water sluicing pink from his cheeks as he scrubs at himself like ritual cleansing might make him worthy. 

you watch from the doorway, arms crossed, letting the heat bloom in your chest as his hands move over slick skin, desperate efficiency in every stroke. you linger a moment longer, letting the heat of the room settle around you, then turn to leave, anticipating the stretch of your bed, the way his desperation might play out later if he proves himself. but his voice stops you, a ragged plea cutting through the hiss of the water. 

“please, don’t go,” he whispers, voice breaking as he steps forward, water dripping from his hair onto the tiles. 

his hand reaches out, hovering near your arm, not daring to touch. “don’t leave me here alone. i need to know you won’t run away. please.”

his eyes are wide, lashes clumped with tears and steam, face a raw canvas of need as he stands there, towel clutched forgotten in one hand, body trembling under the weight of his own fragility. you pause, half-turned, considering the tremble in his voice, the way it hooks into the quiet like a plea for tethering. with a sigh, you pivot back, leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed as the steam fogs the air between you.

“fine,” you say, voice low and edged with impatience. “i’ll stay. but you better make it quick. and don’t expect me to hold your hand through it.” 

his breath hitches, a shuddering relief, and he nods frantically, stepping into the shower with a hiss, water cascading over him as he scrubs at himself with desperate efficiency. it’s almost tender, the way he performs for you, eyes darting to check your approval, but tenderness has no place here. not when his obsession is your leash, his need the chain you rattle to keep him close.

you emerge from the bathroom first, the steam clinging to your skin like a lover’s reluctant goodbye, robe loose and whispering against your thighs as you pad into the bedroom. the air here is cooler, sharper, carrying the faint vanilla from the candle you lit earlier, a mocking sweetness that doesn’t touch the tension coiling in your gut. 

donghyuck follows a beat later, towel slung low on his hips, water still beading on his shoulders and tracing lazy paths down the lean ridges of his chest, the new muscle he’s carved into himself from endless gym hours gleaming under the low light. he’s not fully dry, droplets scattering onto the rug with each step, but he doesn’t care, doesn’t pause to grab the sweats folded on the dresser. his eyes are fixed on you, dark and ravenous, that fragile mask from downstairs shattered into something hungrier, more insistent.

he doesn’t wait. the second you’re within reach, his hands are on you, damp palms sliding up your arms with a grip that’s firm, almost bruising, backing you toward the bed in a rush of momentum that catches you off guard. his breath fans hot against your neck, ragged and uneven, carrying the clean bite of soap undercut by that raw, animal edge of him, all salt and need. 

“let me show you,” he murmurs, voice low and wrecked, lips brushing your collarbone as he presses closer, body heat seeping through the thin barrier of your robe. “i learned… watched everything. for you. please, y/n, let me make it good this time.”

“get changed first, you freak,” you manage, the words half-lost in a huff as you try to twist away, but he’s not listening, too far gone in the haze of his own desperation, hands roaming insistent now, one fisting the tie of your robe while the other pins your hip to the mattress edge. 

it’s a reminder, sharp and unwelcome, that he’s not as breakable as he used to be, not when lust floods him like this, turning the sniveling boy from the foyer into something feral, hands holding you down with a strength born from punishing reps, all to chase the ghost of your approval. the robe parts under his tug, silk whispering free to pool at your elbows, baring the black lace lingerie beneath, the sheer cups hugging your breasts, the garters framing your thighs like a taunt he can’t ignore.

he groans at the sight, a low, guttural sound that vibrates through his chest into yours, knees hitting the floor as he sinks between your legs, towing you down onto the bed with him. the mattress dips under your weight, sheets cool against your back, but his hands are fire, spreading your thighs wide, calluses rough from weights scraping your skin in a way that sends a traitorous spark up your spine. 

he’s worshipful in his frenzy, lips trailing sloppy kisses along your inner thigh, teeth grazing just hard enough to mark without breaking skin, tongue darting out to taste the salt there like it’s holy. 

“you’re so beautiful,” he breathes, voice muffled against your flesh, eyes flicking up to yours glassy with adoration, pupils blown wide. “need to taste you. need to make you feel it.”

you prop yourself up on your elbows, robe forgotten in a tangle at your sides, watching him with that cool detachment that makes his breath stutter. no guidance from you, no softening the edges; let him flail, let the inexperience bleed through in his hesitant laps, the way his tongue flattens too broad at first, exploratory swipes that miss the rhythm, chasing folds without finesse. 

he’s desperate, yes, mouth hot and wet, saliva slicking your skin in messy trails that drip down to the sheets, but it’s clumsy, overeager, his nose bumping your clit too hard one second, then veering too low the next, chasing shadows of what he thinks you want from those endless hours buried in porn tabs and technique videos. his hands tremble on your thighs, fingers digging in crescents that bloom red, holding you open like a gift he doesn’t deserve, whimpers humming against you each time he surfaces for air, lips shiny and swollen.

it’s slow going, his pace tentative, like he’s mapping uncharted territory with a reverence that borders on reverence gone wrong, and boredom creeps in fast, a yawn splitting your jaw wide, unhidden and unapologetic, the sound lazy and echoing in the quiet room. 

you don’t bother stifling it, letting it hang there like judgment, your hand drifting to the nightstand for your phone, thumb swiping the screen alive just as he pulls back a fraction, gasping wetly, chin glistening with you and spit, eyes searching yours for that spark of approval that isn’t there.

