milk boy

[guy who doesnt watch shows voice] yeah ive been meaning to watch that show

dude wait. what if we got really close together so we feel safe

bro. take shelter in my arms

Hey baby uwanna stick ur fingers in my cage

Well, I may be crazy and evil and a bitch,

How's the dental?

you can have all the teeth you can carry

one of the biggest tragedies of early 2010s tumblr is that the devil (bbc sherlock) took root as the face of johnlock when the guy ritchie films were RIGHT there

got too drunk last night and granted someone a boon

gen z is trying to cancel the mysterious and horrible obelisk im building at the edge of town

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

These are leaf cutter ants! They harvest leaves to take back to their nest. They don’t eat the leaves but instead feed it to a fungus they tend to and eat. These guys are farmers and the leaves are fertilizer. Such fascinating little creatures!

always funny to remember darth vader is anakin skywalker. the adrenaline junkie chucklefuck who used to dive head first out of speeders and built a pod racer in his yard when he was like six is now upper-middle management for the evil empire. half of his appearances in the original trilogy are Meetings. vader spends like 80% of his time dealing with bureaucratic bullshit. status updates. team meetings. holo-Zooms. budget rundowns. anakin betrayed the jedi and caused the fall of the republic and his punishment is being CC'd on every email forever. and you know what. he would hate that. the punishment fits the criminal

shoutout to the local radio dj reporting on the tornado warning and going "I will keep you entertained while you shelter in place" and then playing some really fucking creepy noise and ambient music