Loser Central

girl something good has to happen at some point

i actually never ever want AO3 to be censored bc nothing is more fun than reading the tags on a fic and going “huh. didn’t know there was a market for that.”

i love watching tv and making the worst observations... watching the simpsons all of my thoughts r like: it was very unkind of bart to trick his teacher like that but oh well i guess he'll learn someday. if only he had a better home environment

Dear video essay creators. A video analysis is when you analyze a piece of media. No no look at me. A summary, no matter how thorough, is not an analysis. An analysis requires you to draw conclusions about the media such as authorial intent, real-world parallels, discussion about themes/worldbuilding/character motivation, and so much more. You have to stop summarizing something and saying that’s analysis. The Gaylors are doing more critical analysis than you. Is that who you want to lose to? The gaylors?

Me *leaves a pile of assorted jorts in the woods*: for the werewolves

If you’re always “putting yourself first” and “protecting your energy” there will be absolutely nothing interesting that happens in your life whatsoever. The only way you have a life that’s interesting to live is by getting caught up in stupid shit. You people are just scared of others contaminating your narcissistic sense of selfhood

i'm literally an artist who doesnt create anything. no i can't explain it to you

the thing is you are going to get older and you are going to die. you don't have unlimited time on earth. you have to spend all your time on your phone now

me in my animal crossing house after that fox has sold me another fake painting

"I can never get it tasting like my mom used to make" yeah, because your mom had a giant Costco-size bottle of a specific pre-mixed spice blend that was discontinued by its manufacturer in 1998 and spent your entire childhood putting it in every meal to use the stupid thing up faster – she doesn't know how to replicate it any more than you do.

The tragedy of culinary nostalgia is that most of the time, the flavours of your childhood aren't memories of lost secret recipes – they're the irreplicable accidents of folks tossing whatever happened to be cheap and available into the pot, and there are no recipes to recover because the people doing the cooking never knew them.

bro doesnt even have the jennies (certain je ne sais quois)