Big Heart, Little Money

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

i’m going to be really honest with you guys i think the tendency to read the absolute worst possible intentions into every action you don’t agree with is getting too automatic and it’s eating you from the inside out

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

[Getting so angry it makes my brain disease worse] people sre supposed to be nice..

sharing a full screenshot uncropped is kind of like bending over in a little skirt and pulling it up a little

for sale: Baby Shoes Stylish Infant Boy Girl Unisex First Walker Shoes Toddler Walking Crib Shoes Lightweight Non-Slip Sneakers For 6 9 12 18 24 Months Baby Shoes New With Tags New In Box Excellent Condition Never Worn

you sit down at the plastic table because your partner likes being outside at the bar even though it’s 90 degrees and 60% humidity at 10pm and you thought this corduroy dress was soooo cute but now youre all sweaty and so one of your balls has escaped your panties but youre wearing fishnets so your loose nut is now dying like a sea turtle in a six pack ring and youre the desperate diver trying to save it but blind and one handed and stone faced cause you can’t draw attention to the fact that youre doing a high stakes wildlife rescue on your stupid scrotum in public because it might turn into a six month news cycle and desantis might fly out to personally bulldoze the bar. and its a thursday

washing dishes is evil because you go "oh fuck there's so many dishes this is gonna take foreverrr" and then you enter the dish abyss and emerge with your abdomen somehow covered in water and your hands all wrinky and then you look at the clock and what felt like half an hour was actually 10 minutes

gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me

Men in porn always so desperate for validation. "oh you like that cock? You like my cock?" go to therapy dude

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

they should make a Getting Out of Bed that doesn’t take an hour

Can you say something about fat people that doesn’t involve the phrase “tummy squish” or any variants thereof. Quickly

I know a couple fat guys and they're good electricians