Things N' Shit

coke of cola is a health potion. pepsi is a mana potion

what’s graped soda

it’s fucking purple baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@chleborzoi

I don’t care what the Founding Fathers would have wanted, I don’t care if Jesus was a hippie or not, I don’t care what Marx prescribed. I can’t take living in a world where we’re all servants of long-dead men. You know what happens if you make a law the Founding Fathers wouldn’t like? Nothing, they’re dead and they’re never coming back. I’m genuinely envious of countries that can just make whatever laws they want without worrying about how 18th century agrarian noblemen would have seen it. Stop arguing that Jesus loved the poor too, what he loved or didn’t love is irrelevant, he doesn’t get a say in any of this. We could have a country that isn’t shackled to these ghosts if we collectively wanted to.

This is gorgeous.

He’s a corpse

he’s tired from smash bros let him rest

when you’re a kid and you’re feeling weird and detached and you fall asleep in the late afternoon with school clothes still on and you wake up and its dark and dinner is almost done and time feels like a thick jelly 

u ever eat something just cuz its carbs? like it doesnt even taste that good, ur stomach just Wants it?

Don’t get an exotic bird when you can get a chicken

Chickens make just as fun and comforting companions as parrots, if not more - and I currently care for both <3

if a vampire came into my house and tried to drain my blood. well i would simply say no thank you.

unless the vampire is hot of course, in which case feel free to make yourself at home

Also, his eyes aren’t in his head. They’re in his hands. He only sees what he reaches for, what he desires, what he wants.

what level of woke

Guillermo del Toro is a fucking artist and he knows what he’s doing. I love that man