the joke's on you

Bruce Wayne Pleads City Yet Again To Stop Gerrymandering: “This might be what drives me to buy myself a fucking politician like everyone else in my social class,” says the philanthropist.

Scarecrow Gives Up Fear Toxin, Saying 2020 Alone Is Enough For Him To Continue His Studies

CDC Warns Joker Safe Gas Masks Filter Gas Particulates, Not Viruses. Bruce Wayne Asks For 2 Weeks

I know that the “billionaire playboy” look is important to B’s look but honestly if the joker or smthn tried to kill someone at a gala and Bruce fuckin decked him everyone would probably just be like “damn these Gotham boys are just Like That huh”

Too true, the actual reason nobody makes Bruce Wayne the Batman seriously is because the entirety of Gotham is ridiculous and Like That

I

when Clark read this quote he had to go lie down for an hour

At this point, I’m inclined to believe that Gotham City is less New York and more Philadelphia, Baltimore, or Detroit. Gotham City’s general population has such huge “fuck around and find out” vibes.

This is one criminally underrated Batman villain.

I remember this episode fucked me up a a kid. 

And man, do I wish we could see this Batman again: the Batman that consoles his villains, because the majority (if not all) of them are mentally ill people. And Batman knows this and wants them healthy again, not punished and GOD definitely not dead.

Batman: The Animated Series The story of one fucked up, traumatized little boy, doing his best to help other fucked up traumatized people.

#this show is the only batcanon that matters to me #dc can burn everything else down but they’ll never pry the dcau from cold dead clawed hands

Batman needs become human again

everyone in gotham always wants to know who batman is but they never want to know how he is :/

He’s a grown man dressed as a bat. They know.

(Bruce Wayne voice) I’m Bruce Wayne, from Gotham City, I’m participating in Nailed It! because for years I’ve tried to learn how to bake to impress my father [cuts to old pic of baby Bruce trying to whisk in a bowl, wearing a crooked chef hat, Alfred trying to help him with a really loving look on his face], and- (someone in the background yells LIAR!!) (Bruce covers his face, the background music stops) fine I lost a bet to one of my kids and they thought it would be hilarious for me to participate because I’m terrible in the kitchen [cuts to picture of grown Bruce with a pan on fire, looking absolutely frantic, sad trombone sound] [the people behind the camera laugh]

#DCU#camera guy 1: how does he know what every suit design looks like? i haven’t seen him pull one reference. camera guy 2: [shrugs]

bruce wayne maintains a presence on all conspiracy theory boards with the screen name BruceWayneIsTheBatman and all his posts have titles like “BRUCE WAINE IS BAT-MAN INDISPUTABLE PROOF” and it’s just a picture of Bruce Wayne from the back next to a picture of Batman from behind and they both have the contours of their butt drawn on in a shitty MSPaint red line (note: Bruce is in a suit and Batman has a cape, neither of their butts are clearly discernible) and the quote “THE BUTTS MATCH!!! THE FACTS DON’T LIE!!!!!” and he makes at least three of these posts a day, and “Bruce Wayne is the Batman” becomes a meme a la “Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer” and he gets asked about it on a talk show and he laughs uproariously at the idea and Stephen Colbert just HAPPENS to have a batman mask under the desk and they do a bit together where Bruce Wayne puts on the mask and walks around saying things like “excuse me, bank robbers, can I perhaps offer you some money to stop you robbing this bank?” and “I say, cease and desist your criminal behavior or I’ll have my butler ask you to leave” and the audience is LOSING THEIR MINDS laughing at the idea of this pampered rich guy taking on the Joker on a bi-weekly basis and then anyone who suggests “Bruce Wayne is Batman” in earnest gets met with mocking “oh man do the butts match” comments

Joker finds out Bruce Wayne is the Batman and has an honest-to-god heart attack because How Dare. On his way into surgery he keeps murmuring “Bruce Wayne is the goddamn Batman” and and “No you don’t UNDERSTAND! Bruce Wayne is the goddamn BATMAN!” nobody believes him. On his way out of the hospital and back to Arkham Bruce is waiting for him and leans in close and whispers, “I’m username BruceWayneIsTheBatman too” and they have to take Joker back into the hospital and defibrillate him again.