“what, what are you doing?” his voice cracks, whine threading through it like a fracture, face crumpling as he hovers, breath ghosting your core in shallow pants, the damp heat of him teasing without delivering.

“trying to find someone to do it correctly,” you say, eyes fixed on the glow of contacts scrolling under your thumb, voice flat and bored, each word a deliberate cut. “finish this poor job you’ve started.”

his sob chokes out, raw and wet, but you keep going, scrolling past names like they’re options on a menu.

“i wonder if jaemin is free?” the name drops casual, a grenade in the space between you, and he cries out, a broken keen that twists his face, head shaking frantic against your thigh, dark hair tickling your skin. 

jaemin, the one who unraveled everything, the brown-haired shadow you let between your legs while donghyuck watched the fallout, those grainy sex tapes landing in his dms like knives, captions searing: ‘how to properly please your girl.’ 

the one who sparked this gym fixation, donghyuck’s body remade in frantic bids to bulk up, to sharpen edges, to become man enough, muscular enough, anything to eclipse the memory of jaemin’s easy confidence, his taunting prowess that left you arched and spent in ways donghyuck never could.

“no,” he wails, the word mangled through tears, snot bubbling fresh at his lip as he dives back in like a man possessed, mouth sealing over you with a suction that borders on bruise, tongue plunging deep now, curling insistent against your walls in a rhythm that’s transformed, fervent and filthy. 

gone is the hesitation, replaced by worship turned weapon, his lips sucking your clit between them with a wet pop that echoes obscene, teeth grazing just enough to spark lightning up your spine, then soothing with broad, flat laps that drag through your folds, gathering slick and spit in a messy froth that coats his chin, drips down his neck in shiny rivulets. the sounds are pornographic, slurps and smacks filling the room, his moans vibrating deep into your core like a bassline you feel in your bones, desperate hums that plead without words, each one a prayer to your pleasure.

it’s toe-curling now, eye-rolling bliss, his inexperience burned away in the fire of rivalry, leaving only raw, unfiltered lust, tongue flicking your clit in tight, rapid circles that make your hips buck involuntary, thighs clamping around his ears like a vice he leans into, nose grinding firm against you for leverage, the bridge slick and flushed red from friction. 

sensations layer vivid, overwhelming: the heat of his mouth a furnace against your cool skin, wet and unrelenting, saliva mixing with your arousal in a slick glide that eases his tongue deeper, probing spots that make stars burst behind your lids; the scrape of his stubble rasping your inner thighs raw, a delicious burn that grounds the float of it

fingers join the assault, two at first, thick and insistent, curling to hook that spongy spot inside with a precision born from nights of fevered study, scissoring slow to stretch you open, the wet schlick of it obscene, mingling with the drip of his own tears as they spill hot down your thighs. he adds a third, knuckles brushing your walls in a burn that’s almost too much, too full, pumping now in shallow thrusts that match the buck of your hips, chasing the clench of your muscles around him like it’s absolution.

it’s overwhelming, the shift from fumbling to this, a tidal pull that drags you under despite yourself, heat blooming vicious low in your belly, spreading like spilled ink through your veins. you try to hold it back, lips clamped tight to stifle the moan building in your throat, refusing to give him the satisfaction, to let him hear how close he’s worming to erasing that old ache. 

let him think he’s still failing, let the doubt gnaw at him even as his tongue flattens perfectly against your clit, sucking with a hollow-cheeked pull that sends sparks skittering up your spine, thighs quaking involuntary around his ears.

but god, it’s hard to contain, the pleasure coiling tighter with every desperate lap, every curl of his fingers that hits just right, pressure building like a storm front you can’t outrun. a whimper escapes first, traitorous and soft, bitten back between your teeth, but he hears it, feels it in the twitch of your hips, and it spurs him feral, mouth working harder, tongue flicking rapid now in tight, unyielding circles that make your vision blur at the edges, toes curling into the mattress like claws. 

