*burning damage tick*

Joe Hills with the banhammer and sickle standing on the banks of the hermitcraft whitelist ferrying guests over to the server like Charon, only to push them in once the event is over and their crossing fee is spent. LDShadowlady and Dotdotdash sneaking onto the server through Orpheus' door (husband's login)

one must imagine sisyphus fucking the boulder

I think it’s normal for people to be mad at each other sometimes even if they’re close friends or family or intimate with each other. Like I think that’s a normal and healthy part of relationships that can happen sometimes

“Why were you on Mad At Me island” because at the time I was mad at you and yet our friendship has weathered that without trouble

I went to Mad At You island because my feelings are my problem. I needed to stomp down the beach until I could sit and watch the sunrise. I built a sandcastle and did some thinking. Then I boarded the good ship You Matter To Me and sailed it all the way to meet you on the Let’s Talk Shore of I Love You Island.

my favoritest thing in hermitcraft fanfiction is when it takes place in a pseudo-minecraft fantasy realm but the hermits are still sometimes described with their nationalities. like okay this is a world where magic exists and you can respawn after you die and the entirety of reality sometimes gets new features added and new worlds can be created out of thin air, each with their own accompanying otherworldly pocket dimensions, and some people have special admin powers that allow them to alter the fabric of reality, and gods/cosmic horror monsters/a weird cult called the Watchers may or may not inhabit the spaces in between existence. also Canada exists. Canada exists here and we are not going to address it

Every time I see this I lose my marbles I love it so much. "For some reason I yelled who is in here as I was falling" is the point where my soul leaves my body. God I love.

i mean this is a genuine issue (see john oliver's video on wild hogs) but this is an absolutely hilarious way to sell it. imagine having to take this photo.

As is so frequently the case im also thinking about werewolves who work in healthcare. Paramedic uniform with MEDICAL ALERT SERVICE DOG on the back.

This would be funny in multiple ways. Imagining her in human form refusing to elaborate on why her jacket says that. Coffee break and a dog biscuit. Alternatively imagining her in full dog mode very determinedly going through the first aid kit with her nose and flinging the appropriate wipes and bandages at the nearest person with thumbs

This huge dog trots up to you and hands you a little pamphlet saying hello im your nurse today we'll be doing a diabetes screening and you're like oh cute gimmick I know that's a thing you can train service dogs to do. Then two days later your very much human nurse is talking to you like you've already met and you're like girl this is our first encounter what are you talking about

Youre in the waiting room and a passing doctor takes a deep breath and immediately goes awh man okay sit down you're gonna need seizure meds in a minute

There's so many horror games about having to try to weed out and deal with inhuman imposters, but I want one where the script is flipped. You are something inhuman, you are an imposter, and if you want to survive you have to blend into a world that is trying to hunt you down and destroy you. You aren't human, but you must masquerade as one and infiltrate their world, or you will die.

the idea that every summer will be as hot if not hotter than this for the rest of my life is unbearable i need to (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health) murder an oil executive