༺♅༻

sitting anti-kink posters down in front of a wrestling match and explaining kayfabe to them with the patience of a preschool teacher

You see that one? He's called the "heel." He looks mean and says a lot of scary things, but it's not real and he's actually very nice. When he says "I'm going to break you in half" you don't have to be scared because it's pretend. These two talked about this beforehand, and now they're playing pretend together. Can you think of any other situations that might be like this?

oh holy shit

My mom just said she thinks men are going crazy nowadays bc they have less gay sex now than they did in ancient times lool. She said she has a feeling it used to just be something guys did n moved on n now it’s a big deal for no reason. And I’m listening along like girl tumblr would love you

Sorry man. You are too weird and unpleasant. Can you please never talk to anyone again and starve to death in a small cell? Thank you.

this meeting could've been a koan about futility

call my pussy a truffle the way your hog is hunting it down through the bush

[trying to show my left-handed friend I'm a good ally] yeah it surprised me a lot how much anti-left-handed language is still floating around. it's honestly kind of sinis... sorry, I didn't mean that, I wasn't trying to be passive aggressive or underhanded or....... I try so hard.anfi always,mess up erverythijgg..

btw last night I had a dream that I was being chased by a killer. as he finally caught me I saw he had a rainbow bracelet so I said “wait you’re gay?” and he replied “it’s diverse”. then he murdered me

i am that t girl with the clocky jawline and terrible posture who will take care of you forever . That's me