“oh, yeah, we’re partners!” dazai said, patting the woman’s head reassuringly. “you’re in safe hands.”
“oh, thank god,” the woman breathed, as kunikida watched behind dazai for any movement. “so you two know each other well.”
“yep!” nodding, dazai helped the woman stand, allowing her to lean onto him. her injuries were light, but he was sure the shock of it all might hinder her ability to walk properly. much to his predictions, she wobbled, tilting into his hold.
“sorry,” she said quickly, a moment later. surprisingly, this was to kunikida, rather than dazai.
turning at the apology, kunikida frowned slightly. “huh?”
“i know you two are partners, i’m not trying to get in the way,” she murmured.
unsure what them being partners had to do with anything, kunikida shook his head. “it’s our job, ma’am, and we’ll do our best to do it properly. whatever you must do to keep yourself safe, you should proceed. we’ll adapt to it quickly, so there’s no need to apologize.”
“huh?” this time, it was the woman’s turn to be confused. she glanced at dazai. “ah, i meant… you two are partners, right?”
for a moment, both men simply stared at her. then understanding dawned on dazai’s face and a wide smile formed on his lips—though he did not share his discovery with kunikida, much to his distaste.
“ah! yes, yes, we are,” dazai said much too gleefully. “but not to worry. neither of us mind, else if we did our work would be much harder.”
“oh, alright,” the woman said, relieved, and allowed herself to be guided to safety.
once she was far enough from immediate danger, the two continued where they had left off before they found her, all the while making sure nothing in her vicinity would harm her. kunikida watched dazai’s near-diabolic grin for a moment before asking, “what was that all about?”
“oh, kunikida-kun, did you know that we’re dating?” dazai questioned so calmly that it took a moment for the inquiry to register.
nearly tripping on his own feet, kunikida struggled not to make a fool of himself in his shock. “what?!”
startled by the shout, the woman craned her neck, but finding no obvious source of stress, settled back down. dazai, meanwhile, continued with the mission as steadily as ever, ignoring kunikida’s indignant sputters.
“yes, yes, we’ve been dating since forever! you confessed in your sleep and we’ve been partners ever since,” dazai rambled, checking a discarded gun he’d picked up for bullets. it was empty, and he relaid the information to kunikida all whilst proceeding with his nonsense.
protesting, kunikida followed after him in his pursuit for clarity, almost missing the gun as dazai tossed it over to him for further inspection. he carefully put it away, still bombarding dazai with questions.
“what in the world are you going on about?” he demanded.
“partners, kunikida-kun,” dazai said, abruptly turning and tapping kunikida’s nose in a teacher-like manner, as if urging him to answer his own question. “she said we’re partners, right? and that we are!”
“we’re work partn—“ kunikida began, before pausing. “oh. oh, she misunderstood?”
“yes,” dazai agreed, failing to pat him. “good job, detective kunikida-kun. the case is solved.”
kunikida scowled. “why didn’t you just say—“
dazai interrupted him, waving off kunikida’s irritation. “it was obvious. i didn’t realize you could get so caught off guard that your brain might fly away, but that’s for another time. let’s get this over with and bring the poor lady home so she doesn’t think she’s caused a lovers’ quarrel.”
albeit annoyed, kunikida complied, huffing as he aided dazai in finishing the mission.
the woman, still close enough in proximity to hear them, wondered briefly why dazai hadn’t corrected her once he’d understood. then brushed it off, deciding that if he’d agreed with her, there must be something going on between the two. she went back to waiting patiently, watching them bicker from a distance.
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