“fuck, hyuck,” the name slips out then, a moan laced with reluctant surrender, low and breathy, and it’s gasoline on his fire, his groan rumbling deep against you, vibrations that pulse straight to your core, hips bucking wild as he follows your rhythm, nose grinding firm into your clit for leverage, not surfacing once for air, face a glistening ruin of your juices and his tears, breathing you in like oxygen, drowning in the flood of it.

“mm, right there,” you gasp, the praise dragged unwilling from your lips, small and edged but enough to shatter him further, his pace turning rabid, tongue delving deeper, lips sealing vacuum-tight to suckle with a fervor that borders on pain-pleasure, fingers thrusting crooked to stroke that ridge inside relentless, coaxing the coil to snap. 

it feels like unraveling, sensations layering vivid and merciless: the wet heat of his mouth a constant siege, enveloping you whole; the drag of his tongue textured and insistent, tracing every ridge and fold with a devotion that borders on madness; the stretch of his fingers, full and unyielding, walls fluttering greedy around the intrusion, pulling him in as slick gushes hot to ease the way. your back arches, hips grinding down to smother him, chasing the friction that builds electric under your skin, breaths turning to pants, a low keen building in your chest you can’t swallow anymore.

“feels so good,” you murmur, voice fracturing on the edge of it, and he whines against you, pathetic and fervent, the sound muffled in your folds as he redoubles, tongue lashing faster, following every roll of your hips with instinctive sync, face dripping obscene now, chin slick and shining, lashes clumped wet as tears mingle with the mess, but he doesn’t falter, doesn’t breathe, just devours like your pleasure is the only god he’ll ever kneel for. 

the pressure crests vicious, a white-hot knot pulling taut in your gut, thighs clamping his head in a vise as you teeter, 

“i’m close, hyuck, fuck, don’t stop,” the words spilling desperate, praise turning command, and it breaks him open, his thrusts turning sloppy-wet, mouth sucking greedy at your clit while his free hand claws your thigh, anchoring you down as if you might float away without him.

it shatters then, orgasm crashing like a wave breaking bone, your body convulsing in a violent arch, a wail tearing from your throat raw and unhinged, walls clamping vise-tight around his fingers in pulsing waves that milk him deeper.

the dam bursts and you squirt, hot and forceful, a gush that floods his mouth, arcs clear to soak his chest in messy spurts, drenching his skin in glistening sheets that run rivulets down his sternum, pooling in the hollow of his collarbone. 

the release is shuddering, endless, your thighs quaking around him, core spasming in aftershocks that draw choked whimpers from your lips, oversensitive sparks firing with every lap of his tongue as he drinks it down, mesmerized, eyes glassy and locked on yours through the haze, not pulling back but diving deeper, sucking the excess with fervent pulls that wring every last quiver from you, determined to chase another, to flood him again until he’s proven, until jaemin’s shadow dissolves in the salt of your ruin.

the air hangs heavy, thick with the musk of sex and the sharp tang of your release, the room a battlefield of damp sheets and scattered breaths. donghyuck kneels between your trembling thighs, face a glistening mask of devotion, your juices coating his skin in a sheen that drips from his jaw, streaks his chest, evidence of his triumph etched into every shuddering line of him. he’s gone now, lost in a trance, eyes dark and unblinking, locked on the way your pussy clenches and unclenches around nothing, the aftershocks rippling through you like echoes of his victory. your skin flushes a deep rose, heat radiating from your core where legs still shake, muscles quivering with the strain of release, thighs slick and glistening under the low light, a canvas of his obsession laid bare.

he stares, transfixed, the sight of your squirt—how it arced and flooded him, soaking the bed, marking him like a brand—burning into his mind, a loop he can’t escape. it’s proof, tangible and messy, of the good job he did, a trophy he’ll chase until he’s hollowed out from it. his breath comes in shallow pants, pupils blown wide, a predator’s glint sharpening his gaze as he tells himself he won’t leave, not until he’s made you do it again, and again, until the room drowns in you, until jaemin’s ghost is a distant smear under the weight of his own making.

“how many times?” his voice cuts through the haze, low and rough, edged with a hunger that scrapes your nerves raw.

“hmm?” you hum, mind still adrift in the afterglow, body lax and buzzing, words sluggish as you blink down at him, trying to anchor yourself.

“how many times did he make you squirt?” the question spills urgent, a demand wrapped in jealousy, his hands tightening on your thighs, fingers digging into the soft flesh like he’s staking a claim.

“twice,” you murmur, voice soft but steady, letting the admission hang, watching the way it twists him tighter, a coil ready to snap.

his eyes darken further, a storm brewing behind them, lips curling into a vow as he leans closer, breath hot against your oversensitive skin. 

“let me make that three tonight, baby.” the words are a promise, a challenge, his tongue darting out to taste the lingering slick on his lips, already shifting to settle deeper between your legs, hands spreading you wider as if preparing to worship at an altar he’s only just begun to understand.