The one where Joe Hills is in a sitcom in which multiple characters are having wild adventures off camera and appear at his farm every so often with random anecdotes and usually starving
(From Joe Hills's "HermitCraft 9 ep 1: Hermits Helping Chaos", inspired by this post by @korasonata)
Transcript under the cut
[Transcript]
Joe Hills: As people die off, this is gonna be more and more necessary.
Cleo: (laughs) Oh, oh! Speaking of that: look!
(Cleo puts on Scar head)
Joe: Oh my god!
(cut)
Joe: One of the things that I haven't done any of is farming or building a perimeter.
in-game chat: "GoodTimeWithScar fell from a high place"
Cleo: You're all right, Scar?
(cut)
in-game chat: "GoodTimeWithScar fell from a high place"
Pearl: Where has everybody gone to? What the heck!
(Scar laugh, getting closer)
bdubs: Wait, how did everybody go to sleep so fast!?
Scar: Oh, Joe, can I have some of these? I've died so many times and lost so many of my things.
(cut)
Joe: Wait do I have a moustache?
Cleo: You do have a moustache.
Joe: Oh I have a moustache! I forgot!
(cut)
in-game chat: "GoodTimeWithScar was slain by Grian"
tfc (maybe?): ...community garden.
Joe: yeah, there's...
Scar: Cleo! They stole my mouton now!
Cleo: They stole your mouton? Since when do you have... All I've got is kelp!
Scar: I'm gonna deplete this chest very quickly.
Joe: Bring things back when you get them.
Scar: Dude I love the moustache, Joe.
Joe: Thank you Scar.
(cut)
in-game chat: "PearlescentMoon was slain by Zombie"
Joe: Hey Pearl!
Cleo: Uh? Where's Pearl?
Joe: She's over there. Pearl, come over here!
Cleo: Do you need things?
Pearl: Uh...
Joe: Do you need a boat?
Pearl: It's okay, Impulse made like 20 boats. So I'll be alright.
Joe: Okay (cut) 'cause he's not here.
Pearl: Well, maybe...
Joe: So if you need to get back to him, you might need one of the boats.
(cut)
Scar: Hi Joe!
Joe: Hey Scar! You need tools, kelp, or anything?
Scar: I could use the sharpest sword you can ever lend me.
Joe: Uuuh... I've got an axe. It's not especially sharp. But, y'know, if you're just trying to hit Mumbo a few times...
Ren: Hello everybody! (cut)
Scar: They betrayed me, and I'm dumb enough to belive them that they're done betraying me, and I keep coming back.
(TFC: Creepy laugh off camera)
Ren: Okay.
Scar: That was the creepiest laugh I've ever heard in my life!
TFC: I'll have you know I practice that laugh! (laughs creepily again)
(cut)
Scar: Joe, you really gotta work on the weapons here. We need shields, TNT, multiple times of enchanted swords...
Joe: I'm only one man Scar! (cut) Go get that TNT!
(cut)
(Mumbo and Grian laughing, getting closer)
Mumbo: There's a high likelihood that he will revisit this area soon.
Grian: All I can see is (inaudible)
Mumbo: Oh, this could be a bit of an armada.
Tango (getting closer): Nyoom!
(cut)
Keralis: What- Look at you! What? You're being a savior again!
Joe: I do what I can!
(cut)
Tango: There's Scar!
Doc: Sorry, I misclicked. Misclicked!
Iskall: Hello!
(cut)
Iskall: I needed to eat!
Joe: Yeah, as long as you replant the extra seeds, take it!
(cut)
Joe: Here's some cooked salmon!
(cut)
Joe: So we've got a nice little Hermits Helping Hermits Community Resources Tent Here...
in-game chat: "falsesymmetry was impaled by Drowned"
(false appears in front of Joe)
Joe: ...it's not perfect.
false: No!
Joe: Oh no! false! You okay?
false: Oh, I died to a drowned!
Joe: Oh no!
false: I'm gonna go get my stuff!
Joe: Bye!
false: My stuff! (very faintly:) Aaah!
Joe: Okay. So, yeah, that's working.
[end transcript]
Joe Hills is the barkeep NPC that keeps hearing snippets of the DND party's adventures.














