GET IN LOSERS WE'RE GOING HYPERFIXATING

remember when garthy obrien said that fabians a spitting image of his mom? i think about this a lot

(cool lighting ref / song)

aaoauughhhaghhh.....

Please look at the baby chinchilla from work. Look at as much of it you can see without a microscope. Please PLEASE I need people to see it's it's such a THING

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So ok look. The point is not the flared leg by itself. These cannot be yoga pants. These are, and you have to understand this if you are too young to have worn them, BLUE JEANS. And this was the last years before all jeans were 70% spandex.

They were denim, and they weren't bell bottoms. They hung loose from the knee in a way that would make a wizard envious. We all walked around like we were wearing hakama. And they dragged on the ground. That was important. Ragged cuffs. If your jeans weren't so long that they had ratty cuffs, they were embarrassingly short.

And the thing about denim is that it's a twill weave and it's cotton. So not only does it hold a lot of water, it wicks. Walking around in these suckers on a wet day could get you wet to the knees even if you never stepped in a puddle.

Then you'd go inside and take off your shoes and try to avoid letting your freezing, wet, filthy pant legs touch your skin.

Ima need the young people to look up the proper names for their pant cuts, because I don't think they MAKE yoga pants with bell bottom cuts.

However big you think bell bottoms are, you are wrong. These were all Bootcut or Flares. I know this because I wore them, and I look for bootcut/flare ALWAYS because they flatter my figure the best. As they are not very in fashion right now, this is difficult.

I also still have to roll up the ends of said pants because I am not tall enough for the size jeans I have to get, and as most medium to short but quite fat peop know, for some reason the clothing companies decide if the waist is bigger, the leg needs to be taller, and scale them as such. So we all have jeans this fucking long all the time.

However they are made with elastic materials now, so no, they do not wick the same way (thankfully).

Anyway have a quick guide:

This shit is Bootleg and Flare. Difference is subtle. Bootlegs are usually the most conservative, closest to the leg, Flares will hug to the knee and then... well... flare. And the flare can get really big and wavey, but it's still a flare if it cinches at the knee.

first 2 count as Bootcut (yeah even the one with the little split), third is Flare, fourth is a more conservative Flare but could probably get labelled Bootcut.

AND THIS

IS BELLBOTTOMS.