ISLAM 101: AN INTRODUCTION TO HADITH: Part 16
Sila ar-Rahm (Observing Ties of Kinship): Part 3
e) Rights after Their Death
Making haste with regard to their burial.
Washing them in accordance with the requirements of the Sunnah. One must ensure that the individuals washing them are comprehensively knowledgeable about and skilled in this task.
Shrouding them in accordance with the Prophetic practice.
Obtaining their shroud through their lawful earnings.
Always entreating Allah for their forgiveness.
Personally placing them in the soil.
Performing a helpful service to those who dig the grave and workers at the cemetery.
Burying them among good and righteous people.
Giving in charity by their grave.
Supplicating at their graveside.
To recite the talking, or “prompting,” at the time of burial, instructing the deceased in the essentials of belief as to how to answer the interrogative angels. It is stated in a hadith:
“When one of you dies and you have settled the earth over him, let one of you stand at the head of his grave and then say: ‘O So-and-so, son of So-and-so [name of the mother]!’ For he will hear him even if he does not reply. Then let him say a second time: ‘O So-and-so, son of So-and-so [name of the mother]!’ Whereupon he will sit up (in his grave). Then let him say: ‘O So-and-so, son of So-and-so [name of the mother]!’ At this, the deceased will say: ‘Instruct me, and may Allah grant you mercy!’ Even if you cannot hear it. Then let him say: ‘Remember the state in which you left this world, which is your witnessing that there is no deity except Allah and that Muhammad is His servant and messenger; that you are pleased with Allah as your Lord, Islam as your religion, Muhammad as your Prophet, and the Qur’an as your book.’” (Daylami)
Carrying out their last will and testament. If their request contravenes the religion, it is not fulfilled.
Entreating Allah in their supplications after the Prayer and conveying the spiritual rewards to their spirits. A hadith states:
“If a person is undutiful to their parents but prays for their forgiveness and deliverance after their death, Allah will record them among those dutiful to their parents.” (Ibn Abi ad-Dunya)
Fasting on their behalf. It is again stated in hadith:
“No one should offer a Prayer or observe a Fast on behalf of another; however, they can feed (the needy) instead.” (Sunan an-Nasa’i) Someone came to the Prophet and asked, “O Messenger of Allah, my parents have died; is there any act left with which I may be dutiful to them?” Allah’s Messenger said, “There are four such things: supplication and asking for their forgiveness, fulfilling their promises, honoring their friends, and maintaining good relations with those of your relatives with whom your kinship is established only through them.” (Hakim)
Performing the Pilgrimage and sending them the rewards therein. According to the majority of scholars, undertaking the Pilgrimage on behalf of one’s parents is permissible. A hadith states:
“Whoever performs the Pilgrimage on behalf of his deceased parents, that Pilgrimage is accepted from both himself and his parents, and the souls of his parents are given the glad tidings of such.” (Dar al-Qutni)
Giving in charity on their behalf. As stated in a hadith:
“Why should one who gives in charity not convey its reward to the spirit of their deceased parents when both will be rewarded without the reward of the sender not being lessened in the slightest.” (Tabarani)
Visiting their graves and reciting the Qur’an:
“One who visits the grave of one or both of his parents sincerely with the hope of forgiveness will receive the reward equivalent to that of a Pilgrimage, and one who visits their graves often will have angels visiting his grave (after he passes away).” (Hakim)
Visiting their graves on Fridays:
“Whoever visits the grave of his parents, both or either of them, every Friday, Allah will forgive all of his sins and include him amongst those who are dutiful to their parents.” (Sunan at-Tirmidhi)
Honoring their friends. It is stated in a hadith,
“The finest act of goodness is that a person should treat kindly the loved ones of his father.” (Sahih Muslim)
Giving sadaqa al-fitr (the compulsory charity paid after the month of Ramadan) in their name, for the rewards to be bestowed upon them.
Offering a sacrifice on their behalf during the Festival of Sacrifice (Eid al-Adha).
Preparing their favorite foods and distributing them to the needy and, as such, pleasing their spirits.
Not speaking of their faults:
“Speak well of the dead; do not mention their shortcomings.” (Sunan at-Tirmidhi).
One must visit one’s parents and relatives, inquire after their welfare and make them happy.
One must assist those who are in difficulty or need.
Ties must never be severed with one’s relatives.
One who forsakes their relatives must not forget that they will be deprived of Divine Mercy and compassion.
The person most deserving of goodness and benevolence is the mother.
The person most worthy of honor, goodness, and obedience after the mother is the father.
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