They Call Me Dork

hey so anyone else just, feel thin. sort of stretched. like butter scraped over too much bread. like you need a holiday. a very long holiday. and you don't expect you shall return? or is that just me and bilbo baggins

I hate when people ask me how long it took me to crochet something I’ve made. Frankly, that’s none of my business. I put the yarn on the hook and worked on it whenever the spirit happened to take me to and then one day it was done. How long that process took is between the yarn and god; I want no part of it.

hi guys. everything feels so bad and i want to scream and cry. but i will keep seeking joy anyway. love you bye

actually the reveal that there was no timeskip at all is hysterical. milchick really spent that whole weekend going all over town firing people, hiring people, putting together insane fruit baskets, and serving cunt in his motorcycle helmet. then at the orders of the board he had to very quickly fire the people he hired, rehire the people he fired, commission an oil painting for the severed floor lobby, redecorate the break room, and put together an award-winning claymation corporate apology video designed to showcase the new innie perks and reforms that don't exist as well as that one time helena eagan's innie sucked face with the innie whose outie his ex-boss is obsessed with. where is HIS waffle party

I see the price of groceries and my leitmotif changes to minor key