This is brills!

(It's a home remedy for a migraine-in-progress that happens to work better than pills for me.)

Deliberate brainfreeze is surprisingly difficult to accomplish--both in the figuring out a reliable strategy sense and in the overcoming the flinch response sense.

Every time do this, I feel a strong desire to start a toxic ingroup for people who do this specific unpleasant thing.

It’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of

like the way he asked "what is nur-ate-iv?" makes me think man TRULY was not catching all of the words getting tossed at him so fast the second his eyes were even a LITTLE open. like he wasn't asking "what story did you come up with?" he's asking "what word are you even saying to me right now?" man got like 0.2 seconds to be like "oh i'm awake now?" before he was getting PELTED with english because shane had a forty step plan that couldn't wait like. three more hours.

in my heart, shane sleeps like a ROCK and is also non-functional if his sleep schedule is disrupted

either ilya is completely mia because he went to lay down with whatever kiddo came to get him and then fell asleep in their bed without meaning to, or shane wakes up to little feet pushing into his kidney or a little fist tucked under his arm or a kiddo sprawled sideways over him AND ilya in a way that canNOT be comfortable

req'd by @ebonydraygon

squashing as we speak

from the grave, chapter 1 [Link]

Written by @antichrists-plus1 with illustration by @edmcmayonnaise

It's dead quiet in the room as Charles searches for something less horrifying to distract himself with. So quiet that he notices the faint drag of a wooden frame. He turns, and catches the corpse he just dug up trying to escape out the window. Charles screams.

Working as a body snatcher in the early 19th century, Charles digs up the body of a familiar boy, who he discovers may not be as dead as he seems.

Eridian Duet

Ilya gets pulled for a live post-game media scrum, and instead of being asked about the two goals he scored or how cohesively their team played that day, he gets asked the umpteenth question by some smarmy sports reporter about his and Shane’s relationship, with thinly-veiled jabs about how having two married queer players on their team must be bad for their locker room.

And Ilya loves being able to openly talk about Shane and their relationship, but he’s so sick of this offensive line of questioning. So instead he just makes his innocent-confused-puppydog face and replies in rapid-fire Russian. The reporter is thrown off and repeats his question, but Ilya just replies in Russian again, going on and on until the reporter gets flustered and gives up.

Later when the internet translates what he said, it’s something along the lines of, “I don’t understand such idiotic English questions, but if the sports reporter wants to ask questions about the sport he’s paid to report, I can answer those,” and then it’s just him praising his teammates on how well they’ve been playing.

RATED: G | WC: 4.8K | STATUS: COMPLETE

They’d had it planned out for at least two months. Well, Shane had, at least. His plan made the most sense: His parents were in Ottawa. They could drive, they had room in the house, and they loved Ilya.

Ilya had pushed back. He could drive. He had a big, empty house near the surgery. And he loved David and Yuna, but he could take care of himself.

They had argued back and forth for two full weeks, neither willing to admit defeat. But the dentist had been pretty fucking clear that the anaesthetic would be strong, so Ilya wouldn’t be able to drive himself anywhere, or even look after himself, for at least a day. Two days, in some cases, and he’d have pain and swelling for up to two weeks.