it’s the smallest habits. how you spend your mornings. how you talk to yourself. what you read. what you watch. who you share your energy with. who has access to you. that will change your life.
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open


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@papacorn
it’s the smallest habits. how you spend your mornings. how you talk to yourself. what you read. what you watch. who you share your energy with. who has access to you. that will change your life.

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Big mood
the central conceit of white boy "comedy rap" genres is that they're too racist to recognise that most classic rap is already pretty humorous in many ways, on account of wordplay being fundamental to the form,
and also steeped in pop culture from the very beginning, like the rap scene was already making music about comics and anime and video games you don't need to segregate a new genre for that
Guy who's never even listened to MF Doom: "Wow this Bo Burnham guy has really brought humor and nerdyness into the rap genre!"
u guys omfg can we try feminism again. can we breathe life back into feminism's wounded and perishing body like OMFG she's dying...
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gold, opal, and enamel
by René Lalique

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we really can’t overstate how damaging it has been to indoctrinate the public with the idea that if they let themselves eat as much as they want, they’ll eat too much. human bodies, when permitted over the long term to eat as much as they want, actually get really, really good at calibrating their hunger and satiety, and will over time eat exactly the right amount for themselves. the common conception of a balanced eater as a minimal or restrained eater is absolutely wrong. balanced eaters eat quite a lot (compared to diet cultural ideas about right intake amounts), and they do so consistently and permanently. healthy, balanced eating isn’t some tightrope walk, it’s a gigantic net of total permission to eat.
tags via @theendofmybody
Do it scared but please don't do it hungry. Please don't do it dehydrated. It's gonna make it so much scarier. Please.
Hey, you, cis girl that's very (correctly) vocal about women being allowed to talk about their periods, do you include trans women in that?
I ask because every single time I've tried to talk about it to anyone that isn't a trans woman they get fucking angry. Which has caused me to have to just suffer in silence every single month. So I really relate to cis women when they talk about literally the exact same thing; being shamed by everyone around them their whole lives for talking about their periods, so they just suffer in silence every month as it negatively impacts their work and social lives. But I don't even feel like I can voice that I am literally dealing with the same exact thing because most of y'all react like you want to throw me in front of a bus for saying it, even those of you who act like your such big great transfem allies.
I guess I'll take this opportunity to talk about trans women periods. The first thing any tme person thinks when they hear this is always "how can trans women have periods? They don't have uteruses!"
The answer is: the uterus isn't what causes your period, it is effected by your period. What causes your period and what causes trans women's periods is the same thing: the endocrine system.
HRT changes the sex of your endocrine system. Feminizing HRT makes it a female endocrine system, giving us a 28-day hormone cycle just like cis women. At the end of that cycle, the hypothalamus floods the body with prostaglandins. Those are what cause all but one of the period symptoms, because they make muscles inflame and contract. They are what make the uterus shed its lining, they are what cause intestinal cramps, they are what cause body aches, they are what cause headaches and migraines. The only period symptom not causes by the release of prostaglandins throughout the body is depression, and that is caused by your endocrine system simply not processing as much estrogen and from simply feeling like shit.
So, the only symptoms trans women don't get every 28 days is menstrual cramps, because yes we do not menstruate since we don't have uteruses. But migraines, depression, body aches, intestinal cramps, and the infamous "period shits" don't exactly add up to us having any better of a time. Except we have to pretend that we're fine and nothing is different because no one believes that we get periods, not even cis women.
"But you can't call it a period then because that refers to MENSTRUATION!" is another one I hear all the time. This is incorrect. You use the word "period" instead of just "menstruation" because it doesn't just refer to menstruation. It refers to a period at the end of the hormone cycle where we experience a host of symptoms. And not all cis women experience all of the symptoms that encompass the period. Not all cis women get migraines, or body aches, or have severe depression. If a cis woman gets a hysterectomy she doesn't menstruate either! In that instance she experiences an identical period to what trans women experience. Yet, I doubt you'd insist that cis women who've had hysterectomies don't have periods.
Oh, another thing that I personally discovered after bottom surgery: vaginal odor changes for trans women during our periods too. I was not expecting that because I always thought it was just from menstruation. But nope, the ph levels of a trans woman's vagina are the same of as a cis woman's vagina, and it changes during our periods just the same.
Kid with a bluey backpack on the flight to Sydney this must be his mecca
When people argue that food from Chinese and Mexican restaurants in the US are not 'real' representations of that culture's cuisine ignore the historical reality that these dishes were developed by diasporic communities striving to recreate the flavors of home with available resources. Such criticism frames adaptation as a loss of authenticity, rather than recognizing it as a sincere and evolving expression of culture by people separated from their homeland.
