indie.ninja

such insolence... guards? seize her! ...no. stop. not like that. you are doing it gay. why are you seizing her gay style

hey. dont cry. 566 california condors, okay? 369 free flying.[1] it's gonna be okay.

for the record, in 1987 there were 27. [2] things can get better.

HEY. DONT CRY. 607 CALIFORNIA CONDORS, OKAY? 392 FREE FLYING. [3]

i bet girls hated it in 1902 cuz you would constantly go on dates w guys who are working on an invention to present at the world fair

Have you ever considered that Sisyphus might've just been in for the love of the game? My bus driver hits the same curb every morning

feng shui sabotage by placing thousands of tiny ball bearings in a bag under your couch you won't see them but you'll feel the clutter

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

And when you looked back and only saw one H, it was Jesus H. Christ knowing what you suffered.