And suddenly, I was alone. I had nowhere to turn. And it dawned on me that I was going to have to face this all by myself. And the door opened and Headmaster Portley walked in to find me wearing a bandit mask in the middle of his bedroom, my hands filled with his wife’s knickers and his most expensive bottle of Brandy. And… and your friends just left you there? It was my fault, really. It was greedy to go back for the liquor. They broke a few switches on me, but I was the school hero.