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the phrase "but i didn't mean to!" in the context of causing harm is kind of redundant to me, because almost nobody means to cause harm. most of us just want to do the right thing. and i don't mean that in a wishy-washy "oh, we're all good deep down" way, i mean that even people who regularly do the most heinous shit imaginable will have a way of justifying it to themselves. the world is not populated by hollywood sadists and psychopaths.
actually i have been thinking about this some more and i want to add on to it:
abuse in caregiving professions (like teaching or nursing) is not solely a result of power dynamics. it's also because people who go into those professions often have a idea of themselves as Good People, and are consequently incapable of recognising or acknowledging when they've hurt someone else. instead, they mentally put 'people who have inconvenienced me' into the Bad People box so they can freely abuse them while maintaining their moral high ground.
i read ross greene a lot when i was working with "difficult" or "behaviourally challenged" children. his refrain is "kids do well if they can" - meaning, in short, that most kids act out only when the demands of a situation exceed their capabilities. punishing them for this is not only cruel but also completely pointless, because they also don't want to be doing what they are doing.
a teacher who believes that there are two categories of people - Good People who Mean Well, and Bad People who Cause Problems on Purpose - is not going to see it that way. they're gonna put themselves in the first category, and the misbehaving kid in the second category. and once they have effectively depersoned the child and placed themselves on a pedestal, the world becomes simple again. because abuse is something that only Bad People do.
i think understanding the family as a system of ownership over both women and children will lead you to understand both misogyny and the oppression of children a lot better and also be able to draw informative parallels between both
Conservative beauty standards are back with a vengeance which means it's especially important to go out this summer with bellies out and bodies unshaved. Also be unapologetically disabled with mobility aids and wearable medical devices and stim toys and ear defenders and all that stuff. You need it. People need to see it. Everyone needs to be reminded that life is unquestioningly more enjoyable when you're not living inside an arbitrary set of rules created by people who are offended by all the wrong things.
i don't remember so i'm not sure this is a thing but how were you taught about the 3/5ths Compromise? that clause of the US constitution that says slaves will be counted as 3/5ths of a person? was it like, oh that's bad because it is dehumanizing to be considered less than a full person?
like that isn't the problem there. these people were already enslaved. everything about how society and the economy and whatever was structured was premised on them not being human. The Problem is for what propose they were being counted as 3/5ths of a person. it was for apportioning representatives and taxes. the south had millions of people enslaved. 3/5ths of those millions were considered for how many representatives the states had in congress. the more slaves, the more political power. and this had repercussions that echo down through to today. and this is reflected today in prison populations being counted for political representation but incarcerated people being disenfranchised. and in gerrymandering and in gutting the voting rights act. in the continued denial of political power to black people.
literally like everything this country does is a badge of slavery. everything is reproducing slavery while trying to forget it.
oh and the other side of the compromises: the taxes. the south could continue to benefit from slavery and accumulated political power as long as it meant the north and the federal govt could accumulate wealth and capital in tandem.
maybe everyone knows this shit already but like the good guys were always benefitting from slavery from the absolute earliest days of this country's founding. they just didn't want the south to keep all the wealth generated from it. everything that happens today is designed to reproduce this.
what i wanna say is that the founding of the United States was premised on benefitting from chattel slavery and any compromise was to make sure every state and the federal government, not just southern slave owning states, could share in the wealth

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reminder that you cannot call people or things "retarded" around me. we will have a conversation where I explain that I can still tell you the names of 62 people for which I was legally responsible. I will tell you that I loved them
and you will feel like you were being an asshole and wonder why you don't just stop saying it altogether. me too.
if we're friends, you can call me a faggot. there can be a lot of tenderness in that. I got beat up and bullied and just generally treated like a detestable freak by people who called me that word while they did it. hearing it spoken by a loved voice, with clear affection, can be beautiful. it can feel like understanding, forgiveness, absolution, permission, and a thousand other wonderful things. it can be beautiful.
I got called retarded too, but we don't share any special insight into that. it's just a word to us. pick a different one.
a lady with a developmental disability once explained to me that she'd overheard some kids calling each other retarded in the mall we'd visited earlier that day. searching for something to say that might comfort her, I explained that they don't know anything about people like her and so they weren't really talking about her, just being ignorant.
she got angry and said "then they need to pick a different word". and so you need to pick a different word.
don't think this is exclusive to public spaces like the mall or the park or whatever either. she has a tablet and access to the internet, just the same as you do. she can read, write, and make her own decisions. she has a husband.
you don't know anything about her, you need to stop talking about her. pick a different word.
I'm glad this one is still going around.