Cat Family - To the Fall Festival

As far as romantic relationships: Sokka loses Yue and twice has to leave Suki for their duty to the greater good. Katara is too overwhelmed with the conflict to invest in a relationship with Aang, and her first romantic feelings towards a boy are transformed into betrayal when Jet lies to her in his pursuit of justice. And even Zuko twice leaves Mai to pursue his “destiny.” And that’s just the kids. The adults are similarly submerged in devastated romance. We see so many single parents throughout the series. Many have lost their partner to the fire nation army. Some have incarcerated partners like Haru’s mother. Enlistment separates partners, too. And even the most dominating force in the world, Firelord Ozai, loses his partner in his desire for power.

Friendships are similarly prevented from blossoming within a culture of domination. Azula is the most evident example, with her friendships founded on obedience rather than mutual affection blowing up in her face. Zuko, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to have any friends. Those oppressed by the fire nation establish their friendships in moments of safety, when the threat of violence is temporarily absent. “Do you want to go penguin sledding with me?” That’s the beginning of a friendship. They do not become friends fighting together. That is allyship. Look at The Blue Spirit. Zuko and Aang can fight together for a common cause, but this is not the shape of friendship. Even relationships between different marginalized groups are fraught with tensions founded in the imperial violence they’ve confronted. When Aang visits the Northern Air Temple, he is distraught over the desecration of the temple by the earth kingdom refugees. The violence they’ve each faced puts them in conflict with one another rather than providing a possible sense of kinship. It’s even more complicated when it comes to befriending across the lines of the oppressor and oppressed. Despite their affinity for one another and aligned goals, Zuko and Aang cannot truly establish their friendship until the system of domination is eliminated. Friendship is a dynamic between equals, and ATLA asks whether you can actually be friends across these lines if society refuses to be equitable. Friendships and romance depend not on conflict to deepen them but an active peacefulness.

When people talk about Avatar writing relationships poorly, I think maybe consider that the relationships weren’t actually supposed to be building up in any kind of traditional way in the show. I think ATLA was precisely focused on relationships being broken and sometimes even empty because of conflict. It’s only the last episode that’s meant to show the beginnings of things, the consummation of hope. For the first time there’s the possibility for these relationships to mean something rather than almost inevitably ending in tragedy.

I once met a girl who was so proud to have hit such a bird on her bicycle, I swear, I thought that it was me she hit. I felt her handlebars in my stomach and now it is your job to feel it also. The pigeons are birds, they are doves. They are the nature of the city and the ones who no one loves. When people say they hate pigeons, I want to ask them if they hate themselves, too. Does it prick the well of your loathing? Do they make you feel dirty and ashamed? Are you embarrassed about how little or how much you have, for how you have had to hustle? Being dirty is not a problem for the pigeon. You can ask it, “How do you feel about having the city coating your feathers, having the streets gunked up in the crease of your eye?” and the pigeon would say, “Not a problem.” You will now stop blaming the pigeon. It is not the pigeon’s fault. The pigeon was once a dove, and then we built our filthy empire up around it, came to hate it for simply thriving in the midst our decay, came to hate it for not dying. The pigeon is your ally. They are chameleons, gray as the concrete they troll for scraps, at night they huddle and sing like cats. Their necks are glistening, iridescent as an oil-slick rainbow, they mate for life, and they fly.

still believe